I sat on my bed massaging my abdomen as I pondered over the previous events, while trapped in my iron chamber. As always, I had lost control. Losing was my greatest enemy, so it was no wonder I had resorted to my primitive instinct of destroying the one who could've caused me to fail.

Right now, I wished I had the normal herbs I carry with me. As a ninja, one learns to heal as well as destroy, not only that, I was a weapons master and like the Yuu Yan Archers, could pin a fly from one hundred meters away without killing it. My guardian and teacher made sure that I was an expert by the time I had left. But now more than ever, I needed a firebending teacher. To protect my friends and possibly innocent lives, I couldn't afford relying on my primitive instincts, which was always deadly in my case.

Pulling my tight black top up to reveal my abdomen, I rolled it so it would stay in place. Looking at it, I ripped the bandages off. Weakness would be unknown to me from now on. I would fight it and turn a new leaf. The past was gone, this was a new life. No more wallowing in self pity over events that already occurred and can never be changed. I may have never known her family, but I had a new one now. A new one with a boy who was destined to save the world, I swore to protect him with my life. Lowering my top again, I meditated. Anger would no longer take me. If I couldn't even control my own emotions then I was weak. As I meditated with my rose red lips pressed taught against each other, my blue eyes surrounded by black eyeliner and mascara stared straight in front of me as I concentrated firmly on renewing myself.

The sparring match with the selfish prince played over in my mind over and over. Blowing my bang to the side, I felt my face contort into an expression of disgust at myself. Even though it was Zuko who I had lost my temper in front of, I felt guilt and no matter how hard I tried to conceal it, it always poked its ugly head through. My stomach throbbed as the bruise seemed to grow worse by the day. No more grimaces, no more wincing, I'm a ninja. A ninja doesn't show pain. This was one of the rules my guardian had taught me. The cruel and harsh teacher of mine always reprimanded me for showing too many feelings. He made me hard and cold. No one can make me who I am, I told myself. I am not some clay for people to shape as they please. I shape my own destiny. Bowing my head, I closed my eyes and pondered some more over turning a new leaf. I could do it. I would do it.

My thoughts were disturbed when the injured prince walked into my room. There sat a bag of ice pressed to his head. Looking up, I saw in his golden eyes with that typical anger that never seemed to leave them.

"Do you need the doctor?" he asked me harshly. I could still feel the seething fury in his tone.

I shook my head in defiance. Stubbornly, I wished to heal on my own. If not that, I would ask for some herbs to make my own medicines. I, Mikomi, was an independent woman. More importantly, I was an independent ninja, who swore to protect the Avatar.

Zuko glared daggers into my hard blue eyes. "Show me your abdomen."

Deciding it was best to follow his orders for now, I lifted my top with one hand as I leaned on the bed with the other. His eyes fell on the bluish-green bruise spreading even further over the surface of my pale skin.

"I'm getting the doctor," he said through clenched teeth.

I now leaned on both hands as my top still remained up, revealing my abs. "Don't bother the poor doctor. I think he's had enough of me."

"I don't care," he replied stubbornly as his golden eyes still flickered on my bruised stomach.

Standing slowly as I brushed my black ponytail away, I replied, "Just give me some herbs and I can make better medicines than even him."

"I doubt it," he said, trying to belittle me with his tone. I'm not so easy to break down. As a firebender, I was as stubborn as he was, despite my lack of control.

"As a ninja, I learned to heal as well as destroy," I said, repeating my exact thoughts.

Zuko stared at me for a second then with his free hand that wasn't pressing ice against his head, motioned for me to follow him. I walked behind him and noticed my eyes didn't even come to his shoulders. No wonder he though I was younger.

I hated the following phrase I was about to use and, I'll admit, I have a hard time forcing it out of my mouth, but it was part of changing myself, so my tongue shoved it out between my teeth.

"Zuko…" I said, hesitantly as my eyes lowered themselves to the floor.

He turned around with a bored expression on his face. I looked into his golden eyes and said, "I-I…I'm sorry." Yes, I stuttered, but at least I said it, right? It still counted.

His eyes seemed to have an interested look in them, but he turned without responding and continued to the on-ship infirmary.

Once there, I looked at my surroundings. There were multiple cabinets with many different herbs, which was good. On the right side of the room sat a patient's bed, so I instructed Zuko to take a seat on it.

"Who do you think you are giving me orders?" he growled dangerously as he stared down into my blue eyes.

I took a step closer to him and poked a finger into his chest, with a lazy expression gracing my eyes. "I'm going to play doctor as my…" I choked at the next word. "…apology. So sit."

Zuko glared at me for a second and brushed my hand away from his armored chest. Then, he surrendered and sat on the bed, while I rummaged through the cupboards. Finding all of the correct herbs quickly, I pulled out a bowl and began mashing them as their juice squirted out of them.

I was startled when Zuko began talking behind me, "So as a martial artist, do you have any advice for me?"

I said without turning in a monochromatic tone, "Loosen up, kid."

A huffing sound came behind me as he sighed in disappointment. "Is that it?" he asked, holding the ice to the lump on his head. This time I turned and brushed a black bang away from my face, while my other hand held the bowl.

Indifferently, I said, "Trust me. Even as a firebender loosening up and letting go of things helps, I may not know how to control fire, but I know the basic stances for bending it."

"You weren't holding back were you?" he asked me suddenly.

I mashed the plants in the bowl harder.

"I didn't show you everything I can do," I replied hesitantly. Caution filled my voice, because I knew he'd react badly when I told him I had held back.

The prince growled and glared at me. "What else can you do?"

Looking into the bowl, I saw my reflection in the juices of the plants. I frowned and answered, "I didn't move as fast as I could have." Pausing, I added, "I'm a weapons specialist and I am a highly skilled acrobat."

Zuko rolled his eyes when he learned all of this. I plucked the leftover plant debris out of the mixture I was making and continued mixing various ingredients to add to the soothing nature. Turning, I grabbed a washcloth and approached Zuko. I sat the cloth on my wrist with the hand holding the bowl and grabbed his forearm, moving away the ice from his head.

I grimaced at it. The lump was rather large and the same color as my abdomen.

"Wow, you're lucky you have me here, or you'd have another head," I said, smirking cruelly as the Prince glared. Slowly letting the cloth slide into the bowl, I swished it around, letting it absorb my potion.

Picking it up and wringing it, I asked Zuko to bend over for me so I could actually reach his head. The bed was fairly high. Gently, I dabbed the lump as he hissed.

"Don't worry, it will begin feeling cool after awhile," I said, trying to keep him from roasting me alive. I sat the bowl on the cold, iron floor. With both hands, I gently massaged the lump on his head.

"Why are you doing this?" he questioned.

I couldn't avoid telling him the truth so I said, "Honestly, I felt really bad, which I scolded myself for. My guardian punished me for having emotions."

Zuko's golden eyes turned to my blue ones with interest and questioned why he would punish me for revealing feelings.

Then I replied as I frowned, "According to him, ninja don't have emotions."

The prince winced underneath my touch although I was being as gentle as I could.

"But, I'm trying to change that," I said, hesitantly.

"Why?"

I looked at him for a second then said, "Because, I don't want to be the unfeeling person I am now. I don't want to be what that man made me."

Zuko pondered and then said, "Well, you must feel something, because otherwise you wouldn't be standing here trying to heal me."

I stopped massaging for a second and looked into his golden eyes. He was right. I did feel guilt and sympathy. That was a start.

Nodding, I said, "I want to be able to show emotion on my face too. My voice is almost always monochromatic and I always have a bored expression on my face. Even worse…"

I lowered my eyes in shame as I frowned, while he demanded what was worse.

Removing the cloth from his head and dropping it in the bowl, I jumped up on the bed next to sit next to him.

Staring at the cupboards in front of me, I said, "I used to be a murderer. As a weapon specialist you were taught to kill, not simply injure, but kill."

He turned his head and looked at me through his unscarred eye with interest.

"But ever since I joined the Avatar, he forbade me to kill," I said. "I'm glad he did that. I was turning into a monster, because even when I did kill someone, I felt absolutely no remorse, sometimes I even felt excited."

Zuko was obviously surprised at my revelation. I guess he wouldn't ever really think that I was capable of being a cold-blooded killer. Grabbing the bowl I set on the bed, I rolled up my shirt and began massaging my abdomen. I was surprised when the prince grabbed my wrist.

"Let me," he said, sliding off the bed. "Lay down."

I followed his orders, but I was surprised he offered to do it. I told myself, this is what happens when you do good things, good things come back to you. Although, the idea of him touching my bare abdomen didn't seem all that appealing, as he picked up the cloth and began massaging the bruise as I lay wincing and cringing. Shockingly, his touch was very gentle for a bad-tempered firebender. Closing my eyes, I focused on the gentle, repetitive motions of his hands and found my eyes drooping involuntarily. I fell to sleep laying there and apparently he carried me to my bed, because that's where I woke.