Everything Burns

Chapter: 13

Pairing: Robert & Emma

Rating: PG

"What about your relationship with Cesar during your pregnancy?" Robert asked.

"I was his loving, devoted wife." Holly replied. "I didn't want his child but I still didn't want any harm to come to the baby. I thought the best way to ensure the safety of Benjamin and Alexander was to play along with Cesar. I thought that if I did everything he asked then maybe he wouldn't hurt us and it worked."

"When did you change your mind about Alexander?" Robert asked. "Before he was born?"

"No." she answered. "After he was born and I saw his little face I realized how wrong I had been to resent him. He was an innocent baby and what Cesar had done wasn't his fault and he didn't deserve to be hated simply because of who his Father was. Cesar was overjoyed that he had a son, so overjoyed that he let me name him. Alexander Charles." she told him. "Benjamin's middle name is Robert by the way."

"Did you add it after you woke up?" he asked.

Holly shook her head. "Barry put it in there."

"I knew I liked him." Robert smiled. "Are you alright to continue?"

"Yes." she answered. "Over the next few years everything went smoothly with Cesar and the boys until about summer of 1991."

"What happened?" he asked.

"I'm not sure I should tell you." she replied. "I'm not so sure you're going to want to hear it."

"Whatever it is I want to hear it." Robert assured her. "Please."

Holly took a deep breath and slowly exhaled. "In August I found out that Cesar had been spending his time with Anna." she paused and tried to gain a reaction from Robert before she continued. He looked intrigued and she continued. "He was planning to run off with her, actually they were planning to run off together."

Robert just looked at her. Everything was silent for several long minutes. "I know." he replied. "When I went after her I found them together."

"I'm sorry." she said softly.

"It's alright. Anna and her betrayals are for a whole other conversation." he said. "Please continue, I want to hear more about Alexander and Benjamin."

"When Cesar found out that I knew what was going on he banished me." she told him. "He forced me to leave without my sons. He said that if I told anyone about Anna that I would never see my children again. That's why I didn't tell you about Benjamin when I returned. I couldn't risk it and I knew that eventually I could get them back."

"What happened after the boat explosion?" Robert asked.

"I left New York and headed back to Provence to get my sons." she told him. "I believed you were dead and I regretted not telling you about Benjamin, but it was too late the damage was done so I did they only thing I could do I took my boys and got the hell out of France."

"You went back to England?"

"Yes." Holly answered. "I went back to my family."

"And joined the WSB?"

"Yes in the summer of 1992." she smiled. "Being in the WSB changed everything but most importantly it helped secure Benjamin and Alexander's safety. Cesar had tons of enemies and I was afraid they would come after my children. Thankfully no one ever has. We've been living in England safely and happily for the past fourteen years."

"What do Benjamin and Alexander know about your past?" Robert asked. "What did you tell them about their Fathers?"

"Cesar raised Benjamin as his son." she told him. "Every time he called Cesar Daddy I wanted to scream but I refrained because he never harmed Benjamin and for that I was eternally grateful. Alexander was too young to remember Cesar and Benjamin's memories of him quickly faded. When they were older and started asking questions I simply told them that their Father had died when they were younger and at the time it wasn't a lie. I believed both you and Cesar to be dead."

"I'm assuming that they've found out differently?"

"When Benjamin graduated from school he became increasingly interested in joining the WSB. Through his searches he discovered Robert Scorpio and became more intrigued than ever. When he learnt of the boat explosion and that it involved Cesar some of his earlier memories about our time in Provence came back to him and he realized right away that Cesar was his and Alexander's Father." Holly explained. "He confronted me with what he knew and demanded to know the truth. I had to tell him the truth I kept it from him for far too long. For Benjamin learning that his Father was the man he idolized thrilled him, but Cesar was a different story. He lashed out at me because of my involvement with Cesar. He wanted to know how I could have betrayed his Father for the enemy. I couldn't bear to tell him the truth about my relationship with Cesar I didn't think that he should know the truth and I still don't. I told him that Cesar was a different man when I first met him, that he was kind and loving and caring and a good husband and Father."

"You did what you had to do, Holly." he replied. "You kept both your sons safe and there's no reason for you to feel guilty. They're alive today because of everything you've done to protect them. They may not understand why you did the things you did but they will in time. You had no choice but to lie about Cesar, no child should ever have to hear how evil and sadistic their Father is it will make them doubt everything they believe themselves to be."

"I don't ever want Alexander to find out that he's a child of rape and I've done everything in power to prevent him from ever finding out." Holly told him. "If pretending that I had a loving relationship with Cesar is the price I have to pay in order for Alexander or Benjamin to find out then so be it."

"You'd be willing to sacrifice everything for your sons, Holly and I think that makes you not only an incredible Mother but an incredible woman as well." Robert told her softly. "After everything you've overcome with Cesar I can still see the spirit of the young woman I married. I think Benjamin and Alexander have been very lucky to have you as their Mother and hopefully they'll except me as their Father."

tbc...

Sneak Peek: Benjamin slams the door in Holly's face.