KP – One Oh One: Part XXXVIII – Let the Festivities Commence
The moment Kim got up that morning, she knew something was wrong. What was worse, she knew exactly what the problem was and that there really wasn't anything she could do about it. Oh, a little bit of it could have been the extended tickle fight she had with Ron the afternoon before. It could have been the chili-dogs they shared at Muddrakker's. Only, she knew better.
Kim pretty much went through puberty right as her 'real' missions got under way. True, she never 'blossomed' much body-wise, but other womanly issues began at that time as well. With those issues came certain problems her mother came to associate with her rather adventurous lifestyle. All the odd hours, strange foods, pushing her body to its limits over and over again, they did take their toll.
The solution that Anne Possible finally found for her daughter, with the advice of the gynecologist she started going to annually, was to put her on birth control pills, not as a license for sex, but to afford her some degree of control over her cycle. To the greater extent, that seemed to work. She went from going three weeks some times, to six weeks other times, with all sorts of physiological and emotional problems thrown in with her out of whack hormones, to an almost precise cycle running every twenty-eight days.
The results, as far as she was concerned, were perfect. They gave her precisely what she wanted in all aspects of her life; control. There was also the added benefit of clearing up a slight acne problem she developed in her early teens. In her own words: Spankin!
However, nothing in the world is ever absolutely perfect. Roughly every three or four months things didn't go as smoothly as she preferred. Oh, it would still come off like clockwork, but some of the other problems would crop up. She would catch herself biting somebody's head off for no good reason, or she would start tearing up watching an action movie with Ron. Sometimes there would be headaches, others there would be cramping.
That was what she woke up with that fine Sunday morning. There was also a certain amount of tweak directed at Ron as well. This was the week they all went to church together, something they had resolved to do whenever they didn't have a mission to go on, just as on opposite weeks she would go to Temple with Ron. Lately they had taken to spending the night with each other so they could all ride as one big family without making a stop to pick anyone up. There was also the fact that they had gone on their usual Saturday night date and Kim was feeling a bit romantic and a night of cuddling would have been just the thing to make her feel better.
She was tweaked with Ron because she knew he knew better. If there was anyone in the world who could sense an impending KP-PMS event, it was he. The functioning logical side of her mind couldn't blame him. He didn't like strife, especially between them, but the more emotional side of her mind wanted to rip him a new one for being such a weenie. Wasn't it his place as her man to stand and take it so he would be in place to offer emotional support when she needed it?
Well, there would be no escape that night. They would all be up well past midnight watching the ball drop. The year before they ended up spending the whole night on the sofa. That wasn't going to happen. She would simply take him up to her room and that was going to be it. She was not going to be denied her cuddle time!
Grumbling, she slipped out of her 'Ron-shirt' and into a bath robe and headed down the stairs. At least she could take some over-the-counter medicine that would help with the cramps, if not the foul mood she was in. Again the logical side of her brain tried telling her that Ron would certainly not want to be witness to her about that moment, but the other side just reared itself asking what exactly was he going to do once they got married, or if they ended up living together before that? Was he going to have his own little special room where he could run and hide during the period before her period?
She opened the drawer and pulled out the little blue box. There were also tubes of antibiotic ointment, some rolls of bandage tape and a bottle of ibuprofen in there, all things she normally had to use in her day-to-day life. She really didn't like taking medications like this, despite the proven benefits of her other daily meds, but sometimes nature needed a little helping hand from science.
The silver and white bubble cards dropped out into her hands. She looked at the first and tossed it into the trash, then at the other…
…all empty.
With a growl she threw the rest of them into the little waste bin and stomped out of her bathroom. She knocked on her parent's door. "Mom?"
"Come on in, Kimmie." Her mother was just in the process of getting out a dress to wear to church. They normally went to the early service, hitting a restaurant for brunch afterwards, allowing everyone a little bit of extra sleep time.
"Mom, do you have any of that cramping medicine I use?"
"Is it bad, Honey?" The simple fact Kim was actually asking for medicine sent up plenty of warning flags. She wouldn't even take an aspirin unless she was near to being taken to the emergency room.
"Just enough to be annoying, plus Ron forgot that I asked him to pick me up some while he was at Smarty Mart the other day."
She tried to hide her wince. That was not good, not good at all for Ron's well being over the next couple days, especially considering New Years Eve was shaping up as a traditional Kim and Ron time. "Oh, I'm sure he just forgot, but sorry, I don't have any. I've got some Ibuprofen."
"No thanks, I've got some of that." Kim muttered incoherently as she went back to her bathroom. At least the hot shower made her feel somewhat better. She got out, thinking to herself how strange it was that she simultaneously wanted a hug from Ron and wanted to shake him until his noggin rattled.
There was a soft knock at the door, which immediately opened, admitting her mother. "Do you want to just stay home this week?"
"No, Mom, I'm just fine. I took a couple Ibus. Two days from now and I'll be just fine."
"Okay. We can always stop by the store on the way home." She offered helpfully.
Kim suddenly had the image of her whole family, Ron included, making their way down the feminine hygiene aisle at the grocery store while she picked out the particular items she needed. That is, if Jim and Tim would even be seen with their sister buying cramping medicine, tampons and pads. No, they definitely would not. Her Dad would probably hole up at the magazine rack himself until they were done.
Normally, she would simply go into the store by herself and pay for everything back at the pharmacy counter. Personal stuff for her was, well, personal. There were enough immature and intellectually challenged individuals in the world to make hay over the fact that the famous Kim Possible, teen hero was a woman like any other on the planet.
"No. I'll just make do until later. Thanks anyway."
Oh, she wouldn't be alone on that trip to the store. A certain male was going to learn the price of forgetting when he was told to pick up some things.
Ron knew he was in trouble.
He knew there were times when he could be especially dense. Spotting the subtle hints that this month was going to be a bad one for Kim wasn't one of them. Then why had he forgotten that she asked him to pick up those few things for her? Maybe it was the fact she had never done so before. That was part of the "Kim Experience" he was still not a part of, and up until she handed him the short list, he thought it would remain like that. He knew Kim needed those sorts of things, but it was something never mentioned. He would just tread lightly around her when the mood swings and other problems hit her and everything would be okay.
Maybe it was something in one of those awful women's magazines she liked. He idly glanced through them from time to time, enjoying the photography, especially some of the ads like the ones for Alexandria's Confession, but the articles he caught sometimes made him think the publishers liked talking behind men's backs. He could just imagine an article talking about 'what he would do for you if he really loves you,' suggesting a proper love partner would gladly supply the needed items when asked. Kim really didn't go in for that kind of game, but he had to wonder.
As he made his way to the back of the drug store he was thankful, for once, for being rather innocuous. The last thing he wanted was for somebody to recognize him as he ventured into that mysterious realm of women's products. Like any other red-blooded male in his late teens, he had always studiously avoided even stepping onto that aisle, a habit aided by the fact his mother stopped taking him to the grocery and drug stores when he was little, given his penchant for loading carts with junk food and candy.
The sight of that section, with all its pastel colors and bewildering array of sizes, shapes, applicators and all the other strange sundries associated with them almost did him in. In a panic he checked the list again, fearing it would only list them in general terms. He breathed a sigh of relief when he noted everything was very specific. Any more detail and Kim would have included the UPC codes as well.
It still took him a few more minutes than he was comfortable with finding her supplies. He tried not to read too much into the boxes as he loaded them into his basket. At least the store was completely modern and relied on computerized pricing. He was spared the horror of getting to the front counter and having the clerk call for a price check on a forty count box of something that was normally considered out-of-sight, out-of-mind in his book.
He checked his watch. Since he borrowed his mother's car, he had a little time to kill before he had to drive over to Kim's house. He even considered calling her and saying he'd meet her at church, but that didn't sit quite well with him so he started towards the front. That's when a certain section caught his eye.
Ron never considered the things very much. Before his relationship with Kim he wondered if he would ever actually need them and only kept their existence in the back of his mind. He remembered being embarrassed nearly to tears when, on the night of his first official real date with her the day after their Junior Prom, his father took him aside and gave him one to put in his wallet. Never in his wildest dreams did he think he would actually need it then and that had been borne out over the time they had been together, but it was still there.
He almost died when Kim found it, but as it turned out she only got a little laugh out of it when he explained its origin. She put it back without any further comment.
Still, he had no idea there was such a wide variety available. He found himself reading the front of the packages. One in particular caught his eye.
"Extra large?" He squinted at the package, which was in a special display made to hinder theft. "Somebody must have a really good opinion of themselves to buy that." He muttered, half to himself, half to Rufus, who was smacking his lips at a display of crunchy snacks hanging nearby.
The hairs on the back of his neck stood up. He could sense the looming presence even before he saw him. Slowly turning around, he came face-to-face with Steve Barkin, who, despite his protest that he never did so, was leaning over Ron's shoulder as if he were trying to see what interested the younger man so much.
"Picking up some supplies for tonight, Stoppable?"
His heart jumped into his throat. Too many years of being under the older man's watchful gaze at school left a lasting impression on what their relationship was supposed to be. In an instant, the fact he was an adult, a college student and engaged to be married to Kim was stripped away and he was once again standing in front of one of the people he least wanted thinking he needed such things.
Almost as if it were a shield, he held up his basket of selections in front of him. "I, uh, was just picking up some things for Kim."
Barkin looked in the basket, then smiled broadly. "You're a good man, Stoppable. I sure wouldn't be caught dead buying that sort of thing." He wandered off with his own basket, chuckling slightly to himself.
Ron couldn't get to the checkout fast enough.
Anne looked at the young man working with her in the kitchen, getting the snacks ready for the evening's festivities. He had done something that morning she thought was an actual impossibility for any male. It certainly had its intended effect on Kim. She went from muttering to herself and generally acting cranky to cooing all over her fiancé after the services that morning. He had practically dodged a bullet.
He was busy putting together a home-made cheese ball. Normally it would be just as simple to pick up one pre-made, but he wanted to use fresh ingredients, such as freshly chopped almonds instead of having them for a mushy crust on the outside. Good as he was, his job was complicated by a certain little pink rodent who could consume the cheese as fast as he could grate it.
He rolled the finished product in the nuts and put it on a plate with a spreading knife and a selection of crackers. She certainly hoped Rufus would behave himself long enough so the rest of them could enjoy Ron's creation. For the moment he was contenting himself on the remains of the cheddar block he had been working with earlier.
James watched as he carried the platter into the family room, where Kim and the twins were already busy watching some of the early evening programs. They would start out watching the ball drop on the East Coast, which was still just over an hour off yet, but for the better part of the evening they would all be glued to the television. There were some open-air festivities planned for downtown Middleton, but a cold drizzle had been falling for hours, putting a damper on any plans along those lines.
"I take it that Ronald isn't likely to go home tonight, is he?"
"No, and I strongly suspect, if they don't fall asleep on the sofa again, he won't be using the guest room either. Are you certain you're okay with that?"
He looked pensive for a moment. "Honestly? Not one hundred percent, but we've been down this road too many times and it's not about trusting them to make good decisions any more. After all, I am the one who gave my blessing for them to get married."
"Good man. I really don't think she's quite ready to give me a run for my money on my lung power."
"Anne!"
"I'm kidding, James. So, what brings this up? You usually just try to look the other way when they want to spend the night together."
"Well, I was thinking. We have a couple bottles of sparkling wine chilling and I know they're still technically not old enough."
Anne considered that. Neither of the kids had ever displayed any taste for alcohol. Kim was outright disgusted with the taste of beer, but she also knew the Stoppables were prone to serve a glass of wine with dinner, especially now that Kim ate with them much more often.
"I'm sure, if they want some, a glass wouldn't hurt them at midnight. You're just thinking that if he does have some, he needs to stay here anyway, aren't you."
He nodded. "Since he's staying anyway. When I was eighteen I was able to actually go out and buy a bottle, though I didn't know what I was doing and ended up with something that wasn't even fit to cook with."
"Just so long as it's one glass and none at all for the twins." She countered.
"Already have that covered." He produced a bottle of sparkling white grape juice, which was what they traditionally served the kids.
"Well, leave it in the fridge until later." She wrapped both arms around his waist. "I can think of a good use for that second bottle after midnight. Do some ringing in the new year of our own."
"Why, Miss Credible, are you suggesting I get you tipsy and have my way with you?"
She grinned at him. "I'm not suggesting anything, I'm telling you to, bad boy."
He turned around in her arms and gave her a little kiss. "What is it with this family and bossy red-heads?" he teased.
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