Well, this has been a long time coming. I've been working on this fic for months now. What was going to be a short story has now turned into a three-part series. The first part is completed (75k+ words), so it will have regular updates. It's 9 chapters long.
I hope you enjoy it, and honestly, I'll be happy if even just a few people read this. It's been stuck in my head for so long that I just had to write it for my own curiosity about where it would take me. And hoo boi! We've gone places, haha.
Anyway, thanks for clicking. Happy reading! x
Chapter 1
It had started with a look.
That was all it took.
A simple look, and he had been captured. Drawn to a being he barely knew.
The boy had arrived at Lotus Pier unceremoniously, dressed in a long white robe and looking out of place. He had been alone, quiet. His eyes were cold and distant as he looked out over the great lake.
The friendly residents of Lotus Pier had avoided him, skirting a vast distance around him and whispering among themselves. He looked as though he'd stepped out of time, an ancient God that had fallen to Earth.
Wei Wuxian had kept to the shadows under the pier; he wasn't supposed to have been there. But he couldn't take his eyes off the beautiful stranger. He tried to pull himself away, to leave the village before he was caught. But he wanted one more look, just one last chance to look at the boy's face in the sunlight.
He wondered if he'd moved too far out from under their pier, or maybe he hadn't been as quiet as he thought. Whatever it was drew the boy's eyes down, and all of a sudden, they were staring right at each other.
Time stopped.
The boy's eyes shone bright yellow under the glimmering sunlight. His lips parted in surprise and the tips of his ears turned pink. Wei Wuxian opened his mouth to say something, to make some kind of connection with the boy but nothing happened. He just stared.
It was a look that would change his life. A look that made him believe he was in love. A look that had led to a life he did not want.
Sometimes, Wei Wuxian wondered what would have happened had he not shared a look with the beautiful boy on the pier. He imagined what life would have been like if he had been free to choose his future, a life where he was free from the anger he'd felt since that summer.
A life where Lan Wangji did not exist.
A life where Lan Wangji had not betrayed him.
Four years later…
The clock ticked away slowly. It seemed to have been stuck on 15.56 for at least ten minutes. Wei Wuxian tapped his pen on the table in time with the second hand. He could sense the other people around him furiously checking through their papers, re-reading their answers and making last-minute changes. Wei Wuxian dropped his pen and lifted his arms above his head as he yawned and stretched. The grey-haired woman at the front of the hall gave him a narrow-eyed stare, and Wei Wuxian rolled his eyes as he slouched back down against his desk.
His final day of university had come around quickly; he was sitting through the final exam he would ever have to take. He couldn't wait to hand in his paper and leave through the doors that had been tempting him since he sat down over 90 minutes ago.
He looked back up at the clock. 15.58. He firmly believed the time was mocking him.
When the grey-haired woman finally stood up and announced pens down, Wei Wuxian let out a sigh of relief. He handed his paper to the man who came to his desk to collect it didn't bother to pack away his stationery before grabbing his bag. He made a hasty retreat, barely stopping to say goodbye to his classmates.
As soon as he was away from the exam hall, Wei Wuxian dug through his bag and pulled out his phone. He took a deep breath and waited impatiently for it to turn on.
1 new voicemail.
The notification flashed on his screen, and he felt his heart stop. As he stared at the screen, he couldn't help but think about his future.
Wei Wuxian swallowed his nerves and hit voicemail. He slowly lifted the phone to his ear and waited. Then, he listened to the voicemail twice more, just to make sure he'd heard it right.
We're delighted to offer you the job.
He sat down on the nearest bench and stared at his phone, still not believing he'd done it.
"Wei Wuxian!"
The familiar, grumpy voice wasn't enough to stop the blissful feeling bubbling up through his chest.
"We've been standing outside the exam hall like idiots!"
"He's a free man now; let him bask in the glory of it."
Wei Wuxian looked up at his two best friends walking toward him. Jiang Cheng wore his usual scowl; his hair looked spiky as though he took out his frustration on it. Nie Huaisang was as immaculate as always. His perfectly pressed suit looked brand new, and Wei Wuxian remembered he'd had his first day in the office.
"Your first day!" Wei Wuxian stood up and joined his friends. "How was it?"
"Perfect," Nie Huaisang smirked. "They think I'm just some meek little intern, so they left me alone long enough for me to read up on all their current cases. I'm way ahead of everyone else."
"Your gege pulled a shit tone of strings to get you that internship; you should work harder," Jiang Cheng chastised.
"I'm just biding my time," Nie Huaisang said. "All the other interns are fighting each other tooth and nail to get a step up. No one is paying attention to me. Everything is exactly as it should be."
"You're so fucking sneaky," Jiang Cheng shook his head.
"It's why we're friends," Nie Huaisang teased.
"Are we going or not?" Jiang Cheng pushed Nie Huaisang away before he could wrap an arm around his shoulder.
"I need to make a quick call," Wei Wuxian said. "I'll meet you over there."
"No way!" Jiang Cheng grabbed his arm and pulled him along the path. "We back to campus to get you, so you're coming with us."
"I need to do it now," Wei Wuxian laughed as he pulled his arm away. Jiang Cheng made to grab him again, but Wei Wuxian was too fast for him and grabbed him in a headlock.
"You asked for it," Nie Huaisang laughed.
"You asshole!" Jiang Cheng pulled at his arms. "Get off me!"
"You going to let me make my call?" Wei Wuxian asked.
"Fine!" Jiang Cheng snapped, and Wei Wuxian let him go. "What so important anyway?"
"The agency just offered me the job," Wei Wuxian beamed.
"Oh my god!" Nie Huaisang clapped his hands.
"Why the hell didn't you just say that?" Jiang Cheng punched him in the arm.
Wei Wuxian winced and rubbed the painful spot. "You didn't give me a chance."
"Make the call," Nie Huaisang waved off whatever Jiang Cheng had been about to say. "Do it now; we'll wait for you."
Wei Wuxian took a deep breath and called the number they had left on the voicemail. The woman on the other end had been in his interview; she was delighted he accepted the role.
"This calls for a celebration," Nie Huaisang grinned.
"Can we at least eat first?" Jiang Cheng glared.
"We can do whatever you want," Wei Wuxian wrapped his arm around Jiang Cheng's shoulders and led them down the path. "It's my treat seeing as though you're unemployed and Huaisang is an unpaid intern."
"He's a lawyer; he will have more money than we can dream of," Jiang Cheng said.
"And when he's earning, he can buy us food," Wei Wuxian smiled over at Nie Huaisang.
"I hope it's better than 7Eleven ramen," Jiang Cheng grumbled.
"Beggars can't be choosers," Wei Wuxian informed him, and Jiang Cheng pushed him away angrily.
"Who you calling a beggar?!"
"Boys, boys!" Nie Huaisang stopped them and looked down at his phone. "Give me a second."
"Now what?!" Jiang Cheng threw his arms in the arm.
"Everything ok?" Wei Wuxian asked, noticing the worry on Nie Huaisang's face.
"When was the last time you called home?" he asked.
"He never calls home," Jiang Cheng muttered.
"Lan Xichen called a couple of weeks ago… maybe," Wei Wuxian shrugged; he had a terrible memory. "Why?"
"You didn't say Lan Jianfeng was sick," Nie Huaisang held up his phone, showing him the message from his brother.
"He's been ill awhile," Wei Wuxian said. "I assumed you guys knew."
"What's wrong with him?" Jiang Cheng asked, his anger long forgotten.
"He won't eat, and he's weak," Wei Wuxian told them. "I don't know anything more than that." Jiang Cheng and Nie Huaisang stared at him, their faces a mix of annoyance and horror.
"You don't know any more than that?" Jiang Cheng asked. "What is wrong with you?"
"Xichen doesn't know any more than that," Wei Wuxian said defensively. "He said he'd tell me if things got worse, but he always says he's just the same."
"Why haven't you been home?" Nie Huaisang asked.
"I've been busy," Wei Wuxian frowned. "I've been studying, and then I had the interview. So there's been a lot going on."
"You should have gone home," Jiang Cheng huffed.
"I can go home before starting my job," Wei Wuxian said. "It'll be fine."
"What do Nie Mingjue say?" Jiang Cheng asked Nie Huaisang.
"Just that he can't come into town tonight," Nie Huaisang checked through the messages. "He's going to help Lan Xichen with a few things."
"If he's going there to help—"
"Xichen would have called if there was anything to worry about," Wei Wuxian interrupted and smiled at them. "I'm starving; let's go eat."
Wei Wuxian walked ahead; he could hear Nie Huaisang and Jiang Cheng whispering behind him. In the three years he had been at university, Wei Wuxian had not been home. All of his friends he had known from back home had all been confused about his decision, but after the first year, they had given up trying to persuade him to visit.
When Lan Xichen had called to say Lan Jianfeng was ill, he contemplated going home to see him. Lan Jianfeng was a strong man; he'd thought at the time he'd be back on his feet in a week or so. However, three months later, Lan Jianfeng had not improved. And so, Wei Wuxian had delayed going home. Not because he didn't want to, but because he would have to face the possibility that Lan Jianfeng might never be well again.
Lunch had been full of chatter and jokes, the three of them riding the high of finishing university with a sparkling future of possibilities ahead of them. It had been easy to put thoughts of home behind him, ignore what was happening and instead listen to Nie Huaisang talking about the other interns he was up against. Jiang Cheng had decided to take a break before heading home to learn the family business. Still, Wei Wuxian had a feeling he was putting off going home to a family that was falling apart at the seams.
They'd said goodbye when Nie Huaisang had to return to work, and Wei Wuxian promised to meet them for drinks that evening.
"Let's get shit faced!" Jiang Cheng had said after he emptied his bowl of ramen.
Wei Wuxian was looking forward to it.
Their local bar was an out of the way gem. It was nothing special, their shoes stuck to the floor, and the upholstery was frayed, but the alcohol was cheap, and the staff knew their names. It was home, in some ways. A friendly place that would give you a drink on the house if it was your birthday. Wei Wuxian had lost count of the times he'd fallen asleep in a booth and had been woken up by the staff who had called a taxi to take him home. They'd seen him at his best and worst, and they never judged him or his friends for it.
Wei Wuxian arrived late, and he knew Jiang Cheng would be angry. He had some papers to fill in at the university, and he'd needed to head to the library to return the last of his books he'd taken out for exam prep.
Wei Wuxian struggled through the crowded dancefloor to their usual table. Jiang Cheng, Nie Huaisang and Wen Qing were already a few drinks in.
"Where the hell have you been?" Jiang Cheng asked as soon as he spotted him.
"I had some stuff to do," Wei Wuxian kissed Wen Qing on the cheek.
"He's been an ass all night," she glared at Jiang Cheng. "You have no idea how many times he's told me he's spent all day waiting around for you."
"Jiang Cheng," Wei Wuxian grabbed Jiang Cheng's cheeks and squished them. "Did ickle A-Cheng miss his gege?"
Jiang Cheng batted his hands away. "Get lost," he sulked.
"I'll get a round in," Wei Wuxian announced.
"We have a tab, my gege's apology for being able to join us," Nie Huaisang said. "Sit down." He grabbed and filled a glass with wine before passing it over to Wei Wuxian.
"Where is Mianmian?" Wei Wuxian asked.
"On her way," Jiang Cheng said. "She's just finishing work."
"Poor Mianmian," Wei Wuxian pouted. "One more year to go, and she won't have us to hang out with."
"Lucky Mianmian," Jiang Cheng muttered, and Wen Qing pinched his thigh.
"All of us are staying in the city," Nie Huaisang laughed. "It's not like we'll never see her again."
"But who will she sit with at lunch?" Wei Wuxian asked.
"Mianmian has other friends," Nie Huaisang said. "She's far more sociable than any of us."
"Speak for yourself," Wen Qing smirked.
"Fine, she's far more sociable than Wei Wuxian," Nie Huaisang dodged just in time to avoid Wei Wuxian's hand.
"Don't forget A-Ning will be starting next year too," Wen Qing said. "They'll have each other for company, and I've already asked her to keep an eye on him while he gets settled in."
"Wen Ning is an adult; he doesn't need supervision," Jiang Cheng frowned at Wen Qing.
"I'm his jiejie; I worry about him," she gave Jiang Cheng a long, hard look. "Do you honestly think your jiejie let you come away to university before asking me to keep an out for you?"
"She did not!" Jiang Cheng looked horrified.
"Of course she did," Wen Qing laughed. "She asked me to keep an eye on Wei Wuxian too."
"Not me?" Nie Huaisang pouted.
"She knows you would have been keeping an eye on all of us," Wei Wuxian nudged his friend with his shoulder.
"That's true," Nie Huaisang laughed. "I had stringent orders from..."
As soon as Nie Huaisang cut himself off, Wei Wuxian felt his stomach squirm uncomfortably. He didn't need to ask who gave him strict orders; he could tell from the way everyone's eyes shifted away from each other. A sharp pang cut through his heart, deep and painful. It was a familiar feeling, he'd grown used to it over the years, but it still hurt.
"There's Mianmian," Jiang Cheng waved his arm, and everyone looked up, grateful for her arrival.
"I'm so sorry I'm late," Mianmian was out of breath. "I practically ran here."
"You didn't need to do that," Wei Wuxian said as he pulled up a chair for her while Nie Huaisang helped her out of the coat.
"I didn't want to keep you guys waiting," she smiled sweetly.
"More like she didn't want to get here too late and miss out on any gossip," Nie Huaisang smirked as he pushed a beer toward her.
"You're the one who can't go 10 minutes without gossip!" She poked at Nie Huaisang.
"You wound me!" Nie Huaisang grasped his hand over his heart. "Wei Wuxian, please reason with her. You know you're the only one she listens to."
Mianmian had become something of a little sister to Wei Wuxian. She had arrived at the university three weeks after the rest of her year had started. She had been meek, quiet. Wei Wuxian had met her in the canteen; she had been sitting alone, keeping as far away from her classmates as possible. He'd known she was one of them as soon as he met her eyes.
She'd come out of her shell in the last two years. She'd become more confident, more sociable and Wei Wuxian was proud that she was flourishing in this new life. They quickly bonded over their desire for a fresh start, to carve their own paths and make a future for themselves.
"Leave her alone," Wei Wuxian smirked behind his beer.
"I knew you'd take her side," Nie Huaisang playfully narrowed his eyes.
Another round of beer was brought to the table, and they toasted to Nie Mingjue, his apology going down smoothly. The club had got even busier, it was full of students who had finished their exams. Wei Wuxian had been left with Wen Qing and Jiang Cheng; they were arguing over something or other. He hadn't been paying much attention.
Wei Wuxian looked over at Nie Huaisang and Mianmian. Their heads were bowed together as they talked excitedly.
"I just can't imagine it," Nie Huaisang said.
"Oh, I don't know," Mianmian smiled. "I think it would be kind of cute."
"But... I just can't imagine it," Nie Huaisang repeated. "He's so frigid."
"He's a big softie, really," Mianmian smirked.
"How do you know?" Nie Huaisang laughed.
"I've seen it."
"It's still weird," Nie Huaisang shook his head. "Having a soft side is entirely different from suddenly having a child."
"Who had a kid?" Wei Wuxian's interest was suddenly peaked. Nie Huaisang and Mianmian looked up at him, their eyes widening slightly.
"No one," Mianmian said quickly.
"Just a friend," Nie Huaisang at nearly the same time.
Wei Wuxian watched them share an awkward look between them. "Now I'm even more intrigued."
"It's nothing," Mianmian smiled.
"You don't know him," Nie Huaisang took a long swig of his beer.
"Why are you being weird?" Wei Wuxian narrowed his eyes at them.
"They're talking about Lan Wangji," Wen Qing cut in. Wei Wuxian's stomach twisted into knots. Nie Huaisang had stopped himself from saying his name earlier, and Wei Wuxian had been grateful for it. But, hearing it from Wen Qing, so straightforward and clear… it cut him deeply.
Lan Wangji.
Lan Zhan.
Wei Wuxian felt his heart clench; it ached just thinking about him. It had been three years since he'd seen him, three years since he told him to back off. He'd been so desperate to start over, to create a new life for himself at university that he'd banned everyone from talking about him, even Lan Xichen. He had been selfish, childish, and as time went on, it became harder and harder to talk about him.
He missed him.
"Wen Qing!" Nie Huaisang glared at her.
"He wasn't going to let that go," she said. "You shouldn't have spoken about it if you didn't want him to hear."
"Wait," Wei Wuxian stopped Nie Huaisang from replying. "Lan Zhan has a kid?" All four of his friends glanced at one another. "You all knew, and none of you said anything?"
"You're surprised by that?" Jiang Cheng asked. "You bite our heads off if we so much as mention his name."
"Yes, but..." Wei Wuxian felt something shift in his chest; his heart ached.
"We thought Lan Xichen might have mentioned it," Wen Qing admitted. "But then when you didn't say anything, we didn't want to tell you in case you got angry."
Wei Wuxian closed his eyes and let out a sigh. He couldn't blame them. It was his fault they were afraid to mention it to him.
"You never like to talk about him," Nie Huaisang said.
"He has a kid?" Wei Wuxian asked, but his friends all avoided his eyes. "I want to know; you can talk about him."
"He has a little boy," Wen Qing hesitated. "He's two."
"Wait, what?!" Wei Wuxian stared at them. The air left his lungs; there was a new pain in his chest. It was deeper, cold. "He has a two-year-old?" He was met with silence. "How long have you all known?"
"A few months now," Nie Huaisang admitted. "They didn't tell anyone until he was 18 months."
"Why?" Wei Wuxian asked.
"You know them better than anyone," Mianmian said. "The Lan's still really like their traditions. They keep births secret to protect the children from anyone who wants to harm the family."
"But… is he..." Wei Wuxian couldn't find the words. His mind conjured images of the little boy; he wondered if he had Lan Zhan's eyes, his nose. He wondered if he was quiet and gentle like Lan Zhan, if he smiled like him or if he had his mother's smile. The ache in his chest felt worse, heavier at the thought of Lan Zhan moving on without him.
"Are you ok?" Wen Qing touched his back.
"Fine," Wei Wuxian brushed off her concern. "Why wouldn't I be? He's got a kid; that's good. He's happy, he's moved on..." he felt the sudden urge to cry.
"I saw him at the cafe," Mianmian said. "He had his son with him."
"He was here?" Wei Wuxian asked. "When?"
"About a month ago," Mianmian said sheepishly. "He said he was here for business."
"Business?" Wei Wuxian asked.
"He didn't say what," Mianmian said. "And I didn't want to pry... he asked after you, though." Wei Wuxian touched his stomach as he tried to ignore the feeling of guilt swirling through his gut. Lan Wangji had been in the city…
"You really haven't talked to him for three years?" Nie Huaisang asked.
"No."
"Why?" Wen Qing asked. "You've never said what happened between you two."
"Nothing happened," Wei Wuxian lied. "We just decided to go our separate ways."
"Bullshit!" Jiang Cheng spoke for the first time since they had started talking about Lan Wangji. "You guys were inseparable one minute, and then all of a sudden, we weren't allowed to mention him."
"Did you fall out?" Wen Qing asked.
"No," Wei Wuxian said. "We just... I don't know. We grew apart."
"You should have gone home," Jiang Cheng snapped. "After everything they've done for you, you should have gone home to see them."
"I'll forever be indebted to the Lan's; you don't need to remind me," Wei Wuxian snapped back. "But I wouldn't need to be if it hadn't been for Lan Zhan in the first place!"
"You can't keep blaming him!" Jiang Cheng argued.
"It's his fault!"
"Stop it!" Nie Huaisang stopped them from arguing further. "Look, whatever is between Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji is their business."
"We shouldn't have been talking about this here," Mianmian quickly added. "I'm sorry…"
"Don't apologise to him; he's being an idiot," Jiang Cheng snapped, and Mianmian shrank back into her chair.
"And that's in his right," Nie Huaisang said quickly before Jiang Cheng could say anything else. "If he doesn't want to forgive Lan Wangji for what he did, then that's his decision."
"Whether you agree with it or not," Wen Qing added when Jiang Cheng opened his mouth to say something else.
The atmosphere was tense, and Wei Wuxian watched Jiang Cheng sulk. His other friends quietly made conversation, trying to pull them both into different topics. But Wei Wuxian hadn't been ready to let it drop; there was more he wanted to say.
"Can you guys give us a minute?" Wei Wuxian said all of a sudden. Mianmian glanced nervously at Nie Huaisang and Wen Qing, waiting for their lead. "We just need to talk a bit."
"I need to pee anyway," Wen Qing said, and Mianmian followed her. Nie Huaisang gave a huff and announced he would order more drinks.
"One day, you're going to look back on this and know I was right," Jiang Cheng said.
Wei Wuxian narrowed his eyes at his best friend. "Of all the people here, I thought you understood the most. You were the first person I called, the first person I told after… he did this to me…" he petered off, at a loss of what to say
"Even at your angriest, you were still only happy when he was around," Jiang Cheng said. "You don't throw something like that away!"
"I wouldn't have if he-" Wei Wuxian stopped himself. He took a deep breath, trying to keep his anger under control. Losing his temper and arguing with Jiang Cheng wasn't the way to solve disagreements. He'd learned that the hard way when they were kids. "I wouldn't have if he hadn't bitten me," he said once he felt calm enough.
"You can't keep holding onto this," Jiang Cheng seethed. "Look at me, look at what holding onto anger can do!"
"A-Cheng…"
"Don't call me that!" Jiang Cheng slammed his fist down on the table. "There's always been a thing between you, and yet you're denying yourself the chance to see what that is because you're so angry all the time. It's getting in the way of what you want! You haven't been home in years; you haven't even been home to check on Lan Jianfeng! Why? Because you're still bitter about something Lan Wangji did seven years ago?! Get over it!"
"Don't tell me how to feel," Wei Wuxian felt it first in his chest, the urge to dismiss everything Jiang Cheng said just because he told him to get over it. "He turned me into this and ruined my life, so you don't get to sit there and tell me how I should be feeling!"
"He ruined it?" Jiang Cheng scoffed. "He gave you a family, a home, a place to belong. His fuqin paid for you to go to university, and there's no way you would have been able to do that if it wasn't for him! You wouldn't have any of this if it weren't for Lan Wangji. You wouldn't have met Nie Huaisang or the girls, nothing! You have more now than the pathetic life you had before you met him."
"Fuck you, Jiang Cheng," Wei Wuxian glared at him.
"No, fuck you!" Jiang Cheng bit back. "Have you ever asked him why he did it? Have you ever talked to him about it?"
Wei Wuxian stayed silent, allowing Jiang Cheng to interpret that as he wished. The truth was that he hadn't ever asked; they had never talked about it, but Wei Wuxian believed he knew why already.
"I'm not stupid," Wei Wuxian said. "I know Lan Jianfeng was going to banish me and biting me was the only way he could keep me in the family."
"So, in other words, you haven't talked to him. Of course, you haven't," Jiang Cheng let out a frustrated groan. "You don't even know what you're running away from. You're a mess-"
"You can talk!"
"I know I'm a mess!" Jiang Cheng growled. "My parents fucked me up, but at least I know I'm fucked! You're in so much denial you're making yourself miserable."
"Why are you doing this?" Wei Wuxian asked; his eyes stung, and there was a lump in his throat.
"Because you're my best friend," Jiang Cheng said. "And because you did it for me."
Wei Wuxian paused and stared at his oldest friend. They'd been through a lot together. Jiang Cheng had run away from home the day Wei Wuxian had tripped over him on the temple's steps. He'd spilt the bucket of water he'd carried up from the well to clean the sacred statues; his arms ached from the weight. But Jiang Cheng had looked up at him, tears in his eyes and a snotty nose. His parents had argued again, had fought over his future. At nine years old, they had been there for each other. He had walked Jiang Cheng home, and two days later, Jiang Cheng had returned to the temple and helped him carry the water.
They became fast friends, best friends. They played in the woods in secret; they talked about their lives, Jiang Cheng's dysfunctional family and Wei Wuxian's life in the orphanage. They had never judged each other; they had accepted everything. Not even when Jiang Cheng had turned up at Wei Wuxian's dorm room at 3am, drunk out of his ass and his knuckles bleeding, tears streaming down his face. Wei Wuxian had pulled him inside, had cleaned him up and talked to him. Gave it to him straight. He needed help.
"You need to let go of that anger," Jiang Cheng said softly.
"I can't forgive him for what he did."
"I didn't say to forgive him," Jiang Cheng said. "Maybe you'll never forgive him; maybe he doesn't even expect you to. Maybe you guys will never be more than pack brothers, but… don't let the anger get in the way of what could be."
Wei Wuxian turned his beer bottle in his hand, his eyes staring at the watermarks it left on the table. "When did you get so smart?" he asked as he lifted his eyes and smirked.
"Fuck off," Jiang Cheng smirked. "My therapist has said a lot of the same things to me. Doesn't make it any less right, though."
"You're a good friend," Wei Wuxian wrapped his arm around Jiang Cheng's shoulders.
"Yeah, well, remember that the next time you pop off at me."
"Oh hey, they're side hugging," Wen Qing walked back to the table, Nie Huaisang and Mianmian behind her. "Everything ok now?"
"We're not hugging," Jiang Cheng snapped and shoved Wei Wuxian away.
"Don't piss him off," Nie Huaisang laughed.
"We all good here?" Mianmian asked.
"Yeah," Wei Wuxian nodded. "Sorry…"
"No need," Mianmian smiled sheepishly. "It's our fault… we shouldn't have-"
"Let's just forget it, ok?" Nie Huaisang patted Mianmian on the back and gave her a reassuring smile.
Wei Wuxian tried to get out of his mood. He wanted to let it go, push it from his mind and enjoy his night out with his friends. But he couldn't. He couldn't stop thinking about Lan Wangji, about the child he had fathered… about the person he had had a child with. He wondered what she was like; was she one of them? Perhaps another Lan that could provide him with perfect Lan children? Wei Wuxian picked at the label on his beer, tearing off little bits at a time as he thought about the mystery woman Lan Wangji had settled down with.
He hadn't expected Lan Wangji to wait for him when he'd left Lan Estate. They hadn't really been anything before he left, nothing more than friends who had shared the occasional kiss when they felt like it. But whether he wanted to admit it or not, there had always been something between them. Something that had simmered under the surface even when they had first met; it was hot and heavy even when they were teenagers. A slow-burning fire that had taken Wei Wuxian by surprise as he slowly started to see past Lan Wangji's cold stare. But it had all changed; everything had gone the moment Lan Wangji had betrayed him. The warmth was still there, but it was hazy; it was hard to feel underneath his anger.
Wei Wuxian knew hadn't left Lan Wangji on a good note. He'd said things he shouldn't have, but he didn't think he'd find someone else. He frowned at the thought and asked himself if he'd wanted him to wait. For a moment, he wondered if he'd have eventually gone home to explore what could have been between them. But he knew the answer; he knew he wouldn't have. He thought over what Jiang Cheng had said, but none of it mattered; he was too late.
Lan Wangji had moved on.
"Let's dance," Wen Qing grabbed his arm, drawing him from his thoughts as she pulled him out of his seat. "Come on, Mianmian."
"I don't feel like dancing," Wei Wuxian moaned as he followed the girls to the dance floor.
"Don't care," Wen Qing replied. "Just dance it out."
Wei Wuxian rolled his eyes. Dance it out. It was Wen Qing and Mian Milan's answer to everything. Stressed? Dance it out. Bad break up? Dance it out. Feeling sad that the guy you kinda like has moved on and started a family?
"Just dance it out," Wen Qing held both of his hands and tried to get him to join her as she started swaying to the music.
"You love this song," Mianmian said as she held her arms in the arm, her hips swaying to the beat. "Stop thinking and just dance."
Wei Wuxian closed his eyes and let out a breath. He listened to the music, allowed the tune to sweep away his heavy thoughts. As he began to move, he felt the tension in his body ease, felt the sickly feeling in his stomach fade. He opened his eyes to see his friends smiling at him.
He returned the smile, and Wen Qing dropped his hands and started to dance too. It was infectious. The dancing, the happy feeling it gave him. As Mianmian and Wen Qing sang along to the song, Wei Wuxian joined them, singing as loud as possible. The last of the tension left his body, but his heart still felt like a heavy burden in his chest. But it wasn't as bad as it had been.
They danced as hard as the music beat, sang so loud their throats burned. With every new song, Wei Wuxian started to feel better and better.
"I need a drink," Mianmian said after a particularly fast song had finished.
"I can't breathe," Wen Qing bent over at the waist, her hands propping herself upon his knees.
"I have a stitch," Wei Wuxian held his side.
"We're so unfit!" Wen Qing laughed.
"Let's go back to the table," Mianmian led them across the bustling dance crowd and back to the table.
Wei Wuxian sat back in his chair as he tried to catch his breath.
"So, what now?" Mianmian asked. "We've drank ourselves silly, we've danced until we can't breathe, so now what?"
"Food?" Wei Wuxian gulped down the last of his beer.
"Let's go for a run," Jiang Cheng's said, lighting up.
"Now?" Wei Wuxian winced at the stitch in his side.
"Why not?" Jiang Cheng shrugged.
"It's 2am; got somewhere to be?" Nie Huaisang smirked.
"Fine," Wei Wuxian laughed. "Let's go."
Mianmian whooped loudly and grabbed her jacket. "Let's go!"
"Where to?"
"Let's go to the reservoir," Wen Qing suggested.
Wei Wuxian groaned, his body ached, and he felt like he could fall asleep at any second. "This is going to be a long one, isn't it?"
"Get up; you'll be fine once you get outside," Wen Qing pushed him off his chair.
"So cruel," Wei Wuxian said as he pulled his jacket on.
They walked to the reservoir and snuck through a concealed hole in the fence. Wei Wuxian followed his friends, his hands stuffed deep into his pockets to stave off the chill in the air.
Mianmian walked beside him, the others a few feet ahead. She was quiet at first, but he could tell she had something on her mind.
"What's wrong?" he asked.
"Nothing," Mianmian said a little too quickly.
"Want to try that again?" Wei Wuxian offered her a small smile.
"It's just summer," Mianmian shrugged. "I don't know where I'm going to go."
"I thought you were going to head over to Lanling?"
"I don't have accommodation," she said. "My applications have been denied."
"Can't you apply to stay here?"
"I've tried," she said. "But you know the rules; once uni is out, I've got to move on."
"It's not fair," Wei Wuxian shook his head.
"No, it's not," Mianmian sighed. "I've got a few more options but not many. If they don't work out, I'll just have to travel for a bit."
"Where are your parents?"
"Off the grid," there was a worried look in her eyes. "I haven't heard from them in a while."
"You didn't say," Wei Wuxian frowned. Mianmian had always been close to her parents; it was unusual that they hadn't been in touch.
"I kept hoping they'd get in touch," she said.
"Have you told Nie Huaisang?"
"Not yet."
"You should," Wei Wuxian encouraged. "He can ask Nie Mingjue for you. They were last in Qinghe, weren't they?"
"They could have moved on," she said. "But I will, I'll ask. Thanks."
"Would you like me to speak to Lan Jianfeng about finding somewhere to stay?" he asked.
"No," she quickly shook her head. "Lan Jianfeng has stuck his neck out for me before, and I wouldn't want to bother him while he's ill."
"I can ask Lan Xichen," Wei Wuxian offered.
"He's got more than enough to worry about," she said. "Don't worry, I'll be fine."
"I'm always here for you, you know?" Wei Wuxian nudged her shoulder. "If you ever need anything, please tell me."
"I will," she smiled back.
"Would you two hurry up?" Jiang Cheng's voice called to them from up ahead.
"What's the rush?" Wei Wuxian shouted back, sharing a smirk with Mianmian as they both walked a little faster.
"There's a good spot to change," Wen Qing pointed toward the edge of the forest where there was a small maintenance hut.
"You sure there's no cameras?" Jiang Cheng asked.
"I've used it before," Wen Qing said. "Never had any issues so far."
They ducked around the back of the hut and started to undress. Wei Wuxian and Nie Huaisang teased Jiang Cheng, who had put on some muscle since they last ran together.
"Look how pert his butt is," Wei Wuxian grinned.
"Fuck off," Jiang Cheng turned around and glared at them.
"It's a lovely butt," Wen Qing walked past him and patted him gently on the ass.
Jiang Cheng stared after Wen Qing, and Wei Wuxian knew, had it been daytime, they would have seen a blush on his cheeks.
"You... you like my ass?" Jiang Cheng blinked at her.
Wen Qing tucked her clothes under a bush where she had already hidden her bag and turned to look at him. "Who wouldn't?" she winked at him, and Jiang Cheng stared at her.
"Get a room," Nie Huaisang scoffed.
"I'm going to hurt you-"
"Oh, A-Chang, not in front of so many people," he said in a flirty tone that made Jiang Cheng scowl.
Wei Wuxian laughed, a warm feeling in his chest as he watched his best friend staring after Wen Qing. They'd been dancing around each other all through university, and it was high time Jiang Cheng finally told her how he felt about her
"When do you think he'll pluck up the courage to tell her?" Mianmian whispered.
"I think they'll never get together if it's left to him," Wei Wuxian whispered back, making Mianmian laugh.
"What are you saying?" Jiang Cheng snapped.
"Nothing," Wei Wuxian smirked. He bundled up his clothes and stuffed them under a log, tucking them away out of sight. He grabbed a shoe and tucked his phone inside, but he saw the screen light up before he hid it. There was a notification to tell him he had missed a call four hours ago. He unlocked his phone and looked at the number; Lan Xichen.
"You coming?" Nie Huaisang called to him as he headed into the forest.
"Yeah," Wei Wuxian turned off his phone, tucked it into his shoe and hid it. He made a mental note to call him back in the morning and ran after his friends.
"See you on the other side," Wen Qing grinned.
Wei Wuxian knelt down on the ground and took a deep breath. He always felt the first shift in his back, the cracking of his spine as it prepared to change shape. He gritted his teeth and tried to breathe through the pain. He watched his friends shift in front of him; their changes were always much more manageable, faster. They'd had more practice, made more effort to change often to keep their bodies supple. He closed his eyes and focused on his breathing as he felt his skin tingle, the hair on his body growing longer, thicker. His sense of smell grew more robust, his canine teeth grew longer. He groaned as his arms buckled, his fingers cracked and shortened. He opened his eyes when he felt something brush against his side; the world was yellow, his eyes had sharpened. He could sense his friends around him, smell their familiar scents. He focused on the sound of their soft, comforting whimpers while he waited for the rest of this body to catch up. For his change to finally end.
He laid on the floor for a while, panting. Changes were still exhausting for him. Jiang Cheng licked his muzzle and playfully nipped his ear, drawing him out of it. Finally, Wei Wuxian got to his feet and stretched. He shook out his fur and greeted his friends as they wagged their tails and playfully darted around him, waiting for him to be fully ready.
Wei Wuxian lifted his muzzle and took a deep breath. His body started to feel more alive, as though it had become more robust and invigorated. Beside him, Nie Huaisang lifted his head and let out a deep, jubilant howl. Three more enthusiastic howls quickly followed it, and Wei Wuxian felt a rumble in his chest as his body instinctively began to join them in the song. Jiang Cheng was the first to run, and Wei Wuxian gave in to his instincts, allowing the wolf to take over his mind as he chased after his friend.
Thank you so much for reading! I hope you enjoyed it and that you're looking forward to seeing what comes next. I'd love to hear your thoughts, so please do leave a comment if you have time.