Redemption

Chapter 10

Jonathan jumped out of the open top jeep and carried their luggage into the villa.

It was a gorgeous tropical day — the sun was shining and there was a pleasant breeze. He guessed the temperature was in the balmy 70s. They'd taken the coast road on their journey to the villa and the ocean had looked very inviting, he fancied a dip later on.The shuttle flight from San Francisco had taken just over an hour, with the transfer to the villa less than 20 minutes from the shuttle port in Suva. They were staying on the island of Vitu Levu, the largest of the Fijian Isles.

He placed Rebecca's bags in the larger bedroom. As her editor was paying for the trip and the whole thing was her idea he thought it appropriate that she have the larger room. Across the hall was the second bedroom, he entered and put his one bag on top of the bed. This room looked only slightly smaller than the master bedroom, and it appeared to have all the necessary amenities.

Each room had their own en-suite bathroom with a tub and a shower. The bed was a large double four poster with mosquito netting hanging from it. There was a chest of draws, and a wardrobe along with a bedside cabinet with a lamp and clock on top.
All in all Jonathan was satisfied with his accommodations.

"Come on out to the balcony."

He heard Rebecca's voice calling him, and went to investigate. He walked through the living room to join her.

"Isn't it beautiful here, Jon?"

"Yeah."

"It must make you feel proud when you see places of beauty like this to know your mission was a success."

He didn't answer, but gazed out onto the ocean. His eyes had grown steely, his jaw was clenched and every muscle in his body had tensed. Had she said something wrong?

"Jon?"

"What?" he snapped.

"You seemed to have tensed up."

"I'm fine."

"I can imagine the mission was hard on you and your crew, but I and the rest of Earth are grateful for what you did."

"So I hear," he answered sarcastically.

"Jon, what the hell is wrong with you? There's no need to be rude," she said in a slightly raised tone. "I make one little comment about your mission and you transform from Jekyll to Hyde."

"I'm sorry," he sighed, running his hands through his hair. "I guess I'm touchy when people mention our mission to the Expanse." Her comment had angered him, but she didn't deserve his sarcasm. How was she supposed to know the hell he and his crew had had to endure? According to Starfleet protocol he couldn't even tell her.

"You don't say," she answered with sarcasm, giving him a taste of his own medicine.

"Look Rebecca, I don't mean to be rude. I mean I don't go out of my way to upset the people around me, it's just…"

"Yes?"

"Well…you wouldn't say such things if you'd been the one out there."

"Okay, so I'm in the dark about whatever went out on out there. However, since I am in the dark, I think a little leeway on comments like you feeling proud of your successful mission are in order."

She was right. He had no right to snap at her like that. "Yeah…you have a point. My fuse is so short these days."

"Hmm…I won't argue about that. If you wanna talk—"

"No." He cut her off before she could make the offer.

"They say getting it off her your chest can help."

"I already said no, Rebecca," he answered with a touch of impatience. "Besides, I told you in San Francisco most of the mission details are classified. Even if I wanted to talk about it, I'm not permitted."

"You wouldn't have to tell me specifics…"

"Let's just drop it, okay?"

She nodded. He was so tightly wound. She'd never seen him like this before. She remembered the days of the NX-Project and his hatred of the Vulcans, but even then he'd been approachable and less snappish. Whatever had happened out there in the Expanse must have affected him very badly. Her brain was conjuring up all kinds of scenarios wondering what it was that plagued him.

"Thanks. One of the reasons I came out here was so I wouldn't have to talk or think about the Expanse or the Xindi."

He turned his attention back to the beautiful view Rebecca had referred to. It was certainly picturesque, what people would call the perfect vacation spot. The beach was deserted; he certainly wouldn't have to be concerned about being asked for autographs.

There was an endless expanse of white sand, complimented by emerald green water and white foamy waves as they crashed against the shore. Their villa was nestled amongst a forest of tall palm trees, providing the house with needed shade from the sun's rays. There was a short boardwalk from the balcony leading down to a few steps and then you were directly on the beach.

"You must be hungry," Rebecca noted. "Fancy some lunch?"

"What's on the menu?" They'd had a light breakfast on their flight over, but he did feel a little peckish.

"Smoked salmon with melon slices to start and then chicken Caesar salad with new potatoes."

"Hmm…sounds appetizing."

"Thought you'd like the sound of it."

"And you're just gonna whip this all up?"

"Sure. Won't take long." She left in the direction of the kitchen.

"Rebecca," he said walking in after her, "I thought you came here to rest, not work."

"Cooking isn't work, " she replied, smiling over her shoulder.

"Well I'll take you out to dinner tonight then. I don't want you slaving in the kitchen on my account."

"Deal. Now why don't you go and explore the beach and come back in half an hour?"

He nodded in accord and went to his room to change into something more beach-like — his travel attire had consisted of a shirt and a smart pair of pants. Picking out a pair of shorts and a sleeveless top he put them on, grabbed his sunglasses and returned to the balcony.

Following the boardwalk down to the steps, he slipped off his shoes and walked barefoot through the white sand. Porthos would have loved it here and Jonathan felt a tinge of regret at not bringing his beagle with him. His thoughts turned to T'Pol and he remembered his vision of her in the flowing white dress. Yes, she'd look perfect here amongst the palm trees and miles of deserted beach.

Rebecca was a great friend and it had been kind of her to invite him and arrange for all of this, but she wasn't T'Pol. Oh why was he even thinking like this? He was such an idiot. He'd told T'Pol no enough times, and he'd told himself the same. There could never be anything between him and his first officer and he just had to accept that and move on.

Dipping his foot in the ocean he noted the water was tepid, and looked forward to an afternoon swim. The current didn't seem too strong from visual observation but of course he wouldn't really be able to tell until he swam out. He'd go for a dip after lunch.

He strolled along the shoreline letting the waves lap at his feet. It was certainly peaceful here, but he hoped he didn't have too many quiet moments as that usually ended up in him ruminating. His purpose in coming was not to think, but to keep occupied.

Thirty minutes later he returned to the house and found Rebecca laying the table out on the deck. He enjoyed eating al fresco, especially after months of consuming meals in the grey surroundings of the Captain's Mess.

He sat down at the table. "This looks great, thanks." She went back into the house for a moment and soon returned with a glass pitcher.

"Passion fruit iced tea — right?"

"You remembered," he smiled.

"I like to think I have a good memory. You need one of those to be a journalist."

"You can pride yourself on it, Rebecca." He poured them both a glass.

With their starter finished she went back in for their Caesar salad. She gave Jonathan a generous portion, along with several potatoes and a bread roll. Her plan was to get him to eat as many carbohydrates as possible so he wouldn't look so skeletal.

"Glad to see you have a hearty appetite," she noted as she watched him tucking in.

"Must be the sea air."

"Mmm."

"And of course your cooking," he added.

"Thank you."

"So tell me what you've been up to while I've been away. You must have had many adventures."

She proceeded to tell him about the various places she'd visited over the last year, the people she'd met, stories she'd written and so forth. She could have mentioned how she'd encountered fear among people over the Xindi attack, but airing on the side of caution, omitted that tidbit.

"You get nominated for any awards this year?" he asked, knowing that she'd won things in the past.

"Not yet, but the nominations for the major journalistic awards don't get announced for another month or so. I was hoping to have entered my exclusive interview with you."

"Sorry, no can do."

"It's okay, I'll survive the disappointment," she smiled.

He finished up his salad, and collected the dirty plates carrying them into the kitchen. "That was delicious," he told her as he returned to the table. He poured himself another glass of iced tea.

An hour slipped past as they chatted, mostly about Rebecca's exploits over the last year. She in turn asked Jonathan a few questions, but kept her queries in regard to the Expanse to a minimum.

"What made you decide to leave Porthos behind? I'd have thought he would have loved it here."

Jonathan wasn't sure how to reply to that one at first. "I didn't want him to get in your way." After he said that he realized how stupid it sounded.

Rebecca gave him a puzzled look. "Jon, come on! I've been around beagles all my life. And it was my mom who gave you Porthos. What's the real reason?"

"Okay, I thought T'Pol might like to look after him. She'd mentioned that she'd cared for him while I was away from the ship on the last leg of our mission."

He omitted the part about him blowing up the Xindi weapon, the crew thinking he'd been dead and how he'd awoken in a Nazi hospital in 1944 New York. Those parts were all under the classified section of Starfleet reports.

"Oh." Somehow the idea of a Vulcan enjoying the company of a canine didn't seem that plausible, but perhaps T'Pol was different. Still there was more to this than met the eye. "And you denied Porthos the pleasure of roaming these pristine white beaches because you thought T'Pol wanted to care for him?"

"You're fishing."

"Yes." She saw no reason to deny it. "I know you Jon, don't forget that."

"Okay…I don't see any reason why you shouldn't know," he replied, shrugging his shoulders. He'd tell her why he's asked T'Pol to look after Porthos because if he didn't she'd be bugging him about it the rest of the afternoon.

"Since I was gonna be away for 2 weeks, I thought T'Pol would be more comfortable staying at my apartment than in a small hotel room which Starfleet had rented for her. If I'd asked her to stay she'd probably have said no. Using Porthos as a pretext, I thought my chances for an affirmative answer were higher."

"Hmm…" Rebecca mused.

"Hmm what?"

"Nothing." She smiled to herself. "She's very pretty."

"Who?"

"Your first officer."

"T'Pol?" he asked.

"Yes."

"I guess…haven't given it much thought."

"You're a hopeless liar, Jon!" she laughed.

"I don't keep her on my ship for her looks, Rebecca. She's the most efficient member of my crew."

"I'm sure she is." Rebecca paused for a minute recalling something. "Remember that night in San Francisco when we had dinner before you left for the Expanse?"

"Yeah, what about it?"

"Half the night you spent talking about her. I'm not stupid you know. Why didn't you ever tell her?"

Jonathan frowned. He didn't like the direction this conversation was heading, but decided to feign ignorance. "Tell her what?"

"As if I have to spell it out for you."

"Guess you will as I don't have a clue as to what you're talking about."

"No need to get testy, Jon. Honestly you'd think I'd stumbled across a top secret report or something the way you're reacting."

He sighed. He didn't want to get into all of this. It was obvious what Rebecca was driving at, though he was surprised that she'd picked up on his feelings for T'Pol at their last dinner in San Francisco almost a year ago. Had he really been that obvious?

He got up from the table and announced he was going for a swim. She was welcome to join him.

"I'd never keep up, I know what a good swimmer you are, and I'm not having anyone try to coax me out into the deeper waters." Rebecca acknowledged that it wasn't just the Expanse he didn't wish to talk about. His feelings for his first officer were off-limits too. She recalled the tense atmosphere at his apartment when he'd introduced her to T'Pol. What had been going on between them before her arrival?

"Chicken!" he taunted her.

"You can tease me all you like, I'm not going. I'll just take a book with me and watch you from the beach."

"Your loss," he said as he went inside to change. He bounded back from the house dressed in swimming trunks with a towel over his shoulder. Her eyes roved over his nearly nude body. He'd certainly kept in shape, and his muscles were more defined than ever. But the weight loss was rather apparent, and she missed his meatier look…but he could always regain the weight.

"Change your mind?" he asked.

"Nope. You go commune with mighty Neptune or whatever it is you swimmers do."

"Okay, you're coming to the beach though?"

"Yeah, I'll be there in about 10-15 minutes. Just don't come out of the water with an octopus on your head or something. You know I'm squeamish."

He'd done that once on a short vacation of theirs to Baja California, and she'd run from him screaming while he chased her. He'd found the whole thing rather amusing.

"I promise, no octopuses." He chuckled and walked off in the direction of the beach.
She watched him, admiring his muscular back. He'd seemed like the old Jonathan just now, pleasant and in good spirits. Trying to find out what was eating him was going to be a challenge. Maybe after a few days of sun and sand he'd feel more like opening up, but it could be she was being too optimistic.

She wondered if T'Pol knew…she guessed she did, after all she'd been there with him. Maybe T'Pol had tried to get him to deal with his feelings, and he being the stubborn fool he was, refused to listen. From her brief chat with the Vulcan earlier today outside Jonathan's apartment, she'd gathered T'Pol knew more than she was letting on. Of course she was also bound by Starfleet not to reveal classified matters. She'd said Jonathan had been subjected to a great deal of stress — that much was evident.

Rebecca sighed. For the time being all of this would have to remain a mystery. She went into the house and changed into her swimsuit.

Jonathan deposited his towel on the sand and ran into the water with enthusiasm. The depth increased quite suddenly and once he about 20 feet into the water, it was already up to his chest. A few more feet and he guessed he wouldn't be able to stand — not that that was a problem for a swimmer of his proficiency.

The water was glorious and the current not too strong. A wave would wash over the top of him every minute or so, but he didn't mind. It felt so good to be in the water, he'd really missed this. He'd mentioned to Trip once that they should have a swimming pool on board but the commander had replied it probably wouldn't be the best place to be if the gravity plating went offline.

He swam quite far out. He stopped and just treaded water looking out at the area he'd traversed. The house he and Rebecca were staying in looked like a miniature of itself. He spied a dot sitting on the beach and assumed it was Rebecca. He regretted not wearing a diving mask, he wouldn't mind checking out what was below him. He decided to risk it anyway, knowing that the salt water would probably irritate his eyes if he kept them open too long while under the surface.

Inhaling deeply, he dived under the water and swam a few feet down. He estimated the depth to be around 20 feet and he soon reached the bottom. The area was teeming with life — different colored fish, a sea turtle, various sea dwelling plants, starfish and stingrays.

Feeling his eyes already beginning to sting, he made his way back to the top. As he broke the surface he gasped for breath. Content with his exploration for the time being, he swam back towards Rebecca leisurely.

TBC