I still remember the smile when you tore me apart

.x.

Rating-K+

Genre-Angst/Romance

Author's Note-I woke up feeling a bit depressed this morning, and this was the result. Enjoy.

.x.

Artemis sighed. He was in the ballroom of his boarding school, Saint Bartleby's, if you could even call it a ballroom. The Chandelier wasn't even made of real diamonds, and there wasn't a speck of caviar in sight. He was at a school dance. And ashamed to admit it, even to himself. Especially to himself.

All the boys of Saint Bartleby's had been invited to bring their girlfriends with them. After all, it wouldn't be much of a dance without females. Of course, Artemis had no girlfriend, and therefore, no one to bring. Relationships like that were not really Artemis's thing.

Well... That wasn't entirely true. Artemis did have a female friend. His only friend above the surface, as a matter of fact. But he hadn't seen her in person for many years now, and most e-mail contact with her had ceased when Artemis realized that he loved her. He had theorized that by suspending contact with her, he might be able to flush the feeling out of his system. Artemis Fowl loves no one.

His theories had nearly always been correct, but this was one of the few instances where the boy genius was dead wrong. Artemis had only yearned to speak to her more by the day until he had almost begged Captain Short and Foaly to do a mind wipe, so he could get some peace and return to his scheming. But he knew the fairies wouldn't go for it. Besides, somehow he knew it was not the right thing to do.

Regardless... Artemis never would have been able to ask her... She didn't have feelings for him. He was sure of it.

He sighed again. Here, in this god-forsaken school, was the last place he wanted to be. Especially now. It had been his mother's idea, of course. Maybe if Artemis went to this event, he could get to know his classmates... Friendships might serve to distract him from his schemes. She had butler drop him off, in a desperate attempt to help Artemis in his transformation to decency. Pfft. Decency. What a waste of human intelligence.

He looked down at his perfectly manicured nails, and then to his solid gold watch. 8:23. Butler was coming to get him at ten. An hour and a half was much, much too long to wait. Artemis whipped out his cell phone, intending to quickly dial Butler's number, which had been committed to memory for 11 years now, when he slowed. No. Mother would not like it. She wanted him to stay for the whole evening. Artemis knew that he owed her that much.

Minutes passed, feeling like hours as he observed his peers. Several boys that he recognized were glued to their girlfriends in various spots around the room. Artemis didn't want to look at them any longer. His stomach was beginning to object. So he turned, searching for something other than his snogging classmates to look at.

He settled on the wide door that was the entrance to the ballroom, flanked by flickering torches that cast an eerie but somehow beautiful glow across the expensive carpet that covered the floor. Artemis watched the fire as it changed; growing, shrinking, evolving. It was fascinating.

"Two things a man never grows tired of watching, fire, and falling water. Always the same, yet always changing."

The quote came automatically to Artemis's mind as he watched the torch. Suddenly, his concentration on the flame broke as a new pair entered the room. The one on the right was Daniel. A boy he recognized from several of his classes. Artemis wasn't all that fond of him.

But the second... Was a girl, her blond hair up in a ponytail, and blue eyes sparkling in the firelight. Artemis's heart skipped several beats. He could not believe this. It was Tori. Barely recognizable, if not stunning in an aqua knee-length dress, but it was definitely her. He was almost convinced that his eyes were lying to him. She could not possibly be here, and yet... She was.

Tori and Daniel walked rather nervously into the ballroom together, looking as though they weren't really sure what to do. After a moment, they walked in Artemis's direction, and settled themselves a few feet away, sitting on two identical chairs. He watched them closely, eying Daniel with particular distaste. What an idiot. What Tori was doing with scum like him Artemis had no idea.

Tori was asking Daniel to dance with her, but her date kept shaking his head with an expression of honest apology on his face. Artemis, however grudgingly so, didn't blame him. Dancing was not his element either. It was then that Daniel rose from his chair, and walked from the room, promising Tori he'd be gone for only a moment.

She shifted in her seat, looking very uncomfortable. Unsure what to do now that she was alone. Suddenly, she turned. Artemis and Tori locked eyes for a moment, as the girl's mouth dropped open.

"Artemis?"

He nodded, numbly.

Tori lept from her seat and sprinted the few feet that separated her and her friend.

"ARTEMIS! WHAT HAPPENED?" Tori was on the brink of babbling with her excitement, "Why haven't you replied to any of my emails? I've been so worried! How are you? You go to school here? I'm so happy so see you!"

Artemis felt, for lack of a better word, completely overwhelmed. It is a very strange thing for a person to go from quietly watching someone, to being barraged with questions by the very same person in a matter of seconds. For the first time in his life, his brain was completely jammed. He had a million things to say, but could not bring himself to say any of them.

Conveniently, or not, at that very moment, Daniel strode back in through the door, and made directly for Artemis and Tori. Tori seemed to forget about Artemis and her questions immediately as she looked up at her escort.

"Will one of you dance with me?" She demanded, blue eyes sharp, glaring at both Artemis and Daniel in turn.

Artemis sighed and looked down and his Italian loafers. Then he slowly shook his head. Daniel looked at the ceiling, as though praying for patience. But it seems as though he found none.

"Fine." He answered in a resigned voice, and, sighing, he allowed himself to be dragged out onto the dance floor by his date, who wore an expression of happy satisfaction.

Artemis wasn't really sure what to think or how to feel. Then the music started, and the pair began to dance. Artemis's mouth went dry, and his grip around his wrist tightened; his fingernails biting into his skin like the the teeth of some ferocious animal. He watched the pair as they revolved slowly, Tori's eyes sparkling in the dim light, her dress was a smooth waterfall of silk, billowing gently around her legs as she moved.

It seemed to take an eternity for the song to end, and for the two to part. Tori ran off to one of her girl-friends, who was beaming.

Artemis was still numb. Lifting his hand from his pale wrist, he was surprised to see that there were small, bleeding cuts there, left by the death grip. He was even more surprised to find that he made no attempt to stop the bleeding. He welcomed the pain, it distracted him from what he had just seen and felt.

He stood up, took one last look at the Ballroom and the girl, then turned and walked out, going straight for the exit from the school, meaning to go wait for butler to arrive and take him home. Away from this wretched place and the chiaroscuro of emotion whirling about his head.

"Hey, Artemis!"

He turned to see an elated Tori sprinting towards him yet again.

"...Yes?"

"Good seeing you." She said, simply. Then she smiled, and walked away.

And I still remember the smile when you tore me apart.

Fin