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Rory´s POV: picks up exactly where the last chapter has stopped.
I rubbed my temples and dropped my head to the ground, suddenly extremely interested in my shoes. I felt his gaze on my body and I involuntarily shivered. When I wouldn't speak up, I could hear him turning around slowly. He softly stroked my elbows one last time and tilted his head to one side.
"So, I'm heading back to the diner." I opened my mouth to say something, but no words would come out. I swallowed as if I needed my throat to get used to the movements. I attempted it again, finally succeeding.
"Hey Jess?" I exclaimed and I feared that he hadn't caught my words, since he already was far away. He swirled around, raising an eyebrow as if to ask what?
"I know, I'm probably the last person you wanna be with right now, but my Mom wants us to go together, so what now?" Even from where I was standing I could see Jess shrug his shoulder in confusion.
"Would it hurt too much if you came over here, so I don't have to yell?" He frustrated me, although I knew that I somehow deserved it.
Lazily, slowly, Jess made his way over to me, his hands not leaving his pockets. The weight of his hands made his jeans hang low on his hips and as he raised his left arm to scratch his head, a barely visible dark trail of hair from the waistband of his boxers was revealed, only to disappear under his grey shirt. A sudden shot of disappointment went through me as he buried his hand back in his pocket once again. I shook my head.
"And she talks." Jess sarcastically remarked and stopped right in front of me.
Now it was my time to shrug.
"Yeah, well. Anyhow, what now?" Jess let his gaze linger nn my face only for a split second before he began scanning the trees behind me.
"Well, it's you mother's day, right? Who are we that we could possibly deny this to her. She seemed kinda excited." I let out a deep breath. The pretending game started all over again, but in the back of my mind I couldn't help but wonder if this might be a second chance. A second chance for what? I wasn't so sure.
"Okay, it's not that we really have to spend the night together…." I trailed off, realizing how wrong this had come out. Jess smirked as I met his eyes once again. He had noticed it too.
"What I meant was, I mean, we go together, sit down at the table, and that's it. No dancing, no forced conversations, no whatever." I added in one breath. Jess seemed to be thinking about my suggestion and finally nodded.
"Okay."
"Okay." I stupidly repeated.
"How about I come by the diner tonight, then we can go together. Say around seven?" Jess chuckled slightly and I eyed him curiously.
"What?" Jess stiffed another chuckle.
"It's just, that this is all too surreal, I mean about a week ago I was gonna ask you to go with me to this specific dinner and now…" he put up his hands in surrender, gesticulating with his hands. I wrapped my arms around me, pulling my coat tighter to my body.
"Yeah, I know what you mean." My voice was barely audible.
One last glance and he was gone. I looked after his disappearing figure until I couldn't make out his silhouette any more.
"Mom?" I exclaimed as I entered the house.
"Kitchen" came her sudden response. I made my way over there and leaned against the doorframe. I observed my mom as she was sitting at the table, sipping her cup of coffee. She had a smile on her face, starring off into space. Her smile seemed to be contagious as I felt my lips lifting up in a smile as well.
"You're happy." I spoke softly so I wouldn't disturb the peaceful atmosphere. Mom looked up to me, beaming.
"I'm happy." I fully entered the kitchen and sat down on a chair next to her. She silently pushed her cup of coffee towards me.
"Coffee?" she asked and I nodded and took a sip. I felt comforted by the feeling of the hot liquid running down my throat and for the first time in a week, I allowed myself to relax.
"So..." Mom started. I got the feeling that I wouldn't like where she was heading.
"You wanna tell me what happened between you and Jess?" I contemplated if I wanted to tell her, on the one hand I was dying to fill her in, on the other hand I didn't want to upset her. I didn't want her to think of anything than her happiness. I sighed as I made my decision.
"Jessistheguy!" it came out as one word. Mom rolled her eyes and chuckled.
"So? Jess is a guy." I played with my hair, twisting it around my index finger, a bad habit.
"THE guy." I corrected mom, leaned back waiting for it to dawn on her. I could practically see the wheels in her head as they started to make a connection. Suddenly Mom yelped and clasped her hand over her mouth.
"Holy shit." Despite the situation I was in, I stiffed a laugh, since Jess had reacted exactly the same way.
"My sentiments exactly." Then I proceeded to fill mom in. The date, the night, the bailing and the fact that I had ignored him all week. It made me gag, saying it out loud that is.
When I finished my speech, Mom looked at me with wide eyes and as if she wasn't sure if she was dreaming, she asked me to pinch her, which I did. Mom yelped in pain and got up to pour herself yet another cup of coffee. She watched me from the counter and I leaned back into the chair, breathing heavily, heart beating. What's the verdict? I silently asked myself.
"So, where does it leave you? I mean, I saw you talking earlier. He didn't bite your head of, what now? I mean, Gosh, I'm so stupid, I suggested the whole going together thing, I'm sorry, hon. If I had known..." I cut her off.
"Mom, calm down, please. You're making me nervous." Mom nodded her head in understanding and sat down next to me again.
"We're gonna attend the dinner together. I have absolutely no clue as to know where we stand. No idea at all." I sighed sadly and buried my head in my hands. I could feel mom's hands as she stroked my back. It was good to be home.
After I had helped mom to get ready, I gathered my purse and went out to "pick up" Jess.
I didn't know what to expect so it was understandable that my stomach was a bundle of nerves when I knocked at the diner's door. I could see him through the window as he came down the stairs. He looked absolutely gorgeous. He was wearing faded jeans and a black button down shirt with a white tee shirt underneath. His hair was sticking up wherever and I couldn't help but grin at the sight of him. Through the window our eyes locked for about a second, and I could feel myself blushing as he checked me out openly.
I looked down at me, suddenly feeling insecure. I was wearing a grey skirt with black boots that reached my knees and a top that had a really low neckline. I liked it and mom had convinced me to wear it; But suddenly I felt uncomfortable, so I pulled my coat tighter around me, wrapped the scarf protectively around my neck and dug my hands deep in the pockets of my coat. My exterior matched my interior now; I was feeling like an insecure little kid, maybe inadequate even.
He opened the door and stepped out, Once again our eyes met, this time it was him who broke contact.
"Hey!" he greeted me politely and buttoned up his jacket.
"Hey!" I shyly replied, feeling like a thirteen year old on the first date. Stop it, Rory! That's not a date. I scolded myself and started moving towards the Dragon Fly where the dinner would be held.
I felt like I should prepare him for whatever this evening might have in store for him.
"You want an advice?" He turned to look at me and raised his eyebrow when he heard my voice.
"Huh?" back to Mr. Monosyllabic
"Stay away from Miss Patty. Don't question it, just stay away." He nodded and repeated after me.
"Stay away from Miss Patty! Okay, got it." I liked the little banter between us, it made me relax.
"If Kirk asks you if you needed shampoo, politely decline. You wouldn't want your hair to fall out, now would you?" Forcefully he shook his head.
"Nope, definitively no. Stay away from Kirk also; dully noted." I laughed at the panic on his face when I mentioned the hair part. It was hilarious.
"So, you're a hair guy, huh?" I decided to be blunt and somehow daring, leaving the easy and comfortable path. I wanted to get to know him.
"Hair guy?" Jess once again raised an eyebrow.
"Yeah, guys normally have at least one obsession. It's biceps, abs or hair."
Jess laughed at this and flashed me with one of his rare genuine smiles.
"That's one profound observation. And yes, from all the above, I'm most likely to be a hair guy." I tilted my head and tried to watch him without being noticed. Apparently I succeeded, because all the way to the Inn, I was able to cast glances, examining his profile, memorizing each and every freckle. We didn't continue with our conversation, but enjoyed having found some sort of common ground. When we reached the Dragon fly, I gave him a quick info about it, about Mom's and Sookie´s dream, about the Independence Inn that had caught fire and about the grand opening night, where it had all started with Mom and Luke, I only left out a small detail….When Jess was about to push open the door that would lead us into the entrance hall, I grabbed him by his elbow and slowly made him turn around.
"Just so you know, my mom knows." He wrinkled his forehead.
"Knows what?" but suddenly he realized what I had implied. He nodded.
"Does Luke know?" I shook my head no, making him sigh relieved in return.
"I guess I might survive the night then, huh?" I smiled and entered the Dragon Fly, taking in my surroundings.
The dining room was beautifully decorated, flowers, but not too many, dimly lit, one big table in the middle which was prettily set. A live band was playing softly in the background.
I walked around the room, greeting the guests, having small talk with some of them. My grandparents weren't able to make it, they were still out of town, and secretly I assumed that was one of the reasons mom had picked this date. They still didn't accept Luke as Mom's husband to be, still hoping that one day she'd find someone suitable in their eyes; someone she'd make a nice trophy wife. I suddenly realized that somewhere along my mindless strolling around the dining hall, I had lost Jess. I spotted him, sitting in one of the chairs near the fire place. The flames made his hair look black as he was sitting there, starring into space. My throat tightened at the sight and I could the tears forming in my eyes as I thought about the missed opportunity to clear the air, our status. Mom came rushing into the room, dragging Luke along with her, hands firmly intertwined. Despite Luke's annoyed expression I could tell that he was happy. They made each other happy, and I couldn't help but notice that I was somehow jealous. Mom whispered something in his ear which made Luke chuckle and then they came over to where I was standing.
"Hey, honey, let's take our seats, the dinner's almost ready, well, at least Sookie stopped hyperventilating about five minutes ago." Then she directed the words to her guests.
"Dinner's about to be serves, take your seats, please." The people started moving, looking for their designated seats. I swallowed as I saw that I was to sit next to Jess. Mom on my right side, Jess on my left and across from me Babette and Miss Patty. I sighed and put on a happy face, not wanting to destroy the cheery atmosphere and most of all, not making my mom feel sorry for me.
I sat down and shortly after Jess took his seat as well, placing his napkin on his lap. He leaned over and silently pointed across the table.
"Miss Patty?" I nodded and chuckled slightly.
"Miss Patty." I confirmed and took a sip of the wine being placed in front of me, needing something to occupy my hands with.
"Ladies and gentlemen, I am so glad that you could make it, I'm happy to celebrate this special occasion with the ones I love." Mom looked down at me and smiled.
"Dig in, there will be dancing later!" she added when the waiters came rushing into the room.
And we all did. During the dinner, the conversations around the room were light, meaningless subjects were discussed, gossip exchanged. Suddenly Babette directed her attention to me.
"Rory, doll." She yelled from across the table. Silently I sighed; this woman just couldn't keep he voice down.
"Yeah, Babette?" I feared the worst.
"Where's that boyfriend of yours? The blond fox." She elbowed Miss Patty in the ribs.
"Yeah, Rory, he was real eye candy." I could feel the heat rise in my head, blushing I tried to come up with an answer.
"Well, unfortunately, we're not together anymore." I finally said, feeling that honesty might be the best way out. Babette and Miss Patty gasped in sync.
"Oh, doll, I'm sorry to hear that. Well, he didn't deserve you anyhow, right, Patty?" again she elbowed Miss Patty.
"Yes, it's a shame. You could make better." I wanted to laugh out loud at that comment, at how ridiculous this all seemed. I excused myself and got up, just as Miss Patty and Babette started interrogating Jess. I could feel his gaze follow me, as I opened the big front door and walked outside.
Once outside, I took a deep breath and sat down on the steps taking in my surroundings. It was full moon and the garden around the inn was beautifully lit by it. The trees seemed green even at night, and I could hear the swans quacking in the back, as if they were chatting with each other and I couldn't help but chuckle at how similar they seemed to Babette and Miss Patty. I heard the door open and footsteps approaching. Once again his scent gave him away, as he sat down next to me, stretching his feet.
"It's beautiful here." He whispered and I shivered at his voice.
"Yeah, it is." I whispered just as quietly. Long silence.
I felt like this was my opportunity, my chance to make things right. Take it or leave it, I silently repeated in my head all over again.
"I'm sorry for yelling at you earlier. I didn't mean to upset you." I could fell Jess take in a deep breath.
"So, are we having the conversation now?" I turned my head and looked at him. He was starring straight ahead or so it seemed, but when I took a closer look, I could see that his eyes were closed. I was afraid to ask the question that was on the tip of my tongue.
"What conversation?" My voice was barely above a whisper. A deep intake of breath.
"About us." I closed my eyes as well, trying to maintain my composure.
"Is there an us?" nearly inaudible words came from my mouth as if I was afraid to say them out loud. I could see Jess tilt his head, shrugging his shoulders.
"You tell me!" silent tears were now streaming down my face as I tried to come up with something to say.
"I just broke up with my boyfriend." I chose to get it all out of my system.
"So I heard." Simple statement, he wasn't judging me.
"You're not over him?" he added and I noticed the insecurity in his voice. I stiffed a chuckle.
"I am so over him." Jess nodded and didn't question my answer.
"I'm scared." I repeated my words from earlier. Instantly Jess turned around, locking his eyes with mine, never breaking the contact. I could feel the heat radiating from his body as I noticed the movements of his chest. In….out….in…out. His breathing calmed me down.
"Scared of what?" this time I decided to be brave.
"Of what you make me feel." I could see in his eyes that he hadn't expected this answer, as his face became readable all of a sudden. Was it hope? Not a split second after, his face was blank again.
"What do I make you feel?" He inquired as he so desperately needed an answer, something he could work with.
"You make my legs go weak." I swallowed never breaking eye contact.
"You make my heart beat faster." He leaned forward.
"You make me feel things I have never felt before." He came even closer.
"You make me feel thing I hadn't thought I was capable of." Finally he rested his forehead against mine. I felt his breath on my face, drying my tears before they could reach my lips.
"I'm scared too." He closed his eyes.
"I am to damn scared of what's happening with me." his voice sounded sincere, but at the same time broken. I chuckled nervously.
"I don't even know you. I've known you for what? Two weeks?" Jess slightly shook his head, still touching my forehead.
"This is not about knowing the other's favorite ice cream brand, this is not about knowing the other's favorite color." He swallowed, continuing.
"This is about feelings, emotions. This is about the sparks, the moments when you think that maybe this could be it." I suddenly felt ridiculous.
"I don't wanna rush into things." I almost inaudibly expressed my fears.
"We don't have to rush into things, let's take it slow; let's get to know each other. Let's be friends." Friends? I didn't know if I was capable of being friends with him. But I nodded not wanting to miss this opportunity.
"And when we'd realize we can't stand each other on daily routine, we still will be glad that we tried it." He had taken the upper hand in this conversation, making my doubts go away, making my head spin at the prospect of the possibilities.
"Okay!" I opened my eyes just to see his lips lift up in a slight grin.
"Okay!" he confirmed, squeezing my hand that I hadn't noticed he had taken hold of.
I laughed out loud, suddenly feeling liberated. The demons in my chest finally calmed down.
"okay." I once again repeated and closed my eyes once again, enjoying his closeness.
"so." He softly pulled back and I couldn't help but feel cold at the loss of his skin on mine.
"You'd like to dance with a friend?" My eyes grew wide as I scanned his face, searching for any hint of sarcasm. I found none. I nodded as he pulled me up and wrapped an arm around my waist, giving me a quick peck on my head while doing so.
During this night at the Inn, I actually learned a lot about him. I could tell that he hated socializing, I could tell that he hated gossip, I could tell that he loved Luke in a weird twisted way, I could tell that he expressed himself with his eyes instead of using ambiguous words, I could tell that the openness we had shared earlier would be a rare occurrence but most importantly I realized that maybe we could make this work.
So? What do you think? I had a hard time writing this chapter and I'm dying to find out what you think about it. Jess seems to be out of character, but I wanted him to be the one finally opening up. Please review, I haven't gotten many reviews for the last chapter. Just tell me what you think, even flames are appreciated! Thanks for reading!