"I wish I was never born, all the pain I caused, my mother, my friends, what have I done, do I even have friends, Harper'slook when he saw me after he got the library inside he's mind, he was afraid, scared of me of what me and my race could do to him to others. Oh how sorry I am, maybe if I wasn't there in the first place he would've been more at peace, he might of never got to the world ship. He and Tyr wouldn't of been..."
His words were lost in the suddent darkness that surrounded him, what was this? What had happened? Where was he? Was he there back on his far away from others remote planet? He tried looking at his hands but he could see nothing, all around was nothingness, he wanted to scream but all that came out was a small whimper, so unlikely for a magog, a strong magog that was, but then again he always tried to separate himself as much as posible from his kin. Somehow he was relieved that he didn't sound more fierced.
But one tough still haunted his mind, where was he?
"Well, you asked and I answered."
"Asked what?" Rev was starting to get scared, he didn't like this voice coming from nowhere, no, not from nowhere, from the darkness, and maybe that was worst.
"Oh, what you creatures always wish with complete disregard to the fact taht sometime you might get your wish" the same voice answered.
"I didn't wish for anything" Rev sounded certain tough inside he knew better.
"Right and I'm Santa Claus. Look you got your wish you were never born and so let's leave it at that, I am tired from waiting for all of you to take the point, or was that hint?"
The voice started laughing, a not very reassuring laugh like that of Harper, he suddently started remembering the way Harper and Trance were always running around Maru like little kids with Beka screaming from the top of her lungs: "If you brake something again I'm gonna kill you both!"Only she always had that look that contradicted her words, that kind look she always got when she felt motherly...The tough made him laugh, Beka would punch him if she would ever call her motherly to her face.
He started to get even more scared, he felt that something terible had happened to his friends, but he couldn't tell what, maybe he was just going crazy.
"Yeah, you probably are!" The voice replyed again.
"Who are you? Answer me or I'll..."
"You'll what? You can't see two steps ahead and you expect me to feel any fear from you furry little freak"
This time the voice was fierce: "You are nothing but a monster, and worst than that you are a monster trying to prove that he is a good pearson, sure I bet all those people you used as snacks felt just that, you're wayst kindness"
A sarcastic laughter broke into the darkness, as the voice continued:
" Were you praying while you were preying upon them? How many lives havfe you destroyed?"
"I tryed to fight it, I ..."
''You are pathetic, you know what, I think you are nothing more that a pityfull creature, maybe I would've respected you more if you would've just sticked to what you knew instead of going all peace friendly little magog, now that's a contradiciton the highest tech computer would have trouble grasping" and the he just laughed again, a voice that the Abbys itself would've been proud of posesing.
Rev found himself silenced, in silence, silent...he could say nothing just feel the world suddently slip away, and then...
"Rapist, moster, kill him, don't Dylan, he's evil..." Harpers voice started to sound inside he's mind, he's look when he got back from the world ship, that haunted look that he was somehow guilty of putting there...Beka's voice, Trance and her misteryes, they all played inside he's mind, Tyr's distrust, his mother, those that he fed upon, they were all there, screaming at him, calling him a monster, a creature worthy of nothing, their hands were ripping his cloth, taking away his wayst chain, ripping through his flesh, feeding upon him, taking the very life out of him.
"Oh did I mention I DECIDED TO ALTER YOUR WISH? "
Again that voice, the voice of darkness, maybe it was the Abbys, Rev tought through his pain.
"Now what is it with you people and this assumption we must belong to the Abbys? I only inflicted some pain upon you and that makes me a bad guy? Well let's see, remember this little guy, he said while Rev felt compeled to look at a small child about 7 years old standing in front of him, you killed him, he "gave birth" if I may say so to three of your offsprings, more likely three of satans spawns, but I suppose it's all a matter of viewpoint. His parents didn't have the heart to kill him, so your "babies" did the job rof them, of course, they also killed his parents and about half the village/ghetto they were living in. You must be a very proud dad, I mean who can pride with the genocide comitted by his "children" at such a young age?
"No, I didn't I..."
"No better argument than that? I must say for a wise man you are very much an...now what's the word, oh yes, an idiot" and the laughter came again, this time hitting Rev like small waves of electric enrgy, causing more pain, and adding to his already battered body."
"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, I wish I could turn back time, be a better pearson." His voice was now pleading, but a cold reply camed, "you still don't understand do you?"
"This is so little about you being a better pearson, you need to see that"
As he spoke Rev felt he was back to being a young magog, a blood thursty magog, one who wanted nothing more than destroying the happines that he felt around him a happines he couldn't reach, that is until he felt love for the first time, love and peace, that felt so long ago, he remebered the young wayst priest that helped him when he was atacked by some nietzcheans that were into playing mood.
That was when he decided it was time for him to repay some of the sins and some of the pain he caused, the pain he had caused to the others, he was doing it for them, and only secondly for himself, that was what the voice was trying to tell him, this was about those he hurt, he needed to be more human to bring them peace too, it wasn't about him not living, it was about him living for them, in honour of their names and lives, it was for them that he wanted to be more human.
He had lost sight of that when he took his retreat, he knew something was missing, he just didn't know what, now he knew, and he felt a suddent peace taking over him.
"Thank you" Rev said to the darkness, I finally understand.
"Good cause I was starting to get bored" This time the voice wasn't threathening at all, just peace seemed to be radiating even in the pitch black around him.
"Who are you?"
"Me? I am just me, kinda like you should be...think about it, your life wasn't pointless, it never was, no life is ever pointless, try in remembering that"
"I feel so free, so...different, and yet it's still the same like before, I am different?" Rew questioned the darkness.
A giggle was heard: "Yes you are, but don't tell anyone I told you that, and if you wanna thank someone you should thank them" Again Rev felt like he had to look towards where the people that moments before were ripping him appart. Only now he saw only smiles and encouraging looks from them. They kept trying to tell him something, but nothing came out from their lips.
A suddent rush of light sent Rev to the ground, "strange he tought, I didn't realise I was standing" He pushed himself of the floor and for the first time he noticed his hands, yeah, that's right, hands, not claws, and skin , not furr, what was this, he started to stare at what he looked like, it finally hit him, they weren't killing him, they were turning him into a human, he was no longer a magog...
He wanted to scream, but all he could do was cry, he cried for hours, he was finally ready, ready to begin a life ment to honour those that he had destroyed, and also to help those that he could.
Then he remembered something more, in his dream, Harper, Beka, Dylan, Trance, they were all there, smiling and he made sense of the words the people around him were saying: "Welcome home Rev!"
Moments earlier, or maybe hours, who knows, people are so obsessed with time...
"Okay, so remind me why are we doing this again?" Lys asked with an annoyed look upon his face. I 'm getting bored, I tought you said this would be fun...
"It will be, just we didn't get to the fun part yet, be patient!" Elo answered in frustration,
"Yeah, you said that an hour ago...Lys muttered under his breath, I'm tired, can't we do this some other time?"
"Leave if you want I wanna finishe what we started, they really need help, I never tought he would leave, but then again I always knew he would..."
"Sure thing, you never tought, you always knew, call me when you make sense."
Elo stared at his young apprentice with a less then kind look upon his face.
"You really are new at this! exasperation was getting the better of him, look this is how it works, we know stuff, like I know right now that at some point they will all feel lost and in need of our assistance, but I don't think that that will happen, call it a hope if you wish it to be so, it's strange but the longer you'll work for us the easier it will be for you to feel more and try to understand less."
Lys returned the same blank look he always had when explanations were lost on himj, but chose to remain silent, this really wasn't a good time to piss of Elo, and well Elo was the Boss, okay so not the big Boss, but a boss none the less. Snap out of it Lys, he began screaming inside his own mind, focus...
"OKay we're here, Elo finally stated. This is Rev Bem, he is...troubled, by his well let's say unsuccesful attempts at humanity."
"I'm not surprised, with that nasty fur, what is he? I don't remember this type of...creature"..
Elo took in a deep breath, this is gonna be harder than he tought..
"He's a magog! They feed upon others and well they like it a little to much. They also reproduce by infesting unwiling hosts with their eggs that after that eat their hosts inside out"..
"And he's shocked he stands no chances in achieving humanity, pfui, he must be really thick if he doesn't get that through his furry skull, Lys took an instant disliking of the furry creature in front of him."
Elo felt it was time his young friend found out a bit of the good Rev did, pictures of his relentless efforts in helping the Andromeda crew, his pain as a magog, his longing for the mother he murdered, and the words that brought them here: "I wish I was never born"
"OKay, point taken, not such a bad guy, well maybe those nasty sounds he makes when he says " I'm Red Plague" Lys tried to be fierced but failed. Okay time to get to work, may I ?"
"Be my guest, it's your time to learn." Elo smiled, now he'll see what his new partner in the near future will be like...