Disclaimer: I don't own Pern. I do, however own most of the characters in this story.

Chapter Four: Together on the Beach

Nairyry slept fitfully, tossing and turning. Her dreams were disturbed, of strange places she never could have thought of on her own. The Hold, or Holds, were strange, enormous and wide-open. There were no fire lizards, dragons or even watch-whers. The buildings were huge, made of glass and metal and the same strange stone, cut unbelievably flat and squared.

Strange trees, much greener than any she had seen, sparsely lined some of the streets. Dead, tall, branchless trees had black lines strung between them. Most of this place was made of the same weird rock, or metal or glass or the new Aivas-retrieved 'plastic' material.

Then, in a large patch of green, she found peace in all the hustle and bustle of people and strange, moving things they seemed to ride in. This place, a forest it seemed was lovely. Unconsciously she looked around as if to imprint it in her mind as coordinates.

Her last hours of sleep were undisturbed as she continued to dream of the little green patch.

In fact, in the morning she still had the image of it firmly in her mind.

000

Thyrath rumbled happily as her rider spread oil on her itching hide. Nairyry grinned at her dragon and slapped the gold's thick hide affectionately. "At least I know there won't be more of you to oil ever again."

"Quite a good thing, too." She jumped and turned. "Sorry," added W'lam as he dropped to the beach's sand from the log he had been standing on. Jurcath must have landed far enough up the long low-tide beach, nearly in the Southern forests, from the queen dragon and her rider for Nairyry to not notice. The bronze was deep in the sand, blinking green and blue at them. She pulled a face and spread another handful of oil on Thyrath's neck, back near the shoulder.

"Sometimes I wish you were a green, you know," she told the dragon, and scratched the itch the queen directed her to. "It's not as if this world needs more dragons from your clutches."

"She looks splendid today, Nyr." W'lam bowed to the gold dragon and took some oil when the other rider offered the jar." They stopped to watch as several fire lizards, some bronzes, blue and browns but only one green, leapt into they sky. Nairyry's fire lizard looked and crooned as the green dove to the sea and landed on the shore with a fish in her talons. "What-" started Nairyry, then went stiff.

The wild green ate ferociously. In a sudden moment she flung her small frame into the sky and the males were after her. "A mating flight!" whispered Nairyry. She turned as swiftly as an earth cobra and glared at bronze Chilfer. "Don't you dare! Absolutely not!"

Her fire lizard looked back at the dwindling specks of his wild kin and hissed at his human, spreading his wings. Nairyry, desperate, dove at the bronze and grabbed him. She pinned his wings to his sides.

"No. No, no, no, no, no, no, NO. You are staying right here." When the fire lizards were out of sight she released him and stood. Though she didn't notice, she was dead white and breathing in a very controlled rhythm. W'lam looked at her in concern.

"It's only you and me here. And Chilfer is fast," she explained, eyes haunted, voice was ragged and hoarse. She looked away and leaned against her dragon's side. She had discussed in detail, all the while red as if she had been left to sit in a barrel of redwort for a sevenday, the process of a mating flight. Nairyry knew she would delay that as long as possible. All she could hope for was a decent bronze with a decent rider to catch her and her dragon.

"No. Not-" she shuddered, drawing a deep breath and sank to the sand, one hand still wrapped around as much of her dragon's leg as possible. "Not like that. Not Chilfer and a wild green."

Thyrath rumbled consolingly and twisted her head around to nuzzle her rider. W'lam continued to oil her dragon, having nothing to say that would comfort her. She was clearly terrified by the thought of Thyrath rising.

Nairyry started to get up, then fell against her gold's leg, a sob tearing from her throat. W'lam dropped the oil and came over to her. He put a hand on her shoulder consolingly, then held her in his arms and she let him hold her and rock her until she was cried out.

"I'm sorry," she whispered brokenly. "I just don't know the bronze riders well enough to let it be wonderful. And if I can't, then…" She broke off, and looked up in his face.

"Was that what happened? When- when Jurcath caught the green?" she asked hesitantly.

He stiffened, then relaxed and held her slightly tighter to his chest as he remembered. "Yes. For me it was wonderful. But for Tai… it was her Zaranth's second flight. The rider whose dragon had first caught hers had been cruel, ruthless, even when she accepted him. She expected that, and resisted the next time. Jurcath and I… that day with couldn't see for the wonder of that green's flight."

W'lam shuddered and closed his eyes, a flash of sorrow and pain coming across his face. He looked down at Nairyry, still holding her to him. At the same moment they became painfully aware of how they sat, how much their bodies touched. She looked, startled and pulled away as if to preserve their dignity, but W'lam only resettled his arms around her to a more comfortable position, a strange look on his face as he held her to him.

"No," he whispered, his eyes now painful, hopeful and pleading. "No, stay. Stay- with me." He bent towards her.

Nairyry's eyes grew wide and she opened her mouth to say something. Before she could W'lam kissed her gently on her lower lip, lingering sweetly. She went stiff and pulled her head away, then pushed against his chest, forcing him back. The goldrider stood shakily and ran, stumbling, over to her dragon. She swiftly climbed Thyrath's shoulder and settled herself into the saddle. Nairyry urged her dragon to take her back to the weyr, not knowing there were tears running down her face.

Instead Thyrath rumbled and settled into the sand. "What are you doing?" she all but cried. The queen turned her head, eyes whirling blue and green, to look at W'lam, who stood, one hand on her large shoulder, reaching the other to the rider.

Thyrath twisted herself so that her rider was lower, near the Weyrsinger. "No!" sobbed Nairyry, closing her eyes and clenching her fists as she collapsed along her dragon's neck.

"Nyr." The Weyrsinger's voice was soft. "Please look at me, Nyr." He put a hand on her back and turned her face towards him with the other. Gazing into her eyes he saw in them, for the first time, fear.

Fear of him.

But more, there was longing and sorrow, and an old, old grief, buried deep long ago and dug up again now.

He reached up and gathered her in his arms and lowered her gently to the ground, though she held onto her dragon's saddle with one hand until he gently pried it loose. She went limp and all but cowered from him as he knelt beside her. Tears ran down her face from under her closed eyes.

"What happened, Nyr?" he asked her, gently laying his hand along her cheek. "What do you remember? It was long ago, wasn't it?" He lay back beside her, and gently slid one arm under her, and one arm over, encircling her. She curled in on herself, drawing her knees up. Her dragon settled, comfortable, and laid her head next to the two humans.

W'lam pulled the gold's rider closer to him, and let his body touch hers ever so slightly. She swallowed.

"It was before I came to the Harper Hall," she began softly, looking into the distance, in the sky above them. "I didn't have Chilfer yet. I lived with my family; we were at Ruatha then, before they moved South. I was exploring in the lower levels, and must have gotten dirty enough to pass for a drudge. A man found me down there." She stopped, a sob shaking her body for a minute before she could continue.

"He- he took me into an empty room. I didn't want to go with him but he said my mother wanted me to see it. He closed the door then turned on me. The man forced me down to the ground and-" she choked again. "He held me, just- just like you did, but not so gently." Her voice shook as she struggled to speak normally. "Then- then he pulled me to the ground and-" she stopped and took a calming breath. "I had eleven Turns."

Nairyry wiped her eyes with the back of her hand and looked into W'lam's eyes. "Is a mating flight any different at all?" she asked bitterly, pushing against him again, and glared at him. "Is love?" Now her voice cracked.

"Love is very different, Nyr," he told her softly, pulling her close, and pressed his lips to hers. This time she responded to him, timidly and uncertainly, but nonetheless she responded. When he tightened his hold on her, unconsciously turning sideways so he lay partially on top of her she gasped and struggled, trying to escape. Slowly he loosened his arms around her, looking into her eyes so she could see he understood.

He kissed her softly once more, feeling her trembling, and let her go. Nairyry sat up slowly, holding her knees to her chest, and looked down at the sand. Then she took a deep, shuddering breath and let it out slowly. W'lam sat up too, and held her again. She dried her eyes fully, then looked back at him. She hesitated a moment.

"Thank you," she whispered finally. "I- well, I sort of see now– I couldn't before, not clearly. I suppose I was frightened… but you aren't the only one who had to wait to express yourself." She smiled shakily at him. "I haven't been able to come out and say or do- anything. With you. He changed me, that man. I don't think I could have ever let you know even if I realized it myself. I mean– I sort of did, but I never really admitted it to myself…"

W'lam kissed her again. When she responded, he deepened the kiss, holding her to him. She hesitantly put her arms around his neck. When they slowly broke off for air she smiled hesitantly at her teacher, comrade and newly-found lover. The bronzerider brushed Nairyry's hair out of her face and cupped her cheek in his hand. She leaned into it, eyes closed, until he brushed his lips to hers. Once more nothing mattered, except that they were together.

When Jurcath rumbled, coming over to settle next to Thyrath, Nairyry suddenly stiffened and jerked away. W'lam looked at her, puzzled, as she closed her eyes and leaned against him. Then he knew what it was, why the dragons had upset her again.

"Her mating flight?" he asked with quiet certainty. She shivered, though the sun beat down on them, nodded and huddled together with him.

"Even if it is Jurcath, what of me? Of us?" she asked. "I just don't know what it will be like, really. I can't think-"

He silenced her with a brief kiss.

"If it is Jurcath who catches Thyrath… we'll just take things as they come," he whispered in her ear, and leaned her back to the sand for another kiss as she clung to him with all the strength of her desperate, painful hope.