Perfect
Disclaimer – No, I don't own Gilmore Girls, obviously I'm just obsessed; sad isn't it?
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Chapter Four – Broken
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Broken.
Rory Gilmore wasn't broken anymore.
There were so many reasons for this, but currently the most pressing was that through the kitchen door she could see her mother and Logan talking civilly, in what seemed to be a highly amicable fashion.
In fact, this made her smile more widely than she had since before the bridesmaids incident, even though she was still a little miffed about the fact that Logan hadn't come to the Inn to see her.
Oh, well.
She then let her thoughts drift to how ecstatic she was about finally letting him know that she was ready for their life, wow that was amazing! Their life, she and Logan had a life together.
It had never really hit her like it hit her at that moment – she had built this life for herself, she was no longer the Rory who was always in Lorelai's shadow, she was the Rory that had her own life and made her own choices. And she absolutely loved how she could share that with Logan.
Yep, he was definitely her other half, and without him she would be shattered. But that didn't matter now, because he was here, he was with her, and almost like magic she wasn't broken anymore.
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Broken.
Logan Huntzberger was broken.
Broken and… shocked.
For, despite all of his doubts of where Lorelai was at in terms of him, he had still honestly thought that there was no way she could possibly say no, especially not to something that would obviously make her daughter so happy.
At least he'd thought so – he'd really believed that together they had a shot at being happy forever, and that made her answer so much worse. He had been prepared, he had been excited, and now he was just broken.
He knew that without Rory in his life he wouldn't ever be whole again, but he also realized that Lorelai meant what she said. She honestly wouldn't give them her permission, permission which was vital in Rory's happiness.
So he would leave, he would never move on, but he would leave.
He would leave Rory with hope for a different future and with what would be only memories of an unbroken Logan. Because he knew another thing – without Rory, he would never be his formerly complete self again.
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Even though he made this decision in pain, he would follow through on it, if only for one reason, and one reason only. He wanted Rory to be happy, and Lorelai had made it crystal clear the she knew what was best for her daughter and that he wasn't it.
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Lorelai sheepishly re-entered the living room as Logan quietly snuck out the back door.
They had both agreed, or rather, Lorelai had decided that it would be best if Rory got a clean slate and was never aware of what could have been.
It wasn't that Lorelai didn't want her daughter to be satisfied in life, she just really didn't want her to be satisfied with Logan, because she knew exactly where that road would lead and she also knew that Rory could do so much better.
It was with this conviction that she spoke to Rory, "Kid, I'm so sorry, Logan wanted me to tell you that he just couldn't do this anymore. He wasn't ready for where your guys' relationship was headed."
The look on Rory's face almost made her want to take it all back – almost but not quite.
"What? But, but, mommy I loved him…" was the only argument a sobbing Rory could get out before her sadness turned into anger.
"How could he do this to me? Why would he even come after me two times, count them, not once, but twice, if he couldn't do it? Why were you the one to learn this and not me?" she raged, the pieces of the puzzle not quite fitting together in her brain.
However, any suspicions she might have had were interrupted by the emergence of Lorelai from the kitchen with a bucket of cookie dough ice-cream and two spoons.
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For the next few days Lorelai and Rory wallowed.
It was the one thing that Rory promised herself she would never sink to doing – after all, she didn't need any guy nearly enough to cry at merely the thought of him not being there, but that was before Logan.
Now she embraced her mother's ways of getting over a guy, because that was all she wanted to do. She wanted to get over Logan and get on with her life. She should have listened to her head in the beginning, as she usually did, instead of her heart, maybe then she wouldn't have been in this mess, maybe then she would still be on the path she started out on.
And that was exactly what she was going to do. She was going to pour herself into school and then into a career and forget the joy that was so fresh in her memory. Rory made that resolution with herself right then and right there and she fully intended on keeping it, at least she did before the phone rang.
The phone, even the stupid phone held memories of Logan, memories which of course sent her into a whole new crying fit. Not that it was Logan on the phone – or if he was, not that she would ever find out about it.
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Running to the ringing telephone, Lorelai hoped to God that she didn't answer it and hear Logan's voice because she was already feeling bad enough. She hated lying to her daughter, and that was why she made 'the' deal.
On the phone that day she promised Logan that, in two years, she would play Rory a message from him, whether she had moved on or not, and finally give her daughter the chance to make her own choice.
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