Hello people! Guess what? I've got myself an editor. She is Jackie, and she will be correcting my grammar, so you can
understand my stories better. Please, tell me if they are better now. Well, that was why I took so long to update, but I'll keep
updating as always. Anyway, love your reviews, so keep reviewing. Special thanks to the ones that have reviewed every
single chapter in this story. I truly appreciate you. Well, go and read and see what happens with our heroes.
They say that in order to be happy, one has to suffer, but I've suffered so much, I have stop believing in happiness.
The pain of loving you
Death or Life
Fire was everywhere, eating up anything that was on its way. People were screaming all around him, running for their lives, begging for
mercy. He ignored them all. He kept looking for his prey. A girl ran past him, a doll tightly held against her little chest. Van kept ignoring
them. He could remember a thousand villages in the same situation, a thousand moments like this, a thousand memories identical to the
display that was before his eyes. The only difference was that he was not the one causing it this time. It was Dilandu, and he had to find
him. A house crashed down besides him. A mother yelled for her baby, but her yell was lost in all the noise around her. Van didn't even
turn to look at her. He kept walking. They were not his problem. He didn't care about them. They meant nothing to him. He didn't know
the sound of their voices, had never seen their faces, and didn't know their names. They were people without faces, blurry images in front
of him. He didn't care for any of them. The only thing that was on his mind was destroying Dilandu. Everything else didn't matter. He
kept walking, shutting out the pleas of help, the visions of chaos in front of him, the smell of death, and the instinct to kill. They were
yelling at him to join the mercenaries and slaughter these people, but he fought them down, hiding them in the deepest part of his soul. If
he went with them, Hitomi would never forgive him. He would never be able to live knowing she hated him, so he kept walking, searching
for Dilandu. The bastard was avoiding him. He was hiding between all the smoke and fire that he had caused. He was like a shadow, a
ghost, and Van was getting tired of his games. For many years he had waited for an opportunity to rip his heart out, to show him just how
much he hated him. Now that he had one, he couldn't find him. He knew Dilandu was taunting him, waiting for his patience to snap. He
was probably very close to him, waiting for the perfect moment to attack. That was why Van's senses were all up. He couldn't lose
concentration. He had to be alert. One moment of distraction could case him his death, and for some mysterious reason, he didn't feel
like dying anymore. He wanted to live, and he wanted to kill Dilandu. A strange sound caught his attention. He turned his head towards it.
It was a small house that hadn't been touched by the fire. Everything around it was burning up, but the fire seemed to have respected that
little, humble house. Van went towards it. There was something about this house that reminded him of another time when he had still been
innocent. It reminded him of his last moments as a child.
Flashback
"Folken, let's go play!" A four year old Van told his brother.
"I'm too old to play with you" was the response from his very old 10 year-old brother.
"Please?" Van begged him, giving him a puppy-dog-eye look. His brother sighed. Van could be a pain in the ass most of the time, but
Folken didn't have the heart to turn him down when he used that look
"Fine, but it will be a quick game" Van nodded eagerly, and went for a ball. Folken could not understand why his brother liked to play
with balls. To him, it was a stupid game. All you had to do was run after it, but it was what his brother loved to play, and Van couldn't do
it alone. He smiled slightly so his brother didn't notice. Ok, so maybe he loved to play with the ball.
"Are we going to start or what?" He asked Van.
"Yes" he lowered his head "Thanks for playing with me, Folken."
Folken decided to be nice to his little brother.
"It is no problem."
End Flashback
Van scolded himself silently. There was no point in thinking back in the old days. They were as dead as his family. Besides, this was no
moment to mourn for what he had lost. He couldn't get distracted by stupid things like his past. He had erased it from his memory, so
why was it coming back to him now, of all times? Van made the attempt to stop going towards the house, but his body didn't listen to
him. There was something about that house that was pulling him to it. He stood in front of the door. The fire still hadn't touched it, so he
opened the door. It cracked as it opened, and what Van saw inside froze him. A little boy was trapped between the wall and a peace of
the ceiling that had fallen. The fire decided it was time to burn the house, and everything started to burn within seconds. Van couldn't
move. He was glued to the floor. He felt something pass besides him. He turned around and found a boy helping the other one. His heart
clenched.
"John, you have to get out of here, grab my hand!" The boy told the other one, but he was too afraid to listen to him.
"Come on, John, you don't want to die, right?" The older boy was getting desperate, "Please, grab my hand, brother!"
It was impossible. What was happening in front of Van was not real. His mind was playing tricks to him. There was no way that he was
watching this. There was no way that this was happening. It couldn't be. It was so…
Flashback
A boy of about five years suddenly found himself trapped in a room. Anywhere he looked was blocked by fire or wood. There was no
way out. Suddenly, he heard a crack and the roof started to collapse. Just as it was about to hit him, someone pushed him out of the way.
"Van, are you alright? Come on, we have no time. We must get out of here." Folken, Van's brother, told him as he dragged him to a little
hole in one of the walls.
"Get in, fast. Don't let anyone see you" he told Van.
Van, not able to think straight, did as told. He didn't understand what was happening. Only moments ago, he had been playing hide and
seek with his brother, and now…why was there fire everywhere? Why weren't their parents there? He suddenly realized that there were
soldiers everywhere. Funny, they didn't look like Fanelian soldiers. He was about to yell to them for help when his brother covered his
mouth.
"What do you think you are doing?"
"I was going to ask for help, Folken. They're soldiers. They'll help us." Folken looked at him and shook his head sadly.
"They are not going to help us" he whispered to him "No one is. We are on our own."
End Flashback
His brother had risked his life for him that night. He hadn't cared about the consequences, about what could happen to him. He had come
back for him, saving him, dying for him… The boy in front of him would do the same for his brother. He would die before leaving him
alone. The roof cracked, and another piece of ceiling fell between the boys. Van knew the boy wouldn't be able to save his brother. He
didn't have the strength that was needed. He was a mere human child that didn't have the power to save his brother. Something inside of
Van made him cringle.
"They are not going to help us. No one is. We are on our own"
Everything that was happening around him hit him. He stopped blocking the yells, the images, and the reality around him. He forgot
everything but what was happening in front of his eyes. He couldn't let those children die. He wouldn't let Dilandu's boys kill all these
people and destroy their village. He didn't want to be responsible for the death of more innocent people. He had to do something to help
them because he cared. He truly cared. Finally, after so many years of loneliness, of shutting people out, of hiding in the shadows, of not
letting anyone get close to him, and of forbidding himself to feel, finally, he cared for others. He dove to save the boys and brought them
outside, where there was no danger. He wouldn't let anyone die because of him. He wouldn't let them suffer Dilandu's rage.
Hitomi ran from house to house, helping anyone that she could. Being who she was, she just couldn't stay where it was safe and wait for
Van. She had to help these people. A woman carrying her babies barely managed to duck a piece of wood that was going directly
towards her. Hitomi quickly went to her side.
"Are you ok?"
The woman nodded before passing out. Her babies started to cry. Hitomi took them, but she didn't know what to do with them. Why, of
all times, did this have to happen? She knew nothing about babies. She tried to calm them down, but they wouldn't. Hitomi was getting
desperate. She didn't know what to do. She couldn't leave the mother lying on the ground, but she couldn't risk the babies' safety. She
bit her lips. Why were choices always difficult? A man came rushing to her, making everything easier.
"These are my babies" he told her panting. It was obvious he had been looking for them all over the village "Thank you for saving them"
"No problem, but she" Hitomi signaled to the woman on the ground "fainted. I don't think she is badly injured, but I'm pretty sure she
won't wake up anytime soon"
"Hold my babies" Hitomi took them back into her arms. The man bent and picked up the woman. Hitomi understood and searched for
the safest place she could see. She finally spotted a place that was almost safe and signaled for the man to follow her. The two of them
made their way towards it.
"Thank you. I think I can handle it from here." Hitomi was about to leave when something he said stopped her.
"I knew this would happen. I've been waiting for this ever since the Dragon massacred the other village. My parents lived there. They
didn't survive. No one did. I found their bodies as cold as graves, lying in their own pool of blood. If I could, I would make that monster
pay."
Hitomi stayed silent. Everywhere she went, people seemed to hate Van. She knew they had a right to hate him, but Hitomi still thought it
was unfair. They didn't understand all he had been through. She felt like laughing. It was ironic, really ironic, that she was now defending
someone that had tried to kidnap her not so long ago. It was almost unreal that she was now on the side of a mercenary, of someone who
had spent all his life hurting others. Her mind agreed with the man, but her heart was angered at his words.
"It is not the Dragon who is causing this" she told the man icily "And please, if you really want to help me, don't ever talk bad about the
Dragon. You don't know how much he has suffered" Before he could say anything else, she went away. Her mind screamed at her that
what he had done couldn't be justified by anything. She knew that it was right, but that didn't change the way she felt. After being with
him for so many months, she just couldn't see him the way she had seen him before. And, he had changed. He was no longer the cold
mercenary he used to be; his eyes weren't like ice anymore, his features weren't as rigid as before, he wasn't who he used to be. Hitomi
couldn't bare the thought of hating him. After everything they had been through, after all the times he had saved her, even disliking him
was beyond her. Hitomi surprisingly realized that, even after all the things she had said to him, and all the things he had done to her and
the world, she had never really hated him. She had known from the first time she had seen him, that she would never be able to hate him.
She had just been denying it from herself because she had sworn to hate everything that destroyed peace…
Van was helping a woman get out of her house. Hitomi could see the inn behind him. A shadow moved close to him. Van didn't
see it. He was already looking for someone to help. Out of nowhere, a knife stabbed him on the back. Before Van knew what
was happening, he fell to the floor, his blood coming out of his wound. His eyes became dull as life escaped from him. High
above him, Dilandu laughed, his hysterical laugh that made the hair on her neck rise. He pulled out a bloody knife from Van's
back and turned towards her…
Hitomi found herself on the floor. The vision had been too real to ignore. Van was in danger. He would be killed if she didn't do anything.
She had to find him before Dilandu did. She couldn't let him die.
Dilandu was very pleased with the outgoings of his work. All around him people cried for their lives. Their homes came crashing down as
the fire consumed them. Their dreams and hopes were ending as soon as his boys touched them. It was beautiful, perfect. The only thing
that was missing was the Dragon. Oh, he would really enjoy killing him. He would laugh as soon as life left his body, and then he would
go torture his slut. Maybe he would be kind enough to let them be together in the after life. Dilandu pulled his sword out of a young
woman. He smiled as he saw the blood on it. He went to find Van, killing anything that got close to him. He looked all over the village,
but it seemed like it had swallowed him up. He frowned. How was he supposed to have fun if he couldn't find his prey? A house came
down, and Dilandu turned to watch it fall. He was surprised to find Van get out of it with two kids in his arms. He put them down and
walked away. This was new. He had seen the Dragon care and protect the seer, but he had never seen him move a finger for others.
Now he was saving anyone who got in front of him. That girl was a bad influence on him. He followed the Dragon. He was intrigued by
his actions. It was impossible for a mercenary to feel anything towards others, but the Dragon clearly cared for these people. Dilandu was
very confused; the Dragon had never seen these people before. He had not shared one word with them. He hadn't known they existed
until now. Why did he care for them? Why did he risk his life for them? Was the Dragon…Could he feel? He could remember a thousand
occasions in which their eyes had crossed. He had seen nothing in the Dragon's eyes. They were brown voids. They seemed to be dead.
There was no excitement in them. There was no shine. There was nothing. Dilandu had been a mercenary all his life. He enjoyed what he
did, but he had never before crossed paths with someone that didn't feel anything. He was like a shell. Nothing made him happy or sad.
He was only angry. He had hated him for that. The Dragon didn't feel anything when he killed. As much as Dilandu enjoyed killing, there
was always that sense of doing something wrong. Guilt. He had always been able to ignore it, but that didn't mean he didn't feel it. He
was sure the Dragon never felt guilty. He had promised himself to kill him one day because if he killed him, then he would be able to be
just like him. Free of all emotions. Now, though, the Dragon seemed to be feeling. He had wanted to kill a monster. He would have to kill
its shadow. Dilandu saw how the Dragon looked for someone to help. He took his knife out and raised it way above his head. The
Dragon didn't pay any attention to him. He was in another world. Dilandu brought the knife down.
Van went to the inn because it was the place that had the most people in it. The first thing he did, though, was going to the stables and
freeing all the horses. He grabbed Hitomi's and his horses and brought them outside. He was sure they would need them to get out of the
village. After that, he went to help the people that were trapped inside the inn. Since he was draconian, the smoke didn't affect him, and
the fire didn't hurt him as much as it did to humans. He could resist a lot more than the weak humans. He took a woman in his arms and
brought her out of the inn. He laid her in the floor and went to look for someone else to help. He didn't notice the knife that rose above
him.
"Van, behind you!" Hitomi's voice raised above all the sounds around him.
He heard her scream and turned around before she had even finished. He grabbed the knife with both his hands inches before it could hit
him. He realized how close he had been to dying.
'Emotions truly make me weak' he thought, but then concentrated only on Dilandu. This was the moment he had been waiting for. It was
time to face his enemy. He took two steps from him and drew out his sword. Dilandu threw the knife aside and held his sword high above
him. They looked at each other before attacking without mercy. A metallic sound was heard every time their swords collided. Van
attacked with all the fury he had been holding inside. Just because he didn't want to kill innocent people didn't mean he didn't want to
destroy anything that was related to Zaibach. He still had to revenge his family. He still had to make Dornkirk pay for tricking him into
helping him. He had to bring Zaibach down, even if he had to do it rock by rock. He had to kill the piece of shit that was in front of him.
He blocked an attack that was going right to his head and spun around and went directly at his heart. His attack was blocked by
Dilandu's sword. He cursed loudly. This was getting him nowhere, if he kept attacking like he was, he would never be able to win. He
would just tire both of them out. He kept blocking Dilandu's attacks as he looked for a way to win.
"You are getting weaker, Dragon." Dilandu mocked at him.
"Not as weak as you are."
Dilandu's eyes turned icy. "You wish"
They kept attacking with fury and passion. Both of them wanted the other one dead. Both of them wanted to be the one responsible for
the deaths. Suddenly, Van found a way to kill him. He went to the ground and kicked him in the knees. Dilandu lost his balance and fell to
the ground. His sword flew from his hand. Van stood and put his sword to Dilandu's neck.
"You will die now" he told him. He raised his sword, prepared for the final hit, brought it down, and, in the last moment, another sword
blocked his. He angrily looked at who it was and found one of Dilandu's boys. He could deal with him. One struck and he would be
dead, and then he would be able to return to Dilandu.
"Van!"
His head turned towards her voice. He forgot about the boy and Dilandu as he searched for Hitomi. He found her on the roof of the inn.
"Van, behind you!"
Hitomi sighed in relief as she saw Van block the attack. She had been so scared for him. She was going to run towards him when
someone grabbed her from behind. She struggled to free herself, but found out she couldn't. She turned her face to look at the person
that was holding her. It was of the man that Van had hit the night before.
"Where is your knight now?" he whispered in her ear. Hitomi felt like throwing up. This man disgusted her like no one else had. He
brought her closer to his body, and Hitomi felt like dying. She had to do something. She just couldn't stand the touch of this man. She
kicked him in the shin and then, with her elbow, hit him in the gut. She turned and ran inside the inn. The man was right at her heels. She
didn't know where to hide. The place was burning up, and it seemed like there was no hiding place. She saw the stairs. She doubted for
a moment, but it was her only choice, and if she didn't act quickly, he would catch up with her. She made up her mind and climbed the
stairs. Once she was on the top floor, she slowly sat down, but she heard him come for her. She got to her feet and looked around her.
On the end of the hall, a door stood. She made her way towards it. She opened it and the cold air of the night hit her. She ignored it and
searched for a place to hide. There was none. She went to the edge. As she looked down, she realized that she would never be able to
make it. Tears formed in her eyes as she heard him reach the roof. She did the only thing that came to her mind.
"Van!"
Van went for his horse and mounted it. He ignored Dilandu's angry words and the boys that were trying to catch up with him. They were
not important. He would deal with them later. He would get his revenge later. Right now, all that mattered was saving Hitomi. He saw a
man come up behind her and recognized him as the leader of the group that had molested Hitomi the night before. Rage filled his whole
body. How dare he harass his Hitomi? He calculated the distance between the ground and the roof. An idea formed in his head. It was
the only way to save her. He looked behind him and saw Dilandu running after him. Dealing with him now wasn't wise. It would put
Hitomi in more danger. He too would have to wait.
"Hitomi, jump."
Jajaja, don't you hate cliffhangers? I know I do, but I had to do it. So, next chapter will be a little dark, but don't worry, calm
always comes after the storm, right? Maybe not. I haven't decided if I will end this with a happy or sad ending. Just kidding.
I know almost exactly how this will end, but it's still a long way till then. A lot of things have to happen before this story
finally reaches its end. Besides, as I already told you, this story has a life of its own. It does whatever it wants with me. You
should be glad. Well, tell me what you think of my beloved and new editor. If she doesn't do her job right, I'll just have to
torture her (just kidding, Jackie) And, Tia Williams, you better be reading this story because you have to tell me what you
think. All others who review or read and don't review , thanks for liking my story. Your review keep me writing, so go and
review!