Awaken before the Emerald Dawn

By: trappedineternity

Disclaimer: I don't own any of it. The characters belong to J.K Rowling. The plot bunny belongs to Black Ice. I am the owner of the fleshy part in the middle. This does contain spoilers. So if you have no read the 5th book, time to turn away. That and I am horrible at accents, so bare with me.

Warning: This story will contain yaoi. If you don't like it, I suggest you leave now. It might contain a few lemons and limes, but there will be warning at the beginning of the chapter and before the lime or lemon begins for those who don't wish to read them, they may skip over it ahead. Furthermore, this fic is dark and thus contains thought and possible acts of suicide and depression. Not your type of thing, I suggest you find something else… I'll accept comments and criticism but nothing about what I've just warned about. Warning, there is talk of RAPE in this chapter! Nothing in graphic detail mind you, but it's still there!

Summary: check first chapter.

Side note: I would like to apologize for the lack of updates. School has taken priority and I have a bit of writer's block on how to continue this chapter. I am glad that so many people like it. So many hits and comments, it makes me pleased, I hope the long wait didn't scare you off. I will try to make my writing better as well, taking some advice from my comments. Thank you ALL for commenting and this is the long awaited chapter.

Chapter 9

Hell

The air was thick with the smell of sex and mildew, causing Severus to wrinkle his nose in disgust. He curled up as much as he could in the bed, making himself the smallest target possible. It proved to be complicated, his whole body protested at the slightest movement. He willed the world and the pain to simply vanish, to no avail.

He knew how badly he was injured; he knew he would be sore… He could feel the blood, among other fluids, flowing down his thigh, pooling in the soiled sheets below him. Ever since he set foot in this room, thanks to loving Lucius, he had lost his concept of time. But there was an always present reminder to tell him where he was, and what had happened during his stay here.

He felt the bed dip and cold fingers thread through his hair. He cringed involuntarily and closed his eyes tightly, once again, willing the world to disappear, or death and darkness to claim him, whichever came first. "You are beautiful Severus.", the man hissed. Silence was his reply. "Lucius was asking about you. He said something about school starting soon. Can you believe you've been here two weeks already? Mmmm, Lucius will be coming this evening to bring you back to the castle. Until then… I think a good bye is in order."

Severus tensed up and sobbed. Would this never end?

Lucius paced outside the door. It had been hours since he was asked to wait outside. He had wanted to catch the six o'clock train to Hogwarts, but it was nearing midnight and the dark lord had yet to show himself. He could only imagine what was going on in there. He tried his best not to think about it… It was simply too horrible to think about. His conscious on the other hand, enjoyed reminding him exactly what had happened, and how it was entirely his fault that Severus was forced to endure this punishment.

He was worthless; he couldn't even protect his friend. He could go as far as blame Snape Sr. for this, as it was he who started all of this, but then, he wasn't the one who gave Severus over to Voldemort this time… No, he was pathetic. He doubt Severus would ever forgive him.

His thoughts were interrupted by the door opening and a very satisfied Voldemort coming out in a long green robe. "Ah Lucius, so good to see you. He's in the bedroom… Be sure to get him cleaned up before you bring him back to Dumbledore. We wouldn't want him to get suspicious.", he said in a cool voice before disappearing to one of his private chambers.

Lucius was afraid to go inside. He knew he wouldn't like what he saw. None the less, he plucked up his courage and walked inside. There, on the bed on his stomach, was Severus, who stared blankly at the headboard.

He felt his stomach turn to ice at the sight of him. He hurried over to his childhood friend and looked him in the eyes. They were vacant, staring ahead as if he couldn't see the real world, didn't want to see it. He shook his head as he picked him up and brought Severus into the washroom. He filled the tub and cleaned him off.

There was nothing more disturbing that watching Severus at this moment. It was like bathing a rag doll. He merely laid there and let Lucius do what he wanted to him. He scrubbed at dark haired boy's flesh to get every trace of the two weeks off. His skin was red and raw when he was done.

To say that Lucius was panicked would be an understatement. He was hysteric. He helped this happen. All of this was his fault. "Severus… Severus it's me… Lucius… Remember?", he asked. Still the vacant stare, nothing more. "Please, say something Sev… Anything at all. Curse, whispered, yell at me, hit me, start talking in tongues… I don't care… just show me that you're still there!"

Those dark eyes soon fell on Lucius. "I wasn't talking… because my throat is raw Malfoy…", he whispered, his voice hoarse. Lucius looked relieved and hugged him. He knew he had no right to touch Severus, but he was so happy that he was broken! "Get away from me.", came another whisper. Lucius' heart sank. He couldn't have believed everything would be fine, could he? He nodded and pulled away. "Sorry… Guess its too late to say that I had no choice and that our lord would have killed me?", he said. Snape growled. "Your lord… not mine…"

Somehow, Snape rose to his feet and dried himself off. Where he got the strength, Lucius could only wonder. He put it down under sheer will. He helped Severus into some clothes and brought him to a fire place. They would floo to Hogsmeade and then take a carriage from there.

The entire way, Snape's face was guarded and blank. He stared out the window and didn't speak. Lucius couldn't help but sigh. This was the punishment; this was the price he paid for living. He had destroyed the innocence in Severus… Destroyed what little of it there was left…

Severus knew that Harry thought that he cheated on him, that it would be hard to regain… was it even worth it? Severus was broken, he knew he was. He was unfeeling, and the thought of any kind of relationship made his squirm. No. Harry deserved better than this… Better than some greasy, willowy, pale teenager could offer. Let him be with Lupin and Black and Potter. Perhaps one of them would take him. Severus decided, then and there, that he would remain, the rest of his years, alone… If he couldn't have Harry, which he knew he couldn't, then he wanted no one at all. Life alone would be much simpler.

Harry sighed as he woke up another day in the cold, dark room. Severus still hadn't returned, which confused him. He looked at the case of potions that he was given, that he had been using. Dreamless Sleep was so much better than being awake. Any thought of Severus could render the boy to tears.

Had he really fallen in love with the soon to be greasy potions' professor of his time? Now that he thought about it more closely about it, maybe he always liked Snape, and had been trying to find ways to dislike him. Maybe this is what caused Snape to hate him.

He curled up in a ball and sighed. Maybe this was all for the best. He couldn't have had a future with Snape, considering that he was still a child in his present while Snape had aged… of course he would be of age soon, but that wasn't the point. There was still a big gap between them…

He had been talking a lot with Remus about this, about Severus and his life. He couldn't imagine living without him… Didn't want to imagine living without him. But what else could he do now. He was with Lucius; he had seen them together in the shower…

He felt like his heart could break from it, or that it already had. He groaned as the tear flooded his eyes and spilt over his cheeks. He couldn't live without Severus. Didn't want to live in a world where he wouldn't be with him. He would already loose everyone else… and now he was loosing the man he loved… There, he admitted it to himself. He loved Severus Snape…

He looked at his nightstand. There was only one thing to do then… He couldn't continue like this anymore. He refused to… There was just too much pain… too much everything. No one would miss him. They all had someone to comfort them. Remus had Sirius, Hermione had Ron, his father had his mother and Snape had Malfoy… everything was happy in their little couples… and so, with that in mind, of all the pain in his life, Harry drew the knife from his nightstand and blew out the candle.

If I said the end, I would die wouldn't I? To Be continued.

Sorry about the long wait, and the shortness of this chapter. I am still alive and I will try to put out more of these chapters. I am sorry and I am glad that you are all still reading. Continue to feed the author, maybe some suggestions on what you would like to see happen? Or that you like what has happened so far. Thanks again, see you in the next chapter.

Snape: So this is the marking point to when I became a greasy, heartless git huh? Sounds about right.

Lucius: I didn't mean it! I was under a spell! That's it! A spell!

Severus: As if I would believe that…what about Harry? Are we ever going to get laid? I mean… this is NINE whole bleedin' chapters, and the most action I've seen was from Volde…Voldemort… (falls into fetal position)

Trappedineternity(tie): You can cut the trauma with a knife…

Harry: that's a wonderful idea! (gets his knife)

TIE: that's not what I meant!

Severus: (rocking back and forth, muttering)

Lucius: That's it, I'm checking you ALL into St-Mungo's!