Finally, exams are over. Do enjoy my chapter. It took me a long time to write it.

The pain of loving you

Don't go

Do not weep, maiden, for war is kind.

Because your lover threw wild hands toward the sky

And the affrighted steed ran on alone,

Do not weep.

War is kind.

Hoarse, booming drums of the regiment,

Little souls who thirst for fight,

These men were born to drill and die.

The unexplained glory flies above them,

Great is the battle-god, great, and his kingdom –

A field where a thousand corpses lie.

Do not weep, babe, for war is kind.

Because your father tumbled in the yellow trenches,

Raged at his breast, gulped and died,

Do not weep.

War is kind.

Swift blazing flag of the regiment,

Eagle with crest red and gold,

These men were born to drill and die.

Point for them the virtue of slaughter,

Make plain to them the excellence of killing

And a field where a thousand corpses lie.

Mother whose heart hung humble as a button

On the bright splendid shroud of your son,

Do not weep.

War is kind.

--Stephen Crane, 1899--

Silence consumed the palace, and the only sound that could be heard were the hurried steps of Millerna. Dead could be seen, smelled,

felt. It hanged in the air, making everyone want to hide in the deepest place they could find. She didn't know what she feared most, the

silence that came after a battle or the noise that was heard through it. She only knew that every time a battle ended the names of the

unlucky ones were brought to their families, and the only feeling that could be felt was pain. Every time a battle ended, people suffered

and died in the inside a little bit more. People died every day, and the families of the deceased no longer suffered for one dead but for

many more. The war was tearing everything apart, leaving the survivors to mourn and yearn for what they had lost. What had started as a

simple conflict had become the greatest and most horrible war that Gaea had seen. People no longer thought about tomorrow. They just

prayed they would be able to life one more day.

Millerna ran desperately through the halls of the palace. She knew something was wrong. The way Dryden had said goodbye this

morning was just not right. It was as if he knew they wouldn't have tomorrow.

Flashback

Millerna awoke with the sound of the birds. She curled against his husband, breathing in his scent. She knew she was the luckiest person

in the world. He loved her, and that was all she needed. She poked him, and he turned around. She poked him again, but he just put his

head under the pillow. She thought of another tactic to wake him up. She raised herself up and freed herself from his grasp. Without hurry

she started to kiss his toes, going up and up and up. She smiled as she heard him respond. He pulled her into his arms and hugged her.

He started to kiss her, but the sound of a bomb broke them apart. Millerna looked at Dryden. His playful mode was gone. He was now

serious. His face had gone rigid.

"Dryden…" he silenced her by putting a finger on her lips.

"Millerna, lets just stay quiet for a minute" she did as he told him. She rested her head on his shoulder and waited for him to make any

move or sound. He didn't.

"I want you to promise me something" she raised her head and looked into his eyes. They were clouded by worry.

"Anything"

"Promise me that, no matter what happens to me, you will go on. Promise me you'll keep hoping and loving and laughing. Promise me

you will be strong forever"

She looked deeply into his eyes. She was getting scared by his actions and words.

"What's wrong?"

"Just promise me" he looked so tired she didn't have the heart to tell him no.

"I promise"

He smiled a little and hugged her.

"I love you"

"I love you too"

He brushed his lips against hers, and she pulled him into a passionate kiss. He intensified it and kissed her like there was no tomorrow,

like it was their last kiss. He broke apart abruptly and went to get dressed. Before leaving, he turned and gave her a radiant smile, but

Millerna saw that it didn't reach his eyes. He didn't give her time to say anything else, and he disappeared from her sight.

End Flashback

That had been the last time she had seen him. She had gotten a bad feeling since morning, and now that she couldn't find him, she feared

the worse. She looked around her and saw all the people that Allen was taking care of. They looked so torn and hopeless that she

couldn't help but to feel a little more desperate. They had been at war for four months and devastation could already be seen

everywhere. A noise caught her attention and she turned towards it. A woman was crying. In her arms lied a boy that couldn't be more

than 16. He was dead. A knot formed in her stomach. She didn't want to mourn for someone. She had never had any reasons to cry in

all her life. She didn't want to start now that everyone needed her to be cheerful. She kept on with her search for Dryden. He had to be

somewhere. He couldn't just disappear from the face of Gaea.

'Please let him be okay' she prayed to all her gods for his safety. She somehow knew that something terrible was about to happen. A

trumped sounded in the distance, and movement was heard. Asturia and Zaibach were starting the battle of the day. A fear of losing this

time passed her. She shook it away. She had to believe in all the people that were fighting for them.

'Maybe Dryden is there' the thought left her more scared than before. What if he didn't come back this time? What if she never saw him

again? What if he died? No, he wouldn't, couldn't die. He had to come back to her. He just wouldn't leave her alone in this situation.

She had to trust him. The sound of the battle intensified more, and she tried to block them out.

'He is with Allen. He won't let anything happen to him. He knows I will die without him' She bit her lip hard. No matter what she did, the

feeling of chaos just wouldn't leave her.

Hitomi knew she shouldn't fear Van. It had been Ulaidh´s tricks the ones that had made Van want to kill. It wasn't his fault, and still, she

couldn't help but feel afraid of him. As much as she tried to, she couldn't erase the image of Van's eyes when he was under the spell.

Nothing had mattered to him but the killing. His lust for destroying had been so great that he had even forgotten who he was. It reminded

Hitomi of who he really was; a mercenary. She had been so sure that there was more to him than what he showed to the world, so sure

that he was a good person who had just suffered a lot. Now, she wasn't sure of anything anymore. She avoided and ignored him as much

as she could. She wanted to get away from him because it hurt to know that he had almost killed her. She knew her life had been close to

ending. Sonly a miracle had save her from sure dead. She wondered what had stopped him from finishing her off. Probably Ulaidh

decided to spare her life. Hitomi sighed and looked at the stars above her. She used to hate night because it took the sun and light away

from her. Everything had changed since she had met him. He was dark and a mystery, just like the night, and she had found herself

wishing for it. Night brought her closer to him. It made him look beautiful. The air blew and she shivered from the cold. She got closer to

the fire and closed her eyes. Why did she think of him in that way? Why did he always creep into her thought? Why did they have to go

to Glendalough? If they had never gone there, she would still be able to consider Van a friend. If they had never gone there, she wouldn't

have to think of what to do now, that she couldn't even look at him. She was sure that she would never be able to see him with the same

eyes. He had showed her his darkest side, and she had trembled. Trust was something they would never be able to have. Even though

she no longer hated him, she would never be able to trust someone that enjoyed killing. Nothing would ever be the same between them.

She let out a long sighed. She turned to look at the two lakes that were in front of her. It was a strange place, the one they were camping

at. Two lakes of the same form stood in front of her, separated by a path formed by the men. They used to be one big lake, but the

necessity of communication between the two towns that lay at both ends of the lake had forced humans to split it and make two lakes. It

was a weird sight, but she liked it. She thought it gave the place a magical touch. The moon illuminated both lakes, making them look

silver. She wondered how she could have ever disliked the moon and the night. They were bright and provided light just like the sun.

They just did it in a different way. Besides, it was at night when one could be with themselves without any interruptions. Night allowed

anyone to think things over. She didn't know if she liked that right now. She had to sort out so many thoughts in her head that she got a

headache from just thinking of it. Her hand traveled to her neck. It was still sore, but it wasn't that what she remembered. After Van had

put her down, he had gently touched her neck and kissed her bruises. Electricity had passed through her body the moment his lips had

touched her skin, and she hadn't wanted him to stop. Hitomi shook her head.

'I need to cool down and relax' she looked at the lakes. It had been a long time since she had a proper bath, and right now seemed like

the perfect time. She got up and walked towards it. She wondered how deep the lakes would be. It was probably very deep. Not that it

mattered because she wasn't going to get away from the shore. She took her shoes out and touched the water with her toe. Surprisingly,

it wasn't cold. It was actually kind of warm. She was going to take her shirt off when something graved her ankle. Without giving her any

chance to do anything, it pulled her into the water.

Van knew he had ruined everything. Hitomi would never trust him again. She wouldn't even look at him. She avoided him like he was the

devil.

'Maybe I am'

All his life he had wanted nothing but to get away from everyone. It was ironic that now that he wanted to be close to someone, she

wanted to be far away from him. Even though they had ha a rocky beginning, they had somehow been able to form a sort of friendship.

With everything that had happened and Glendalough, their fragile friendship had simply been destroyed. Damn Ulaidh and her stupid

tricks. Hitomi had started to trust him, and now she would never even think of it. He walked towards the camp, deciding he had given

enough time to Hitomi to be alone. He wished he knew what he had done to her. He was sure it had been something horrible. He

remembered the red marks she had on her neck. When he had seen them, he had reached towards them, but she shad backed away

from him. He hadn't tried to touch her since then. He didn't want to scare her anymore. Besides, she needed time to clear her mind. He

arrived at the camp, and the first thing he noticed was that she wasn't there.

'She probably went for a walk' as soon as he thought that, he knew it wasn't true. She hadn't gone for walks since Dilandu had attacked

her. She feared Van, but she was terrified of Dilandu. He searched for any clue that night give him a clue to where she was. There was

none. She wasn't there. His head turned towards the lakes. Could she be there? He quickly made his way towards them.

'It's dangerous to be close to any lake at night. Doesn't she know anything?' he spot her shoes, but there were no signs of her anywhere.

He was getting very worried. Where could she be? He looked at the lakes. There was no other answer. She had to be in there. He

cursed her for been so stupid. It wasn't safe to swim alone. He searched for her with his eyes, but wasn't able to find her. He felt a twist

of magic and narrowed his eyes. There was something in the water, and it didn't have a good aura around it. He got into the water and

followed the aura. As much as he swan, he just couldn't get close to it. He swam faster, dread of what could happen to Hitomi making

him move quickly. He went to get more air and ducked again. He went deeper, feeling more desperate as the minutes passed, and he still

wasn't able to find her. He caught a glimpse of a pink glow and went towards it. If he was right, it had to be Hitomi's necklace. When he

found her, all his blood went cold. She seemed to be like in a daze. He hair flung around her head, forming a kind of halo. Her eyes were

closed. She seemed to be sleeping. He reached towards her, but something got in his way. He turned his attention towards it and found a

big… something. It had Hitomi by the ankle.

'So that's why she couldn't come up. Well, stupid thing, you better free her or I'll kill you'

The thing went towards him, but this time he was ready. With one quick shift he cut his tentacle. He dove for his head, sword in hand.

The thing didn't have time to move, and it suddenly found itself with a sword through its head. It died without making any sound. Van

hurried towards Hitomi. He free her form the monster's grasp and quickly swam out of the lake. He had no other thought but her. As

soon as they reached the shore, he found out that she wasn't breathing. Desperation was clouding his judgment, so he tried to calm

himself, but he just couldn't.

"Please wake up, Hitomi" he whispered to her "you can't die now. We have so much to do. We can't disappoint a whole world, and I

want to make things right between us"

She wasn't responding. He didn't know what to do. He was a mercenary, not a healer.

"Hitomi, come on. You have to live."

He felt so hopeless. He was dying with her. He had sworn to protect her, and all he did was get her in trouble. If she died, it would all be

his fault. He let out a cry of sorrow. He couldn't let her die. He knew he wouldn't be able to stand it. He saw no point in living without

her. An idea suddenly occurred to him, and he bent down. Maybe if he gave her some of his oxygen he would come back to him. He

lowered his mouth towards her and gave her his life. For a moment, nothing happened, but them she started coughing. Van immediately

removed his lips from hers, but he didn't let go. Relief washed over him. She would be fine.

Hitomi felt her lungs burn. She coughed and spit some water. Breathing hurt her, and she wanted the pain to go away. She felt a hand on

her chest, and she suddenly realized that there was someone holding her and keeping her warm. She adjusted her vision and found Van

right in front of her. He had her in a tight embrace, and Hitomi blushed when she realized how close they were.

"Hitomi, you aren't breathing evenly" he told her. His voice was so melodic. She felt like going to sleep. She started to close her eyes.

"Hitomi, no stay awake. You can't go to sleep. You're still in danger" She opened her eyes for his sake. He turned her around and

placed her back against his chest. "Adjust your breathing to mine" Hitomi tried, but the pain was to much.

"I can't"

"Yes, you can. You can do anything. Please do it" He was begging her, and she couldn't help but give in. She would do anything for him.

The fear he caused her suddenly seemed forgotten. He had saved her life. He was always there when she needed him. He was the only

one that understood her. He was the one that was always there for her.

"You're doing just fine" without realizing how, she had managed to follow his rhythm. It still hurt to breath, but the pain was bearable

now. She turned her head to look at him, and brown met green. His eyes were so beautiful, and right now they seemed to be in such a

peace. He looked peaceful for the first time in his life.

"Van"

"Hitomi"

She was suddenly aware of how strong he was. She could feel his muscles against her body. His face was so close that she could feel his

breathing against her skin.

"I…" His hand caressed her cheek, and she couldn't continue her sentence. He made her feel so complete. He was so close, and his lips

so wonderfully perfect. They looked delicious, and she wanted to have a taste of them. She went closer to his face. They were so close,

just inches separated them, but something stopped her.

"Do you love Allen Schezar?"

The perfect moment broke into a thousand pieces. All her breath caught up on her throat. The responsibility she had was suddenly

remembered. She had to marry him for her people. The peace she had yearned for all her life depended on it. She lowered her eyes, and

committed one big mistake.

"Yes"

Finished! Well, now that my exams are over, I will be able to update as before. So, what do you think of this chapter? I don't

know if it was very good, but I sure know Hitomi and Van are going to have some problems. I'm sorry, but they won't kiss.

At least, not yet. Well, hope you like it. Wonder what Van's reaction will be. I was going to leave you without knowing if

Hitomi would be saved, but decided that, since you had to wait 2 weeks for an update, I couldn't be that cruel. Review and

tell me what you think.