Disclaimer - I only own the idea and the plot to this story, all of the characters from the "Beyblade" series' are owned by their creators and companies. Namely, not me or else the show would be completely yaoi - shame I don't own it then.
I own my depression - wish I didn't but hey, that's all I own here.
Part of the Sorrows collection by Georgia Hiwatari
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Last Resort
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Thousands of people die, everyday someone dies, and everyday someone dies from suicide, and everyday, someone asks "why?"
Why would someone want to kill themselves?
Friends and family would ask why would someone so smart, kind, friendly, loving, etc. want to throw all of what life had to offer away?
They grieve afterwards with only one thing running through their minds; "Why?"
And all they will never know or fully understand, the only one who knew "why" is gone and will never return.
What people see and believe is nothing but the outside of a person, the outside of a dying soul.
A person may appear smart, king, friendly, loving, etc. to everyone who sees them, but inside, inside they are in deep pain - sorrow, anger, hatred - they all consume a person, they destroy them, slowly torturing them until there is nothing left but an empty shell.
An answer as to why people may commit suicide may be left in a note or a letter of sorts, but the only true answer that a person has as to "why?", is that they do it because to them, they are already dead - there is nothing left, nothing to live for, no hopes, no dreams, everything is gone.
Inside they have died - bullying, family problems, depression and other factors have caused them to die inside.
They, who commit suicide, are just finishing what someone or something else had already started, it's only fair to themselves.
Why?
Why do I tell you this?
Why now?
Now, because I am one of these people. I am the next one to be added to the list of suicidal deaths - I have nothing left to live for, for I am long gone and now my body will follow where I have been for a number of years.
Now it's my turn to end what someone else has started, it's time for my suffering to end.
Don't ask why, why someone like me would want to do this. The truth is you have never known me, how I feel and what I'm really like.
That's the problem with people - they think that they know you, when in fact, they have never had any idea what you're really like deep down.
I can only hope that in telling you this, that you will finally understand, even if only a little, how I might feel after reading this and how others, like myself, feel.
Do not look down upon us, or tell people how much we had going for us in the future, because we aren't ashamed of what we've done and we had noting left to live for - remember we're already dead on the inside.......
...........our bodies are only just joining us.......
Rei.
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End
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Yes, it's depressing and deals with suicide but I felt like this needed some light shone upon it as most people don't understand what goes through peoples' minds when they commit this last resort - I hope that people who read this will actually understand a bit more about this topic as not many people do - which in my view should be discussed more openly.
Again, if you want me to write about something tat's perhaps bothering you, or you want to know about something please ask me as I will gladly write about it - especially when I'm depressed.
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Georgia Hiwatari x