Title: Missions
Series: Let it Flow
Author: Sevangel
Disclaimer: Not mine
Rating: R (this is a bit dark, darker than I normally write)
-
Mal props his feet up on the console, staring out into the vast nothingness in front of him. Serenity's quiet, as she should be, the rest of the crew sleeping peacefully. He'd woken up bout half an hour ago and unable to go back to sleep decided to check their progress. Not an unusual occurrence, not since Early's visit. Between him, Zoe, and Jayne, the ship was protected at all hours. He ain't havin' someone else sneakin' onto his boat, into his home. Like a thorn in his side, it still irks him to no end that the bounty hunter was able to get on his ship without no one knowin' but River. Shouldn't have happened, he survived the war without unknowingly bein' ambushed. Now, every little sound he hears at night, makes him alert, his pistol held strong in his hand. Someone else tries sneakin' on Serenity, he's gonna know.
"She's safe." River whispers.
Mal spins around, gun drawn to point directly between the girl's eyes. She just stares at it, her head cocked slightly to the side. "Gorramit, little witch, don't you know better than to sneak up on an armed man?" Mal growls, lowering the pistol.
"She would have stopped you before you shot her." River replies. She walks over to plop down into the co-pilot's chair, a pad of drawing paper and a box of pencils held in her hand.
Mal holsters his gun before looking over at the genius. "What're ya doin' up at this hour?" Mal questions. "Do I need to go get your brother?"
River tilts her head to rake her eyes over him. "She sees no injuries." River replies. "Are you not feeling well?"
"I'm fine." Mal answers. "I meant you."
"She's fine." River says. "Just not tired. Besides, Simon's dreams were keeping her awake. She likes Kaylee but doesn't want to see her like Simon does."
"You can see into our dreams?" Mal questions, uncomfortable with the idea. Most the things he dreams bout aren't meant for little girls to see.
"Not a little girl." River growls. "Okay, she is little and she is a girl but she isn't a child. And yes, she can see into dreams but most of the time doesn't. But Simon's dreams were too bright and fluffy; made her head hurt. She doesn't like his dreams. Or Kaylee's. Always feels dirty after leaving."
"Why's that?" Mal questions.
"Too clean." River replies. "Too much sunshine and happiness. Much too bright. She prefers the darkness."
Mal doesn't know what to say to that so he doesn't say anything. Girl shouldn't prefer death and destruction to sunshine and happiness. Don't seem right.
"You should sleep." River comments, cocking her head at him again. "Your exhaustion coats your skin like a shawl. Serenity's safe; nobody's around for thousands of miles. We are very much alone out here."
"I said that before and look what happened." Mal replies. "You should be sleeping too."
"She doesn't need much sleep." River says. "Sometimes she pretends to make Simon feel better; he worries too much."
"Yeah, as he should." Mal replies. "Ya know, think this is the first time we've talked without you confusin' the ruttin' hell outa me."
"Things are quiet up here." River says, pointing to her head. "She can block most of the thoughts now, no longer tumbling around, trying to find herself."
"Your brother finally found his cure?" Mal questions.
"There is no cure to make her what she was before." River answers. "River Tam, the River Tam that Simon is trying so hard to find, is dead. She died a long time ago. Nothing will bring her back. Simon hasn't accepted that but she has."
"Ya ain't dead, little witch." Mal says slowly.
"You're silly, captain." River giggles. "Of course she's not dead. She's sitting right in front of you. But she isn't the same girl that she was and she never will be. Too much was taken out and too much put back in. She will always be..different. No amount of drugs or time is going to change that. But she isn't broken anymore. Just a little cracked."
"If the drugs didn't fix you, what did?" Mal asks, understanding what she means. The little sister that Simon is trying to bring back is gone. Just like the man he used to be is.
"She isn't sure if you want to know." River replies. "She's never told anyone; Simon would be upset or scared. He's already sacrificed too much for her, she won't break him too."
"Is it somethin' bad?" Mal questions.
"Depends on how you look at it." River replies. She studies him for a few minutes, her head cocked as though she's reading his mind.
"Gorramit, I don't want you readin' my mind." Mal growls.
"She's not." River assures. "Not in the sense that you're thinking. The mind is like a book; a large, endless chapter book with no index. She's just glancing at the cover, the same way you do."
"I don't read minds." Mal replies.
"Body language." River states. "You read people to see if they're a threat or not, if they can be trusted. You're decent at it, Inara and Book are better, both being trained to do it. She's just making sure you won't tell. She won't read minds, unless she has to. A person's mind is a private thing and she has no right to be there. It would be no different than rape."
"Tell who?" Mal asks.
"Simon." River answers. "And Kaylee. She doesn't want Simon to know, not now. Maybe once he's happy and secure with Kaylee, then she'll tell him. But if he finds out now, he'll just push everyone away. And Kaylee is too pure. She sees the good in everyone; she doesn't need to know how bad people really are. It would dampen the sunshine."
"Yeah." Mal agrees. "Kaylee's always been like that, don't know how, though. Livin' like we do, she should know people ain't nice."
"She will tell you the story of how she came to be, but you have to promise not to tell Simon or Kaylee." River says.
"How do ya know I'll keep my word?" Mal questions.
"You will." River answers. "Because you agree with her."
Mal nods.
River stands up and moves in front of him. "Pinkie swear." River says, holding her pinkie out to the highly amused captain.
Mal laughs but hooks his pinkie into hers and gives it a good shake. River smiles brightly at him before moving back to her chair.
"Alright, little witch, let's hear this story." Mal orders.
"You remember when she first got here." River says. "How she was."
"That ain't a sight I think I'll ever forget." Mal replies. "And yes, I remember how you was all crazy."
"Not crazy." River corrects. "Not really. She crawled out of that box and was covered in thoughts. It took a while to clear the fuzz from her brain and really see what was around her."
"That's it?" Mal questions. "That's the story?"
"No, that's the beginning." River replies. "When the fuzz cleared, like it always did, she started looking around for her mission; why she was here. But no matter how hard she searched, she never found it. Sometimes it made her upset and sometimes it made her violent."
"Mission?" Mal prods.
"She thought this," River gestures around herself, "was a simulation. Something the academy made; a test of sorts. They did it before. Got deep into her mind and set up fake environments for her to fight her way out of. She would have to discover what her mission was or wait until she was attacked and then fight her way out. But there was no mission that she could find, no purpose. She thought she found it once but was wrong."
"When?" Mal questions.
"The Reaver ship." River answers. "That's why she left Serenity and walked onto the Reaver ship. She thought that was her mission but they were all dead; there was nothing left to fight."
"You thought you was supposed to fight Reavers?" Mal gasps.
"She's done it before." River replies. "The academy would sedate her and then plant stuff in her head; they put her on Reaver ships before and she would fight until she defeated them all or until they killed her. Then she would wake up and they would do something else."
"Killed you?" Mal growls. "How?"
"You know how Reavers kill, captain." River replies.
"So these were like dreams?" Mal asks quietly.
"No, not dreams." River answers. "It's different than dreams; have you ever played a virtual reality game?"
"Yeah." Mal replies. "When I was a kid."
"They were like that." River answers. "It was like being there; she could feel every blow, every cut, every touch. She felt everything."
Mal's not real sure he wants to hear the rest of this, cause right now he feels like killin' somethin' and just wonders if it gets worse or better. The fact that she hadn't cut on herself and killed every gorram one of em just shows how ruttin' strong she is.
"Once she realized that Reavers weren't her mission, she went back to searching." River continues, pushing out the rage Mal is feeling. "The more time that passed the more confused she got. Nobody was attacking her, not even the big one. He would growl at her but never attacked. And everyone treated her nice, tried to protect her. She couldn't handle that because that just meant when the mission finally came out, she'd have to either kill them all or watch them all die. She didn't want to. As much as she tried to tell herself it was just a mission, just a test, she couldn't stop herself from caring about them. So, then she started thinking that maybe the test was her being able to hurt people she cared about. She didn't want to hurt anybody on Serenity but she couldn't stay in the simulation any longer. So, she decided to test it. She figured if she attacked one of the crewmembers then everyone would attack her and she could get out. But part of her wondered if maybe she was wrong, if maybe that wasn't the test. She calculated all the odds and came to the conclusion that attacking the large one would be the safest route. If it was a test, then everyone would try to kill her; if it wasn't, she knew he could take the attack, that he would strike back, but ultimately wouldn't be any worse for wear. So, she slashed his chest and he hit her back, just like she predicted. But nobody else attacked her; in fact, everyone else defended her. She was back to square one."
"You attacked Jayne hopin' that we'd try and kill you?" Mal questions.
"Yes." River answers. "But not even Jayne would try to kill her. He hit her, not because it was her, but because it is his natural reaction to strike out when attacked. It's her reaction too."
"And if we had tried to kill ya?" Mal questions.
"Then she would have finished the mission." River answers. "That's what she does."
"You don't still think this is all a mission, do you?" Mal questions.
"No." River answers. "She knows she's not in the academy now; she learned that on Ariel."
"This bout what Jayne did?" Mal asks.
"Yes." River answers. "He woke her up. When they were captured, she could feel the hands of blue coming. As they escaped, she finally realized that it wasn't a simulation. The blue hands observe the missions; they would never be in it. When she felt them, she knew it was real, that she was out of the academy. She didn't feel alive then but she knew, she knew in her gut and in her brain, that she wasn't lost in her own mind anymore. Then she had to try and figure out what that meant; what it meant to be free, to not be an experiment. It was hard because she never thought she would get free; she knew Simon would try to get her. She wrote him coded letters but never really thought he'd be able to do it."
"What was the point of those missions?" Mal questions.
"Research." River answers. "See how much they could learn from her brain. She has a very unique brain and they tried to mold it into their liking. Cut a bit here, snip a bit here and she'd become the perfect weapon. But she needed training, needed to learn to fight against unbeatable odds."
"When you'd figure out what it means?" Mal questions. "When'd you start feeling alive?"
"Early." River answers. "As much as she'd like to deny it, being given a mission, one in real life, one that wasn't in her head did what no drug ever could do. Made her feel alive. It's rather ironic; she had to almost die in order to feel alive again. That's what she doesn't want Simon to know; she's a killer, a violent, government trained killer. She would have killed Early; snapped his neck like a twig had you not made him float away."
Mal sits back and absorbs the information, trying to understand how anyone could do that to person, let alone a teenage girl. "Is this why you've suddenly got this fascination with my merc?" Mal questions a few minutes later.
River's eyes close slightly and a small, half smile floats across her face. "Jayne has a darkness that rival's her own. And she can feel it, humming under his skin, singing out to hers." River whispers huskily. "She likes it. Makes her feel warm and alive and safe for the first time since she was little."
Mal closes his eyes, not wanting to see the lust induced face she's wearin'.
"More than lust." River corrects. "And no, she didn't read your mind. She knows what her face looks like when she thinks about Jayne. It's an animalistic urge that goes deep inside her; she doesn't want to have sex with Jayne, she wants to mate with him."
"Gorramit, little witch, I can't be hearin' that." Mal groans. "Why would you even tell me that?"
"Same reason she told you everything else." River replies. "A girl likes to confide in her daddy."
"Ain't your daddy." Mal protests.
"You look after her, protect her, yell at her when she's misbehaved, tells her she did a good job when she does." River argues. "You set limits, give her rules. Simon never would. She can talk him into anything with a look. But it doesn't work on you most of the time. Simon doesn't yell at her, he feels too guilty to do it. But you do. You may not have a biological connection to her but you do have an emotional one; just like with Kaylee."
"Guess I can't argue with that." Mal mutters.
"So, captain daddy, does she have your permission to let Jayne pursue her?" River asks.
"And if I say no?" Mal questions back.
"Then she will just have to sneak around." River answers.
"Still think you're too young for that hundan." Mal replies.
"Age wise, maybe." River says. "But how many people have gone through what she has? Her trials make her older."
"True." Mal agrees.
"Or, if you want to subdue the blood lust she's experiencing for Jayne for a few weeks, you could let her go on jobs with you." River offers with a smile. "Participating in violent acts should control the urges for a while. Though, being violent with Jayne watching just might make it worse. She's not sure yet. Experiments will have to be done to see what effects Jayne has on her while fighting."
"You ain't goin' on jobs." Mal growls.
"Then she will have to mate with Jayne." River replies. "It's the only way to correctly control the blood lust. She can only do so much on her own."
"On your…" Mal mutters. "Suo-yo duh doh shr-dang! If I'm supposed to be your pa now, you can't go sayin' things like that to me. I don't wanna know that."
River giggles.
"You really are a brat." Mal mutters. "And don't you go throwin' no more boots at me or I'll ground you or something."
"She's never been grounded before." River comments. "It might be fun."
"How's bein' sent to your room fun?" Mal questions.
"Because she can find ways to sneak out." River smirks. "She likes puzzles."
Mal tries to look pissed but just ends up smiling at her.
River jumps up suddenly and walks over to the lockers across the bridge. She takes out a blanket and uses it to cover Mal up. "You need to go to sleep." River orders. She bends down and kisses his cheek before returning to her own chair. "She will wake you up if anything occurs."
"You gonna keep buggin' me bout it if I don't go to sleep?" Mal questions.
"Yes." River answers.
"Fine, little witch." Mal mutters. "You best wake me up if somethin' happens."
"She will." River assures him.
Mal watches as she opens her pad of paper and starts drawing before closing his eyes and drifting off.
-
"Has anyone seen River?" Simon questions, moving quickly into the mess.
"No." Jayne grunts, not really awake.
"You lost your sister?" Wash questions.
"Yes." Simon answers. "I went to wake her up only to find her bed empty."
"I ain't seen her, Simon." Kaylee replies. "But I'll help ya look."
"Thanks, Kaylee." Simon says, smiling sweetly at her.
"You're welcome." Kaylee replies, smiling sweetly back.
"Some of us just woke up." Jayne growls. "Ain't wantin' to see all that mushy go-se this early."
"Don't be so grumpy, Jayne." Kaylee says.
"Why not?" Jayne replies.
"Because it's so different from your normal, bubbly persona." Wash comments.
Jayne flips him off.
"No thanks." Wash replies. "Simon, I'm heading up to the bridge. Think Mal's up there. He might know where she is."
"Okay." Simon says.
"Come on, Jayne." Zoe orders.
"Why I gotta go for?" Jayne grunts. "I didn't loose her."
"Mal said he wants to talk bout the job coming up." Zoe replies. "Probably wants to do it before breakfast."
Jayne mutters under his breath but stands up with a groan. "Too damn early to be up, if you ask me."
"Good thing we didn't." Zoe replies. She leads the way out of the mess and runs into Inara and Wash, both making their way to the mess.
"Book, have you seen River?" Simon questions.
"No, son." Book answers. "I haven't."
"Me either." Inara replies.
"We're goin' to the bridge to see if cap'n seen her." Kaylee says.
Inara and Book follow the assembled crew onto the bridge only to stop at the sight of the captain and River sitting quietly on the bridge.
"Mei-mei, what are you doing…" Simon starts.
"Shh." River shushes her brother. "You'll wake up captain daddy."
"Captain what?" Wash questions with a bark of laughter.
"Too late." River mutters. She sits her pad on her lap and looks towards the waking captain.
"How long I'd sleep for?" Mal mumbles as he stands up and stretches.
"3 hours, 26 minutes and 47 seconds." River answers.
"Huh." Mal mutters before dropping back into his chair. He spins around to see all of his crew watching him. "What're ya all doin' up here?"
"Looking for River." Wash replies. "Captain daddy."
"Don't you be callin' me that." Mal orders.
"Mei-mei, you can't call Mal that either." Simon says.
"She can." River argues.
"Mei-mei." Simon protests.
"Doc, it seems your little sisters been gettin' some strange urges lately." Mal says, giving him a specific look. "One bein' she's decided to adopt me as her very own pa."
"That's so sweet." Kaylee gushes.
"Don't know bout all that." Mal mutters. "Ain't ever been sweet before."
"Don't we all know that." Inara mutters.
"What was that?" Mal replies.
"Nothing." Inara says.
"Alright, little witch, you got some chores to do." Mal orders.
"Chores?" River questions, cocking her head.
"Yep." Mal responds. "You're gonna help little Kaylee make breakfast and then clean the mess. And, since you decided to lock em in that closet yesterday, you get to clean it, dong ma?"
"Does she have to?" River questions, a pout crossing her lips as she looks at him with large eyes.
Simon sees the look she's using, the one that always works on him and looks towards Mal, wanting to see the older man's reaction.
"Yes, she does have to." Mal replies. "That look ain't gonna work on me, we done decided that. You can save if for your pushover of a brother."
River laughs happily and jumps up. "She knows." River replies. "She was just testing you."
"Now git." Mal orders.
River starts to walk away when she turns suddenly and grabs her pad of paper. "She drew pictures." River says, ripping off several sheets of paper.
"Ain't that sweet." Wash comments with a grin. "She drew her captain daddy some pictures."
Mal glares at Wash before taking the sheets of paper River's holding out to him. "Shun-sheng duh gao-wahn." Mal mutters as he flips through the papers.
"What?" Wash questions, moving to look over Mal's shoulder. "What the?"
"What did she draw?" Simon questions.
Mal wordlessly hands him the paper. The remaining crew gathers around the doctor to look at the drawings.
"It's Serenity." Kaylee gasps.
The first pages was the front view of the ship, the second the right side, and so on. She had drawn the outside of the boat from every angle. Each drawing was done right down to every detail, every scratch and bump the boat had received.
"River, these are amazing." Inara comments. "How long have you been working on them?"
"She drew them while captain daddy was snoring." River answers. "She made more." She hands Mal some more papers, this time of the inside of the boat.
"You make up these place?" Mal questions, not knowing what some of them are.
"No." River replies. "They are some of her hidey place. Not all of them but a few. She will show you later so you will have more places to hide illegal cargo."
"Sounds like a plan." Mal says, a bit startled that she knew of places that he didn't.
"She's smaller than you." River explains. "She can find better places to hide."
"Huh?" Wash mutters. "What is she talking about?"
"Just explaining how she knows of places that I didn't." Mal replies.
"Sir, are you okay?" Zoe questions. "Cause it seems like River's mind reading is spreading off on to you."
"I'm fine." Mal replies. "That all of them?"
"For you." River answers. "They didn't take her that long and she got bored. She drew other things too." She then hands Wash a couple sheets of paper.
"Dinos." Wash says happily. "Very violent dinos."
"That's what dinosaurs did." River explains. "They weren't very friendly. She couldn't draw lies."
Zoe glances at the papers her husband is holding, taking in the detail with a sharp eyes. The first page was of a T-Rex eating a smaller dinosaur, blood and flesh hanging from its sharp teeth, the other dinosaurs' corpse on the ground in front of it. The next page had a flying dinosaur, she don't know what it's called, flying towards a nest. The last was of two triceratops fighting.
"She drew Kaylee pictures too." River says.
"Really?" Kaylee questions excitedly. She takes the paper from River and looks at them before squealing loudly. "It's my girl."
"What?" Mal questions.
"She drew me pictures of the engine." Kaylee explains, handing them to Mal. "Thanks River."
"You are welcome." River responds. She holds the last few pages out to Jayne.
"Huh?" Jayne mutters, looking down at the paper. He takes them from her, flipping through them quickly. "Ya drew my girls?"
"She likes drawing them." River responds. "Especially Vera. She's pretty."
"Yeah." Jayne agrees. "She's a beaut."
"Mei-mei, did you draw women?" Simon questions, thinking she's talking about Jayne's whores.
"No, silly." River answers. "His girls. He has many girls, polished and hung up. They're very pretty."
"Huh?" Mal mutters. "Jayne, what'd she draw?"
Jayne hands him the papers.
Mal looks at them and then at the merc. "These right?"
"Yep." Jayne replies. "Right down to the modifications I made myself."
"Little witch, when'd you see Jayne's guns?" Mal questions. "Cause I made a rule bout that."
"No touching guns." River verifies. "She didn't touch them. She saw them before, when he was leaving for a job."
"But that couldn't have been for more than a few seconds." Mal comments.
"She learned them all." River replies. "She could tell you their names, if you would like."
"Not right now." Mal says. "You got stuff to do, remember?"
"She remembers." River replies. "Come on, Kaylee. She has things to do." River grabs Kaylee's hand and then grabs her brothers. "You too, Simon. It won't hurt you to do some manual labor." She then drags them both down the steps and away from the bridge.
"Alright, sir." Zoe says, once she's sure they're out of hearing range. "What's going on?"
"Shut the door." Mal orders.
Book and Inara go to leave, thinking they're going to discuss the job.
"Nara, Book, want you two to say." Mal stops them. "Everyone get comfortable; I got some things to share."
Zoe shuts the door before moving to lean against the console next to Mal. Wash plops down in the chair River vacated while Book takes the chair to the side. Inara leans against the lockers and Jayne leans against the closed door.
"First off, this don't go past this room." Mal orders. "Nobody else hears bout it, dong ma?"
"How's that gonna work?" Jayne questions. "Can't she just read our ruttin' minds to find out what we're talkin' bout?"
"Don't work that way." Mal replies.
"How do you know that?" Book questions.
"She told me." Mal answers. "Said the mind's like a book. She don't look past the cover. Said a person's mind is a private thing and readin' it would be just like rape."
"Oh." Jayne mutters, relieved. His mind ain't no place for her to be.
"Now, I want everyone's word that they ain't gonna say nothin' to Kaylee or Simon." Mal says.
"It's her brother." Book protests. "Doesn't he have the right to know?"
"She don't think he can handle it and frankly neither do I." Mal replies.
"Handle what?" Zoe questions.
"Story of how she came to be 'saner'." Mal replies. He thinks back on what she told him and feels the rage filling his body again. Some folk deserve to die for what they done to that innocent girl.
"She told you?" Inara questions. "Why?"
"Said a girl should be able to confide in her daddy." Mal answers. "Hell, most of me wishes she hadn't. Why that girl ain't slit her own wrists, I don't know. If I been through half the shit she has, I'd done myself in a long gorram time ago."
"That bad?" Zoe questions.
"Worse." Mal answers. "They turned her brain into their ruttin playground, puttin' stuff in it that no person should ever experience."
"What kinda stuff?" Jayne questions.
"I'll get to that." Mal answers. "First thing that needs to be realized, every gorram thing they put into her brain, she experienced like it ruttin' happened. Said it was almost like a virtual reality game. And I know she didn't tell me a lot, just enough to explain why she seems to be better."
Mal then proceeds to tell them point blank what she told him. He can hear Inara gasp and cover her mouth, can feel the tension in Zoe's body next to him. A glance at the Shepard and he sees a look he ain't ever seen on the man. Wash's face whitens and he grips the chair tightly. He don't even have to look at Jayne to feel the rage pouring off the merc's body, but a glance forward shows him somethin' he's never seen in Jayne's eyes. He's seen the merc wanna kill but ain't ever seen it with that much anger. Or seen the merc look like he wants to protect somethin'. River musta been right bout that mating thing, cause Jayne's lookin' like some large beast who's mate's been hurt.
"Reavers?" Inara gasps.
"Yep." Mal replies. "And from what she said, more than once. Said she'd either kill em all or they'd kill her."
"Kill how?" Jayne growls.
"Jayne, you know how Reavers kill." Mal says. "That's all she would say."
Jayne clenches his fist, not used to the rage he's feelin'. Sure, he's felt anger before but nothin' like this.
"So, she thought all of this, all of us was just another test they put in her brain?" Wash questions.
"Yep." Mal responds. "Couldn't figure out what the mission was or why we weren't attackin' her. Said after a while, after she nobody tried to kill her, she figured that she was supposed to do the attackin'. Which is why she slashed your chest, Jayne. Said if it was the mission, then we'd all try to kill her and she could fight and it would be over. If not, you could handle it better than the rest of us. She knew ya'd hit back, said it's your natural reaction to bein' attacked, nothin' personal. She ruttin' attacked hopin' we'd try to kill her."
"But she doesn't still think it's a test, does she?" Inara questions quietly.
"Nope." Mal answers. "Surprisingly enough, it's Jayne's little stunt on Ariel that, in her words, woke her up. Felt those blue-handed guys comin' and realized that it wasn't in her head. Said she still didn't feel like she was alive but no longer felt like she was trapped in her ruttin' mind. Didn't feel alive till Early. Said almost dyin' made her finally feel alive."
"Why?" Book questions a few moments later.
"Research." Mal answers. "Her brain is all special-like and they was tryin' to learn from it. I'm thinkin' they just wanted to see how much ruttin' shit they could fill it with till she burst. And they were makin' a weapon, a perfect weapon and weapons need to train. Guess there's no better way to make a perfect killer then pin em against a bunch of rapin' and murderin' Reavers."
Mal gives them a few moments to absorb everything before talking again. "I don't know how she's survived this, but she has." Mal says. "She ain't goin' back. If they come for her again, then they gotta get through every gorram person on this boat to get her."
Everyone nods their agreement.
"Same thing with their ruttin' parents." Mal growls. "They ain't gettin' near her neither. From they way she acts, they'd probably just send her back. Jayne, I'm trustin' you to look after her if'n she gets off the boat, understand? Someone tries to nab her, you know what to do."
"Yeah." Jayne agrees.
"Good." Mal replies. "Now, I told you all this for two reasons. One, I think you'll needed to know, to understand why's she the way she is. Two, I couldn't handle knowing alone. But, like I done said, Kaylee and the doc don't find out till she wants them too."
"Yes." Book agrees. "I think this would be very detrimental to Simon's mental well being, Kaylee's too."
"That said, you guys take the time you need to absorb this." Mal says. "Don't go treatin' her like she's a child cause she ain't. Nara, I want you to take her to your shuttle sometime when Kaylee's got the doc distracted and see if you can't get her to talk bout anything sexual that may have been done to her. I don't think she'd tell me and I know she ain't gonna tell Simon."
"Okay." Inara agrees.
"I'm gonna head on down to the mess." Mal says. "I'll see you all in a bit, Nara, walk with me." He and Inara leave the bridge quietly, leaving the rest of the crew to their thoughts.
"I want you to get her some form of stable birth control." Mal says once they're out of hearing range of the bridge. "Somethin' that her brother ain't gonna know she's taking."
"Why?" Inara questions.
"Way she talks bout it, it's more than a lust that she's feelin' for Jayne." Mal answers with a wince. "It's like some animal urge that she can't control. Pretty much said either she 'mates' with Jayne or goes on jobs, those are the only ways to control the blood lust."
"She told you this?" Inara asks. "And you didn't flip out?"
"Hell yes, I did." Mal replies. "Specially when she started talkin' bout how she's handlin' it now. I'm gonna get Kaylee and Simon off doin' something sometime in the next few days and I want you to have that talk with her and if you have it, giver her the protection thing."
"What are you planning on doing?" Inara questions with a small smile. "Locking her and Jayne in a closet?"
"Naw." Mal answers. "Didn't you see Jayne's reactions? He's bout a step away from claimin' her for his own. Don't think I'm gonna need to do anything."
"Are you sure you're not on drugs?" Inara questions. "I never would have thought in a million years that you would be helping River get Jayne."
"Just want what's best for her." Mal says quietly. "She's been through so gorram much, she deserves to get what she wants. And she wants Jayne for some ruttin' reason."
"You're taking your new parenting responsibilities very seriously." Inara comments.
"Yep." Mal replies. "What can I say, her and little Kaylee bring out my protective 'sweet' side."
"It looks good on you." Inara says as she steps into the mess. Her gaze automatically goes to River and notices with a smile as the genius scolds her brother for burning the protein.
"Simon, you are a doctor." River says. "How can you not follow simple instructions? A trained ape could do this."
"Then let's get Jayne in here." Simon mutters.
River kicks him in the shin, hard.
"Owww." Simon squeals, hopping on one leg as he holds onto his injured shin. "You kicked me."
"She knows." River glares. "And she'll do it again if you don't stop being mean." She grabs the pan of burned protein out of his hand and dumps it into the sink. "It's not nice to pick on somebody when they're not in the room. Jayne doesn't call you names unless you're there."
"What's wrong with Simon?" Wash questions upon seeing the doctor hopping around the table to sit down in a chair.
Mal spins around to see the rest of the crew moving into the mess.
"River kicked him." Kaylee says with a giggle.
"Why?" Zoe asks.
"Simon was being mean." River answers. "He shouldn't be mean about people if they're not in the room to be mean back."
"Jayne's way of being mean would be to knock me across the room." Simon protests.
"What do I got to do with it?" Jayne questions, not really paying attention to the injured doc. Instead, he's watching River, a huge smile on her face as she watches the protein cook. He don't know how, but that little slip of a girl has brought out a protective side he didn't know he had.
"Jayne, you're not going to threaten the doc?" Wash questions.
"For what?" Jayne grunts.
"For implying that you're a trained ape." Wash answers.
"That's why she kicked him?" Jayne asks. He turns to look at the doc and sees his leg propped up on the table as he examines his shin, a bruise already forming on the pale skin. "Looks like I don't gotta threaten him. She's already done it for me."
"Yes, she did." Simon mutters. He's a bit upset that his sister kicked him over the mercenary.
"Damn, she kicked you hard." Mal comments, looking at the bruised skin.
"I noticed." Simon replies.
"Guess that'll learn ya to be a bit nicer." Mal says with a grin.
"Guess it will."
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