KP – One Oh One: Part XXXIII – Spinning Teacups of Doom

Turnabout was supposed to be fair play.

Try telling that to a certain red haired teen hero while she was busy losing her lunch while her fiancé carefully held her hair out of the way.

Normally, for a woman who could sometimes be called an adrenaline junkie, an amusement park, especially one of the premier locations in the world, held a very special attraction. The rides offered her the chance to experience a taste of the thrills she normally faced in her life and, unless you counted waiting in lines, she didn't have to do the heavy lifting to experience them.

So far, there hadn't been a ride invented she couldn't ride. After all, she climbed mountains, jumped out of planes, sometimes even without a parachute. Carefully calculated application of multiple Gs were fun, but certainly didn't scare her. It didn't matter if the ride went around and around or if it were the fastest, roughest roller coaster ever built. None of them affected her in the least. Oh, she screamed, but that was part of the fun. Normally, when she was in a position to experience massive accelerations, she was all business and sometimes had to be sneaky about it. None of that applied when barreling down a hill.

Ron, on the other hand, could pretty much handle the coasters, but if he spent too much time on the 'spinny' rides, he was prone to lose anything that happened to be in his stomach. That wasn't to say he hated those rides. On the contrary, he loved riding them as much or more than Kim. There was something about riding something that teams of engineers had put together to simulate a feeling of danger, all the while knowing it was actually safer than riding his bike down the sidewalk. He would literally ride the things until he chucked.

Fortunately for him, there were plenty of breaks between 'extreme rotating' events. Specifically, it was the waiting in line, giving his stomach plenty of time to settle between rides. In fact, the flight down had done more to turn him green than the dozens of rides at Fantasy World.

They managed to swing tickets on a redeye out of Middleton. It was a smaller jet, so it was basically all coach, but the plane was only a quarter full so they were able to stretch out without cramping any of the other passengers. The plane lifted off in the early hours of December 23rd, so they spent the flight contentedly snoozing. They connected through Atlanta, this time boarding a 'puddle jumper' with only twenty seats. They were glad of the rest they had on the earlier flight, as the plane was full and, as it turned out, Kim and Ron were the smallest passengers on board by far. A quick best of three round of rock/paper/scissors won Kim the window seat, which she immediately gave to Ron, who in turn tried to give it back, but she insisted she won it fair and square and it was up to her to decide who would sit in it.

That in itself wasn't such a bad thing. She ended up sitting beside a fairly large fellow from a city to the north, on his way down to Orlando to visit his brother and his new fiancé. They struck up a conversation about his former job as a bike mechanic and his current profession as a novelist and part time computer handyman. She found that once he got rolling about bikes, it was fascinating, though she had utterly no idea what a Deore XT Equipped cross country rig was, or why he liked Japanese road bike components as opposed to Italian ones, but he spoke with such fervor it never truly got boring. He reminded her a lot of a younger man who had saved her life earlier that year. Of course, when he started in on his writing work her eyes about rolled back in her head.

He wrote science fiction novels. She could sit and watch Sci-Fi movies all day long with Ron, but that was because she enjoyed watching him have a good time doing it. The thought of actually sitting down and reading a book on the subject? She had plenty of that with her last high school English teacher, thank you very much!

Poor Ron didn't fare quite so well. There was a Bueno Nacho Express in the Atlanta Airport, so he got into his usual eating contest with Rufus to see who could actually down their own weight in Breakfast Nacos in the quickest time. They figured they had enough time before they set down in Orlando that he wouldn't have a problem with the rides once they got into the park.

Unfortunately, the heavily laden plane was much more at the mercy of turbulence than the medium size jet they had been on. How he managed to keep those egg, cheese and tortilla laden creations down, Kim had no idea, though by the time they landed he was a shade of green that would have done a powered-up Shego proud.

They were in for another shock that, while it wasn't completely unexpected, hit them quite a bit harder than they figured. When they got on the plane in Colorado, the temperature was well below freezing. They boarded directly from the terminal, but they still needed long clothes and sweaters. Atlanta was warmer, but only by about ten degrees, so they were still relatively comfortable there with their sweaters tied around their shoulders.

When they climbed off the plane in Orlando, it was like stepping into a steam bath. It was in reality a comfortable seventy five degrees, but the humidity still hit them like a ton of bricks. As soon as they had their luggage in hand they made a bee-line for the resort hotel they were spending the night in and quickly changed into shorts, Kim electing to wear a nice sports bra instead of the longer T-shirts they brought. The original plan was for them to dress alike in Ron's signature outfit, just as they had the first day of school, but that was out of the question.

They got into the park by the early afternoon. With only the one day there was utterly no chance of seeing it all, so they decided their best course of action was to hit the high spots, meaning the better rides.

Kim, who had eaten half of an egg and mushroom burrito, was ravenously hungry, though Ron was still not quite done recovering from their flight. The first eatery they spotted as they wandered the outskirts of the sprawling complex was distinctly Tex-mex. In hindsight, they should have passed on that and found something else.

"You have got to be kidding me." Ron said, squinting at the menu board. "A 'Tacho?' Half taco, half nacho?"

"Sounds gross, doesn't it?" Kim remarked, hunting for something that at least sounded palatable.

"No, it sounds like I need to call the head honcho at BN. That's nothing but a rip-off."

Kim looked at him for a moment then realized what he meant. She was so hungry it didn't sink in immediately that was exactly what a Naco was. She laughed gently. "I'm willing to bet they're well aware of it, but don't want to go up against these people's legal department. You remember what they did to that fan-site for that cartoon you watch every day."

"Come on, KP. We'd better find something else. If I even touch any of this stuff there's bound to be a picture on the internet within five minutes. Can you imagine what it would be like for the Naco Boy to be seen eating a Tacho?"

"Give it a rest, Ron. I'm just going to have a chicken Taco, and you're not supposed to be eating anything right now anyway."

He grumbled some more and walked outside, sitting at one of the umbrella covered tables. The line was ferociously long, with dozens of park goers still vying for a bite of lunch, but she decided to be patient. Ron was still in a little bit of a funk when she came out bearing something oozing grease and an extraordinarily small diet pop.

She started wondering if Ron was actually right when she unwrapped what was supposed to be grilled chicken in a flour tortilla. It turned out that he was as she swallowed the first bite. Her drink, which cost as much as a sixty-four ounce grande-sized Slurpster back home, if she bought it along with a Naco platter, turned out to be extremely watery and filled to the top with ice to boot. Still, her hunger overrode her distaste and she finished the small repast as quickly as she could.

"This is so ferociously weird." Kim observed as they strolled through the park holding hands.

"Wuzzat?" Ron licked his chops as they passed a food vendor with sizzling onions and peppers, with huge rings of kielbasas warming nearby.

"Christmas is two days away, this whole place is done up like some kind of winter wonderland, and we're both wearing shorts and about to break out in a sweat from the humidity."

"Count your blessings, Kimbo. The guy at the airport said it was in the high forties here a couple days ago, and it's going to be warmer down in Fort Summerdell. So, what's first? Spook Mansion? Swashbucklers of the Caribbean? Oh, I know, we could go to the kiddie rides and do the original Spinning Tops of Doom. That's where I got the name!"

"I thought you wanted to ride Supersonic Mountain so bad?"

"Well, I was reading the travel guide on the way to the airport. It said the ride was built in the seventies and it's pretty tame. I was thinking more along the lines of The Mangler."

"Oy, is there a major ride here that doesn't sound like one of our enemy's doomsday machines?"

"Well, there's plenty…and I was the one who built the Mangler, not Drakken."

"So not the drama, Ron. Let's find this 'Mangler' before we burn up the whole afternoon."

The lines for the rides proved to be rather impressive, but being a well established park, the operators knew how to keep things moving along. Being used to the smaller portable rides at the sporadically open Middleton Fairgrounds, Fantasy World was actually a pretty refreshing change for the couple. The rides were bigger and the park looked a lot more…complete. After a couple hours Kim's stomach was rumbling again, so she stopped and bought a chili dog (noting they had already spent as much for carnival snack food as they would a nice steak dinner for one back home.)

"I thought for a moment you were going to order that with marshmallows back there." Ron grinned. Kim could tell his mouth was watering, watching her eat the meat sauce enshrouded sausage.

"Nah, I don't want to gross anybody out. Besides, there's no good way to toast the marshmallows anyway, and I'd feel a little freaky going into one of the gift shops to buy a disposable lighter."

"Maybe you could turn down the power on your laser lipstick?"

"Hmm. Didn't think of that." She handed the last inch of the hot dog to Rufus, who took it down in one gulp. Kim pinched his cheek softly. "We'll get you some food at dinner tonight, I'll even let you pick the place."

"Booyah!" He cheered softly. "I know just the place too. All you can eat Seafood Buffet!"

"Spankin. Come on, I saw something cool!"

They rode an older ride that started out spinning in circle on the ground, then rose up into the air. They rode one of the spinning swing rides that Ron used to say would make him chuck. There was a roller coaster where their legs hung down beneath them, another with traditional cars but an incredibly rough and tumble ride. There were spinning barrels, spinning wagon wheels. Spinning this, and spinning that. All the while Kim kept getting hungry, eating nachos with jalapeños on top, a big roasted turkey leg and a big poof of cotton candy, taking full advantage of Ron's proclaimed rule of there being no such thing as a diet in a place like that.

She was so proud of how Ron was handling it, even though he did sneak a couple bites of her nachos, she didn't feel it starting. In fact, all the coasters and spinning rides didn't seem to have any affect on her. It wasn't until they got on the boat for Swashbucklers of the Caribbean that she started getting an inkling of what was to come.

The first thing that hit her was just how unpleasant the water actually smelled. It wasn't bad, bad, but it was just enough to make her wonder how often they changed out the water in the artificial canal the boat traveled through. It also didn't help that the seat was warm and quite wet. She knew the short drop at the end of the ride always got the riders wet, but that was a quick spray of cold water. Sitting in a lukewarm puddle made her think it could be something else.

The boat itself was exactly that. It ran down between some guides, but it still floated in the channel. That meant it would bob ever so slightly. She couldn't quite pinpoint why it was she could ride roller coasters all day long, sit in the spinning rides until the cows came home, but sitting in what really was a pretty stable boat started making her just a little queasy. It was dark enough in there that Ron didn't notice how green she was turning, instead keeping his hand around her waist, even letting it slip just inside the band of her shorts. It was amazing how something she usually enjoyed quite a bit was so distracting when she was trying to keep her extended lunch down.

This can't be happening to me! This happens to Ron! The last time I hurled was…ew, that time I was drunk!

She made it through the ride somehow. The fact she really had missed the whole thing by concentrating on her predicament did take her mind of it momentarily. Once they were clear of the ride and the slightly musty water smell, she improved rapidly. A few minutes later she put her hand on Ron's waist, putting her pinky inside the band.

"What next, KP?"

"How about something simple. You know when they used to have the Wonderful World of the Mouse on Sunday nights and they would show shots of this park?"

"Yeah."

"Well, ever since I was a little girl, I always wanted to ride those little tea-cups."

"Aw, come on, KP. That's for little kids."

"Pweeze Wonnie?"

He tried to look away, but it was too late. The bottom lip came out. Her eyes got big as saucers and her shoulders scrunched up around her face. She knew he could resist the Puppy Dog Pout when it was something really important, or was keeping a surprise for her, but in an instance like this, he was utterly and totally powerless.

"Oh, okay, but we're going to ride the Decimator next."

"Booyah!" Kim smiled at him, then gave him a tiny little kiss on his earlobe.

The Teacup ride was in fact made for small kids after all and even though Kim was a rather petite woman, she was pretty cramped in it, but the operator offered no objection to the two of them getting on it. Apparently there always seemed to be somebody like Kim who never got their chance to ride it when they were little.

What she never expected was just how fast the ride felt. Or was it just the fact her stomach wasn't as settled as she thought. Then there was the smell of a bad diaper that wafted past her, plus her bottom was still damp and sticking to her backside.

Then Ron started going on about snow crab legs. Cracking them, pulling out the spine and dipping them in warm dripping butter. Any other time that would have set Kim's mouth to watering. Instead, she could feel her gorge rising. It took every bit of her will to keep it down. By the time the ride came to an end, it was obvious even to him that something was terribly wrong with Kim.

She sat down on a brick wall, putting her head between her knees. Ron rubbed her back between her shoulders, not knowing what else to do. He knew that when he got that way, he felt terrible until he got it out of him, but he wasn't going to offer that piece of advice to Kim.

"How is this happening to me?" She whined, looking up slightly.

"Could it be some of that junk you ate?"

"Oh, Ronnie, don't remind me." She gagged slightly. "I don't even want to think of food right now."

Kim looked up again and noticed a little girl of about five looking right at her. "Hey, you're Kim Popsicle, aren't you?"

Normally she got a little laugh out of kids mangling her name like that. Yet all she could manage was a weak "Uh huh."

"You wanna bite?" She held up a half-eaten corn dog, though instead of being covered in yellow mustard, it looked (and smelled) like it had mayonnaise on it. That was it, the straw that broke the camel's back.

Fortunately, Ron was right, though she didn't know it. Once she had most of that garbage food out of her, she felt almost completely better. Still, she was embarrassed almost to tears.

While she had been leaning over the garbage can, she head another kid say "Hey, it's KIM POSSIBLE! And boy is she SICK!"

a/n Thanks to Captainkodak1 for some suggestions for this chapter. In fact, the last line is actually his. Check out his latest; Tunnel Vision and get set to get wet!

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