Ingredients to Your Living Hell

Chapter Five: Itachi, I hate you!

Terrible god damn mother fucking bitch ass shitty headaches; oh how I hated hangovers and being stoned. Did you ever wonder what SAT means? It means stoned and totaled; that's what it means.

I was lying in a bed when I woke up. Strangely I thought I was supposed to be outside. Even stranger, why the hell was Itachi wearing make up? His face was covered in white and purple paint. Haha, that's funny.

I sat up even though my brain was racking in pain. Hey, that rhymes. Well yeah, I looked around Itachi's room and saw Kisame sleeping against a wall mumbling something about anchovy pizza and coke. Did they even have coke in this time? Well he could be talking about cocaine.

I looked around the room for Itachi and didn't find him. That was strange. I suddenly felt something pull me back down on the mattress. I gave squeak as I found myself in the arms of a psycho killer…in his bed…wearing his shirt for some odd reason. I frowned and thought silently, 'WHAT THE FUCK!'

He buried his head in the crock of my neck and mumbled something about evil pink bunnies. (0.o) I cursed him and thought, 'I want fucking out of his arms now!'

Then…I felt him kiss my neck. He left little love marks and I was just about to kill him when he murmured, "You taste like strawberries." My face looked like this. 0.0

What the mother fucking hell was he doing! ARG! I tried to shove him off me, which only led to me and him rolling onto the to the ground with a

THUD!

He landed on top of me while straddling my waist. I frowned even more when my hands were pinned above my head. I thrashed, struggled, even tried to bite him, but I couldn't get out of his damned grasp. I huffed and growled at him.

He let out an uncharacteristic chuckle and leaned closer to me. A smirked was on his lips and he whispered in my ear, "I like strawberries," and nipped my earlobe. I struggled and hissed out, "Let me go, or I'll make sure you never have ki-!" well I was finishing my sentence, but he rudely interrupted me by harshly kissing me.

Again with the kissing, what was with him and kissing me! Oh well, I bit him. Muahahaha! Yes, I bit his tongue. He pulled back at the pain and glared at me will he lick his lips.

I glared at him triumphantly and said, "Kiss my ass you fucker."

He looked at me and then said, "I'd rather fuck you." I had no idea if he was kidding or not, but still, I gagged. Then flipping our positions, I glared down at him and said, "No way are you ever fucking touching me again."

I got up off him and left the room. 'Stupid conceited asshole.' I thought angrily. I didn't know where the hell I was going, but I eventually stormed outside. Then stormed even father and farther until I was utterly lost in the woods….

Again

I looked around the woods and walked around and around and around. This was totally pointless. I finally realized that, a, I was wearing Itachi's clothes (His black pants that hung loosely on my waist and his black mesh shirt thing.), and b I was walking around the woods where I could get killed.

Hours later…

I let out a very loud and very banshee like scream.

"ARGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG! FUCK YOU ITACHI! FUCK YOU AND YOUR DAMN STUPID ASSHOLE NESS!"

I let out a furious cry and punch the nearest thing to my right.

"OUCH!"

I shrieked and fell back. There standing in front of me was a boy about thirteen or so wearing a lot of orange. His blonde hair was spiky and mess and his eyes were an electric blue. I blinked a few times at him with my 'red' eyes and then asked frustratingly, "Who the fucking hell are you!"

Well I actually kind of screamed it, but same difference. I stared at him and then screamed, "WELL! WHO THE HECK ARE YOU!"

He cringed in fear and gulped. "N-Na-Naruto…"

He whispered quietly. I had no time to deal with this kind of crap so I growled at him and glared at him with my pretty red eyes. I stood up, turned around and met the point of a kunai. I yelped again and fell down again. In front of me was a man with silver hair that looked all floppy with a kunai in hand. Behind him was furious looking kid who looked a lot like Itachi, and a girl with pink hair and green eyes. I stared at them and mumbled some cuss words. All of a sudden I totally remembered my terrible hangover and grabbed my head saying, "Fuck that damn fucker and his fucking stupid ass sake. Damn him to hell!"

I glared at the man with silver hair and yelled out, "LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE! ALL I WANT TO DO NOW IS DRINK TEQUILA AND GO HOME! JAIL WAS EVEN BETTER THAN THIS HELL HOLE!"

The silver haired man blinked at me and then looked to the blonde kid who I forgot was behind me asked, "Did she do anything to you Naruto?"

Naruto shook his head and then grinned, "She just kind of made me deaf with her voice."

SNAP!

There goes me temper. I stood up abruptly and turned myself to the blonde boy.

"Don't you dare piss me off kid. I am in the worst mood possible and still on hangover." I hissed at the boy who was slowly backing up while I was storming towards him.

"Do you just happen to know how much shit I've been through since I came here? I was kidnapped by two, not one, but two freaking crazy psycho killers, and then one of them licked me! That's just uber disgusting. Then I was brought back to a freakin' lair and locked up in a room where I had nothing to do except destroy his room and count my weed! THEN! He has the nerve to kiss me and then insult me! WHAT THE FUCK IS UP WITH THAT! AND MOREOVER HE FREAKIN' MOLESTED ME FOR CHRIST'S SAKE! DAMN YOU ITACHI!"

Well, finally calming down, I looked at Naruto who was cowering in fear. I glared at him and then turned to the silver haired dude and screamed, "EVEN WORSE, I KEEP MEETING WEIRDOS AND PSYCHOS!"

I pointed an accusing finger at him. The boy with black hair from behind the silver haired dude disappeared suddenly. I blinked several times and then thought, 'Where the hell did he go?'

I soon found myself on the forest ground, on my stomach, my hands pinned to my back, and a pointy thingy at my neck.

"Meep!"

"Where is he?"

That stupid boy was now sitting on my and I was just about as pissed as ever.

"OFF ME NOW! GET OFF GET OFF GET OFF!"

I was shrieking like a banshee and then I used my leg, and being my flexible and very limber self, I kicked him in the back of the head.

He fell of me, and was stopped by the silver haired dude who held his wrist to prevent him from throwing the pointy thing at me and/or charging at me with it.

I glared at him and then yelled, "LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE! WHY WON'T ANYONE JUST LET ME GO HOME! I MISS MIKEY, I MISS MY FUCKING PARENTS, AND MOST OF ALL I FUCKING MISS MY DAMN BED AND TEQUILA! I WANT TO GO MOTHER FUCKING HOME!"

I ended up sobbing like a crazed maniac on the forest floor and whining about alcohol.

Then I sat up and yelled at the top of my lungs,

"ITACHI, YOU MOTHER FUCKING BITCH ASS RAT SHIT BASTARD; I'M GOING TO FUCKING KILL YOU! I FRIGGEN HATE YOU!"

---

Yes! I have now finished the fifth chapter! C: this is just pointless comedy. Hehe, anyways, can you guess who the people are? xD anyways, anyone who totally loves my stories, can read 'Mercenary's Life.' I just posted it like a day or two ago, so go read it and leave me reviews! C:

I'll love you even more.

I have this story idea and I'll eventually submit it when I'm not so lazy. Anyways, I also have a fan fic recommendation, either read, "The Scheme" by kimbop OR read any and all of Blackbelt's stories. Love her work.

S2 bunny