I have decided to reveal the true genius behind this mercilously mirthful menagerie. My real name is Acke Dilldock. So lay off of poor vinnie the geek! Write me horrible death threats and merciless reviews. Sue me-see if I care! I LOVE TERRA-she is way cooler than Raven! HA! So there!
But first-the Props! (from vinnie, or perhaps not...)
Sue H: Glad someone is laughing... Seriously, please continue to read and review! Yeah, you're not a pervert, like I'm not... (Ouch-stop it-that hurt, Brain!)
Martson: Don't die, I still need you to cover for me...oops...
Outlawarcher: I don't understand-I'm still waiting for my picture... . Do you think I was presumptuous to ask for an autograph?
Schizo and proud: Yeah, I try not to laugh while I'm sewing while driving and drinking Coke...I always stab my big toe... You know, a naked pic of BB might be worth something...
RBosaZ1: Thanks! And relation to Bebe Rebozo? I thought the players were the 'idiots,' not the fans-but who am I to contradict you... Next Red Sox championship...2096! Go Sox!
Dove of Night: You're looking in the wrong place...check in the sofa, where all the coins and gum wrappers hide. Glad you weren't gonna hurt me-then that would be 4 people I have to put restraining orders on...
Gaarasama: Huh? I have no life! I have done not a single interesting, embarrassing, or indictable thing in my life!
2Lazy2Register: I should try the chalk thing...the candles didn't work.. Me too-can't wait for more Raven-y goodness!
RenegadeMustang/raises glass/ Here's to dying with honor (while screaming like a little girl...)
Darkest Midnight: You believe? Cool! Then there's still hope Raven will... and what's with the 'w/e?' Is that 'white elephant,' or 'week end,' or 'wussie eunuch,' or...
Terra Shiori Logan: You're sure you want 'me' to keep writing? Sorry-don't get your panties all in a wad about the age thing! Hee hee-'Vin,' reveal his feelings? Hee hee...
Rivertam: Hee hee. Read my other Raven stories... oh-and don't forget to leave glowing reviews! Thanks in advance...hee hee...
Saint H: All guys are perverts on the inside? You sound like a girl when you say that...oh...(Brain: Moron!) Ummm...yeah...uh...oh yeah-AckeDilldockis the author-pervert! I spelled that right, didn't I...
Saint H: Didn't I already get you? I mean, prop you... Yes, of course-I knew I forgot something...with no clothes...you don't think she'd mind? What is 'shashafarffarara,' or whatever the hell that was? I don't even know if I should laugh... and yes, you win-here is your cookie...mmmm-chocolate chip...
Magoo, the reviewer formerly known as 'I think i forgot my name', prior to being known as 'Dory': Whew! I'm not gonna write any more, but I think 'Martson' is... Sorry, I so have a crush on Raven... (Brain: Not me!) Yeah, you get the sounds right-but what is this 'loyal (so far)' junk? You are thinking of dumping me? Horrors! (Brain: Wuss!) Please, tell me what I (I mean Acke Dilldock) needs to do to earn your everlasting loyalty.
Malcore Xan'thex: Dang! I forgot that, too! I need to check with you guys first, next time, before I write to Raven. Thanks, Rev.
Lost Inside: Hmmm...you actually does knows your baseball...Thanks, but as I explained, all the credit (and indictments) must go to Acke Dilldock...
Rivertam: You again? Glorioskies! Umm...how do you know that Star doesn't wear a brassiere? Have you seen something I need desperately to see? My email address is...
TameranianRaven: Well...I think Raven might work with some of the X-Men, or Superman. You know-the guys who could kick her...Owww! Umm...yeah, I like Raven a lot...but 'lust' is such a crude term. No-not love, either...(Brain: Lying sack of...)
To the rest of you-who did not review:Acke Dilldocksays he is gonna kick your ass!
( 2nd letter form 'V's' lawyer follow lame-ass pagebreak mandated by fanfictiondotnet administration pinheads)
Pierre 'Catfish' La Coque, Assn..A.H, l.e.
Law offices of Dewey, Cheatum, and Howe.
10900 W. East 10th Street.
Flagellate, LA 12522-3124
Ph 1-800- SC-REWYU (727-3998)
April 26, 2005
Re: Vinnie the Geek vs. 'Vincent Del Greco' et al
To Whom it May Concern,
It has come to our attention that some of the readers of this fictional account are under the mistaken impression that some of the characters, places, names, events, or descriptions used therein, are taken from real-life characters, places, names, evens, or descriptions.
Nothing, I assure you, could be further from the truth. The 'Vincent Del Greco,' author, named in these correspondences is in no way related to, or based on the beloved author you know as 'Vinnie the Geek.' The Vincent in this story is an entirely fictional character, concieved by the brilliant mind of 'Vinne the Geek.' Mr. Geek has a fertile imagination, and has no need to pluck characters and situations from real life in order to create interesting interactions and situations in his stories.
Mr. Geek would like me to inform his readers that he has never participated in illegal activities when he was at college. He has never gotten drunk, and spent a night in an elevator, going up and down; up and down, or passed nights worshiping the porcelain god after indulging in too much 3.2 Coors. He has never dated a 'slumpbuster.' He still firmly denies ever having committed statutory rape, for which he was never formally charged.
There is no truth to the rumor that Vinnie went to Eskimo Joe's 'grabbing ass,' after consuming massive abounts of 'cowboy coolade.' Mr. Geek was not a marching band geek in highschool. And, although he did threaten to join a commune, he did not 'moon' the dormatory.
Mr. Geek assures the readers that, although he has had many associations with unsavory characters, who did engage in the recreational use of illegal substances, he has no memory of ever partaking, himself. Mr. Geek does not drink, smoke, have sexual relations, cheat on income taxes, pick up stray prostitutes, or collect pennies. He does not abuse animals or small children. He contributes to charitable organizations, and drives an old automobile, in order to help save the environment. He does not chew gum, or eat sugary snack foods.
In addition, Mr. Geek assures me that he has never been a member of the American Nazi Party, never used a 'swear word' in his entire life, and was breast fed. He has never ridden a motorcycle without a helmet, or participated in skydiving, or other hazardous activities. He has never physically assaulted his cousin, or broken any bones-his or another's. The rumors of his secretly wishing to be a woman are not true. He is not obsessed with Raven, Starfire, Little Annie Fanny, Barbara Bush, Adolph Hitler, Julius Ceasar, or Pee Wee Herman.
Thank you for your rapt attention. I have assured Mr. Geek that this letter will have the desired effect of squelching all the nasty rumors and conjecture surrounding the real and fictional authors involved in the interactions with Miss Raven of the Teen Titans.
Sincerely,
Pierre 'Catfish' La Coque
P.S. I am also soliciting funds for the 'Save the Geek' fund. I really need to get paid.
( this is the pagebreak-this is the pagebreak-whee! isn't this great!)
Ummm...review. (Brain: Or else!) Oooh! Oooh! Almost forgot-be sure to check my bio page often, to see the latest Ego-Meter reading, and the much-coveted 'Review of the Week!' And other occasional nonsense...