Sorry for the delay, but I had so much going on in my life, anyhow thank you for your reviews, I was and still am totally overwhelmed by the response I'm getting.
Disclaimer (which I forgot the last couple of chapters): friends call me Amy, of course I own them :-) anyhow, what do you guys think about Amy and Dan abandoning their baby? Actually I am a bit scared, but we will see.
In this chapter I'm gonna introduce Liz, she may come off as the total freak, but I am portraying her after my ex´s mother. I hate it when they wanna be your best friend just because you're dating their son. Read, maybe even enjoy and please review, I haven't gotten many for the last chapter, but I am glad people are still reading.
Rory´s POV:
"Jess?" I asked as we were lying on his old, worn couch, snuggling into each other so that we would both fit on it. Not that I minded the closeness.
"Hmm?" he lazily replied while stroking my stomach. It was Friday and we had just gotten out of class and Jess had this weird habit of taking a nap afterwards.
"Let's go to Stars Hollow." I could feel him tense up so I took his hand off my stomach and intertwined our fingers, stroking the back of his hand lightly.
"No?" It was more a statement than a question. My other hand traveled down his thigh, resting just above his knee.
"Please?" I begged; I wanted him to tag along. I had told mom about us, but I wanted her to see us together, I wanted to show her just how happy Jess made me. It would mean a lot to me. I started rubbing his knee.
"You can keep rubbing my thigh as long as you want, I'm not going." I pouted and withdrew my hand from his body.
"Why not?" I asked, wanting to know why the hell he wouldn't wanna go.
"Because." Was his childish answer, but I wouldn't give in.
"Because why?" Jess sat up and took me with him.
"Because I hate to be judged by people who don't even know me." I looked him in the eye and sighed.
"No one's gonna judge you, Jess." He snorted instead of giving a reply.
"Come on, it might be fun." Jess closed his eyes for a second and took a deep breath.
"This is fun." As if to underline his statement, he pulled me closer to his body and leaned in, kissing my neck softly.
I tried to pull away, but he was holding me too tightly; I sighed into his mouth and kissed him back. It was as if I just couldn't resist him. I explored his mouth, trailing my tongue along his teeth.
A content moan escaped my mouth and Jess pulled back.
"See!" he stated and smirked at me.
"This is fun." He added and captured my lips once again.
"We can have fun in Stars Hollow, too, you know." I could see the doubt in his eyes, and maybe something that resembled defeat. I got up suddenly and grabbed my bag from the floor.
I headed to the door and turned around once again, smiling.
"I'm gonna pick you up in an hour, have your stuff packed, we're staying overnight." Jess shook his head and mumbled something under his breath that vaguely sounded like.
"What have I gotten myself into?
Exactly an hour later I was once again standing in Jess's apartment. He had a duffel bag slung over his shoulder and a scowl on his face.
I walked over to him and beamed.
"Have I ever told you how sexy you are when you're scowling?" I whispered suggestively in his ear and pecked him quickly on the lips. He let the duffel bag fall from his shoulder and pulled me closer to his body. Well, an hour later wouldn't hurt, right? With that thought in mind I led him into his bedroom, unbuttoning his shirt on the way, never breaking the kiss.
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We arrived in Stars Hollow two hours later than I had intended and headed straight to the diner, where as I had thought, Mom was sitting at the counter, nursing a cup of coffee, talking to Luke in excitement.
The bell above the door announced our arrival as Jess and I entered the diner holding hands. His hair was a mess and I was sure everybody in here could tell what we had been doing.
"Offspring of mine, how much have I missed you?" Mom exclaimed and I let go off Jess's hands to greet my mom.
"I expected you to be here two hours ago." Mom said with a smile on her face.
"I got distracted." I whispered and blushed slightly as mom looked over to where Jess was standing.
"Ah, I see. So everything's good, huh?" I couldn't help but smile as I mumbled under my breath, still trying to make the blush go away.
"Very good indeed." Jess came over to us and sat down next to me at the counter.
"Hey, Lorelai." He greeted my mom and I begged mom silently to not say a word.
"Hey, Jess. Glad you could make it." He shook his head.
"As if I had the chance." He replied and despite the sound of his voice he couldn't hide the smirk that was appearing on his face.
"That's the Gilmore charm, my friend. Try to get used to it." Mom said nonchalantly and sipped her coffee.
Suddenly Luke appeared from behind the curtain, flushed and slightly angry. I looked at him curiously and asked for a cup of coffee.
"Hey, Rory I didn't see you there." He replied distracted and poured me a cup of coffee avoiding my eyes, then he directed his attention to Jess.
"Hey, Jess. Coffee?" I looked surprised at mom and leaned over to whisper in her ear.
"What's wrong with him? Giving me coffee without arguing, and I swear he is avoiding my eyes." Mom giggled.
"He still thinks you're a kid and he's not very comfortable with you and Jess. I told him about how you two have met." I again blushed and slapped mom playfully on the back.
"Mom!" I exclaimed but I knew there was no point of being upset.
"Plus, he's got a visitor, two actually who he is not very fond of apparently." She added and that got my interest. Before I could inquire any further, the curtain that hid the stairs leading up to the small apartment above was pushed away and a woman about forty came into view. She had blond hair and was about my height. She went behind the counter and followed Luke around.
"Come on, bro. This is gonna be fun. Like a family reunion." Bro? Was she Luke's sister? That meant…
I heard Jess take a deep breath next to me and I thought I heard him whisper something under his breath. "Fleet or fight? Fleet or fight?"
"Lorelai, tell him that this is gonna be fun. The four of us having dinner. You, Luke, T.J. and…." She trailed off, her eyes wide open, apparently she had spotted Jess who had made no move of indicating that he was here as well.
"Jess, my boy!" She exclaimed and ran over to him, pulling him into a hug.
"I had no idea that you were coming, what are you doing here anyway? Man, this is fate! I knew that something magical was gonna happen today. I knew it. T.J. knew it as well." She still didn't let go off Jess and finally he returned the gesture and hugged her back.
"T.J.?" was all that Jess got out. His expression blank, his usual self. The woman that apparently was indeed Jess's mother pulled back.
"T.J. My man, he's the one. I swear, you're gonna like him. He's great." I wondered silently where Jess had gotten his lack of communication from; it definitely wasn't from his mom. I observed Jess as his jaw tensed and the way he put his hands into his pockets made me wonder what was going on between the two of them. I felt for him as he sat there, starring right ahead, expression blank and maybe hurt? I wanted to touch him so badly, to let him know that I was here, to comfort him, but I didn't dare.
"Huh!" was Jess's only reply. Silence settled around us and I could feel that his mother seemed to be hurt by his lack of emotions. It was my mom who finally broke the silence.
"Liz, this is my daughter Rory. Rory this is Liz, Luke's sister and Jess's mom." I politely extended my hands, suddenly at unease having to meet my boyfriend's mother so unexpectedly.
"Rory, of course." She exclaimed and I wondered if she knew about me and Jess as she pulled me into a hug.
"Shaking hands? Nonsense, we are a family, after all, you mother is gonna be my sister in law." Okay, so she didn't know about my relationship with Jess. I wondered when the last time that Jess had talked to her was. They didn't seem to know much of each other's lives.
"Yeah." I mumbled and looked over to Jess who just shrugged his shoulders.
"Oh, Rory how about you and Jess join us tonight? Wouldn't this be fun?" Luke took this as his sign to butter in.
"Liz, we haven't even agreed on having dinner tonight, she just got back from college, maybe she wants to spend some time with her mom." Liz seemed to contemplate about this.
"So you and your mom are close, huh?" I couldn't help but notice the sad sound of her voice. I nodded my head.
"Yeah, but I think, dinner is a great idea, my mom and I can catch up later." I didn't know why I said that but something inside if me snapped, maybe Jess and his mom should spend some time together. I looked down, knowing exactly that I had gotten myself into trouble when I had agreed on having dinner, because when I looked up four faces where starring at me. One understanding, one happy, one disbelieving and one angry. Liz clapped her hands.
"It's a date then. I can't wait telling T.J. about this." She turned around and disappeared behind the curtain.
Jess got up and went after her, without looking at me once again. I shook my head sadly, I didn't even know their history and yet I had interfered. Mom took a deep breath.
"So meeting the mother of your boyfriend, huh? Is it just me or did Jess not seem to be too happy about this?"
"She doesn't even know we're dating, so this night might be the night of surprises." I replied and had this huge weight on my shoulder. Why couldn't I just have shut up?
Mom patted my back.
"He will get over it." She reassuringly told me and I couldn't help but wish that she was right.
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My mom and went back to our house with the promise to Luke that we wouldn't leave him alone for too long with Liz and that we would indeed show up tonight.
I tried calling Jess's cell phone but all I got was his voicemail telling me to try again later. I was sitting restless on the couch and decided to take a short walk before dinner.
My feet led me to the bridge, the bridge where I had spent most of my childhood days, reading, thinking and listening to music. When I got there I saw that my usual spot was already taken. Smoke was filling the air and I saw Jess's small frame sitting on the old wood, his feet dangling over the edge.
Silently I sat down next to him, not saying a word; my eyes followed the smoke that he exhaled.
"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have agreed. I don't even know…." Jess cut me off, looked at me and said.
"I'm sorry, too. I shouldn't have left you like this. It's just…" He swallowed and threw the cigarette into the lake.
"It's just that Liz and I don't have the nicest history. I was angry at her for showing up like this and I was angry at you for taking her side."
"I didn't take her side, Jess. I wasn't even thinking. I'm sorry." Jess shook his head.
"Don't be. It is what it is." I took a deep breath and continued my thought.
"You wanna talk about it?" Jess looked at me and silently shook his head no once again.
"No, not yet anyway." I accepted his answer and convinced myself that he would talk to me when he'd be ready.
Suddenly he got up and pulled me with him; he buried his head into my hair and inhaled deeply.
"We should get going, huh? " He whispered into my hair, took my hand and led me to the diner, his left arm wrapped around me protectively.
Before he opened the door, he stopped and looked at me seriously.
"Don't tell me I didn't warn you." I nodded and squeezed his hand tightly. With a deep breath, Jess pushed open the door and for once I couldn't help but think that the bell above the door sounded scary.
Liz greeted us with a happy smile on her face.
"Here you are, Jess and I thought you'd bail on me." Jess starred right ahead.
"Wouldn't even dream of it, Liz." Suddenly Liz's eyes became wide again as she noticed our intertwined hands. She gasped and choked.
"Oh my god, are you two an item? I didn't know that." She exclaimed and I couldn't help but smile at her genuine happiness. Jess on the other hand tensed up but still held tightly on to my hand.
"There are many things you don't know about me, mom." He replied sarcastically and it was obvious to everyone in the room that he used the word "mom" pretty ironically. Well, except maybe T.J.
He came over to where we were standing, shook Jess's hand and kissed my hand in an exaggerating manner.
"I have heard quite some things about you. She surely talks a lot about you." Jess just shrugged his shoulders and sat down at the already set table joining Luke and my mom. Mom looked at me curiously, but I just nodded and sat down as well.
The tension during dinner was palpable, forced conversations, but T.J. seemed to be oblivious as he was enjoying his food. The rest of us though were barely eating let alone talking.
Somewhere around desert Liz directed her attention to me.
"So where have you two met?" I swallowed my last piece of apple pie and put my fork down, looking over to Jess as if I wanted his okay. He just nodded slightly and kept eating.
"Well, we met at Yale. I'm going there as well" Liz beamed at her son, proudly.
"So, you got in, huh? Your father had told me that you applied. This is great, my kid in an ivy league school." I was stunned; Liz didn't even know that Jess went to Yale? I exchanged glances with my mom and suddenly I felt so blessed to have such an amazing relationship with her.
"How long have you two been together then? Man, I can't believe you didn't tell me about this, Luke." Luke looked at her disbelievingly.
When I was about to answer, Jess cut me off.
"A couple of weeks." Simple statement.
"That's nice." Liz replied and smiled at me.
"He's quite a handful, huh?" I choked on my wine.
"I remember when he was younger, hanging out with the wrong kids. But I guess he has told you all about it, right? "All of a sudden I felt uncomfortable.
"oho." I mumbled under my breath and stole a piece of pie from my mom's plate.
"Has he told you about this phase in his life when I had to bail him out of jail at least twice a month? " Jess stopped eating and gave his mom a loaded glance.
"You mean the phase in my life when you were too fucking drunk or stoned or high or whatever to give a damn about me?" Liz stopped eating and looked at him. Everyone in this room felt like disappearing, except T.J. who laughed slightly.
"This was along time ago, Jess. I have changed. No one needs to hear about that." Jess snorted.
"How about the time when I came home and everything was gone? The TV, the microwave, hell even the CDs, what about the time when I got home from school and found you passed out on the couch? I thought you were dead, Liz, until you started throwing up, at least then I knew you were alive. No one wants to hear about that either, right? I mean blame the kid, he's the screw up!" Jess was yelling right now and I was feeling so bad, I haven´t ever felt so bad in my whole life. My heart was aching for Jess and at the same time I knew he wouldn't want that. Suddenly Jess stopped, apparently noticing where he was. He ran a hand through his hair and stopped in his tracks. He looked at me apologetically and left the diner in a hurry.
Luke looked as if he was about to die, mom occupied her hands with the napkin, Liz had tears in her eyes and I was sitting there motionless, only T.J. didn't seem to be thrown at all by what had just happened. Mom shot me a glance and motioned with her head that I should follow Jess. So I did, I got up mumbled thanks under my breath and ran out of the door.
It was already dark outside but instinctively I went to the bridge and there he was sitting at the exact same spot as he had before, trying to light a cigarette. Slowly I made my way over to him and sat down.
Jess breathed irregularly and I could tell that he was fighting with his anger. He was hurt. He had been hurt. I didn't touch him, I didn't say a word, I just sat there letting him be.
"You know, I had been quite a happy kid while growing up. I was doing well in school, read a lot. My mom would take me to the zoo ever so often, she insisted on bringing me to school every morning, since we weren't living in the nicest neighborhood. I was careless. Then she started dating that guy and slowly things had changed. She didn't bring me to school anymore, told me that I was a big boy now. The zoo? Scratch that, after all I was a big boy. The zoo is something for kids. After some time she didn't wake me up in the morning any more. Her boyfriend gave me an alarm clock and told me to get up on my own that I didn't need my mother anymore. I was ten."
He swallowed, shook his head and laughed ironically. I still didn't say a word; I had the feeling that he had to get it all out of his system.
"The only thing that didn't change was that I was still doing well in school. I had thought that if I was a good boy, attending school and everything that my mom would somehow notice it and you know start caring again. I guess I was wrong. By the time I was eleven my mom nearly spent every night at the guy's apartment and I had to take care of myself. I started hanging out with the wrong kids; I started drinking, doing drugs, no heavy things, but well, smoking weed and stuff like that. One day I got home from school and surprisingly my mom was home, she was sitting on the couch, crying. She told me that that guy dumped her and that it had been my fault, because I was being such a bad kid. I felt bad at the beginning, but somehow I realized that I couldn't make her happy anymore, so I started a life on my own. I didn't want to end like her, I know it sounds harsh, but I wanted something better out of my life. I excluded her from my life and the minute I had the chance I took it. That's why I spent a year with my grandparents in Italy. I guess there I learned again what it felt like to be welcome. I thought a lot about my mom and about how she'd cope with me not being around, I even kinda forgave her. When I got back to the US, I stayed with my dad, but I started calling her again. I so desperately wanted her to know that I didn't hate her, but I don't know…."
He trailed off and dropped his head, swallowing hard. I felt the tears streaming down my face; I hadn't even noticed that I had started crying. I silently wiped them away; I didn't want him to see me cry not after what he had told me. A sob threatened to escape my mouth, but I pressed my lips firmly together.
"It seems as if her life is back on track and I wish I could show her that I am happy for her, but I just couldn't. Everything was boiling up inside of me and I just couldn't show her that I still care." He wrapped an arm around my shoulder and pressed my body tightly against his. I buried my head in his chest and cried openly.
"Talk to her." I whispered and squeezed his hand.
"Tell her exactly what you have told me." My voice was barely audible as I tried to comfort him. I felt him shake his head.
"Maybe I should." I nodded and pulled back slightly, so that my face was barely an inch away from his. I felt his hot breath on my lips as I leaned in and pecked him on the lips.
"I love you." I hadn't even realized that I had opened my mouth to say something. I blushed furiously but he couldn't see it because I buried my head once again in his chest, not because I was embarrassed by my confession but because I wanted him to feel me when I said it.
"I don't want you to take this the wrong way, I don't pity you, Jess. I love you." He kissed my forehead tenderly and lifted up my chin so that he could look me in the eye.
"I love you, Rory." His voice was so soft that I couldn't help but cry even harder. The sobs were escaping my throat more frequently now and I started hiccupping.
Jess smirked at me and whispered.
"Not the reaction I would have wished for but okay." I chuckled, still hiccupping and hugged him even tighter, in my mind I wondered why it was that I haven't been happier before in my whole life.
Please don't shoot me, I know Jess is extremely out of character, but I wanted him to open up, to make Rory part of his past. He seemed too vulnerable, but please notice that I didn't make him cry! Lol Anyhow, review please and tell me if the I love you´s were too rushed, I just thought that it fit. Trust me I won't make them say I love you every single day, because I think this is very special and if you say it too often it looses its meaning!