Chapter Three

I Love Weddings (Drinks All Around)

"Land!" Jack yelled, making Gibbs choke on his rum. "Sweet heaven above, Land! I have never been so happy to see land in my whole life, mate! Woo hoo!" Jack looked like he might actually cry at the sight. As predicted, it had been an annoyingly long trip back here to Port Royal. He had ended up keeping James in the brig just so that Jack could sleep!

On the first night, it seemed logical to treat him as a guest. After all, he didn't want James getting hurt because of something a damn Gypsy did. If James was going to get hurt, it was going to be from a proper fight. So he set up a hammock in his own bunk and thought it gentlemanly to let James have the bed. This had proved to be easier said than done. For as soon as the candles were blown out and Jack was trying to make himself comfortable, he felt James climb on top of him.

"Commodore, this is highly—Stop that! No! Guh! Please stop! Commodore! Son of a—Hey! Now that is too far! Get your hands off! Norrington!" Then the man had tumbled off him. Jack stood up and breathed deeply. That had almost been very bad! James looked up at him with big puppy eyes that Jack could have melted in. This was wrong. So very wrong! He was going to kill Zigana when he got a hold of her. And why were Norrington's lips just the right shade of pink? It made him want to dip down and kiss him, but that would only encourage him, and he couldn't have that.

"Listen here, Commodore," the Captain said slowly. "Now, I'm going to go into the hammock, and you are going to get into the bed. And you are going to stay there and not get up, alright? And you will sleep and not make noise and you will behave yourself."

He walked James back to the bed and tucked him in. James still had those damn big eyes. Then Jack climbed back into his hammock and when nothing happened, he started to drift to sleep. And just when he was in that restful place between dreams and blackness—

"What that—COMMODORE!"

Jack sighed as he remembered it, the hills of Port Royal slowly coming into view. Of course, they were going around the back side of the island. No point in docking, or there would be hell to pay. Besides, he wasn't planning on staying there long. Just get in, look around, and then leave… with maybe a quick stop at the Turner wedding.

"We can stop here, Mr. Gibbs," Jack said. "Anchor down and take down the sails. I'll go get our beloved Commodore from the brig. Hopefully this nightmare will be over before tonight."

"Do you plan on letting Zigana live, Cap'n'?" Gibbs asked.

"Frankly, that depends on her." With that Jack sighed and walked down to the brig. Only one cell was taken and James was sitting there a slightly annoyed look on his face. Jack stood in front of the bars and sighed. "Well we are here at last."

"I don't understand," James said, not looking at Jack.

"Sure ya do. We are back in Port Royal. We are going to go… fix… this."

"No I understand where we are. I don't understand what I'm doing wrong. You seem to like forward, so I tried forward but that got me locked up. So what do I do? Am I not your type? Of course I'm not. I'm never anyone's type."

"Now, Commodore," Jack sighed. He didn't like this at all. "It has nothing to do with my type. "

"So I am your type?"

"What? I—I don't know! I don't think I have a type!" Annoyed and really needing a drink, Jack banged his head against the bars of the cell. "Look, Commodore—"

"Call me James," said the other man. Jack blinked once.

"Alright… James." The name sounded… sweet on his lips, like some fruit, so rare and juicy that he didn't want to let anyone else taste it. No it was his name and no one else was allowed to say it. Wait, what? Where had that come from? Bad Jack! No thoughts along those lines! Those were bad and evil thoughts. Thoughts like these led to other thoughts… thoughts of that limber body pressed closed to his as the rolled around the bed, lips meeting in a frantic kiss. Jack thought he would taste of vanilla. He wasn't sure why, James just looked like he would taste of vanilla. Maybe it was that skin. GAH! Bad thoughts, Jack! What was he saying?

"It's about types, James," Jack said, pushing the all too sweet thoughts out of his mind for the time being. "It's about how wrong it would be to take advantage of you in this state. It would be wrong on anyone. It's just not right, savvy?"

"Since when have you cared about right or wrong?" Now James was on his feet and was moving toward the bars until he was on the opposite side of Jack. "You are a pirate. I know that. I love that. I want you. This is what I want. How can it be wrong?"

"It's what you want now," Jack said with a long sigh. "But it might not be what you want when she takes the spell off you. You should be turned back to normal so you can know what you truly want. And trust me, it won't be me."

"How do you know?" James asked. "Maybe I would." And from the bars, he reached out and touched Jack's face. Jack cursed the man's hands, which were far too soft to be a sailor's. "Maybe this is just where I want to be."

Forcing a scowl on his face, Jack removed James' hand from his face. "Well we don't know that for sure. But we are going to go fix this one way or the other. Now behave." He unlocked the cell door and James followed like a puppy all the way up to the deck. Jack was forcing himself to calm down. It would be so easy to just jump the Commodore and have his way with him. And this begging, pleading, animal-like James was enough to drive anyone into madness… and Jack had been so sure he was already mad.

The rowboat slowly moved across the waves. James wouldn't take his eyes off Jack who was finding that extremely annoying. The whole time he rowed he looked anywhere but the Commodore, afraid he might act on James' offers. He was so going to hurt Zigana for this.

At last they reached shore. Jack pulled the boat further onto the sand. "Come on, James, let's go find ourselves a Gypsy."

The Turner Wedding was the talk of the town. It was being held in the large church and so it was not hard to find. Jack was, of course, extremely underdressed. So he did the only thing he could do, he snuck up to the roof and into the rafters, bringing James along. He was too afraid to leave him outside, less someone else find him a question where he had been and who he was with.

Elizabeth looked like an angel. Jack smiled a little at her elegant white dress. Poor Will looked like he wasn't at all sure what to do and so he just smiled stupidly. Jack leaned back a little and glanced at James who looked… pensive.

"Lovely wedding," Jack commented. James made a small, agreeing sound. "Wishing that was you?" It was walking on thin ice, he knew, but he was hoping this might jog James back.

"Thanking God it isn't me, actually," James answered and closed his eyes, crossing himself.

That threw Jack for a loop. He didn't say anything more just watched as the two people who had saved his life were joined, for better or for worse, until death did they part. Jack hoped for their sakes that wasn't for a good fifty years. Really, it was a lovely wedding. Will looked so happy Jack thought he would bust. And Elizabeth was blushing half the time. They were perfect for each other, and Jack said as much.

"Hmm," James replied, tilting his head to one side and gazing at Jack. "We could be perfect, too, you know." And his hand went to Jack's knee. Jack almost fell off the rafters.

"James what did I just talk to you about?" He grabbed James' wrist and pulled him closer so he wouldn't make noise. "I told you no, remember?"

"You said 'behave,'" James replied, using their closeness to flirt shamelessly with the Captain. "But you didn't say for how long." And he moved close, desperate for their lips to touch, and oh Jack wanted to kiss him. The irony that below them, Will and Elizabeth were kissing was not lost on Jack. He forced himself away from James.

"Stop it," he hissed. There was that kicked puppy look again. Heaven help him, Jack smiled a little. Of all the words he had used to Commodore Norrington, this was the first time 'cute' could be one of them.

And then the wedding was over and Jack was clapping with the rest of the attendants. The whole party moved outside and Jack and James followed. "Where will they be heading now?" Jack asked as they climbed down the side of the church.

"The Governor's home," James answered. "There is to be a party in their honor."

"Perfect, we'll get them there then." And he headed the wrong way. James pointed this out. "That's the wrong way for the front, which we will not be going in." And they soon found themselves climbing through the back window of the Swann house.

"You've done this before," James commented as he stumbled into the room.

"Only once or twice," Jack said with a shrug, helping the other man to his feet. "Snuck in your house once, you know."

"I know. You took my favorite painting." But James didn't seem upset about it. "I saw it hanging in your cabin. Didn't know it had been you until then. Why'd you keep it?"

"Don't know, mate. Liked it I wager," and Jack shushed them as they moved into the hall. The party was in full swing and Jack found it surprisingly easy to navigate through without bringing too much attention to himself. Mostly he just looked down and tried to act like a servant who happened to be dressed like a pirate. It wasn't hard to find the happy couple; they were standing in the middle of the entry hall. "Now we just have to get them away, aye, James?... James?"

But James wasn't behind him. "Oh bloody hell." How could he have lost him? This day just kept getting better and better. "James?" He whispered, looking around. "James, when I find you I'm going to nail you down to the floor!" He blinked when he realized what he had just said. "And not in a good way," he added.

Still no James. Jack began to retrace his steps. But James wasn't anywhere he had left him. "Shit!" He hissed. "Shit shit shit!" Who knew what kind of trouble that boy was getting into? He was never letting him out of his sight again!

"Why, James, whatever happened to you?"

Jack stood very still. That was Elizabeth's voice. "Shit!" He said again, turning around and heading back to where he had seen Lizzie and Will. Sure enough, there was his James Norrington. Wait, wait, back this train up. His? Where had that thought come from! He pushed it aside and moved quickly over to James before he could speak. "Hello, Turners!" He greeted happily!"

Lizzie and Will gasped and looked around. "Jack, what are you doing here?" Will asked. "We warned you not to come!"

"I know you did. Listen, we need to talk."

"We are kind of busy right now," Will said, looking at his wife, who was looking at James.

"He isn't attacking you," she remarked. Will blinked. "Jack what's going on?"

"That's what I need to talk to you about. Can you slip away for two seconds?"

The two nodded and they slowly made their way to a room, which turned out to be an office. They all sat down, Will and Elizabeth noting that James sat right next to Jack without so much a dirty look.

"Will, Lizzie," Jack said taking a long sigh to calm himself down. "James has been put under a curse and now he is hopelessly in love with me."

Silence followed for a moment. Then, Will and Elizabeth started to laugh. Jack frowned as they held their sides and tossed their heads back. "It's not funny," he said. But still they wouldn't stop laughing. "Why won't you believe me? James here is very ill!" He put his hand on James' knee, for emphasis. "Cut it out!"

"You---You," Elizabeth sputtered out through fits of laughter. "You expect us to b-b-believe that James Norrington is in-in-in LOVE with y-y-you!"

"No way!" Will said, shacking his head. "Not in a billion y—" But he stopped himself and so did Elizabeth with what happened next.

Jack had foolishly left his hand on James' knee. And this had been taken as some sort of open invitation for James to resume his seduction of the pirate. James let out a low growl and then placed his hand on Jack's leg, slowly moving it up and up. Jack gasped in surprise but was even more surprised when he found James sitting on his lap, his lips trailing along his jaw and down his neck. His hands went from Jack's leg to his shoulders and hair and Jack found himself wanting very badly to return the favor by pulled James closer and kissing him. But that wouldn't do. Not at all.

"Believe me now?" Jack asked, before pushing James off his lap and back into his old chair. "James, mate, you gotta learn some self control. I told you to cut it out!"

James growled again. Jack couldn't help but shiver just a little.

"Okay…" Elizabeth whispered. "Maybe I do believe you. Jack, please tell me you didn't do anything with him."

"I may be a pirate, luv, but I'm not a total ass. Of course I haven't done anything. And believe me I've shown restraint that other men would not have been able to."

"Well who did this to him?" Will asked.

"A woman by the name of Zigana. She's a gypsy, and she tends to cause this trouble."

"Oh she must have been one of the ones at the bon fire!" Elizabeth whispered.

"So she was here! Great! Is she still here? Are any of the Gypsies still here?"

"Umm…" the Turners said together.

"Oh great!" Jack hid his face in his hands. "Bloody great! Nothing ever goes to plan. Life hates Jack Sparrow!" He stood up suddenly. "Come on, James, we are going. Will, Lizzie, congrats, and thanks for everything."

"Leaving? Where will you go?" Lizzie asked.

"To find Zigana. And I think I know how," and his hand went to his compass.