Freaky-Randomness
By: Black Rain Girl
Yup…one reviewer last time (Thanks, Lady Sonora!) and right now I've gone to Albino Black Sheep .com and I'm listening to the flash video "Numa Numa"! I LOVE THIS SONG! Okay, um, yesterday and today my town celebrated Hyllingsfest. Right now, it's almost 7:00 am. I have to be at the middle school at 9:00 am. Yes, the middle school, not the high school. The band room is in the middle school. Anyhoo, today, I get to March in the Hyllingsfest parade, along with 6th, 7th, 8th, and the 9th graders. We're playing as a band, with Mr. Knopp and Mr. Steinberg leading us! THEY'RE SO GREAT! I PLAY A DRUM!
Skyra: Rainy likes making big sounds.
Rainy: I LIKE BIG BOOMS RIGHT BEHIND MY HEAD! (Eye twitch) BIG BOOMS FROM BASE DRUM! ALONG WITH BIG CRASHES! BIG CRASHES FROM CYMBALS!
Janzu: She plays snare drum, by the way. And she's pretty good at keeping a beat.
Rainy: LEFT! LEFT! LEFT, RIGHT, LEFT! EVERYONE SAY 'HOOHA!'
Everyone: (uncertainly) Hooha?
Rainy: HOOHA TWO TIMES TUESDAY! WOOOT!
Random thing of the week:
Sora: (cross-eyed) I LIKE BEANS!
Riku: (gasp) So do I! Look! (Holds out hand full of marbles) MORE MARBLES!
Sora: Wait, now I have to go Matrix slow motion! (Starts going matrix slow motion dodging bullets)
Leon: Good work, you dodged the bullets, Sora; Now you will now die by chainsaw!
Sora: AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH! (Being chased by a chain saw)
Rainy: Tree tops and tree houses our society has ended! DIE HEARTLESS DIE!
Nik (Skyra and Janzu's baby boy): Goo goo.
Janzu: LOVE AND PEACE!
Skyra: God help me…
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Spin The Bottle truth Or Dare
By: MEEEEE! (Ugh, you know who I am!)
(A/N: How many knew that I was going to do 'Spin the Bottle Truth or Dare'? if you knew…cookie for you…if you didn't know…Bigger Cookie to make you feel better!)
(Now I'm listening to 'She Blocked Me'!)
Everyone was still there from Telephone.
Skyra was admiring the Last chappie. "Oh…I remember that!" she punched Janzu playfully. "You were such a dumb-butt!" Janzu blushed. Skyra turned to Rainy. "You were a much more sane back then. What in the world drove you nuts?"
Rainy clutched her knees, rocking back and forth. "Tangerines. Tangerines. Tangerines." Looks over at a big bowl of tangerines. "TANGERINES!" (Alleluia chorus) smiling crazily, Rainy lunged to the bowl and picked up a tangerine. Then her eyes widened slightly. Then she whimpered while rotating the fruit hurriedly in her hands. Soon, she stopped rotating her tangerine; her eyes welled up with tears, and her lower lip was quivering. Then, she went out into a full out bawl.
Skyra and Janzu rolled their eyes. Janzu picked the tangerine up, took out a knife, and cut away a bit of the peel. He handed it back to Rainy.
Rainy opened her eyes up, and looked at her tangerine, and the peel that had been turned up, revealing the delicious, orange goodness on the inside. She stopped crying instantly and was very happy! She unpeeled it all the way, and took a happy bite out of it.
Skyra and Janzu rolled their eyes again.
((((((Me: (picks up tangerine. Eyes widen. Rotates tangerine while whimpering. Stops rotating. Starts bawling) WAAAAAAHH!
Skyra Janzu: (sigh)
Janzu: (cuts open a part of the peel. Hands it back to me)
Me: (looks at tangerine. Smiles.) YAY!)))))))
"Okay…" Sora said slowly. "Uh…are we going to play?"
Rainy gently put a baby bonnet on her tangerine, put it in a little crib, and began to sing.
"Hush, little tangy, don't say a word. Rainy's going to buy you a mocking bird. And since that seems really dumb, I will shoot it with a gun."
Everyone backed away.
Rainy put a mini-mobile on the mini-crib, and changed her song to a slower version of 'Simple and Clean'. If you people have the KH soundtrack like I got last Christmas, you would go to disk 2, and select num. 30.
Sora said, "Rainy, you're going over-the-top again."
Rainy looked up at him and replied:
"I reject your reality, and replace it with my own!" and she continued to tend to her precious tangerine.
"Okay, playing shall commence in 5…4…3…2…1!" Yuffie screamed.
"GAME-AGE!" everyone yelled.
Sora grabbed a bottle from behind his heart-shaped butt (don't ask) and spun it inside the circle.
The bottle spun round and round and round and eventually stopped at Leon. I almost typed Squall there!
"Now, truth or dare?" Sora asked with an evil grin.
"Truth." Squall replied shakily.
"What color is your underwear!" Riku demanded, pointing an accusing finger.
"Hey! I'm suppose to ask him, not you ya moron!" Sora exclaimed.
"Just get on with it." Cloud said flatly.
"Okay, so Leon…" Sora had his back turned to the unfortunate wretch (Leon). He spun around swiftly. "WHAT COLOR IS YOUR UNDERWEAR!"
"Red. Cuz I love the color of blood!" Leon said truthfully.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" Dumaz the retarded ostrich screamed before running out the door.
"Wait!" Rainy screamed. "Dumaz! Come back!" She ran to the door and looked out. She turned around. "Retarded ostrich!" she sat back down.
Everyone backed away from her slowly.
"Uh," Leon said, "My turn." He spun the bottle. It landed on Donald. "Dare or Dare?"
"I pick Dare!" Donald quacked. "No, wait! I mean Truth!"
"MWA HA HA!" Leon laughed. "I said 'Dare or Dare'! You can't pick truth! MWA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"
Donald cried.
"I dare you to…" Leon looked around to room. He signaled for Yuffie, Cloud, Sora, Riku, Rainy, and Skyra to come over and help him. They huddled in a circle.
"Can they do that?" Goofy asked.
"Yes, they can." Janzu replied.
"Okay," Leon interrupted. "Donald, I dare you to pull all your feathers out, paint red and white polka dots on yourself, and sing the Barbie song."
"FINALLY!" Donald screamed in relief. Everyone backed away. He began to pull out his feathers at hyper speed. When he was done, painted himself with red and white polka dots. Then, he sang the Barbie song. "I'm a Barbie girl! In the Barbie world! Something plastic! It's fantastic! You can brush my hair! And dress me anywhere! Imagination! That is your creation! Come on, Barbie, let's go party—!"
"No Stop!" Yuffie shrieked, covering her eyes.
"IT BURNS!" Cloud screamed, writhing on the ground.
"TANGY! COVER YOUR EYES!" Rainy screamed, hand over her eyes, and the other hand over where the tangerine's eyes would be…if it had eyes…
"I DIDN'T MEAN IT TO BE THAT LITERAL!" Leon yelled at the…very disturbing duck.
Donald spun around, and posed. Then, like a REALLY big boom, there was a loud, "HIT ME BABY ONE MORE TIME!"
"Are you done?" Sora asked.
"Yes," Donald nodded solemnly.
"Donald is disqualified for being disturbing." Janzu read from an official looking truth or dare rule book.
"You can't disqualify me!" Donald scracked.
"It's here in the book, that when playing spin the bottle truth or dare during the daytime with the lights on and while playing with a duck, that if the duck starts singing Brittany Spears songs, the duck is disqualified and who ever was responsible for the duck to get that crazy in the first place is knocked upside the head." Janzu read from the rulebook.
Donald was then dragged out by two VERY buff, bald bouncers.
"Very well then, shall we continue?" Riku asked.
"Not until Leon is smacked upside the head." Rainy said before they hit Leon repeatedly for bringing about the horrible sight of a naked Donald painted with polka dots singing Brittany Spears songs.
"It was Skyra, Rainy, Cloud—heh, rainy-cloud—Yuffie, Sora, and Riku's idea…" Leon grumbled rubbing his sore, little, stupid, head.
"Okay," Janzu said. "Since it's supposed to be Donald's turn, but he's disqualified, I'll spin the bottle." Janzu spun the bottle, and it landed on Rainy. "Ok, Truth or Dare?"
"DARE ME, BABY!" Rainy screamed.
"Okay," Janzu said. "I dare you to end Freaky-Randomness after this chapter, and to start the sequel soon." Everyone gasped. "AND to go out into the small angry mob of readers who don't want you to stop Freaky-Randomness." Everyone gasped again, but this time, Aerith fainted.
Rainy's eye twitched. "I hate you." She said with all the venom of hell. Janzu edged back a little.
Rainy cleared her throat. "Attention readers. I will be ending Freaky-Randomness after this chapter is done…WHEN PIGS FLY!" Rainy turned to Janzu and pointed accusingly at him. "YOU ARE NOT THE JANZU WE HAVE COME TO KNOW, LOVE, AND ANNOY!" Everyone gasped. "YOU ARE THE EVIL SMELLY SHOE THAT MOLDS IN MY CLOSET!"
Janzu suddenly (I should say Randomly) morphed into a giant smelly shoe! Skyra fainted.
"Curse you…" the shoe whispered. It disappeared with a 'poof'.
"Now," Rainy said, turning around. "Where's Janzu?"
Suddenly, Janzu walked into the room with Spangles food. "Anyone want Spangles for dinner?" he asked.
"Ooooooooooh!" Rainy squealed, jumping up and down. "I do! Did you get me a cherry-slushy!" Janzu nodded, and passed out the food to everyone. As everyone ate, Rainy spun the bottle. It landed on Sora.
"Kay, truthy-truth or darey-dare?" Rainy asked.
"Uh…Dare…?" Sora said uncertainly.
"Okay," Rainy explained. "I Dare you to hug—or kiss, whatever they want—all the other Sora fan-girls that want one!" She smiled happily. Randomly, bunches of Sora fan-girls ran into the room looking hyper. Rainy was one of them. She held her arms out. "Huggy!" She cried, and she hugged Sora. One-by-one, each fangirl got a hug (One was pushy and totally Frenched Sora, but she was fairly punished…and thrown out of the Sora-club) and ran out the room squealing their heads off.
"Ya know," Cloud said. "Rainy needs someone…a someone-someone…ya know…a boyfriend or sumthin'." He scratched his chin. "Hey! You should meet my friend, Kaze! He's pretty cool, and he's single." Then, he got out his cell phone that had a chocobo on the back (CHOCOBOOOOOO! I LUV CHOCOBOS!) and called his friend Kaze. Kaze appeared.
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What's going on in Rainy's head:
"ALLELUIA! ALLELUIA! ALLEEEEEEEELUUUUUUIAAAAAAA!"
He's perfect…What Kaze looks like:
Black hair, slightly tan skin, tall, handsome…Oh…his eyes…I'm as lost in his eyes as much as Cid is lost in his pants…Why Cid is lost in his pants is a family joke…There's a Moogle in there… (O.O) Mooooooooooogllllleee…Oh, and the reason he shoves his thumb up his nose, is because me sis is lost in there, and he doesn't want her to get out….another family joke….you guys are probably all like, "Wtf…O.o", but me no care!
KAZE IS A HOTTIE AND NONE OF YOU FORGET IT! HE'S MINE! MEINE (pronounced: Minay. It's in GERMAN!)!
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"Uh, hi Cloud." Kaze said. "Who're these guys?"
"Well, you know Leon, Yuffie, Donald, Aerith, Goofy, Sora, and Riku…" Cloud said. "But this is Rainy, Skyra, Janzu, and Skyra and Janzu's baby, Nik. I called you to come and hook up with Rainy…or something…"
Kaze gave Cloud a glare. "Oh-ho, NO! Not again! I'm not going to become a pawn in your plan, AGAIN!"
"Yes you are…" Cloud blinked. Then he did the puppy-dog face with made all the girls go, "AWWWWW!"
"GRAWR!" Kaze growled. "Fine! Jeez! Which one of you is Rainy!" Rainy put her face close to his, her eyes wide, and she was breathing noisily…ya know, the way some asthmatic person breathes when they're having an asthma attack…or the way some really hyper person breathes when they see a Lollipop…either one… Anyhoo, Kaze took a step away. "Uh, Hi Rainy…" Rainy continued to breathe hyperly. Totally O.O, Kaze sat down. Rainy sat in his lap, and squealed.
"I'm sitting on a boy's lap!" She squealed. "And it's not my Grandpa's or me Daddy's!" She continued to squeal for about five minutes before finally stopping.
Skyra spun the bottle, since Rainy was being to hyper to even remember that 2 plus 3 is NOT kumquat divided by Shoes.
The bottle landed on Rainy…again…I HAVE A MAGNET IN ME BELLY!
"Truth or dare." Skyra asked.
"Truth!" Rainy Shrieked.
"Okay," Skyra began. "What's your real age?"
Shifty-eyed, Rainy answered, "Whatcha talking bout?"
"I know you're not sixteen!" Skyra laughed evilly.
Everyone stared at Rainy. "You're not Sixteen!" Sora asked.
Rainy began to blush. "Uh, heh heh…let's not go there…my few readers will be all 'OMG!' If I said me real age!"
"YOU HAVE TO!" Skyra screamed. "YOU PICKED TRUTH! TELL US YOUR REAL AGE!"
"FINE!" Rainy griped. "Jeez! Why did I create you!" She cleared her throat. "I'm not sixteen. In fact," Rainy suddenly shrank…especially her chest… "I'M ELEVEN! Double hockey-sticks, baby!" Everyone stared at her. Even the Readers. "No, really," Rainy said. "I'm actually 11 years old. I'm not lying. I swear I'm not…I'll be twelve in December! But, for now, I'm a stupid little Sixth grader with a dream…whoa…that was dramatic…" Rainy blinked at her own dramatic dialogue.
"Wait," Kaze said slowly. "If you're only eleven…and I'm eighteen…" his eyes widened, and she pushed Rainy off his lap. "UNDERAGED!" and he ran out of the room.
"You're actually eleven?" Riku asked.
"I'll be twelve, soon!" she said hopefully. (A/N: Really…I'm actually eleven…it's not there for comic purposes)
"Can we continue?" Cloud asked. Everyone nodded, deciding to forget about Rainy's age.
Rainy spun the bottle, and it landed on Donald. "MWA HA HA!" She screamed. "Truth…or DARE!"
"Truth?" Donald edged away from her.
Rainy spun around really fast and was in Sherlock Holmes detective clothes. It was really awkward since she was just spinning while putting on a coat and a hat, and a little smoke pipe, which blew bubbles along with a magnifying glass.
She pointed an accusing finger at Donald. "WHERE WERE YOU ON MY BIRTHDAY! Let me rephrase…WHERE WERE YOU ON MY LAST 2 BIRTHDAYS! AND, HOW DID YOU GET BACK IN HERE YOU WERE DIQUALIFIED YOU DISTURBING DUCK!"
Donald replied. "Well, for your tenth birthday, you weren't writing fanfics yet, and you were playing Wild Arms 3, not Kingdom Hearts. And for your 11th birthday you were writing fanfics, but the only one on KH didn't have me in it…and worse…You deleted it…so for your last two birthdays, I was stuck in the game…either that or I was getting ready for Christmas. And how I got in is for me to know, and for you to not!"
"Why would you be getting ready for Christmas!" She shrieked. "And...dude, I'm the author...I have to know how you got in."
"You're birthday is December 22nd…isn't it…that's just 3 days before Christmas." Donald reasoned. "And you still don't need to know howI got in here."
"Oh…" Rainy sat down and licked a lollipop. "Still...I WANT to know..."
Donald spun the bottle. It spun and spun and spun and spun and spun and spun and spun and spun and spun and spun and spun and spun and spun and spun and spun and spun and spun and spun and spun and spun and spun and spun and spun and spun and spun and spun and spun and spun and spun and spun and spun and spun and spun and spun and spun and spun and spun and spun and spun and spun and spun and spun and spun and spun and spun—
Leon stopped the bottle with his hand, and it landed on Goofy…poor, neglected, Goofy…
Donald rubbed his hands together evilly. "Truth or dare, Goofy."
"Ah-hayuck! Truth!" Goofy said goofily…O.O
"What's your middle name!" Donald demanded.
"Butt." Goofy replied. "Ah-hayuck!"
Everyone asked in unison, "Butt?" Then Sora began to laugh.
"Goofy Butt Goof!" he managed to choke. "My mom called me that ALL the time!"
Soon everyone else laughed.
Goofy spun the bottle…and it landed on Aerith.
"Truth or dare." Goofy asked.
"Um…Truth…" Aerith replied.
"You're all wimps." Riku muttered.
"Do you like Cloud or Sephiroth? You can only pick one." Goofy replied.
"Ummm…" Aerith got out a picture of Seph…and then looked at Cloud…then Seph…then Cloud…it went on like that for about ten minutes before Cloud screamed, "AERITH!"
Aerith burst into tears. "I can't choose!" she sobbed harder. "Seph is HOT! And Cloud is Cute…so…so…I have to choose…KAZE!"
"WHAT!" Cloud screamed.
Seph burst through the wall, and screamed, "WHAT!"
Then, Kaze burst through the wall, ran over Seph and Cloud, picked Aerith up, and they rode off into the sunset…painting…
"ARGH!" they yelled as they hit the wall.
"How come we didn't crash through the wall like all the other times?" Aerith asked.
"I dunno…" Kaze replied. Then, seeing the angry looks among Seph and Cloud's faces, made him panic. "Uh…Let's use the door…" then they rode out the door quickly.
"Okay…" Sora said. "We just lost Aerith…"
"What do we do now?" Riku asked. "And, wait a minute…Rainy, if you're in this fanfic…then whose typing?"
Shifty-eyed, Rainy replied. "What do you mean?" she quickly looked behind her, and then motioned for Riku to come over to her. He did, and she began to whisper hurriedly in his ear.
A look of understanding dawned on his face. "Ohhhhh…" he crawled back to his spot.
"Well…" Sora said. "This is boring…SOMEONE DARE ME!"
"DARE!" Rainy screamed randomly for no reason, then she and Sora began to run around screaming random words. Then, they put on a little skit where Rainy was a bunny, and Sora was the evil smelly shoe. Then they sat down. Rainy put a sticker on her nose that said, "EXCELLENT".
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Oy…I'm running out of ideas…um…this is the end of the chappie…sorry my few readers! You all get cookies for waiting so long! Oh! And little medals because you guys actually read this! They're made of chocolate…so you can eat them…the chocolate will come back every five seconds, of course…
Oooh! Good news!
Recently, in Language Arts class, we all got to write stories using three words which were drawn out of a hat, and three conventions, so…I wrote FREAKY-RANDOMNESS THE SEQUEL! Not sure whether or not to stop this fanfic and go ahead with Freaky-Randomness the Sequel…or to just put it up as the next chappie…
I think I'll put it up as the next Chappie so you guys don't have to look for it! Hopefully, Freaky-Randomness NEVER ends!
Random Word of the Week: Ploo. Go to the person you love to annoy, touch them on the head and squeal Ploo! People will think you're Random, and funny! Especially if that person is my friend (more like 'Victim") Michael Montgomery! I call him Ploo.
PLOO!