Chapter 18


A gentle brush against his hand woke him up.

Tiredly, he started to lift his head, when it fell back down again as intense blinding pain shot through him. He barely resisted the urge to cry out and began taking deep breaths to remove the agony. Through the pain that had almost paralyzed him, he felt the tingle again and his stinging eyes moved to look at his hand. What he saw made his heart stop in his chest. Not thinking about what kind of pain that sudden movement would give him, he snapped his head up to her face.

She was looking at him.

"Liz...?" he croaked.
She was crying. Her eyes were red and if he had been able to see through the bandage covering her face he would've seen the frown of deep pain on her forehead. The pain had started to spread throughout his body. It felt as if his skin was on fire. His breathing became shallow and strained as he tried to control the pain. A pain he knew he was getting from the connection her return to consciousness had suddenly opened wide.

He never realized that he was crying. He never felt the hot tears. His attention was on the other part of his soul, who was looking at him. He could feel how much her eyes hurt by just looking, but underneath all the pain he could feel her feelings like a dull humming in the background. The pain was muffling most of it, making her most prominent feelings about pain and fear. But he could also feel her unwavering stubbornness to not to let him out of her line of vision. Her almost lethal desperation to hold onto him.

So that she wouldn't fall.

"Baby," Max whispered and moved his hands to her hair. Feeling her feelings in his body again was the most relieving and beautiful thing he had felt in a long dark time, even thought it was the most painful thing he had ever felt, seeing that the connection opened up all the pain Liz was feeling. Which only made him more determined to do what he had to do.

Even though he didn't want to let her go.

--------------------------------------------------------



Simultaneously in the next tent

Isabel jumped as the normally deathly quiet child screamed.

A long, prolonged cry of raw pain, that made shivers broke out on her skin. She immediately crawled closer to the child, while silently debating whether or not she should touch her. Whether it would be comfort for the child, or just adding to the fear that was suddenly boiling in the room. Her whimper stopped Isabel cold.

"Mommy..."
Isabel gasped inaudibly and tears started to flow down her cheeks.
"Emma?"
The child was as still as ever, but her eyes weren't. She was staring directly at Isabel and something in the way she was holding Isabel captured with her eyes told Isabel that something was different. There was a certain wakefulness and consciousness in her eyes. A focus.
"Mommy..." she whimpered again.
Isabel reached her decision and slowly reached out to touch her hair. Emma tensed at the contact, but she didn't move away like she used to.

"Your mommy is waiting for you, Emma. She loves you so much."
It seemed as if her soft whisper had reached Emma's ears, because the little girl started crying. Lonely, heart breaking wails of misery.
"It hurts..." Emma sobbed.
"I know, honey. But we are going to take that pain away, if you help us." Isabel wasn't sure what hurt. There were no outside signs of any injuries, and she was certain that Max had checked her over internally as well. If there were something wrong he would have told them. Wouldn't he?

-------------------------------------------------



Max slowly and painfully sifted through the pain. It was like looking for something buried in sand. No matter how much you dug, the sand kept flowing back into the hole, making the labor even more strenuous. He was searching for the question to which he could provide her the answers.
"Emma is with us," he whispered. He saw the strong relief in her eyes and the questioning look that followed. "She's fine." It was a lie, but Liz needed all the positive information she could get. She wasn't capable of handling the paralyzing pain while worrying about their little girl not being sane anymore.

"I love you so much, Liz," he whispered, his voice barely holding up against the tears streaming down his cheeks, a sign betraying the fear raging inside of him.
Her eyes filled with new tears, which fell onto the bandages on her cheeks.
"Please don't leave us," Max's hand was desperately clutching a bundle of her hair in his hands, as if trying to hold her there. "We need you."
He took a deep shuddering breath, and hastily brushed away the tears on his cheeks. "You have to fight, Liz."
Her eyelids were getting heavier, but he knew that she would not be able to find peace if she were conscious. The pain would not leave her alone, until it had tortured her mind into the same tarnished state her body was in.
"I love you," he whispered again before he moved his hands from her hair and his other hand up to her face, and concentrated hard on the connection.

As if it were a twig, he broke her only thread to consciousness, and the pain ended.

-------------------------------------------



"What's going on?" Michael asked as he stepped into the tent.
"Mommy..."
The anguished wail made his head snap into the direction of the curled up girl.
"She's talking?" he asked, a hint of hope in his voice, as he shifted his eyes to Isabel.
"Yes," Isabel said breathlessly, "But I think she's in pain."
"I'm getting Max," Michael said.
Isabel only nodded, her eyes once again glued to the little girl, who had now begun to writhe on the mattress, as if the material were burning against her skin. Isabel crept closer with the intention of pulling her into her arms, when she stilled, the whimper dying on her lips. The tent fell eerily silent as Emma's eyes once again became blank and unseeing. As if her connection to the real world had just dissipated, vanishing into thin air.

----------------------------------------------



"Max, you gotta come..." Michael's voice tailed off as his eyes landed on Max. Max looked up at him, face wet with tears and eyes red, before turning back to Liz again and reluctantly letting go of her hand.
"What is it, Michael?" he asked hoarsely.
Michael's eyes narrowed in confusion. "You need to see Em..." then a thought occurred to him and he frowned, "What happened with Liz?"
Max had risen to his feet at the mention of his daughter and was already walking towards Michael. His steps were tired, but his body had another sort of lightness than usual, which only further confirmed Michael's suspicions.
"What's wrong with Emma?" Max asked.

"Did Liz wake up?" Michael asked.
Max stopped and glanced over his shoulder at Liz. He inhaled deeply as he turned his head back to Michael and warily rubbed his hand over his face, noticing that he had been crying.
"Yes..." he said softly.
Michael had expected that answer, but it still surprised him. "What? How? Is that even... Is she..."
"I had to make her unconscious again," Max whispered.
Michael looked at his tortured friend. "Did she speak?"
"No," Max answered quietly, "She couldn't. The pain was too...there was too much pain. I could feel it, but only a fraction and it was enough to almost make me pass out." Max met Michael's eyes. "I had to knock her out. She couldn't go on with that pain. It's better that she doesn't feel anything at all."

Michael could see in his eyes how much that decision had torn him up. Max would probably have endured the pain through the connection, he just couldn't bear to see Liz in so much pain.
"But isn't this a good thing?" Michael asked.
Max closed his eyes. "I hope so," he whispered. "I hope this momentary consciousness is progress...and not her...her...saying...goodbye."
"Hey man," Michael said gently, putting a comforting hand on Max's shoulder. "She wasn't."
Max looked up at him and Michael saw disbelief, but also hope in his eyes. Max wanted to believe him, but life had dealt him so many evil hands in the last weeks that he had difficulties believing in the good. That anything good could happen for a change.
"She isn't," Michael corrected himself. Max stared at him, before tiredly nodding.
Max's eyes drifted to the opening of the tent. "What about Emma?"
"I think she felt the pain too," Michael said, having put it all together.
"What do you mean?" Max asked, his voice an emotional mixture of fear and guilt.
"They have a connection-"
His voice was cut off by Max's departure from the tent.

----------------------------------------------------



"She was awake, Max," Isabel said as Max entered the tent. Max strode up to Emma with determination.
"What happened?" Isabel asked worriedly as she saw the tear stains on Max's cheeks and his haggard looks.
"Liz woke up," Michael said from the opening.
"What?" Isabel cried out, looking between Max and Michael. "Is she okay?"
"No..." Max whispered as his hand threaded through Emma's hair. "Come here, baby."

Gently, Max turned Emma's stiff body towards him and pulled her into his lap. Isabel stared at them in awe. She had known that Max was more successful in reaching out to Emma then she and Michael were, but she didn't know that Emma would let herself be touched that much.
Max wrapped his arms around Emma's body and slowly started rocking her. He placed a tender kiss on the top of her head. With new tears rolling down his cheeks, he murmured words of comfort and love in her ear. Isabel rose and pulled Michael with her. Michael had to give her an update on what had happened with Liz.

They quietly left the tent, but Max probably wouldn't have heard them even if they had been noisy. He was lost in his own world. A world of memories. A world of happy laughter and beautiful smiles. A world of comforting hugs and gentle caresses. A world of kisses and love. A world that was slowly dying. Slipping through his hands like sand.

TBC…