Disclaimer; I don't own Harry or his lovable band of friends...

A/N Hi everyone! I hope you all had a wonderful holiday. Just a quick note. When I end a chapter I usually end it there for a reason. If it is a cliffy, it's because I want to keep you reading the story and wanting more. If it just cuts off, it's because I want something to happen in the next chapter and it is too long to add to this chapter. Don't flame me for when the chapters end please. Thank you. Happy reading and dont forget to reveiw.

Harsh reality

Hermione rushed to the fireplace and swept past Molly.

"What's the matter dear?" she asked seeing Hermione's rushed state of mind.

"Draco…he's awake. I have to get back to St. Mungo's." she blurted out before grabbing a clay pot of floo powder and throwing it quickly into the fireplace.

"St. Mungo's" she shouted stepping into the emerald green flames.

The fire surrounded her and soon she was stepping into the lobby and racing down the hall to where they were keeping Draco. She ran so fast that she passed by Harry and Ginny without even saying 'hello'. Just as she was about to open the door to his room a hand grabbed her shoulder and whipped her around.

"Harry!" she said startled. "You surprised me, how long ago did he wake up?"

"About thirty seconds before I owled you. But Hermione, it's not all good news."

"What do you mean?"

"He's not quite right yet. That's why I'm out here. He sort of…kicked me out of the room. Cho is working on fixing it."

"Kicked you out? Whatever for?" she asked.

"He doesn't quite remember that we are civil now. He doesn't remember much of anything since he fled with Snape. He doesn't know that that his mother is dead." Harry said calmly.

The weight of the situation set in Hermione.

"If he doesn't remember any of that…then what else doesn't he remember Harry?" she asked wide eyed hoping beyond hopes that he would not say what she already knew.

"You." Harry said hanging his head. "But Cho says it's only temporary and any little thing could make his mind snap back. He is weak, and was given several potions for strength. I don't think you should go in there."

"THIS IS YOUR FAULT HARRY!" Hermione suddenly shouted.

"My fault? What are you talking about?" he said confused.

"If you had just let me be here when he woke up none of this would have happened." she started to sob for the millionth time in four days.

"He lost a lot of blood, and his brain was cut off of oxygen. He might have done something to you had you been there when he woke up. It's no ones fault 'Mione." he said soothingly.

"It's Snape's fault. And if I EVER see him again I will curse him into oblivion." she said through her tears.

"Sit down." Ginny said guiding her to a seat near the door.

"NO!" Hermione said. "I want to see him."

"You can't. Cho is in there. Maybe she will have good news when she comes out."

Hermione sat there biting her lip for what seemed like an eternity. Finally Cho emerged.

"How is he?" Hermione asked before anyone could say a word.

"Stable. He's lucky to be alive." she said writing something on a piece of paper.

"I mean does he remember…" she started, but her tears interrupted.

"No." Cho said grimly. "It is most likely temporary. Any little thing could jog his memory. But right now he is being a real prat. Complaining about the room, the food, the care I am giving him. It's almost like being back at school."

Hermione's stomach felt like it was sinking to the bottom of her body. She was in love with a man who would most likely curse her the moment she stepped in the room.

"Is it safe to go in?" Hermione asked cautiously.

"I don't know…" Cho started. "He is in a right foul mood. No wand though so he can't do that much damage."

"Right." Hermione replied.

"Hermione." Harry called.

"What?"

"It's not a good idea. Trust us." he said. Ginny nodded behind him.

"I don't care." she said solemnly. "I have to see for myself."

She walked purposefully towards the glass door and peered in. Her breath caught in her through as the old Draco Malfoy she had come to know and loathe was sitting in the bed. His face was screwed up in a scowl as he sat there shouting at a house elf that was taking away an untouched lunch tray.

"AND IF YOU EVER BRING ME SLOP LIKE THAT AGAIN I WILL TAKE IT UP WITH MY FATHER. HE AND MY MOTHER MAKE HEFTY DONATIONS TO THIS DUMP!"

Hermione had to admit his shouting scared her. She straightened up and went in the door just as the frightened house elf was leaving.

"Hello." she said softly to a man she barely recognized.

"What the fuck do you want mudblood?" he sneered. "I am not cooperating with the ministry."

He crossed his arms and stared at her.

"Oh, it's not that Draco…" she started taking a seat next to his bedside.

"Who do you think you are mudblood? We don't know each other or like each other enough to use first names."

"Do you remember anything Draco? Anything at all?" she asked with hope in her voice.

"What are you going on about?" he hissed. She could feel his loathing for her.

"About the last year? The last few months? The Horcruxes? Anything?" she asked.

"You obviously need to be here more than I do. You are addled in the brain. Leave."

It was not a request, more an order.

"Draco please…" she begged. Her voice was cracking.

"What the fuck is wrong with you?" he asked piercing her with his steely grey eyes.

"Think!" she shouted. "Try as hard as you can!' she screamed.

Just then Cho came in and led Hermione out of the room.

"That won't work." she told Hermione. "Shouting at him…it won't work."

"Oh Harry!" she said throwing herself over his shoulders.

Harry wrapped his arms around Hermione and held her tightly.

"I'm so sorry Hermione." Harry calmed her.

"What am I going to do?" Hermione sobbed. "He called me mudblood…and he doesn't remember anything. Anything at all."

"I know." he replied.

They sat like this for hours, in the waiting room just outside his room. Harry forced her to eat, sleep and carry on like a zombie for as long as he could. The hours turned into days, which turned into weeks. Cho was not optimistic about his recovery.

"I'm sorry Hermione. I have to send him home. He's healthy other than his memory. I can't keep him here any longer."

Hermione nodded numbly. She had of course tried to talk to him over and over but he just would not listen. He sent her away usually as soon as she walked in the door. She would beg and plead with him to just remember but he never would even make an effort.

Nearly a month after the attack Draco was being released from the hospital. Hermione wanted to be there but Harry talked her out of it. He was going back to Malfoy Manor. Going back to a house that he knew was empty but didn't remember how it got that way. He had of course been told that his mother had died by Cho. But other than that his brain could not retain his former life. Hermione sat at number 12 Grimmauld place crying that morning. Crying and vomiting in the rubbish bin. She felt horrible. Actually horrible was putting hit mildly. She was sick with the flu. Everyone had tried to get her to go to St. Mungo's but that place held terrible memories for her now. She doubted she would ever go back. His silver eyes haunted her dreams. And that was enough to make her feel like the world was full of no joy, only despair. After a few days of throwing up, Harry owled Cho and had her stop by the house.

When she arrived, Hermione was curled up on the sofa staring into the orange flames of the fire. Her eyes were red and swollen, and her skin was blotchy.

"Hermione?" Cho asked cautiously. "Hermione can you hear me?"

Hermione nodded but said nothing.

"How are you feeling?" she asked taking several bottles out of her healer's bag.

Hermione looked at her and Cho saw that something had died inside of her. She shrugged her shoulders before returning her gaze to the fire.

"I see. Well I would like to do some tests if you don't mind. Harry says this flu has been with you for a week already. Let's take a look shall we?" she asked.

Hermione nodded.

Cho ran some tests, chanted some spells and used some potions to test Hermione for everything she could think of. After hours she had the results.

"Hermione, you are going to be fine. You are pregnant." she said softly. Mistakenly thinking this would be good news to Hermione.

Her head whipped around to look at Cho. The chocolate brown eyes that had once been full of laughter and life were listless. Finally she spoke.

"Pregnant?" she said softly. "Pregnant?" her whole body began to shake.

"Yes, about a month along. Would you like to know the sex?" she asked.

"It's a girl." Hermione said.

Cho cocked her head and looked at her patient.

"That's right. How did you know that if you didn't even know you were pregnant?"

"I just know."

"Oh, well stop by my office…it's not at St. Mungo's…and we will check on the baby once a month okay? You take care of yourself." she said smiling and using the floo to get back to her office. Harry and Ginny who were in the room the whole time stared at Hermione, expecting some reaction of joy. But she sat there blankly.

"'Mione? Are you alright?" Harry asked adjusting his glasses as he sat next to her on the sofa.

Then suddenly it was as if a light went off inside her head.

"Oh yes. I'm fine…just fine." she said standing up and absentmindedly rubbing her still flat stomach.

"Can I get you something Hermione?" Ginny asked.

"No. I'm going to take a shower." said Hermione.

"If you need anything…just ask okay?" Ginny said. "My mum will be thrilled; she will finally be able to knit some baby things."

Hermione forced a smile at Ginny before climbing the steps.

'Pregnant.' she thought 'I am pregnant with his child and he doesn't even know.' Her whole body felt weak and trembling.

She forced herself into the shower and stood there for eternity thinking. When she emerged a plan had already formed in her head. She went into her bedroom and got dressed. A long yellow and pink sundress and sandals. She put her hair up into a messy ponytail and applied some light makeup.

She walked downstairs past Harry and Ginny. They looked at her as if she had a bird on her head. They had not seen her out of her grimy pajamas in over two weeks.

"Where are you going 'Mione?" Harry asked.

"To tell him." she said blankly.

"You can't. He might hurt you. He doesn't need to know." Harry said pleadingly.

"He does need to know. Maybe he will remember." she said.

They tried to stop her but it was too late. She had grabbed a handful of floo powder and threw it into the flames of the living room fireplace.

"Malfoy Manor, Draco's room." she shouted before stepping inside and letting the fire take her away.

When she landed it was in a dark room. The fire was barely burning giving the room an eerie glow. The walls and furniture were dark wood. And the giant bed was covered in black bed linens. She groped around for her wand and whispered;

"Lumos!"

The tip of her wand glowed faintly. She stood up and dusted her dress off before making her way to the bedroom door. He was not in there, thank Merlin. Sticking her head out the door she listened for any sounds. The large home was dead silent. Only the creaking floorboards made any noise as she walked. The house was mammoth and cold. Cobwebs hung from every fixture. And it had an air of death. Room after room was empty as she searched. Finally she came to the Library. The room they came to searching for information all those months ago. A tiny light burned on a table off to the right of the doors. Sitting there hunched over a book was Draco. His face was relaxed and his hair fell into his eyes as he squinted trying to read in the dim light.

Hermione's heart was pounding in her chest. She didn't know how he would react to her being in his home. Or about the baby.

"Draco?" she said softly. Too softly. He didn't look up.

"Draco?" a little more loudly. His head whipped up to stare at her with those icy eyes she loved so much.

"Just what the fuck do you think you are doing breaking into my home? You will be going to Azkaban for this. My family has clout with the ministry."

Clearly he was still somewhat confused; his family was disgraced in the wizarding world.

"Please, just hear me out and I will be gone. I will never bother you again."

"You must be fucking joking. I don't want to listen to anything you have to say. Now get out!" he said standing up and grabbing her by the shoulders.

"Please…" she started crying. "You need to know…you deserve to know."

"Well get on with it then. I have to wash my hands after touching you." he sneered. The words cut right through Hermione but she pressed on.

"I know you don't remember, but I saved your life. I healed you and brought you to Harry's house…"

"Potter? You fucking took me to Potter's house? Why the hell are you telling me this? To give me nightmares?"

"No, but you helped us defeat Voldemort, and we…well we fell in love." she blurted.

"ME? LOVE YOU? You really need to seek help mudblood." he said walking away waving his hand for her to leave.

"I'm pregnant." she said, tears building in her eyes.

"So?"

"It's yours."

"It's not. You had better go tell Weasel he's the daddy because I am not."

"You are Draco…you are!" she sobbed. "Try to remember! Please just try!"

"I would never stick my dick in a trashy mudblood slut like you. Now leave before I make you leave."

Hermione felt her heart literally break. She didn't try to convince him anymore. She just hung her head and walked out of the library and out the back door she had come in with Draco, Harry and Ron merely two months ago. Once outside she apperated back to number 12.

And there was a surprise waiting for her when she got there.