I woke up to the smell of chocolate cake and eggs wafting from the kitchen. Mmm… Food sounds good right now. I stood up and stretched to wake myself up.

"Oh, morning Jamie." I heard from the kitchen.

"Morning Ponyboy." I replied, squinting into the bright morning sun pouring into the living room.

"Want some breakfast? He asked casually, flipping the eggs over.

"Sure, thanks Pony."

He brought in a slice of cake and a couple of eggs over easy, just the way I like it. "You're welcome."

He started walking away but stopped. "Anything wrong Jamie? You seem down." Good old Ponyboy, always making sure I'm alright.

"Me and Darry just had an argument the other night. Don't worry about it Pony." I said taking and bite of the warm chocolate.

"Well, what was it about?" He sat down next to me.

"Just about me going back to school, but I don't wanna talk about it. No offense Pony, but it's just not a good time." Taking another bite of chocolate cake I sighed.

I really did hate having Darry angry at me. We rarely ever had any fights and this was the first huge one. Never would I have imagined fighting with Darry and having said those things. I didn't mean to say it, emotions were running high and, I dunno, it all just slipped out.

Pony walked into the kitchen to finish making breakfast, leaving me to think.

Darry walked into the room, acting as if I wasn't there. My face went into an automatic frown and I honestly felt like crying. Knowing I hurt Darry so badly just made me want to break down on the floor in front of him and start apologizing like crazy. I had the urge, trust me.

"Morning Darry." Ponyboy said slowly, looking at us both. "Breakfast is on the table."

"Thanks Pony."

He looked over at me and said firmly, "Morning Jamie."

"Morning Darry."

He looked at me a second longer and walked into the other room to eat breakfast.

"Don't worry Jamie," Pony said, sitting down next to me. "Everything is going to be alright soon."

"I hope you're right Pony…" I said, trying to convince myself that what I just said was true. I finished my breakfast and slipped on a coat.

"Where are you goin'?" Pony asked with concern.

"Just got to visit Two-Bit. He has my clothes and I really need to go pick them up. I'll be back soon." and I walked out the door, still thinking hard.

"Hey cousin." I said while walking in to see Two-Bit sitting on the couch watching TV and drinking beer.

"Hey Jamie." Two-Bit immediately stood up and hugged me tightly. "I've been so worried about you."

"I'm okay Two-Bit. I just came to get my things. Before auntie gets home."

"Oh yeah…" He dashed up the stairs and came back down with all my clothes.

"Here ya go." He said handing them to me. "So you've been at Darry's house."

I frowned again and the feeling of breaking down was coming back to me. "Yeah…"

"What's got you down?"

"Oh, me and Darry just had an argument; it's not a big deal…" But it was. I was pissed at myself and I couldn't help but want to slap myself.

"Jamie, I didn't know. Tell me what happened."

We sat on the couch and I told him the whole story. The good thing about this was that Two-Bit listened to me and understood me more than anyone.

"Wow Jamie, you said some really hurtful stuff back there. You're makin' me wanna rush in my room. You should really apologize to him."

"Well that's really difficult to do when he can hardly stand to look at me." I said sadly.

"Look Jamie, just apologize. Well, try to at least. I know Darry, he'll listen.

"Yeah, I'll try."

I said good bye to Two-Bit and walked down the street to the Curtis' house. On my way there, I thought, what if this thing never gets resolved? What if Darry never forgives me? I would be emotionally scarred for life. That night had played over and over in my head and when I see myself yelling at Darry, I just want to slap myself. Just another imperfection of mine. I say things without thinking. If I had just slowed down and stayed calm enough to think, maybe I wouldn't have said those things and we wouldn't be in this predicament. I never would have hurt Darry and none of this would have happened. I am just so stupid…

"Hey Pony." I said, seeing him on the couch, twiddling his thumbs.

"Oh, hey Jamie." He replied back, looking really troubled. "Hey, I gotta talk to you bout Darry."

"Go ahead." I said, scared of what he might say.

"Me and Darry were talking today and after we talked, I asked him about your argument and he just ran outta here as fast as he could. He's really upset about it."

"Yeah, me too…" I said sitting next to him and hanging my head in shame. "I regret ever saying that and I wish I could take back every single word I said to him."

"Well, just talk to him. He's been really stressed out lately and I'm really worried about him."

"Yeah, I'll talk to him. When does he get home today?"

"'Round four. He gets off early today."

"Alright. Hey Pony, you wanna come and walk with me to the park? Come keep me company?" I asked him. I didn't feel too hot about walking by myself. The issue with the Socs has calmed down a little, but you would still get jumped if you were a known greaser.

"Yeah, sure. I ain't got anything better to do until Soda gets home anyways." And he jumped up from the couch and followed me outside.

I walked with him in silence for a while until-

"Man, movin' to Dallas seems like a good idea right now," I said bluntly.

"Why?"

"There ain't nothin' for me here Pony. If I move to Dallas, I can start over. Be a new person. No one knows me there and I can be anyone I want to be."

I saw Ponyboy frown from the corner of my eye. "But you're Jamie Sanders, and I like you like that."

"Yeah Pony, but like I said, I don't have anything here."

"You got the gang. We'll miss you when you leave."

"I'll miss you too Pony. All of you guys."

And what had happened will stay in my mind forever.

"Jamie, just don't forget us. We'll miss you a lot and just remember you always have a home here."

"Thanks Pony." And I smiled. I turned and hugged him tightly, hoping that this feeling would last. "I love you Ponyboy Curtis."

"I love you too, Jamie Sanders."

And at that very moment, at that very exact point in time, I felt… different. There were butterflies in my stomach, I couldn't really think straight, and this was all sending shivers down my spine. I felt like nothing in the world could hurt me because Ponyboy was there. I felt like time was stopping and all that was left was me and him. I felt… in love.

Yes ladies and gentlemen, I said it. I said it and it felt good. It felt great. No, it felt right. Saying 'I love you' to Ponyboy was so right, it couldn't be any more right than it already is. All the things that were happening to me like the butterflies and the tingles and the shivers, I loved every minute of it.

Everything left my mind all that could be contemplated was, "I love you." I just can't stop thinking about it. And you wanna know something else?

I love Ponyboy Curtis with all my heart. Savvy?

Sorry if I dissappoint. I know it wasn't very long and if you wanted Soda then too bad! But like I said, I tried and I got plans today. I'll update soon though! I ono if it'll be long, but as long asI update it doesn't matter right?

Monica :