Phew...almost finsihed, just a few more chapters to go, I believe. This chapter is rather a soppy one. And listenign to Enya's 'The Promise' While writing this, kinda made me cry a little. So yeah, when reading this I recommend you to listen to 'The Promise' at the same time.
Disclaimer: On Chapter one.
Chapter 11: Ada Finds out.
They weren't too sure what to do at all. One moment he was killing a guy and then the next he was crying. Elrond and Elrohir both held each other's eyes for a few moments, mentally wincing every time they could hear Elladan sniffle. Both deciding what the right thing was to do.
The wind picked up and rustled their hair and bit their cheeks with a chill. Elrohir tore his eyes away, took one more look at Elladan before moving in to the house. He ushered Erestor in and with them both supporting each other, both physically and emotionally, they soon disappeared from sight.
Smiling when he knew his son got the hint, Elrond took a glance at the stars above him and sent a silent prayer to the Valar asking for their much needed help. Something had happened, he could feel it, but what the foreboding was, he just couldn't quite place his finger on it.
Sighing and letting his breathe join the breeze, he stepped towards his crumbled son. He had hoped that now his barriers were down, maybe Elladan would let him in some light of the situation. Crouching down in front him and cursing himself for making his knees creak, he placed a comforting hand on Elladan's shoulder.
Elrond didn't want to know or couldn't being to comprehend what turmoil Elladan was going through, but it must have been something grave for him to act like that. He began to contemplate the possible reasons for Elladan's behaviour, but was soon brought out of his thoughts when he felt his eldest slowly raise his head.
For a moment, Elrond tried to see his eyes, Elladan could always be read like an open book through his eyes, and he hoped this time was the same. But when his son did show his tear glistened eyes towards him, he could have sworn he was looking into a different pair of eyes. Elladan's once bright, grey eyes usually telling stories of pride, wisdom and youth were now tired, withdrawn and shaded by growing uncertainty.
His bottom lip still quivered speaking of unshed tears and all of the worry that had been hidden behind the strong façade was now broken, his face spoke of a care worn, and he looked much older than Elrond remembered him.
All Elrond wanted to do right now was to yell at him, telling him what a fool he had been and demanding an answer for why he was acting so strangely, but it seemed, increasingly aware of late, that Elladan wasn't all himself anymore. Something inside was hurting. And it wasn't just his heart.
Elrond saw Elladan close his eyes as if in exhaustion, turning his head away, ignoring his father. Did he think he was ashamed of him? Elrond suddenly realised that he could only heal the part he needed to tonight if he acted fast enough. Sliding a slender hand under Elladan's chin, he gently turned his head and looked over him once more. Elladan didn't even look at him.
'My son, look at me'. He waited a while but the command was soon acknowledged, he searched deep into his sons eyes trying to find some sort of answer, but all he could find was grief and despair. He son wasn't giving up was he?
Heart betting slowly faster, Elrond probed further. 'Tell me, why do you despair? Why can you not look at me in the eye?' No answer, as expected. 'Come, lets go inside.' But Elladan wouldn't budge. Growling under his breath, he was begging to wish his son hadn't inherited his stubbornness.
Deciding that it was too cold form them to be sitting on a stone path, he tried to pull his son off the floor, but that was to no avail either. So, Elrond took the healer approach. 'Look, sitting out here in the blasted cold won't help you nor me, and it won't help whatever you are ailing from, now please, can we get inside and try to sort this out?'
He managed to hold back a whoop when Elladan began to think sensibly. Elrond tried not to cry himself as he took in how frail and small his son actually looked now. Tucking his arm under Elladan's he hoisted him up and turned him around so they were both facing each other.
Elrond could see the silent tears falling once more, and with a gentle hand he wiped them free from his face. Smiling softly to himself, he couldn't remember the last time when he had fused over Elladan so much.
Dark eyelashes fluttered and a defeated sigh left Elladan's mouth. His shoulders dropped a little, but he managed to bring himself to look at his father once more. 'He will never forgive me, I tried to kill someone, made him look like a fool, and now, I'm sure he thinks I hate him. Everyone tries so hard but I push them away, I always do. I'm never going to help Estel this way. I'm killing myself, and if anyone finds out.' Resolution finally hit him. Elladan couldn't care if he died, he had promised his littlest brother that he would die protecting him, and that is exactly what he was going to do. No matter what.
With a bit more reason to carry on now, Elladan looked his father in his eyes once more with further strength and smiled lightly when his father gasped. Grinning now, Elladan thought he had better start to say his apologies. 'Ada, I…'
'Speak no more of it tonight. You will rest now. But until then, nothing is to be said to anyone.'
Throwing his arms around his father's neck, he nuzzled to his chest and relaxed into the warmth, sleep evaded Elladan's' senses and with no control over his body anymore, he fell limp into his father's chest in a light sleep. 'No matter what happens Estel, I will protect you'.
Elrond drew his son into a tighter hold as he felt him sleep and knew that this time, it was genuine. Scooping him up and deciding that his back could not do this anymore, first Elrohir and now Elladan, he made a mental note to leave all the lifting to Glorfindel. He had chased his sons for about a millennia, but now, he will let them do the chasing.
'No matter what happens Estel, I will protect you'. A cloudy figure sat on the roof of Imladris and took in the surroundings. Once he was able to touch, able to smell the things he took for granted. But most of all he missed the warmth he felt when his brother's were around and the herbal smell that entered his senses every time Elrond was near. But now…
'Look at me, oh wait you BLOODY CAN'T'. But those words Elladan thought, why was he able to hear them? Why now? Why couldn't he hear any other thoughts? Why just his? Deciding that this whole thing hurt his head, Estel lay down his ghostly hands pillowing his head, and gazed at the stars. After a while they soon began to dance and grow larger and larger, spiral around him and then stop. Blackness soon creeped into the corner of his eyes and then enveloped his sight completely.
He felt as if he was falling, falling from somewhere, into something, then everything was bright again. He still felt cold, but he was able to feel the soft ground underneath him, he ached, but he was happy, he was alive. But then the feeling of detachment appeared once more and he felt himself falling again. 'No matter what happens Estel, I will protect you'.
'What is happening now?' With a jerk, he was brought back into the light again, and he looked down at his hands, turning them around, but his heart sank when he could seen the grassy floor underneath them. His breath caught in his throat when he saw his body, his own body in front of him, broken and defeated. All of this was too familiar, all too familiar.
A sudden pain erupted through his spine and elevated into his head. He gasped in agony and clutched the sides of his head trying to keep the pain in one place and stop moving. He felt as if a hand had clasped itself around his lungs and were slowly squeezing them shut. Again, the darkness began to tug at the corners of his eyes, but this time he was determined to stay here, he wanted to keep searching for an answer.
He shakily stood and stared down at his body, he tried to remember something, something must have caused this. With the pain still running havoc around his body, Estel stood there, still and unmoving and after a while the pain subsided, but a greater one made itself known.
Images of the past shot in front of his eyes, and with each on a new fresh jolt of something similar to electricity ran through his veins, and slowly he fell to the floor.
That was when Elladan dashed over to his brother, knocking over a few people in the process, and… took the brunt of the force.
…it actually shocked him to see what his brother was doing, was he crying? Taking a few shuffles forward to get a better look. He wish he hadn't, Elladan was really crying, and was truly upset.
Estel's head was spinning and all he could hear was his brother's voice repeating the phrase that hurt him to hear; 'No matter what happens Estel, I will protect you'. He wished that he had never wanted to remember, never even dared to think what and why it had happened. He didn't want to see all this, he truly didn't.
'There is nothing to be sorry for gwandur nin. What's done is done. At least you know your limitations now.' But there was more to forgive than he could ever dream of. If he had accepted the advice, took it and regarded his limitations, then he wouldn't be like this, and still his brothers forgive him. It just didn't make sense. The pain lessened a bit, and Estel found he was able to stand, he looked around and saw that he was in a familiar forest, the sun descending behind the mountains and leaving a red and orange hue in the sky. He could feel the cool breeze of night over passing him. He took a quick look around and gasped at what he saw.
As like in a film, he watched in slow motion as a man walked up behind his napping brother, grab him by the hair and drag him over the rock he was leaning on, placing the cold steel of a sword under his neck. He felt like going over there and showing that guy who's brother he was messing with. But found he was unable to, no matter how much he pulled he still couldn't move, and so, was forced to watch. Watch as his brother's fell to a demise that was actually his fault. 'Is this the way of the Valar's punishment to me? Killing me inside?' But all that kept his gaze was the fact that Elladan never took in his situation but always kept a watchful eye over his human self.
The world spun in a blur of colours and the next thing he knew he was standing behind Edomir and watched as Elladan raced towards him and smashed into him, taking them both to the floor. Looking to left as if on cue, he saw Edomir's men advance on his brother, Estel yelled and hollered, but his brother never heard him. He felt more than a little useless.
He watched as they dragged him backwards and watched the anger in his face, but a glint of sadness touched his eyes, as Estel watched Elladan lay eyes on his former self. 'He will protect me, no matter what'.
Without warning, a shooting pain creeped up his arm and lingered there, it felt as if his arm was slowly being torn apart from the inside, and in his agony, he spun and again his eyes fell on his Elven brother, grappling with a wolf, and his arm inside the wolf's jaw. Again, he saw his former self defeated, but this time awake. Tears welled up in his eyes, and he let them fall. He had caused all this pain. He didn't even know how to erase it. Though this whole memory seemed to focus on the horror of the wolf and nothing more. What as it about this wolf? Dreams like this didn't occur without a reason. Then another thought crossed his mind.
He had seen Elladan collapse in his bedroom, he had noticed how weak the elf and slowly become, and the outburst in the courtyard topped the list. His brother was dying, and he didn't want anyone to know, anyone to help. The image of his brother trying to help Elrohir slowly faded and it was replaced by Elladan on top of him and beating his chest.
Not able to keep the tears back no longer, Elladan cried freely, and his attempts to call his brother back fell on deaf ears. Pitching forward so his head rested on Aragorn's, he continued to sob. Through his tears he managed to hiccup 'sorrys' over and over, until he couldn't't no more. Clearing his vision somewhat, he began to thump Estel's chest. 'Wake up. Don't leave us. Estel…please…'. Becoming to weak to continue due to the stress and blood loss, he slumped forward with a sigh of defeat.
That was all Estel could take and with a yell he cried out 'Don't you think I have seen enough…I remember now, all of it, and wish none of this happened. NONE OF IT'. With a quieter voice he added, 'I don't want my brother to die… not for me. Not for me'. His sobs over took him and finding himself too weak, he decided that he just couldn't do it any more.
Estel crumbled to the floor, unaware he was on top of his body. He slowly melted into it, still crying. But when every part of him had descended, the whole form of Estel rose up, awake and healed. He walked over to three grieving beings in front of him. He looked in the direction they were and slowly backed away. Carved into a tree trunk was the name he never wished he had seen, 'Elladan'. He looked back at the beings and cried out, one of them had the same appearance as him…it was him. Elladan died to save him? This couldn't happen. He wouldn't let it.
He ran from the image, and fell onto a grassy patch. There he lied there for how long, he didn't know but then it hit him. The wolf. The pain. The deteriation. He knew what he had to do. He just had to get back inside his body.
A soft swirl of white encircled around him and before he knew it, he was back on the roof, glancing at the stars. He grasped the railing of the roof, and peered over the courtyard. He saw the last Elrond's red robes fall into the doorway, and then Estel knew, he had to find Elrohir. And quick.
Elrohir sat his normal chair, and again, lazily stretched out and then curled back into the soft grey chair of his. His dark grey eyes fell onto the back of his father, who was staring down at Elladan and swiping away the fine whips of hair, that fell onto his son's closed eyelids. Elrohir had wanted or tried to tell Elrond about Edomir, but every time he tried to get his father's attention it was always drawn elsewhere. His father had become detached, and that was one thing that the family didn't want right now.
Elrohir once again, made himself comfortable, for some reason, he just couldn't sit right. He had a weird tingling feeling in his body. Then in an act of curiosity, he peeled himself out of the chair, not even garnering a look from his father and carelessly spilt the water that was in the flower pot. The person he knew he was sensing appeared at his side and grimaced at the mess on the floor. It cast him a look as if to say 'you didn't did you'? Giving a hearty laugh, he left the room after being ushered out by the ghost and whispered at. What he wouldn't be able to take in is what his father and the ghost had to tell him next.
Elrond knew his son had left the room, and he couldn't blame him. He really wasn't in the uplifted mood he was usually in. he took another uneasy glance at Elladan and found it hard to pull his gaze away. He just he had noticed his son's illness earlier, had found a cure earlier, but no matter how hard he looked, he couldn't find anything quite in the description. Sighing and turning to look out of the window, he felt the cold air blow his hair gently and silently wished that his wife was here with him once again, things had been so much simpler that way.
He was still listening to the soothing sounds of the night when he felt his Elladan's arm move from under his hand. He turned and gave a light smile. In return he was given a grimace. Elladan tried to raise, using his sore arm to ease him upwards, but it soon gave way underneath him. Offering help, Elrond eased his son, and leaned him up against the headboard.
They sat like that in silence for a few moments, once draining warmth and security, the other regaining his peace of mind. But Elrond soon broke the silence. 'Elladan, are you up for telling me what is going on now?' He heard his son sigh heavily and finally knew that his barriers were down and Elrond could get some answers from his son, but they were far from what he had expected.
'Ada, I…I didn't mean to. But, that man… he, he'. Elrond could see that Elladan was having some trouble getting everything out, he sat closer to his son and placed a comforting hand on his arm, silently telling Elladan that he would wait, until he was ready. 'Ada, that man, he was…responsible, for what…what happened to Estel.'
Elladan watched as Elrond's colour faded and the soft hand withdrew. He watched as his father done what he usually did when he was stressed, rubbed the bridge of his nose and grumble to himself. Elrond got up and made his way to the door. Thinking that his father was going to do something rash, like he had done, Elladan swiftly threw back the covers and jumped out of bed. Which, was one of the most stupid things he could have ever done.
Elrond didn't expect what he had just been told and was more than surprised. He got up to pace, and was about to admonish Elladan when he rushed out of bed in haste as well but never got a chance to. He watched as his son swayed and fall to the floor on his knees. Elrond bent down to pick Elladan up but was pushed back rather harshly by the one he thought was weak.
He was about to bend down once more, but stopped as his son heaved violently one the floor and fell into a coughing fit. He watched with fear as Elladan bent forward on his knees and supported himself with one hand. He listened as his son choked and didn't do anything for his was too gob smacked. He was too afraid to move. A gurgling sound came from Elladan's mouth and Elrond stared down in absolute horror when Elladan's hand came away from his mouth stained red.
He watched as Elladan raised his head in and looked up to his father portraying emotions just like Elrond's; fear, confusion and surprise. Though Elrond was quick to move when Elladan's whole frame began to tremble, and the gentle eyes he had become so used to being open soon rolled back and were shut behind eyelids once more. He caught his son just before he touched the ground and drew him into his lap.
Elladan's pulse was too fast, the red tinge on his lips were the only colour on his face and shone fiercely against the now paler complexion and a cold sweat formed on his forehead. But the most worrying thing at all was that the lump on his son's arm had burst and was weeping with a sickly green and yellow colour.
Hugging him closer and weeping, Elrond started when a soft voice uttered grief behind him. 'No..'. Elrond looked behind him and saw Elrohir. He lowered his head slowly as the tears consumed him. He was going to lose two sons. And a third if the other two do fade.
Elrohir was in happy mood, but now that changed when the ghost had summoned him outside, he was rather anticipating what he was going to say. The ghost before him kept his eyes to the floor and seemed to be more depressed than before. When he was about to address the being before him, the ghost's head shot up and began speaking. 'Elrohir, you need to help me get into my body now. If not then something bad will happen. I mean it. I had this dream, this vision, what ere you want to call it. But our brother dies, Elrohir.'
The elf hadn't expected that and in his worry he shouted out 'No, it can't be your lying. You just want to get back sooner. I know you do. You're selfish, that's all that you are'. He took a deep breath and opened the door to his brother's bedroom. 'Now, please, come back when you are the Estel I used to know'.
Elrohir felt sorry for the ghost, snapping like that, but he couldn't help it, he was going through so many emotions. He couldn't handle it, and when Elladan finally broke, he knew he wouldn't be able to hold on without his brother's support, he couldn't do this all alone. He edged his way in and scanned the room when he couldn't see wither his brother or his father, then he saw the top of Elrond's head peeping over the edge of the bed and made his way over. But then his worse fears were confirmed.
In front of him lay his brother, pale withdrawn, rested on his fathers lap. The natural aurora around him was dimming and deep inside, the connection he had was his brother, he cold feel tugging and pulling a little. Searching deep inside, Elrohir almost screamed out when he couldn't find his brother's thoughts. Him and Elladan were always able to read each other's minds, but now…the connection was gone and that only meant one thing. One thing he never dared to think. Instead of screaming, he uttered a simple word in a teary, stuttering voice 'No'.
So? What ye all think? Good, Bad? R & R and tell me! Thanks to all my reviewers so far!