I didn't mean to wait so long to update but life likes to get in the way. Enjoy.
Coffee, he needed coffee, and lots of it.
He turned over in the small bed and realized how empty his trailer felt. There was no loving wife by his side, no faithful dog at the foot of the bed. And though he had lived there months in solitude, it had never felt quite this vacant.
He sat up with a jerk and examined the room. Her shoes still scattered across the bedroom floor, her hair products still overflowing from the bathroom, her clothes still falling out of the closet. She was still there; she had not left in the middle of the night.
He took a deep sigh and fell back on to the bed. He lay still, his eyes staring at the dull silver color of the trailer's ceiling. Every now and then it surprised him that this was the place he called home. It was dingy and dark. No room to decorate with few places for personal belongings.
It was a place where there was no room to form personal attachments. It was never meant to be a home, simply temporary arrangement until he sorted his life out.
He would be lying to himself if he didn't admit a part of him held on to the trailer to hurt her. To make her life slightly more difficult. He wanted her to feel out of place, bewildered, and maybe slightly alone. Like he had felt many months ago.
Though, being in the position he was in now, he had no right to make her feel that way. He wondered if she would forgive his childish antics. Maturity had never been once of his strong suits.
He sat up, slowly this time, to ease the pain of his pounding head.
He had come home to her but not before stopping for a few drinks. Maybe to drink away the night's events. Maybe try to sort out what a mess his life was. Maybe to decide what it was he wanted. Maybe realize what he needed. And maybe understand what the difference was.
He walked to the coffee maker and poured himself a cup. It was old but it was coffee. He took a long sip relaxing his head back. It was so quiet. And just like in the movies he felt a chill and knew something was wrong.
He dropped the cup and ran back to the bedroom. He tore apart the closet till he got to the bottom. Under his gym bag and copies of dated medical journals was a small shoe box. His hands shook slightly as he opened the box.
His wedding ring sat inside, a picture of Meredith, and a picture of Addison. A few tokens from family. A letter he had written on the drive to Seattle asking Addison why, a letter he never had the heart to mail. Maybe because he met Meredith the night he planned to send it. Some things he wanted to forget and some he wanted to keep hidden.
Derek's heart sank as the item in question was missing. He closed his eyes and leaned back against the bed.
The divorce papers Addison had handed him when she had first arrived in Seattle were gone.
This was going to be a long day.
I opened up the music box
I wish you would have changed the locks
To keep me from replaying
All the feelings I've been saving
…
carbon leaf
So what is Addison going to do with those divorce papers?