Chapter 4 Family Life and Old Wounds

Later, when they had unloaded everything they had taken to the lake, they went down to the gardens. Anakin sat on the grass with Leia and Artoo. Leia was fascinated by the little droid as he beeped at her, swiveled his head and blinked, "Artoo!" She exclaimed as she touched his blinking light.

Anakin looked over at Padme, sitting at the garden table, holding Zak's data pad and patiently testing him on what he had studied while they were at the lake. It made Anakin happy to see that she had become so fond of him. Then he looked over to his brother, sitting on a patch of grass, meditating once again. Before Anakin could move, Luke toddled over to him and plopped abruptly into Obi-Wan's lap. Obi-Wan, without opening his eyes, wrapped both arms around Anakin's son and Luke sat back, resting his head on Obi-Wan's chest and putting his tiny hands on Obi-Wan's arms. Anakin felt a lump rise in his throat; this was Obi-Wan, he thought. For so long, he had forgotten how kind and gentle he could be. He tried to blink back a tear, but it spilled down his cheek.

"Daddy?" Leia said as she reached up to touch his face.

"It's alright, Baby; Daddy's happy." He assured her as he pulled her to him. He looked over again to see that Luke had curled up into a ball in Obi-Wan's lap and was falling asleep. Obi-Wan opened his eyes, smiled at Anakin and looked down at the little boy dozing in his lap. Anakin's eyes blurred as he watched Obi-Wan touch Luke's head gently and then lay down with Luke, still sleeping, on his chest.

"…Zak? Did you hear my last question?" Padme asked when Zak did not answer.

"Uh…no…umm…I…" Zak answered, clearly distracted.

"What are you…?" Padme followed his gaze to see Obi-Wan, lying in the grass with baby Luke on top of him. "Oh."

She turned to looked at her husband who was sitting in the grass, cuddling their daughter tightly; he turned his gaze to her, his face streaked with happy tears, and smiled at her. She had not seen him this happy in a long time; she smiled back at him, feeling her own tears welling up. She looked back to see Zak, grinning from ear to ear, "I like to see you happy, Lady Padme." He said.

"Doesn't that bother you?" Padme asked.

"What? Seeing you happy?" Zak asked, guilelessly.

"No, Master Obi-Wan and Luke." She replied.

"…No…should it?" He answered, clearly puzzled.

Then he realized what she meant, "Oh, no, Lady Padme. I could never be jealous of Luke." He said. "Master Obi-Wan has enough love for both of us; and you, and Master Anakin and Leia."

Padme shook her head, "You truly are a remarkable little boy." She told him.

"Why?" He asked.

Obi-Wan took in the scent of fresh grass as he lay on his back. Luke clutched the fabric of his tunic as he dozed contently on Obi-Wan's chest. Obi-Wan could feel the Force emanating from him even as he slept. So much like Anakin, he was, the Force was that strong in him. Once again, Obi-Wan tried, without success, to imagine life without his former apprentice. He put his arm on Luke's back and felt a slight twinge in his shoulder. Anakin's words came back to him, '…you're always going to have trouble with this.' He hoped that his brother was wrong. "Me too." Anakin's voice echoed in his mind. Obi-Wan turned his head to see Anakin, holding Leia on his lap, staring at him. "Must you always do that?" He sent back as he smiled over at Anakin. Anakin smiled mischievously back at him, "yes."

"They're doing it again; aren't they." Padme said.

Zak looked at Anakin and then at his master, "Yes." He replied. "Does that still bother you?"

Padme paused momentarily before answering, "No…well, maybe…yes… a little." She finally admitted.

Zak nodded knowingly.

"It's alright; it's hard to understand, but you'll get used to it. And it doesn't mean that Master Anakin doesn't love you as much." He told her. "He loves you in a different way."

"How do you know that, Zak?" Padme wondered.

Now it was Zak's turn to pause, "I don't know; I just know." He answered.

"You can sense it; is that what you mean?" Padme asked.

"Yes, it's, you know…"

"…a Jedi thing; I understand." She finished. "Thank you, Zak."

"Well, your welcome…I think; but I don't know what I did." He replied.

"You helped me not to feel so jealous." She said, plainly.

"Oh…that's good." Zak answered, smiling.

As twilight came on, Anakin stood up, holding Leia in his arms. She arched her back so that she was hanging upside-down. Anakin twisted her around and dangled her, upside down in his hands. She giggled, happily and then, when Anakin swung her out and back, that giggle turned into an enthusiastic laugh. Still swinging her, Anakin carried her over to Padme, flipped her up and deposited her in Padme's waiting lap.

"I think I should go rescue Obi-Wan." He told her as he looked towards Obi-Wan who had sat up in an effort to stop Luke from pouncing on his stomach; undeterred, Luke was now attempting to climb on top of his shoulders. His brother was reluctant to discourage him, but Anakin could feel how painful it was for him.

"No, Daddy." Leia cried. "More."

"No more, Leia." He said firmly; then seeing the disappointed look on her face, he relented. "Maybe later."

"All white." She replied.

Anakin smiled, "All white? Do you mean 'alright'?" He asked.

"Said dat! All white!" She answered. "Silly Daddy!"

"Yes, but now silly Daddy has to go fetch your naughty brother." Anakin said as he turned to his besieged friend.

"Notty Luke!" Leia replied.

"Yes, very naughty." He answered then walked swiftly over to Obi-Wan.

"That's enough, Luke; I think you've tortured Master Obi-Wan enough." He said patiently as he lifted Luke up.

"No!" Luke protested, struggling to get free.

"Umm…yes." Anakin said. "Stop fighting."

But Luke continued to struggle.

"Stop it, Luke." He repeated. "Master Obi-Wan is tired."

"No!" Luke cried.

Anakin gave Luke a small crack on his backside; not hard, but enough to make Luke realize he meant business, "All white." Luke said reluctantly without even shedding a tear.

"You didn't have to do that, Anakin." Obi-Wan told him.

"Oh, yes I did. He needs to learn he can't just go crawling all over people; especially you." Anakin answered. "You don't see him as often as I do; he's stubborn just like me."

"Nobody can be…"

"Don't say it, I already know. But believe me, my son is a very close second." Anakin said as he shifted Luke to one side and held his hand out to Obi-Wan with the other.

Obi-Wan took that hand and Anakin helped him to his feet, "Well, like father like son, I suppose." He replied.

Luke began to struggle again and held his hands out to Obi-Wan, "Ma Obi!" He cried.

"No, now quit before I have to give you another swat." Anakin told him.

"Mean Daddy!" Luke said, pouting.

"Yes, I know I'm a mean Daddy." Anakin agreed.

"Please!" Luke pleaded.

Anakin started to say no, but then he caught Obi-Wan's thought, "It's alright; I'll take him."

"Alright, Luke; but you have to promise to be good." He said, giving in.

"Pwomise." Luke vowed and Anakin handed him over to his brother.

True to his word, Luke contented himself with wrapping his arms around Obi-Wan's neck and resting his head on his shoulder; Obi-Wan hugged him tightly.

Anakin shook his head and smiled.

"What?" Obi-Wan asked.

"You're heart is so big, my brother; I'm sorry it took me so long to realize that." Anakin replied.

Obi-Wan just smiled back at him, not knowing how else to respond. They walked to where Zak, Padme and Leia were waiting and went inside as the stars began to appear in the night sky.

Later, after that had eaten dinner, Anakin found Obi-Wan out on the landing by the lake observing the constellations, "Am I disturbing you?" He asked.

"No, not at all. I was just thinking; but you probably already knew that." Obi-Wan answered.

"Actually, I'm learning how to control it. It takes a little effort, at least right now; but I should be able to stop doing it involuntarily, without even thinking about it." Anakin informed him.

"Really? That's good, Anakin; for both of us." Obi-Wan said.

"Yes, I know. I don't like knowing what you're thinking all the time, and I'm sure it must be uncomfortable for you to know I'm in your head all the time." Anakin replied.

Obi-Wan chuckled, "Well, disconcerting anyway." He admitted.

"I thought maybe you'd let me rub your shoulder down again." Anakin suggested.

"That might be a good idea; your son gave me a bit of a work out this afternoon." Obi-Wan said.

"I am sorry about that, brother. He can be a handful sometimes….well, most of the time." Anakin replied.

"That's alright. I don't mind really, but…" Obi-Wan answered.

"I know, right now it hurts." Anakin finished his thought.

They walked over to one of the lounge chairs on the balcony facing the lake and Obi-Wan sat down on the edge, "Don't you want to lie down?" Anakin asked.

"Not really; but I will if it would be easier for you." Obi-Wan answered.

"It's up to you, but I think it would be better if you did." Anakin replied.

"Alright." Obi-Wan said amiably.

Anakin repeated what he had done earlier in the day. Again, he let the Force course through him, blending with that of his brother and into Obi-Wan's healing muscles. The ache that had almost disappeared after that first session was back with a vengeance, and Anakin regretted having let Luke loose on his still-ailing brother.

"Obi-Wan, why do you still think that Qui-Gon's death was your fault?" Anakin asked.

Obi-Wan did not answer, and Anakin pressed him again.

"Why don't you want to talk about this? I think it would do you good." He insisted.

"That's old history, Anakin. I see little point in bringing it up again." Obi-Wan replied.

"Don't do this; I know it's still on your mind. Talk to me." Anakin said.

"Drop it, Anakin." Obi-Wan said stubbornly.

Realizing that Obi-Wan did not wish to pursue it, but reluctant to let it drop, Anakin took the lead, "It was not your fault that you became separated." He started.

"Anakin, I don't wish…"

"Maybe not, but you need to talk about this." Anakin interrupted.

"Alright; but you weren't there. I allowed Darth Maul to push me down three levels; that's how we became separated." Obi-Wan informed him.

"Wait…you allowed him; are you saying you wanted to leave Qui-Gon alone to face Maul?" Anakin questioned.

"No, I didn't want to. But I opened myself up for attack; if I hadn't done that, Maul would not have been able to throw me off that walkway." Obi-Wan explained.

"Good grief, Obi-Wan; you were only an apprentice, and you had never even faced a Sith before. You're lucky he didn't kill you too." Anakin argued.

"Anakin, didn't you think it was my fault?" Obi-Wan asked.

"That's not fair, Obi-Wan; I was only 9 when that happened; and you, well, you didn't seem to like me that much." Anakin objected.

"You thought I let Darth Maul kill him, didn't you." Obi-Wan said.

When Anakin didn't say anything, Obi-Wan continued, "You thought that I wanted him to die so that you wouldn't be trained."

Anakin did not answer.

"Anakin?" Obi-Wan persisted.

Anakin sighed deeply, "Yes, I did…at first…but then…you told me that you would train me." He finally admitted. "I felt your grief and I knew how wrong I was; "But that has nothing to do with you believing this was your fault. Besides, if Qui-Gon had not gone rushing headlong after Maul and given you a chance to catch up, you could have fought him together; if it was anyone's fault, it was his." Anakin finished.

"You weren't there, Anakin; how could you know what happened?" Obi-Wan replied.

"Qui-Gon told me." Anakin said. "Now what do you think?"

"I don't know." Obi-Wan answered. "Maybe it wasn't my fault."

"That's better." Anakin said, satisfied, "now, how's your shoulder?"

"Better; now, it's my turn." Obi-Wan replied.

"Your turn?" Anakin asked. "Alright, but, not tonight."

I know, I promised action, but if you hang onfor the next couple chapters, your patience will be rewarded; that's whenthe action will begin!