Well, since you didn't get anything over the weekend, I'll go ahead and post another chapter to make up for it. I'm glad you're enjoying it! Just 3 more chapters after this one...

Chapter 27 Zak's Dilemma

"Just by being with them, Anakin; I can feel it just sitting here with you." Obi-Wan answered.

"It's not just Anakin's love you feel, Obi-Wan; it is your own as well. You are more powerful together than a half dozen Jedi." Qui-Gon told them. "Never, even in Master Yoda's lifetime, has there been anyone as powerful as the two of you combined."

"So Obi-Wan's destiny is tied up with mine?" Anakin asked.

"Yes; it always has been. Even if I had not died when I did, Obi-Wan would still have become your friend, your mentor and your brother." Qui-Gon revealed.

"But then wouldn't you have trained me?" Anakin wondered.

"Yes, but Obi-Wan would have been involved with that training; and you would have learned from both of us." Qui-Gon answered. "And then again, perhaps Obi-Wan was meant to train you after all; it is difficult to say."

There was silence between them then, broken only when Anakin finally spoke up.

"I should tell Master Yoda what's happened." He said.

"He already knows, Anakin; he felt it. But you should speak with him all the same." Qui-Gon replied. "For now, I will leave you. But do not worry; I will not be far if you need me."

"What do I do now?" Anakin asked.

"First talk to Master Yoda; and then we can decide together what to do next." Obi-Wan answered.

"Alright; but while I'm talking to Master Yoda, you get yourself something to eat and rest." Anakin said.

"I've been resting, Anakin; all night and most of the morning." Obi-Wan told him.

"No, what you were doing was not restful. You're tired, I can feel it; whether you want to admit it or not." Anakin argued.

Obi-Wan closed his eyes and sighed wearily. He knew that Anakin was right; he was tired, bone tired. When he opened his eyes again, Anakin was staring at him with concern.

"Why don't you just rest here for a while? The floor is padded and there's already a blanket and a pillow here. I'll make sure no one bothers you and either Zak or I will bring you something to eat later." He suggested.

Obi-Wan only nodded; suddenly that seemed like a very good idea. He pulled the blanket around him, lay down and positioned the pillow under his head. Anakin stayed for several minutes until he heard Obi-Wan heave a great relaxing sigh. When he sensed that his brother had fallen asleep, he quietly stood up, walked over to the door and hit the control panel. When the door opened, he nearly stumbled over Zak who had still been sitting in front of it.

"Wha…" Zak managed to get out before…

"Shh." Anakin interrupted as he shut the door behind them.

"Is Master Obi-Wan alright?" Zak whispered.

"Yes, but he's resting right now; so we should leave him alone for a little while." Anakin told him quietly. "It's nearly lunchtime, why don't we find something to eat?"

Zak nodded as Anakin punched several buttons on the door control pad.

"Are you locking him in?" Zak asked.

"No, he can get out, but I'm worried about the twins; they can open this door if they want to, but not if it's locked." Anakin explained with a sly smile. "There, that should keep them out."

"What was it, Master Anakin?" Zak asked as they walked toward the kitchen.

"What was what?" Anakin asked.

"What I felt, it was coming from that room." Zak answered.

"You felt something?" Anakin asked, taken aback.

"Yes, it was…powerful." Zak answered. "Couldn't you feel it?"

"Well, yes; but I thought….what did it feel like, Zak?" Anakin asked.

"Umm…like…umm…well, like love." Zak finally managed to say.

"Unbelievable; and you could feel it? Out in the hallway?" Anakin asked in wonder.

"Yes; it was very strong. Where did it come from?" Zak asked.

"Oh, Zak; I think what you were feeling came from Master Obi-Wan and…and me." Anakin told him.

"Oh…Maybe you should tell Master Yoda." Zak suggested.

"Yes, I'm going to; because I still don't completely understand it myself." Anakin replied.

"Luke and Leia felt it too." Zak informed him.

"They did?"

They had reached the kitchen and Padme heard Zak's last words, "Yes, they were playing in their room and suddenly they just got up and walked down the hall." She explained. "Then they just stayed there until Zak said it…how did you put it, Zak?"

"Dampened; it's still there, but it's like it's muffled." Zak said as he tried to define it.

"Where is it now?" Anakin asked.

Zak looked up at him for a moment, thinking, "I think it's with you…or part of it is." He replied haltingly.

"Part of it?" Anakin asked.

"Yes, the other part is…umm…down there." Zak said as he pointed down the hall.

"What happened, Anakin?" Padme asked.

"I don't know exactly; something wonderful." Anakin answered. "Qui-Gon said…"

"Master Obi-Wan's master? But he's…" Zak interrupted.

"There are many things you don't understand yet, Zak; Master Qui-Gon is able to speak with us through the Force. He knows everything that's happened…he even knows about you." Anakin explained. "And he said that this happened because I have learned to trust Obi-Wan completely."

Padme turned away, the old feelings of envy had just popped into her mind and she did not want Anakin to see that, "Oh no, Padme; don't turn away. I can share this with you too." Anakin said as he reached for her. "Here, let me show you."

"Umm…I think I'll see if I can find where Boba has got to." Zak said and, wishing discreetly to leave them to be alone, quietly backed out of the kitchen; his departure went unnoticed.

Instead of hunting for Boba, however, Zak headed down to the pond to be alone. He was not entirely sure how he would fit into this new picture, and he needed to think about what he would do now. He was beginning to wonder if there was even a place for him there at all. He did not feel jealousy or anger toward either Master Anakin or his own master, nor Master Anakin's family, he was happy for them; what he was feeling now was uncertainly and loneliness. He would go back to the Temple and, since he was nearing his thirteenth birthday, gather his things in preparation for assignment elsewhere. He was too close now to the end of the age of choosing to hope for a new master. The joy he had felt when Jedi Master Obi-Wan Kenobi had chosen him as his next apprentice had been replaced by sadness and a feeling of utter failure. He knew that he would never measure up to Anakin Skywalker in Master Obi-Wan's eyes; he was a disappointment. He would not cry; he would not cry; he would not….

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"Sackie's sad." Luke said suddenly as he picked up a block through the Force and laid it on top of the one that Gemma had just placed on the floor.

"Aw; why, Lukie?" Leia asked.

"Dunno." Luke answered and got up.

"Whatcha gonna do?" Leia asked.

"Fine 'im." Luke said as we walked toward the door.

"Whewe is he?" Leia asked.

"Ou'side." Luke replied when he reached the doorway.

"Dat's twouble, Lukie; Mommy said stay hewe." Leia warned.

"Can't." Luke told her. "Don' tell." Then he was gone.

"Watchoo gonna do?" Gemma asked.

"Nuffin." Leia answered.

Luke walked down the hallway until he came to the opening into the dining room. He peered around the corner to see if his parents were there; the room was empty and he could hear his father talking in the kitchen. As quick as his short little legs could carry him, he headed for the door leading out to the veranda and the back lawn. Taking a quick look around to be sure no one had seen him, he triggered the door control and went outside. He had a feeling that Zak was near the pond and headed in that direction.

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The moment Anakin touched her, Padme felt the most overwhelming feeling of warmth and love; it was so strong that for a moment, she could not breathe.

"Oh my." She whispered.

"There, isn't it wonderful?" Anakin asked.

"Oh, it's…Oh Anakin, it's beautiful." Padme exclaimed. "Is this what Zak felt?"

"Yes." Anakin answered.

"Can Obi-Wan feel it too?" Padme asked.

"It's part of Obi-Wan, my love." Anakin told her.

"Well, you're right, it's wonderful." Padme said as she allowed him to cradle her in his arms.

"I told you." Anakin said, tightening his hold on her so that she could bask in the warmth of the love now radiating from him.

They remained like that for a while until Anakin remembered what he and Zak had come into the kitchen for.

"Zak and I were going to fix something for lunch." He said.

"Oh, I can do that for you." Padme insisted. "Zak, what do you…Anakin, where did he go?"

Anakin smiled, "he probably thought we wanted to be alone. He might have gone back down the hall." He answered.

"You go find him and I'll go and get the children; we might as well all eat together." Padme said.

Anakin nodded and went through the dining room toward the hallway. When he looked in the direction he thought Zak would be, however, it was empty; he went the other way into the front room. Only Boba was there, watching something on the view screen.

"Boba, have you seen Zak?" He asked.

"Nope." Boba answered. "I didn't know he was missing."

"I didn't either." Anakin replied before heading to the children's room, thinking maybe he was playing with them.

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Padme noticed Luke's absence as soon as she walked into the room, "Where's Luke, Leia?" She asked.

"Gone." Leia answered.

"Gone where, honey?" Padme asked.

"To be wif Sackie." Leia told her.

"Where?" Padme asked, trying not to sound too concerned.

"Ou'side." Leia replied.

"Leia, honey; why didn't you come and tell Mommy?" Padme asked.

"Couden; I pwomised Lukie." Leia explained.

"Well, you should have told Mommy; now we don't know where he is." Padme said sternly.

"Zak's missing too." Anakin said from the doorway.

"Yes, I know; Luke went out to find him." Padme replied. "What's the matter with Zak; going off alone like that? He should have known that Luke would do something like this."

"Padme, that's not fair." Anakin protested.

Padme put her hand to her mouth. "I know; I'm sorry. It's just that now we don't know where Luke is; he could be anywhere." She said.

"No, Mommy; not anywhewe; he's wif Sackie." Leia corrected.

"How do you know that, Leia?" Anakin asked.

"He's my bwover; I know." Leia explained.

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"Sackie sad." Luke said as he sat down in front of Zak.

"You shouldn't be out here by yourself, Luke." Zak replied.

"Hafta make Sackie feel bettew." Luke told him. "Coz Sackie sad."

"I'm not sad, Luke." Zak said.

"Yes you auw; Lukie knows." Luke answered as he patted Zak's leg. "Lukie a'ways knows how Sackie feels."

Zak looked down into his lap; Luke bent his head under Zak's face and then looked up at him.

"Don' be sad, Sackie; you can come hewe anytime." He said.

"No, I can't; not anymore." Zak replied.

"Why?" Luke asked.

"Because I won't be with Master Obi-Wan anymore." Zak answered.

"Why?" Luke said.

"I'm not good enough." Zak told him.

"You wong, Sackie." Luke replied.

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Obi-Wan was dreaming; he did not usually do this, but he was enjoying it, so he let the dream continue. It was a dream about the early days with Qui-Gon. It was early morning and he did not want to get up even though he knew that he and Qui-Gon would have to leave soon.

"Get up, Obi-Wan." Qui-Gon was saying. "Not yet, Master." The child Obi-Wan answers. "Come now; you have something important to attend to." Qui-Gon persists. "Please, Master; just a few more minutes." Obi-Wan pleads. "No, get up now…"

"Obi-Wan." Qui-Gon called.

"Not yet, Master; in a little while." Obi-Wan mumbled in his sleep.

"You're dreaming, Obi-Wan; wake up." Qui-Gon said.

Obi-Wan moaned softly and opened his eyes, "Qui-Gon?"

"I'm sorry, Padawan; but there's something you need to do." Qui-Gon told him.

"What is it?" Obi-Wan asked.

"Your apprentice needs you." Qui-Gon answered. "He is troubled."

"Troubled? About what?" Obi-Wan asked.

"Go to him, Obi-Wan." Was all Qui-Gon would say.

"I will; but what's bothering him?" Obi-Wan asked but received no answer.

He rose stiffly and left the room, heading for the veranda door. Anakin, Padme, Leia and Gemma were already there and about to go out.

"I'm looking for Zak; do you know where he went?" Obi-Wan asked.

"According to Leia; he and Luke are outside somewhere." Anakin answered.

"Luke? What's he doing out there?" Obi-Wan asked.

"Apparently looking for Zak." Anakin replied.

"Foun' him." Leia corrected.

"Well, I need to find him, too; do you know where they are Leia?" Obi-Wan asked.

"Yep; show you." Leia answered.

"Padme, why don't you stay up here with Gemma? I'm sure Luke is fine." Anakin said.

Padme only nodded as they walked out.

"Dis way, Daddy." Leia said, taking his hand and leading the way down to the pond.

As they rounded the stand of bushes, they could see Zak with his back towards them and Luke sitting in front of him.

"There you are." Obi-Wan said as he approached.

"I'm sorry, Master Kenobi; I didn't know you were looking for me." Zak answered as he stood up and bowed to him.

"Master Kenobi? What's the matter with you, Zak?" Obi-Wan asked.

"Sackie finks he's goin' 'way." Luke told them.

"Going where?" Obi-Wan asked, lifted Zak's chin so he could look him in the eye. "What's this all about then?"

Anakin reached out into Zak's mind….

"Luke, let's leave Zak and Master Obi-Wan alone for a bit." He said.

Luke looked up at him and understood, "All white, Daddy." He replied.

Anakin took the hands of both his children and headed back up to the house.

"Sit down, Zak." Obi-Wan said when they were gone.

They both sat down together; Zak stared over at the pond.

"Now, talk to me." Obi-Wan instructed.

Zak remained silent and Obi-Wan sighed, "I can't read your mind like Master Anakin, Zak; you have to tell me what's wrong." He said.

"I can't either." Zak replied.

"Can't what? You have to do better than that." Obi-Wan told him. "What's going on?"

"I know what you're going to do." Zak informed him.

"You do? Is this some new talent you've come up with? Because if it is, we should let Master Yoda know." Obi-Wan said. "Maybe you should tell me what it is; I might decide it's not what I want to do after all."

"I'm not good enough, am I." Zak told him.

"What?" Obi-Wan asked.

"I can't be like Master Anakin." Zak continued.

"And what does that have to do with you're not being good enough?" Obi-Wan inquired.

"You're disappointed with me." Zak said.

"Who told you that?" Obi-Wan questioned.

"No one; I just know." Zak answered.

"No you don't; not if that's what you think." Obi-Wan replied.

"But I can't do what he can do." Zak said.

"What in blazes are you talking about?" Obi-Wan asked in confusion.

"I felt it; what you did together, and I can't do that." Zak answered.

"Oh, Zak; no one can. That's something that only Master Anakin and I can do. I don't expect you to have to do that." Obi-Wan assured him. "Is that why you think I'm disappointed with you?"

"Well, aren't you?" Zak asked.

"No, of course not; and I'm sorry if I made you feel that way." Obi-Wan answered.

"But I can never be like Master Anakin." Zak proclaimed.

"I don't want you to be; I want you to be like Zak Perrin." Obi-Wan said.

"Oh." Zak replied quietly.

"Listen; I'm going to leave you alone here to think about this. When you're ready, you come back up to the house; and if you need to, we'll talk a little more. But, Zak, I want you to know that I am far from being disappointed in you; alright?" Obi-Wan told him as he patted his back.

"Yes, Master." Zak answered so quietly that Obi-Wan could barely hear him.

Obi-Wan patted his leg before standing up, "don't be too long, Padawan." He said.

"No, Master." Zak answered.

"Good." Obi-Wan concluded, tousling Zak's hair before heading back to the house.

Zak felt stupid; Master Yoda's lessons about negative thoughts came back to him. If only he'd remembered them sooner, he would have known that Master Obi-Wan would never reject him. Luckily, he thought, he had a very understanding master.

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"Did he tell you?" Anakin asked as Obi-Wan came through the door.

"Yes." Obi-Wan answered, knowing there was no reason to explain anything to Anakin.

"He's like me in that way." Anakin said.

"What way?" Obi-Wan asked.

"Thinking in the negative. I can't count the number of times you tried to teach me not to do that." Anakin replied, smiling.

"Oh…yes. You did have a problem with that, didn't you." Obi-Wan recalled.

"He's alright now, though; he just feels foolish for not trusting you." Anakin told him.

"I know; that's why I left him to be by himself for a bit." Obi-Wan said.

"Is he feeling better?" Padme asked.

"Yes." They answered together.

"And what about you, Obi-Wan?" Padme asked.

"Couldn't be better." Obi-Wan said.

"I think you could do with some lunch." Anakin pointed out.

"Oh, well; I am a little hungry," Obi-Wan admitted, "but we should wait for Zak to come up, he won't be long."

A quarter of an hour later, Zak did indeed return to the house. By that time, Padme had prepared lunch and Boba had gathered up Gemma and the twins. Zak was quiet during the meal, but Anakin only sensed that he was still somewhat embarrassed for thinking what he had. In contrast, Boba talked almost constantly during the entire meal. Telling them all what he intended to do when they arrived on Coruscant.

"I've decided that the Chancellor needs me; I have a lot to offer you know." He spouted proudly and then went on to list all the talents he had to offer.

It seemed to do the trick for Zak, he and Boba were talking animatedly as they cleared the dishes from the table and carried them to the kitchen.

"That's better." Obi-Wan said when they had gone.

"Why does he think he has to be like me?" Anakin wondered.

"You know his thoughts, Anakin; don't you know?" Obi-Wan asked.

"Not all of it." Anakin answered.

"Because he thinks if I can't…connect with him the way I do with you; he isn't good enough." Obi-Wan explained.

"That's ridiculous; he's better in so many ways than I ever was." Anakin replied.

"Well, he's different than you; and I explained that to him. I think he understands now." Obi-Wan said. "Have you spoken with Master Yoda?"

"No, I've thought about it, and I think we should do it together. Maybe later this afternoon." Anakin suggested.

"Alright; if you'd feel better doing that, it's fine with me." Obi-Wan answered.