Broken Destiny

by Yoda1976

Xander is shot at 25 and finds out that things are not the way they are supposed to be, and he sets out to make things right, from the beginning. A Buffy/Xander romance.

1. Back to the Hellmouth

AN: Standard disclaimers, I own nothing Buffy. Just playing in Joss's sandbox.

This is the result of a Plot Bunny that viciously attacked me and wouldn't let go until this chapter was done. For fans of the Immortal Principle I will be posting a new chapter soon. I have to work on my actual novel which this has distracted me from. I have a bit of a rant for the rest of this author's note, feel free to skip it and go onto the story. I just needed to vent.

This is a Buffy/Xander fic. I hope the rationale behind the story makes sense to everyone. Sorry Angel and Spike fans, I've never liked them as matches for Buffy because they are Vampires.(This is if I were her friend, for entertainment purposes they are both fun) They can't go out in the day, they can't get regular jobs, they can't do ANY of the things real couples do.

As for Xander, I'm not a huge fan of HIS love life either(again if I was Xander's friend) I mean the first time a woman showed interest in him it was a giant praying mantis, then a mummy, then Faith(Faith I wouldn't mind IF she had her head screwed on straight) then Anya. I like Anya's character, but she wasn't a good match for Xander. She was a thousand year old vengeance demon (which took away his right to tease Buffy about the age of HER boyfriends/ I'm depressed and need something). Their first date was her listing off all the atrocities she'd committed as a vengeance demon. Then she has sex with him which leads to their relationship which was based SOLELY on sex. Its no wonder he left her at the altar. There was NOTHING else they had in common other than Scooby activities.

Which brings me to poor Anya, she has NO human friends outside of the Scooby gang and they are all Xander's friends. After he leaves her at the altar do any of the Scooby gang hang out with her, ask her how she's doing? No, cause they tolerated her for Xander's sake, they weren't friends with her. So after Xander left, she had NO ONE. Is it any wonder she went back to being a demon? Its all she knew, her ENTIRE human existence was centered around Xander and the store. That isn't a life and if a born human was living life like that it would be concerning.

Anyway, sorry about the rant before the story. Now for the consideration and approval of , I humbly present Chapter One of Broken Destiny, Back to the Hellmouth. Please review.

Back To The Hellmouth

Xander and Buffy walked along the streets of Cleveland, he had his arm around her and she was laying her head on his shoulder. They were walking in silence, both friends were beyond the need to fill silence with words. They both knew this was a hard day for her, the fifth anniversary of her mother's death and the first one Dawn wasn't around for. It started to snow a little as they walked back home.

"I wonder how many walls I'm going to have to fix when we get there," he said.

"We were only gone for three hours and Faith promised to keep the girls in line," Buffy said snuggling into his arm.

"Who do you think I'm worried about? You know how competitive she gets and if ANY of trainees giver her any grief... "

"She'll take it to the dojo, you know that," Buffy said.

"Yes, but the LAST time she was in there..."

"There was troll with her," Buffy said.

"Oh...I forgot that. Ok, Faith can keep the kiddos in line, until Mommy and Daddy come home," Xander said and was rewarded with a smile and a light punch on the shoulder.

"They don't call us that," she said.

"No, they don't verbalize but they think it, and seriously Buff none of these girls could do better for a Mom," Xander said. The trainee slayers living with them all came from broken homes or the streets. They did their best to keep the ones who had good families with their families. Which was why Dawn wasn't in town. She'd finally been assigned a Slayer and she needed to be with her. They arrived at the school and stood there for a bit.

"That's sweet, but I know who'd be better for them," Buffy said, her eyes glistening with unshed tears.

"I miss her too," Xander said hugging his friend.

"I really needed this tonight," she said as they embraced. They never saw the man approach.

"Give me all of your money!" a harsh voice said breaking the two friends apart.

"Oh...come on! Not tonight!" Buffy said her voice pitched up in annoyance.

"Come on! Give me!" the mugger said and just as Xander began to move against their assailant he produced a gun.

"Easy, buddy...we don't have much on us but its yours. No need to get crazy," Xander said slowly putting his hands up.

"Lady first," the mugger said totally misreading who was the more dangerous.

"At least he's a gentlemugger," Xander quipped.

"No jokes!" the mugger said pointing the gun at Xander.

"Calm down, it's just the way he deals with stress," Buffy said, opening her purse and slowly approaching him. Then a police siren sounded and the mugger flinched and the gun went off. Buffy flew into action kicking the gun away from the mugger and incapacitating him in a half a second.

"That'll teach you to play with...Xander!" Buffy screamed as she turned to see a red stain spreading over his shirt. His face looked blank as he sank to his knees. The Slayer ran to him fear in her eyes and stopped him from hitting the cold concrete. She opened his shirt and her mouth opened as she saw the entrance wound near his heart. She trembled and tried to force herself to think.

She soon became aware of a voice, "...that's right, the Joyce Summer's School for Girls...one victim, gunshot wound, hurry."

Buffy looked up to see the concerned face of her sister Slayer, the brunette was applying pressure to Xander's wound. It was like a nightmare for Buffy. She didn't know how long they were like that or when the ambulance arrived. They placed Xander on a gurney and took him to the ambulance.

"I'm going with him," she heard herself say.

"Are you his wife?" one of the paramedics asked.

"Uh..." Buffy said seemingly confused by the question.

"Yes, she is," Faith lied to the paramedic and turned to Buffy and said, "Go with him, B. He needs you, I'll keep an eye on the girls and call everyone."

Buffy hugged the other Slayer and got into the ambulance.

---

"What's going on?" Xander asked finding himself in a hospital.

"You're dying," a dark haired man said, he looked to be thirtysomething and the low end of that. He was dressed in jeans and wore a polo shirt.

"What happened?" Xander asked, strangely unsurprised by this news.

"You were shot by the mugger," he said simply.

"Is Buffy alright?" Xander asked suddenly concerned for his friend.

"Physically yes, emotionally, she's not doing real well," the man said, sounding sad.

"I need to see her," Xander said.

"Not a good idea, she's with your body. It's technically still alive, but that is only because of the machines. The doctors want to give you every chance, but they'll want to pull the plug in about twenty four hours," he said clinically.

"You've done this before, haven't you?" Xander said.

"My names is Azrieal. I'm the Angel of Death," Azrieal introduced himself.

"I still need to see her," Xander said.

"It'll just break your heart, son," the angel said.

"I know, but I can't not see her and be the man in death I wanted to be in life," Xander said.

"I thought you'd say that, but remember, I warned you. By the way, Faith brought the girls to the hospital and the rest of your family is coming. They'll be in time to say goodbye before your body gives out," Azrieal said as Xander started moving to the ICU room he was in.

Xander entered the room and heard soft sobbing. He saw Buffy next to the bed that held his body. She was holding his hand and crying softly. He came around the other side of the bed.

"Xander...please...come back...I love you and I need you here. Please...don't do this...don't die on me," she said through her tears.

"I would Buffy, if I could, but I don't think I've got any choice in this one," he said sadly his heart breaking at seeing his friend in such distress.

"I always thought I'd have more time to get ready, that you'd always be there when I was ready. If you come back to me I swear I won't wait anymore, I won't take this for granted and show you just how important you are to me," she said and paused and blew her nose as tears continued to fall.

She sniffled and continued, "I'd been thinking about this for sometime. About how you'd react when I finally came on the prowl for you. You're always confused in my daydreams, at first. Then you get the message and the first words out of your mouth is..." Buffy broke down again into crying.

Xander wept with her and finished what she was saying, "Whoever cast the love spell is on kitchen duty for a month." He ached to be able to hold her. Then he heard Azriel scream, "What?!"

He was torn he wanted to stay with Buffy but his curiosity at what the Angel was going on about. Finally he decided he'd have eternity to find out what had his wings in a bind, he didn't have that with Buffy.

"Buffy...I'm sooo sorry," Xander said.

"Live Xander, and I promise I will make every day one you're glad you lived," she said tears still flowing. She stood and Xander thought for a minute that she was leaving, but she just straightened the covers and leaned down and kissed him softly and the lips. "I love you, Xander. Never forget that."

"Buffy?" Xander heard another voice and looked up and saw a red faced Dawn. Buffy looked up and saw her sister and went over to her and hugged her tightly and both girls cried.

"How'd you get here?" Buffy asked.

"Willow, she and the coven have been teleporting everyone here. She'll be here soon," Dawn said through her tears.

"I'm glad you're here," Buffy said hugging her sister again.

"Me too, can I see him?" Dawn asked.

"Of course, I'm going to get myself a drink, I've been here since he got here," Buffy said and kissed her sister's cheek.

Buffy left Dawn with Xander and she went over to his bed and sat in the chair. She cried as she watched the machines breathe for him. She was quiet for a bit, then spoke. "You're going to get through this, Xander. I know you are because you've got so much to live for. She's ready, she hasn't said anything, but I'm her sister and I know she's ready. The way she talks about you in her letters I know I'm about to get a brother in law. So you get better and make my sister happy. That's an order, soldier!"

"Yes, Ma'am," Xander said to her and snapped off a sloppy salute that would've gotten him fifty push ups on any parade ground in the country.

"I love you, Xander," the younger Summers girl said and kissed his forehead.

"I already tried that, he isn't Sleeping Beauty," Buffy said holding two cups of coffee.

"Bet yours was better than mine," Dawn said with a sad smile.

"Not good enough," Buffy said sadly. "I don't know what I'm going to do without him, Dawnie!" The senior slayer broke down again and Dawn held her sister and both girls cried.

Xander cried watching Buffy break down, and wanted to leave, but he just couldn't. This was the last thing he could do for her and he would see it through, no matter how much it hurt. He moved over to the crying women and put his arms around them and was surprised that he didn't go through them, and he held them.

---

Buffy and Dawn were evicted from his room shortly after that and Xander followed them out. He stopped in front of Azriel who looked like he was sucking on a particularly sour lemon.

"How come..." Xander said trailing off his emotions rising again.

"You needed it as much as they did," the angel said simply

"Did they..." Xander broke off and sobbed then began again, " Did they know?"

"Yes, on some level and it will be a comfort to them," Azriel said.

"Good," Xander said.

"Now we need to talk," Azriel said, sounding serious.

"That's ominous coming from the Angel of Death," Xander said crossing his arms.

"We've been made aware of an atrocity," the angel said.

"Really and that has what to do with me?" Xander asked.

"Only everything. They win as things stand," the Angel said.

"What do you mean they win?" Xander asked.

"This world will be sent to Hell on April 22, 2024 at five thirty in the afternoon, Greenwich Mean Time."

"So what do we need to do to stop it?" Xander asked suddenly all business.

"We can't, not directly anyway. However knowing about it has revealed that the other side broke the rules and that gives an opportunity," the Angel said and turned and started walking toward a light that was suddenly there.

"I'm not ready yet," Xander said.

"Come with me, you need to hear this and you also need to make a decision, if you want I'll bring you back to say goodbye after we tell you about this," the Angel said.

"What are you talking about?" Xander asked.

"This apocalypse was supposed to be stopped. Only the ones that stopped it were never born," the Angel said.

"So someone pulled off a successful Terminator on them?" Xander asked.

"Yes, actually, the other side killed their father," the angel said. and Xander's jaw dropped.

---

"Wow...no wonder Buffy never talked about this place, it's really nice," Xander said as they arrived in Heaven.

"You're getting a dumbed down version, just in case you say yes. We don't need you suicidal," Azriel said.

"So my children were supposed to save the world?" Xander asked.

"Yes, they went into the family business you could say. Would you like to meet them?"

"But I thought..." Xander said trailing off.

"Time has no meaning here, Xander," Azriel said.

"Ok, sure, I guess," Xander said.

The angel led him over to the Gates and they opened and a young man and woman stepped out of them. The girl was about Dawn's height but other than that didn't really look like her. The young man was tall and broad in the shoulder, he looked like he worked out a lot.

"Xander, this is Tara Joyce and Jessie Riley Harris," the angel introduced.

"My kids?" Xander whispered and slowly approached them.

"Hi, Dad," Jessie said and went to him and hugged his father.

"Hey, don't hog him, brother!" Tara said and hugged her father as he cried.

"How old are you two?" Xander asked.

"We're appearing at the age we were on April 22, 2024. Tara's eighteen, I'm sixteen," Jessie said.

"Except because of that mugger you won't be there," Xander said.

"It hasn't been finalized yet, but its looking like it," Tara said.

"What do you mean hasn't been finalized yet?" Xander asked looking at his children and paused at Tara's face and closed his eyes as he realized who their mother was. "When is your birthday, Tara?"

"November 22nd, 2006," she answered with a smirk.

"You've told us this story a lot, but suffice it to say that you really helped Mom through the fifth anniversary of Grandma's death. She says it was because Aunt Dawn wasn't around to talk sense into her, but we all know that even Aunt Faith wasn't going to keep her off you that night," Jessie said with a smirk that made Xander think he was looking in a mirror for a moment.

"So we tell our kids all about our sex lives?" Xander asked.

"Oh...ewww...no...but when one wants to know about the circumstances behind their birth, there are some details that can't be avoided," Tara said.

"Just my luck," Xander said, sounding a bit angry.

"That's what we need to talk about," Azriel said seriously. "Kids, go get your grandmother she needs to be here when I tell your father what we found out."

"Sure, Az," Jessie said and the two siblings left.

Xander's lips turned up into a small smile as he watched the kids...his kids...Buffy's kids...his and Buffy's kids.

"They aren't goats, silly," a painfully familiar voice said.

"Buffy?" Xander choked out.

"Relax, remember time has no meaning here?" Buffy said and hugged him tight.

"Our children?" he said.

"Yup, I just stopped to say hi, I suspect you'll be seeing me soon enough," she said and left.

"Stubborn woman," Azriel said.

"What?" Xander asked.

"She wasn't supposed to stop by," Azriel said.

"Since when does she ever do what she's supposed to do?" Xander asked.

"Most of the time actually, but not when it comes to you," Azriel said.

Xander turned back to the Gate as his kids came back, with Joyce Summers. Xander's breath caught when he saw her.

"Hello, Xander. How do you like my grandchildren?" she asked.

"They're great, Joyce. We've missed you," he said hugging her.

"I know," she said.

"Ok, now that everyone's here we need to get started," Azriel said.

"What is going on?"

"Well, simply put, someone or something has been ripping your Destiny apart," Azriel said.

"What do you mean?" Xander asked.

"You were supposed to fall in love with Buffy in high school," Joyce said.

"I did," Xander said, confused.

"Yes, you got your part right, but she didn't. She was supposed to fall in love with you too," Joyce said.

"Huh?"

"We only uncovered this after you were shot, but something has been conspiring to keep you and Buffy apart," Azriel said.

"Conspiring to keep us apart?" Xander asked looking back and forth between Joyce and Azriel.

"Yes. Angel was never supposed to be in Sunnydale when Buffy moved there. Whistler was fed bad information," Azriel said, sitting on a cloud.

"Whistler?" Xander asked.

"You never met him, he's a Balance demon. He showed Angel what his life could be and showed him Buffy, and the boy fell HARD," Azriel said.

"Don't remind me, I lived every miserable moment," Xander said, trying not to sound bitter.

"But what you didn't know, and what HE still doesn't know, is it wasn't love. At least not the kind that happy ever after is made of," Azriel said.

"Yeah, Uncle Angel took the news of your and Mom's engagement kinda hard. I guess he went on about cookies for an hour when he found out," Tara said.

"Off topic," Azriel said.

"Ok, go on, Angel wasn't supposed to be there? How were we supposed to find out about the Harvest if he doesn't do his cryptic thing?" Xander asked.

"Luke and Buffy's dreams; none of his warnings were needed, they gave you a bit of a head start, but not needed. Which brings us to the crux of the matter, someone maneuvered him there to keep Buffy from noticing you."

"But what about after he left?" Xander asked.

"After he left she was healing and wasn't ready, neither were you, honestly. You and Cordelia dated, the Fluke happened, and she broke up with you, just so the bastard could get you a more tempting morsel" Jessie said.

"Anya," Xander said, looking down in shame.

"Yes, however it wouldn't have been enough so they had to do one more thing. Parker," Joyce said.

"Parker, what does he have to do with it?"

"You remember the first time you saw Buffy after you got back to town after graduation?" Azriel asked.

"Yeah, Buffy was down, I cheered her up. It's what I do," Xander said.

"Yes, and she was about to think about giving you a shot until she saw Parker," Azriel said.

"That does just SO much for my self esteem," Xander said, bitterly.

"It would've been weeks or months before it became a conscious thought, but it would've happened if he hadn't...used her," Joyce said, sounding angry.

"And by the time she recovered from that to start thinking about romance again you were busy with Anya," Azriel said.

"Then I left her at the altar," Xander said.

"Yes, not a good situation, but it was one that should have never came up because she was never supposed to become human again," Joyce said, soothingly.

"What do you mean?" Xander asked.

"You were the only thing that made her happy in this world, Xander. She wasn't meant to live in the world as a human. And if it wasn't for the first interference by sending Angel to Sunnydale, it wouldn't have happened," Joyce said.

"Why not?"

"Because you and Buffy would've been dating and the Fluke would've never happened, then Cordy wouldn't have made that wish hence...no human Anya," Azriel said.

"Who is this that's been messing with my life?"

"Lucifer," Azriel said.

"Lucifer? You mean the DEVIL takes a personal interest in my love life?" Xander shouted paling.

"Yes, and it was a brilliant move, it took out ten of our champions with us being none the wiser," Azriel said.

"How?" Xander asked.

"Your kids, Faith and Riley's kids and your grandkids," Joyce said.

"I need a drink," Xander said.

"Anyway, this gives us an opportunity," Azriel continued.

"What kind of opportunity?" Xander asked.

"Normally we can't violate time on Earth, but the other side did it which allows us to do so as well," Azriel said.

"You mean they used knowledge of the future to fuck up Buffy's life, made her miserable?" Xander asked, anger building in his voice.

"Yes," Azriel said.

"What do I have to do?" Xander asked.

"Understand that you don't have to do this, you have a place in Heaven waiting," Azriel said.

"Yes, but what good is that if..." he choked up at the memories of Buffy grieving over his broken body. Pleading that he come back.

"You go and take care of my girls like you always have, Xander. Please," Joyce said hugging him.

"Joyce, this has to be his choice," Azriel warned.

"She's right, I have no choice. Someone or something messed with my life and it needs an ass kicking and I no no one better to deliver it than Buffy," he said.

"It won't be easy," Azriel said.

"Just get me back to my body, make sure I live and I'll handle the rest," Xander said.

"Very well," the angel said and touched Xander's forehead.

---

Xander woke up and rubbed his eyes, when he woke he found himself in very familiar surroundings. He shook his head and looked at his clock, it read six am. He got out of bed, the same bed he spent high school sleeping in, when he actually slept here.

"What is going on? I was kind of expecting to wake up in lots of pain with two beautiful women shedding tears of joy!" Xander shouted to the ceiling.

He then sighed and knowing this room and this house was at the bottom of a crater in his time set out to find out today's date. He went downstairs to find his parents passed out on the couch. He shook his head at the pitiful sight, the fact that this no longer seemed normal to him didn't quite register. He went outside and found a paper and looked at the date. Sunday, March 9th, 1997. He gasped, he knew that date, or rather tomorrow's date, all too well. Buffy would start at Sunnydale tomorrow. A smile crept up on his face. She'd be glad he was alright...then the smile collapsed, no she wouldn't. That night hadn't happened yet, nor had the previous nine years. She wouldn't know him. Giles wouldn't know him, Willow wouldn't...ok Willow would know him but it wouldn't be HIS Willow. She wouldn't be the girl he talked out of destroying the world. However now that he thought about it that wouldn't be a bad thing.

It was Sunday so he didn't have school, but that didn't mean he didn't have things to do. He started walking to clear his head. He thought about what Azriel said. If they sent him HERE there had to be a reason for it. So he put on his metaphorical Watcher's hat and made a mental list of what he knew. First, Lucifer had taken an interest in his life if for no other reason than his kids threw a major monkey wrench in his plans. He closed his eyes as he thought about them and swore that he'd do whatever it took to ensure they had a chance to live.

Second and related to his kids was that he and Buffy were destined to be together. This was a bittersweet thought because in the here and now she didn't know he existed, and that was literally. They wouldn't meet until tomorrow at school, and though his memory was fuzzy about it he didn't think she would be overly pleased if he confessed all to her right away. He still remembered the conversation he'd overheard in the library that day. She really wanted to be done with it at the moment.

Third, and also related to Buffy not knowing he existed was that none of the people he'd have gone to for help would know him either. Which meant that he had no one to talk to or bounce ideas off of. He hung his head, he was a scooby without a gang. He shook his head to clear it and realized where he was.

"Ah, crap," he said as he looked at Buffy's house. This was the last place he needed to be. He didn't know if he'd be able to control himself if he saw either one of them. He turned to go when he heard a voice.

"Hello, young man?" a woman's voice said, and he winced. He knew that voice having just heard it a hour ago in Heaven. He turned and saw Joyce she had a box in her arms, obviously moving in.

"Yes?" he said, his voice cracking with emotion.

"Do you have time to help us pack some stuff in, it's just me and my daughter and we could use another set of arms. I'd pay you of course," she said.

"I'd be happy to help, but don't worry about paying me," Xander said speaking before he really thought about.

"You're sweet, I hope everyone at Buffy's new school is as nice as you," Joyce said smiling.

"There's two or three of us, Mrs…." Xander said stopping himself just before letting out that he knew her name.

"Summers, Joyce Summers," she said.

"Xander Harris. I'd shake hands but you've got your hands full," he said kicking himself for letting himself get roped into this before he really had a plan for dealing with Buffy.

"Nice to meet you, there's plenty in the U Haul," Joyce said.

"Right," Xander said glad for the interruption of the conversation. Buffy would kill to see her mother again and he felt a little guilty at being able to.

He went into the U-Haul and picked up a box and was shocked at how heavy it felt. He tried again and frowned, it couldn't weigh more than twenty five pounds and he routinely moved that much every day. Then he looked at his arms and was dismayed at how thin they were. He sighed.

"I guess chasing after sugar hyped mini Slayers is better exercise than I thought," he muttered.

"Excuse me?" he heard Buffy say, and it was all he could do to stop himself from greeting her by name.

"Hi, my names Xander, I was passing by and your mother asked me to help bring in boxes," Xander said.

She smiled, the same smile that always melted his heart every time he saw it, yet she looked impossibly young. There were mini Slayers her age back home...a home he would have to get back to the hard way.

"She really didn't have to, we've really got it," Buffy said picking up the box that just so recently defeated Xander, apparently she hadn't seen him struggle with it.

"Careful with that one, its a bit heavy," he said, unable to resist teasing her, even if she wasn't aware of the joke.

She then suddenly and intentionally almost lost it when she realized he'd already tried lifting it.

Instinctively Xander put his hands out to catch the box and his hands came into contact with hers. Buffy looked a bit flustered at the contact as he took over the Box from Hell, and she took something more his speed. They walked into the house.

"Where does this go?" Xander asked.

"Hmmm...not sure," Buffy said and started looking around the box for any identifying marks.

"Rats...it must be next to you," she said and Xander carefully turned the box around until Buffy brightened.

"Ah...kitchen," she said.

"So what do you have in here? Your own caveman to start fires?" Xander asked.

Buffy laughed, "Go, you do a good job and there MIGHT be cookies in it for you."

"Cookies?" Xander said eagerly and started moving toward the kitchen.

They spent four hours empting the truck and Xander was surprised how quickly Buffy became comfortable around him and he could also see a calculating look cross Joyce's face as she watch them interact. Once they were done Joyce drove the U Haul back to the rental center leaving Buffy and Xander alone at the house. Xander debated about telling her the truth, but decided against it for right now.

"Cookies as promised," she said as she sat a plate before him with a glass of milk.

"Thank you," he said and took a bite out of the cookie and closed his eyes. "Chips ahoy, a cold glass of milk and a beautiful girl...I can now die happy."

Buffy chuckled and said, "Thanks for helping, you didn't have to and it made it go faster."

"Ah...what are friends for," Xander said simply.

"I like the sound of that," Buffy said and smiled and kissed him on the cheek. "You're sweet."

Xander smiled and felt himself blush, "Seriously, I didn't mind."

He looked at the clock in the kitchen and saw it was after five. He sighed, " I better go, I do have a couple of things to do today besides play white knight."

"Oh," she said sounding disappointed, and continued, "I was hoping you might stay for dinner. My mom's is an excellent cook, though tonight it might be fast food." She winced at the last.

"I'd love to stay, but I really can't tonight, but soon," he said with a smile.

"Will I see you at school?" she asked.

"Count on it," he said and took her hand brushing his lips on it causing her to blush. Damn it why couldn't have been this easy the first time around. He smiled and left Buffy's house.

---

An hour later Xander arrived at his destination after a stop at the butcher's shop for a preemptive peace offering. He figured that who he was seeking would be up for the night. He found the door to the apartment and knocked, hoping he wasn't already out. He was about to give up when Angel opened the door with a stake in hand.

Xander put his hands up, "I come in peace!"

"Who are you and what do you want?" Angel asked.

"My name is Xander Harris and you don't know me yet, but I come bearing information, and blood," Xander said, holding up a brown butchers bag.

"Blood?" Angel said skeptically.

"I know you are a vampire, and I know about the curse, so are we going to stand here like idiots or are you going to let me come in so we can chat?"

"Who sent you?" Angel asked suddenly suspicious.

"The Powers that Be, God...who knows, but I've got a story to tell you and it is in both of our interests for you to hear me out," Xander said.

"Come in," he said standing aside.

"Thank you. Here's your blood, consider it a preemptive peace offering 'cause you aren't going to like a lot of what I have to say, but you need to hear it," Xander said handing him the brown paper bag.

"Ok, say what you have to say."

"First let me tell you that I'm from the future. I know you in the future and to establish my bona fides let me start by telling you about you," Xander began.

"Ok, I'm listening," Angel said.

"Thank you, Frasier," Xander quipped, hoping the show was actually on the air.

"Funny, now talk," Angel said, sounding annoyed.

"First you're here because of a balance demon named Whistler. He told you that you were meant to do good and help people. That part he did get right, but he was mistaken about one important piece of information. You aren't supposed to help the Slayer," Xander said.

"I'm not, and who's going to stop me? You?" Angel asked.

"Nope, as I said you're needed, just not here and not now. Buffy is going to be just fine without your mystery man routine. In fact she'll be much happier without it," Xander said.

"What is this about?" Angel asked.

"It's about your quest for redemption, her happiness and the lives of countless people who aren't going to die again, not on my watch," Xander said fiercely.

"You better watch your tone, boy. You have no idea what you are messing with," Angel said, sounding dangerous.

Xander laughed, "If only that were so. I live on a Hellmouth so cut the act, Angel. Both of us know you aren't going to hurt me, so chill. I'm doing this for your own good as surprising as that is," Xander said.

"Really, and how do you know what's best for me?" Angel asked.

"Cause I've been around this block before, remember. The gypsies cursed you with a soul Angel, but no one ever told you about the loophole," Xander said.

"Loophole?" Angel asked.

"Yes, one moment of pure happiness and that soul you're so proud of takes an extended vacation and you KNOW what that means," Xander said, seriously.

Angel paled even more than he was naturally, "That is NOT a joking matter, boy."

"Do I look like I'm joking? And stop calling me boy, I'm twenty-five years old, or at least I was when I died," Xander said.

"Died?" Angel asked.

"Remember the future, maybe the gypsies should've cursed you with a memory," Xander said unable to resist ribbing him.

"Very funny," Angel groused, standing up.

"Long story short, I was walking home with Buffy and we were mugged, the mugger got spooked and fired off a shot that I happened to be in the way of. Then Azriel came for me and told me that my whole life wasn't like it was supposed to be," Xander said.

"You were walking home with Buffy? You live together in the future?" Angel asked, sounding a bit jealous.

"Well, yes...but not that way, at least not when I died. It's a school for Slayers and we train them to make the most of their power," Xander said, picking up on the vampires tone and not really wanting to start a fight.

"There can only be one Slayer at a time," Angel said.

"A lot can change in nine years," Xander said, sighing.

"I assume that if you know about this loophole that it happened?" Angel asked, apparently missing that Buffy was a twenty-five year old Slayer.

"Yes, and it was the second worst year of my life," Xander said.

"How?" Angel asked.

"Buffy," Xander said without emotion.

"We were in love?"

"She was. I think you thought you were, but you left her too easily for it to be the real thing," Xander said.

"Who are you to know what I felt...will feel?" Angel asked, sitting down again, his tone low.

"Just calling it as I see it. I don't doubt you cared for her, but I don't think it was real love. Not the kind that lasts and if you'd think about it you know any relationship with a human you have is probably doomed," Xander said.

"What did he do?" Angel asked.

Xander leaned back and sighed, "Lots of death, Angelus trying to end the world, Buffy being forced to send you to hell to stop it."

"So what do you think I should do?" Angel asked.

"Leave town, she doesn't need your information at best you only gave us a few hours heads up which was never critical," Xander said.

"So I'll be more careful, not let her love me," he said softly.

"You're smarter than that, gumshoe. You can't control how she feels anymore than I can. Nor should you want to," Xander said.

"Gumshoe?" Angel asked.

"When you finally come to your senses and leave you go to LA and become a PI, making a living helping the helpless," Xander said.

Angel nodded, " What about the Harvest?"

"Buffy wins, like she always does," Xander said with a smile.

"You love her," Angel said.

"She's a hard person not to love, and I won't lie there's a part of me that leaping for joy at the thought you won't be around, but not for the reasons my seventeen year old self would be. I SAW how much you hurt her Angel and there's a part of me that wants to dust you just for the amount of pain you caused her," Xander said sighing, "However over the years I've come to respect what you are doing in L.A. You're helping people and doing good. Which is why once you get settled we need contact information."

"You aren't wanting to cut me out completely?" Angel asked surprised.

"Not if you're serious about redeption and not just doing this to get into a pretty girls pants," Xander said.

"Redemption? Seems like it would be impossible for someone like me," Angel said.

"So you're just doing this to get in her pants?" Xander asked though he thought he knew the real answer.

"No...I thought it would be nice to try to love her while redeeming myself, but not at the price of my soul,"

"We're on the same side, Angel. We don't really like each other, but as I said before I respect you, and I'd like to think the feeling is mutual," Xander said.

"Ok...I'll leave tonight; I don't know if I believe you or not, but I can't risk that monster getting out," Angel said.

"Ok…" Xander said, letting out his breath now that the tough part was over, maybe, "Now I need some advice," Xander asked.

"Really?" Angel asked sounding surprised.

"Yeah, it shocks me too, Deadboy, but so far you're the only one I've told about my situation, 'cause quite frankly I don't think I had much choice but to tell you what I know to get what needs to happen for everyone's sakes. Where I'm having difficulty is should I tell anyone else?"

"That isn't an easy question. If you do tell anyone, they may think you're crazy, or worse like you have all the answers," Angel said.

"Yeah, but at the sametime I need a sounding board. It's how we always solved our problems, a Scooby can't be a lone wolf. Each of us has tried it and it never works," Xander said sighing.

"Scooby?" Angel questioned.

"It's what we end up calling ourselves cause we fight monsters," Xander said.

"Ah...Anyway, about your problem I don't have any epiphanies to share with you, but I think you will need someone to talk to. If you are telling the truth it will be a heavy burden to bear, especially the first time you fail to save someone you thought you could," Angel said.

"That's kind of what I thought, fortunately, I have a candidate in mind," Xander said.

"Buffy?" Angel asked.

"Tempting, but no, Giles," Xander said.

"Giles?" Angel asked.

"Buffy's watcher," Xander said.

"Ah...can't tell you what to do, but I think that would be the best of a lot of bad options."

"Isn't that what life is? Picking the least bad of our options?" Xander asked.

"A bit young to be that cynical aren't you?" Angel asked.

"You go through nine years of being a sex object of demons and unrequited love and leaving an ex demon at the altar and see how cynical you are," Xander deadpanned.

"I think I believe you," Angel said suddenly.

"Why?"

"No one could make up that sentence without having suffered through all of its implied pain," Angel said.

"Are we bonding?" Xander asked.

"Maybe," Angel said and both the young man and the vampire shuddered at the thought.

"Weird day," Xander said.

"Yes," Angel said.

"I better go, I have to get up early tomorrow for school," Xander said.

"Give me your number and I'll be in touch with contact information," Angel said.

"Just send a business card to the Sunnydale High School Library, care of Rupert Giles."

---

Xander soon found himself home and based on the quiet, the two people the law recognized as his parents were already passed out. He saw his backpack and opened it up he found math homework still not finished, he took a look at it and before he realized it, it was finished.

"Huh….when did I get good at doing this?" he asked himself then he remembered long hours helping mini slayers with their math homework back home. He smiled at the memories yet to come and shook his head. He looked at his clock and saw it was midnight and turned in, setting it for six.

Morning came far too soon and Xander showered and dressed and was out of the house by six thirty. He spent the entire walk to school trying to remember his class schedule but for the life of him he just couldn't. 'Great, I'm going to have to get a copy which will earn me weird looks,' he thought to himself. He stopped by the coffee shop for breakfast spending his last five dollars, though how he HAD five dollars was a pleasant mystery. He sighed and thought about what to say to Giles. Somehow saying "Hey G man, how's the watching business oh by the way I'm from the future,' would work, but he couldn't come up with anything else LESS lame.

He frowned as he sipped his coffee, and then finished off the donut. He reached into his pocket to get his phone to check the time and winced when he realized it was nine years in the future in a Cleveland hospital. He closed his eyes in remembered pain at seeing Buffy and Dawn crying over him. He was really glad Azriel sent him back before Willow had shown up, seeing all three of his girls crying over him would've been too much.

"You look like someone ran over your puppy," a familiar voice said, he looked up and Buffy was looking at him.

"Someone did," he deadpanned.

"Oh my god...I'm so sorry," she rushed to say blushing.

He tried to keep a straight face but he couldn't and a snort of laughter escaped, "Sorry, I was teasing. Just woolgathering."

She hit him lightly on the shoulder, "You...you really had me there. So does this place have good coffee?"

"Yes, what are you doing here? Not that I mind," Xander asked.

"Caffeine, Mom's waiting in the car," she said.

"Ok, I'll see you at school then," he said.

"We...we could give you a lift, if you'd like," she said, suddenly sounding unsure and Xander found himself in very unfamiliar territory. Buffy was coming on to him and looked afraid.

"Ummm...sure, if you're sure your Mom wouldn't mind," he said, not having to fake sounding nervous.

"Great! I'll just go get my and Mom's coffee and we'll go," she said flashing the smile that always melted his heart, even when he was pissed at her for doing something stupid.

Once Buffy had the coffee they went to Joyce's Jeep and Xander opened the door for her and caught Joyce's approving smile.

"Good morning, Xander," she said cheerfully as Buffy handed her her coffee.

"I offered to give Xander a ride to school, Mom," Buffy said, sounding more like herself.

"Mornin', Mrs. Summers. Thank you for indulging in your daughter's request to play chauffeur for me," Xander said as he got into the backseat with his pack.

"It's a pleasure, I just hope Buffy makes more friends like you," Joyce said, smiling as she pulled out.

"Mom!" Buffy complained.

"She's going to be fine, Mrs. Summers. In fact I think her and Willow are going to be best friends," Xander said with a grin.

"Who's Willow? Your girlfriend?" Buffy asked, again sounding unsure.

"Well, she is a girl and she is my friend, but we aren't dating," Xander said deciding against teasing Buffy some more.

"Oh...good!" Buffy said brightening.

"I'm serious, you two are going to be best friends," he said smiling.

Buffy just smiled at him and Xander caught yet another appraising look from Joyce and he started feeling like a ribeye.

They arrived at school shortly after that, and Xander and Buffy got out but Joyce called her back and whispered something to her and a shadow crossed her face.

"What was that about?" he asked.

"Nothing, just Mom stuff," she said, frowning.

"Ok, but if you ever want to talk, my ears aren't this large for no reason," he said eliciting a smile from Buffy.

"Thank you, I'll keep that in mind," she said as they walked into the school.

"I'll meet you at the office, I need to ask Willow to look over my math homework. Then I'll take you to the library to help you get your books," Xander said.

"That'll be nice," she said.

"Don't think this is me being honorable, I just need to thank you for that outfit. Dressed to slay," he said with a grin as she blushed.

"Flattery...might get you somewhere," she said with a smile.

"You look nice, seriously," he said with a smile and then saw Willow. "The office is right there, I'll be there shortly."

"Thank you," Buffy said, sounding grateful.

Xander ran to catch up with Willow and had to call out, "Hey Willow!"

"Hi Xander, how was your weekend?" the redhead asked.

"Surreal," he said.

"What happened?" she asked sounding concerned.

"You'll see when you look at my math homework. I think I understood it," Xander said.

Willow lit up, "Really? That's great!"

Then Xander heard another voice, one he hadn't heard in nine years, " Hey bro! Did my eyes deceive me or were you getting out of the same vehicle as the hot new girl?"

Xander stared and paled, "Jesse." Xander wanted to cry and take the other boy in a hug, a manly bro type hug, but a hug nevertheless.

"Are you ok, Xander? You look like you've seen a ghost," Willow asked, now really sounding concerned.

"Yeah, yeah, I'm fine, just deja vu," he lied. "Yeah, buddy. I was taking a walk yesterday and her Mom shanghaied me into helping them empty the U Haul, then we bumped into each other at the coffee shop," Xander said.

"So talk!" Jessie said.

"Not right now, I promised her I'd help her get started, books and things, but both of you can meet her at lunch, you'll love her, I promise," Xander said, his mood lightening.

"See you in class," Willow said, sounding wistful.

Xander fought not to turn around and comfort his friend, he wouldn't have noticed it when he was sixteen, but it still tore at him to know she was in pain because of him, even if it worked out in the end.

He went into the office and asked for a copy of his schedule and got the weird look he was expecting when he saw Buffy come out of the Principal's office.

"I see you survived the Dungeon?" Xander said.

"Not really very dungeony in there. Mr. Flutie reminds me of a Mr. Rogers on anxiety meds, but I think he means well," Buffy said.

Xander nearly slapped himself, how could he forget that? He stammered a bit and said, "Yes, but it's not the current inhabitant that makes it a dungeon."

They walked to the library and entered the familiar space. The last time Xander had seen it it had been filled with fertilizer to blow up the Mayor. He shook his head a bit and led Buffy to the counter.

"Giles should be around here somewhere, he can help you get your books," Xander said.

"Thank you, you've been really, really sweet and it's really made my day," she said and kissed his cheek.

"Don't worry about it, like I said yesterday, what are friends for?" Xander said, blushing.

"Miss Summers?" a voice with a British accent said.

"That's me, you were expecting me?" Buffy asked.

"Buffy, of course he was expecting you, how many new students does March see?" Xander said, drawing attention to himself.

"Uh...quite right, so what is it that you need?" he asked, noticing his charge wasn't alone as he hoped.

"Here's my list," she said said handing it to him and he set off to gather what she needed.

"Now we wait while librarian man goes and saves us from ignorance and fun having," Xander said.

"Don't you have a class to go too?" she asked, smiling.

"Actually," he stole a look at his schedule, " I have a free period right now." He was surprised that he actually DID have a free period. "So I was hoping for the opportunity to carry your books for you."

"You haven't earned that privilege…" she began and waited for the beginnings of the look of disappointment on his face to form then added, "Yet." Then smiled at him..

Xander smiled back, his heart going a million miles an hour, a feeling he was quite familiar with when it came to Buffy.

"I shall endeavour to become worthy of being your pack mule," he said grinning.

Once Buffy got her books they left the library and Buffy was smiling. Xander went about his day and then lunch arrived and he soon found Willow and Buffy talking in the courtyard. He hopped the wall and sat on it with his feet on the bench.

"So this is the new girl?" Jessie asked.

"Yes, and she has a name, Buffy Summers, Jessie McNally, best friend. Jessie, this is Buffy Summers, new girl."

"Nice to meet you, Jessie," Buffy said smiling.

"Buffy, this is Willow Rosenberg, also best friend and smarter than any five people in this sorry place put together," Xander said eliciting a blush and a smile from Willow.

"Nice to be formally introduced," Willow said still glowing at Xander's praise.

"Ditto," Buffy said.

Then Cordelia came up and asked, "Are these losers bothering you?"

"Oh we aren't hanging out with her," Willow started to say but Xander rolled his eyes.

"Yes, Willow we are. Buffy can pick her own friends just fine without Cordelia Chase's approval or permission," Xander said, keeping his voice flippant. She'd died in LA just the year before he was shot and the news had hit him harder than he thought it would. Yet, he needed to stay in type.

"Only if she wants to have a social life, Harris," Cordelia said.

"Funny, we were just being all kinds of sociable, until you showed up," Xander sniped back, surprised that it was this easy. I guess sniping at Cordy was one of those things you never forgot how to do, he thought to himself.

"Oh really, and are you going to take her home so your drunk deadbeat father can ineptly make a pass at her?" Cordelia said bringing out the long knives.

"Now that was uncalled for," Xander said dangerously, hurt. The last time she had been that mean was after the Fluke.

"Just the truth, just thought you'd like to know gym was canceled, I leave you to the black hole that will be your social life," Cordelia said walking away.

"I'm sorry Xander," Buffy said looking up at him.

"First time she ever threw that in my face, I must have really pissed her off."

"Jesse, why are you even trying with her when she says stuff like that?" Willow asked.

"Because Willow, Jesse can see the pure heart of goodness that is hidden in the Ice Queen's chest," Xander said, defending his friend.

"I wonder why gym was canceled?" Buffy asked.

"I dunno, but who's up for the Bronze tonight?"

---

Xander went into the Library to find Giles. As he got to the door he heard Buffy and him talking about her calling as the Slayer. He remembered the first time he'd heard this and heard the pain and longing in her voice to be able to lay it aside and not being able to because she was a hero and couldn't stand by. He closed his eyes and longed to hold her and take away her pain, but that wouldn't be possible today. He hung back and she stormed out of the library.

Xander then entered and sighed. Giles was still there looking annoyed. Xander cleared his throat.

"Yes, can I help you?" Giles asked.

"She gets better," he said, dropping all pretense of being a sixteen year old boy.

"What?" Giles said.

"I said she gets better. She steps up and deals with it. She always does and she always will," Xander said.

"Who are you?" Giles asked charging toward him.

"Xander Harris, sophomore at Sunnydale High currently. Two days ago and nine years in the future I was best friends with the Slayer, until I died." he said.

"Excuse me?"

"I need help, Giles. I'm scared and I'm not sure what I'm supposed to be doing, all Azriel told me was something is messing with my destiny and it's making things wrong. I've done one thing that can only help, but I'm not sure of what my next actions need to be," Xander said.

"Azriel? The Angel of Death?" Giles said.

"Yup, though I didn't know that until a mugger shot me, which tell me about ironic, I fight vampires and hell gods and the First Evil itself and only lose an eye in the process, but a desperate scared guy with a gun does me in," Xander said.

"What are you talking about?" Giles asked.

"I suppose I better start at the beginning, huh?" Xander said.

"I think that would help," Giles said.

"Well, it started about seven minutes ago for you, for me it's been nine years, I was sixteen and standing in the stacks back there, not even sure why I was there but now I think it was Providence…." Xander began. It took him fifteen minutes to lay out the last nine years to Giles, and then focusing on a bare bones description of his death.. The Watcher listened with rapt attention never interrupting Xander's tale until the end.

"And Miss Summers is still alive?" Giles asked, wonder in his voice.

"Yes, and do I need to tell you how WEIRD it is to hear you call her that?"

"I supposed it must be as weird an experience for you as this whole conversation has been for me," Giles said in a flippant tone.

"Touché," Xander said throwing a salute to the Watcher.

"So far you've kept to a factual accounting of what happened, but you haven't hit on the why yet," Giles said.

Xander winced, "I was hoping you'd miss that part as you are more her father than Hank has any right to claim."

"Are you two...involved?" Giles asked.

"No, if we were we wouldn't be having this conversation. There's going to be an Apocalypse in the future, future even for me. My and Buffy's children were supposed to be instrumental in stopping it, but they were never born," he said his voice low.

"I'm sorry," Giles said, wincing and misunderstanding WHY they were never born.

"Anyway, I need someone that I can talk to, which is why I decided to tell you," Xander said.

"I appreciate the vote of confidence," the older man said.

"Yeah, well there are going to be some strings to this, first Travers knows NOTHING of this. Second that stupid test on Buffy's 18th birthday isn't going to happen. You almost lost her in that fiasco and it took a long time for her to trust you again, I won't watch it happen again," Xander said, his tone low.

"I see…" Giles said, sounding like he was really believing this for the first time.

"I know I'm being a hardass here, Giles, but I don't want her hurt by anyone, least of all you. She loves you like a father and it really hurt her," Xander said.

"I feel as if I owe you an apology," Giles said.

"Nope, you haven't done it yet, and even if you had, it isn't me you'd need to apologize to," Xander said.

"So what are your plans?" Giles asked.

"So far, do what I did the first time, be there for her through thick and thin," Xander said.

---

That night Xander, Buffy, Willow and Jesse met at the Bronze.

"So this is the Bronze?" Buffy asked.

"Yes, it's not much, but it's not school," Xander said causing the group to chuckle.

"Thanks for inviting me. I think my Mom wanted me to stay in tonight until I said I was going with you. I think she likes you," Buffy said to Xander smiling.

"Sigh...it's a curse. I promise to let her down easy but I have my eye on someone else," Xander said, trying not to wince as Willow's face fell. He was glad that Buffy wasn't looking at her. Buffy just became radiant.

"There's Cordelia," Jesse said before Buffy could say anymore and started over to her but Xander caught his arm and swung him back around.

"Sorry buddy, but I can't let you flame out yet again. You need to take a break from trying to impress her," Xander said, seriously.

"Is this about what she said this afternoon?" Jesse asked, sympathically.

"Partly, but it's mostly about you Jess. I just hate to see you bang your head against a concrete wall all the time. She's either going to see you as someone worth attention or she's not, at this point you've made your case, she knows you are into her. It's time for her to make a move."

Xander realized that the girls were at the bar talking. So he gave his full attention to his friend. His very alive and not dusty friend, and he was determined to keep it that way, which was why he made sure to be armed tonight. Being Buffy's demonstration dummy back home had additional benefits beyond being pawed by his favorite slayer.

"I'll be back," he heard Buffy say to Willow.

"Anyway, just play the field awhile, you don't have to commit to one girl right now," Xander said.

"Really?" Jesse said sounding like the beginning of a Giles lecture on propriety.

"What?"

"Buffy," Jesse said with meaning.

"What does Buffy have to do with anything?"

"You've fallen hard for her, haven't you, bro?" Jesse asked, smiling.

"Don't be ridiculous," Xander protested, even though it was disturbing how quickly his friend picked up on that and started drinking his drink.

"Sure, so what's this about you and her having kids that save the world?" Jesse asked, conversationally, sipping his soda..

Xander spewed the mouth full of soda in shock, "No fair, only I'm allowed to eavesdrop on conversations in the library!"

"You weren't going to tell me, or Willow, you went to the OLD GUY?" Jesse asked, sounding hurt.

"That old guy is the only one I thought would believe me, besides I don't want to burden too many people with this," Xander said without realizing he was channeling Buffy.

"You planning on telling her?" Jesse asked.

"No, when...if it happens I want it to be because she wants it to, not because she feels obligated to," Xander said.

"You are SOOO into her!" Jesse said, grinning again.

"Yeah, I've loved her a long time, Jesse," Xander said seriously.

"And not ONCE?" Jesse asked, not wanting to believe it.

"Not with her, according to Azriel and the soul of my daughter though we were finally…"

"When you got shot. Man, hearing the hospital stuff, it made me cry. It's gotta be hard," Jesse said, sympathetically.

Xander put his arm around his friend and squeezed, "I have MISSED you man, of course I'll have to think of another name for Jesse now, since you'll be alive," Xander said, with a grin.

"This is too weird, man. Oh...look looks like Willow is coming out of her shell," Jesse said.

Xander looked at the guy she was dancing with and gulped, "Uh oh,"

"Huh?" Jesse asked confused.

"That's not a guy, it's a vampire," Xander said.

"How can you tell?" Jesse asked.

"I just can, it's a hazard of being best friends with the Slayer. Find Buffy, I'm going after Willow," Xander said.

Before Xander took two steps though he saw Buffy come down the stairs. He turned to Jesse and moved his head.

They followed Buffy toward the back entrance and saw her almost stake Cordelia. Xander and Jesse followed her out and he took out his stake and handed Jesse a cross.

"Here, this will keep them back," Xander said and went up to Buffy.

"You see her?" Xander asked.

"No, I'm worried," Buffy said.

"It's ok, Buff. We'll get her back safe. I know where they are going," Xander said heedless of the questions filing the Slayer's head right now.

"How?" Buffy asked.

"Trust me, please. Willow's my best friend and she is NOT dying tonight," Xander said.

Buffy looked at him and nodded and they took off in the darkness. They soon caught up to Willow and the vampire was practically dragging her along.

Xander hung a bit back from Buffy and said to Jesse, "When the fight starts, keep out of her way."

"Hey! Willow!" Buffy called out.

Willow turned and brightened when she saw Buffy.

"Hey, this is my friend, Buffy. I'm going to just...HEY!" Willow said when the vampire didn't let her go.

Buffy sprinted ahead and Xander and Jesse raced to keep up. She caught up to Willow and hit the vampire in the back forcing him to let Willow go. She then went to work.

Xander and Jesse helped Willow up. "You ok, Wills?" Xander asked, concerned.

"Yeah...Buffy we have to help her!" Willow said starting to go towards Buffy.

"No, we just need to watch her back, she's got this one," Xander said holding her back.

"Wow…" Jesse said watching the fight.

"Impressed with my girl's moves?" Xander asked Jesse as they watch Buffy give the vampire a pummeling. "Come on Buffy, dust this yahoo already."

"Huh?" Jesse asked.

"What is going on, Xander?" Willow asked.

"Long story, Will. Best served in the Library and in a British accent," Xander said then winced when Buffy lost her stake. Xander noticed a few things in her technique that she'd rip the mini slayers a new one for. Xander instinctively tossed her his calling out to her and she smiled and finally dusted the vamp.

"Yay! Good guys win again!" Xander crowed and Willow fainted.

---

The next morning in the Library, Xander, Jesse, Buffy, and Willow were listening to Giles and only Xander and Buffy seemed in the know on most of the information. After he completed his lecture, Willow and Jesse still looked lost, though Willow was more wigged than Jesse was.

"I think I need to sit down," Willow said, her voice weak.

"You are sitting," Buffy said, sympathetic.

"I'm not eating today...I think I'm going to be sick," Jesse said.

"So what's your deal, how'd you know where he was taking Willow?" Buffy asked, crossing her arms.

"Damn it…." Xander said.

"You might as well tell her since you've already used your unique situation to help," Giles said.

"Et tu, Giles?" Xander asked, causing Willow to faint.

"Willow!" Xander exclaimed going to his friend.

"I'm ok..just never knew you knew Shakespeare," she said, her voice weak.

"Ahem...It's either that or she beats you to a bloody pulp until you talk," Giles said conversationally.

"No, not bloody, just severely bruised," Buffy said sweetly.

"Ok, ok...I'm not ready to be your demonstration dummy just yet!" Xander said holding up his hands. "I'm from nine years in the future and you're one of my best friends. As a result I know about the future, 'cause it's my past," Xander said.

"Xander!" Willow shouted.

"Will, relax, it only happened on Sunday," Xander said.

"So when you were walking by the house…." Buffy said.

"I was actually walking aimlessly trying to think about what to do. In the coming years the me and Willow spend a lot of time at your house. It was instinct. In my past I didn't meet you until yesterday morning and was slightly less cool about it. As far as helping, I told the truth, what are friends for," Xander said.

"What about Jesse, why wasn't he…..he was dead, wasn't he?" Buffy said answering her own question.

"And you question how smart you are," Xander said.

"Everytime I hear I'm supposed to be dead, the weirder it seems," Jesse said.

"It gets weirder, buddy," Xander said with a smile.

"So what happens next?" Willow asked.

"I don't want to talk too much about the future, first, it's changing now, just with what I've done in the last two days. Second, I don't want any of you to feel like you have to do something just because you did in my past. Third, and this is the hard one-there's bad stuff coming, some of it I CAN'T prevent because it leads to better things," Xander said.

"Which means that you aren't going to talk about what our personal lives are like?" Willow asked.

"Would you really want to know, Willow?" Jesse said.

"No, I guess not. I guess in a way Jesse is in the best position of all of us 'cause his life isn't in Xander's head," Willow said.

"Willow, yours and Buffy's life isn't in my head either, just the way it went once," Xander said.

"I do have a question though, why?" Buffy asked.

"Why what, Buff?" Xander asked.

"Why are you here?" Buffy asked.

"You don't want that answered, Buffy," Giles asked.

"That's ominous," Buffy said.

"It's true, and PLEASE don't ask me to tell you the story," Xander said and put on puppy eyes.

"Why?" Buffy asked, her voice dropping in pitch.

"It's painful. It was the most emotionally wrenching experience I've ever gone through and that is saying something. I promise I will tell you someday, just not now. Besides, spoilers," Xander said.

"Ok...I trust you," Buffy said, sounding sympathetic at the obvious pain in his voice.

"Thank you, that means a lot," Xander said, closing his eyes.

"So we won?" Buffy asked.

"Huh?" Xander asked.

"Well we saved Willow and saved Jesse, right?"

"Oh...crap! We never got to mausoleum! You never fought Conan the Fangy!" Xander said, slapping his forehead[a].

"What's wrong?"

"The Harvest! It's tonight, the Master is going to try to rise unless we stop it."

"Harvest? That sounds bad. Does anyone mind if I pass out again?" Willow asked.

"Breathe," Buffy commanded her, and she did.

"Breathe," Willow told herself, and she looked less pale. Xander walked over to her, putting his hands on her shoulders.

She smiled up at him weakly. "It will be ok, Wills, I promise," he said low so that she was the only one who would hear. She patted his hand and returned her attention to Giles.

"How much do you know about the Harvest?" Giles asked.

"Only that Conan the Fangy was supposed to feed and somehow the power would transfer to the Master. They are doing it at the Bronze." Xander said, absently rubbing Willow's shoulders.

"How'd we find out originally?" Buffy asked looking a little jealous about the contact Willow was getting.

"When Willow and Jesse was taken they got to the Mausoleum," Xander said, stopping his impromptu massage to Willow's protests and moved over to Buffy and did the same for her as he continued. He needed both of his girls to talk about this. "Buffy and Conan fought. He surprised her. Don't know details but he talked about the Master rising. You and Willow did research while Buffy and I went after Jesse," Xander said.

"You came with me?" Buffy said, leaning into his touch.

"You didn't want me too, but Jesse's my bro. I wasn't about to leave him down there," Xander said and chuckled when Jesse faked being choked up.

"I didn't know you cared that much, man," Jesse said earning chuckles from the girls.

"I don't I was just trying to impress Buffy at the time," Xander said with a grin, both of them knowing he was kidding.

"Hah hah," Buffy said then whimpered when Xander removed his fingers and both girls looked at each other with knowing smiles.

"Anyway, we found Jesse but we were too late and it was a trap," Xander said.

"I take it we got away," Buffy said.

"Yup, first time I ever saved your life," Xander said, his tone serious.

"Sounds like you did a lot of that," Buffy said looking up at him.

"We both did, but last count you were ahead in getting my skinny ass out of trouble than vice versa," Xander said and Buffy smiled at him.

"So we can't do anything until sundown so I suggest we go to class and meet back here after school," Xander said.

"An excellent idea," Giles said.

Buffy looked up at Xander and asked, "Do we need anything special for our friend Conan the Fangy?"

"No, standard tools will suffice. I didn't see the fight, but you told me afterward that he wasn't too bright, might help," Xander said, looking up at the clock. "First period is in five minutes, though, so everyone needs to start heading for class."

Xander took the first book from the stack he'd given Giles.

"What about you?" Buffy asked.

"I have free period first period. I will go to class like a good boy," he reminded her.

"Oh, yeah, you told me that yesterday," Buffy said. "I have third period free, so I'll be back soon."

"Sixth for me," Willow said.

"Fourth," Jesse chimed in. "But we can all be here for lunch."

"Right then," Giles said, picking up a book. "Let's see what we have here."

---

It was lunch, and Willow had revealed her access to the sewer system map on the computer, and Xander had pinpointed the location on the map for everyone.

"Giles," Buffy started, "Isn't the Slayer supposed to be a one and only lonely kind of thing?"

"It is, traditionally," he said.

"Not anymore, you've got Scoobies now," Xander said grinning.

"Scoobies? Sounds itchy," Buffy said.

"As in Scooby Doo? We're the Scooby gang," Xander said.

"Were you Fred?" Buffy asked smiling at him.

"Are you kidding? I was Shaggy, Oz got to be Scooby," Xander said with nostalgic look on his face.

"Who's Oz and why was he Scooby?" Willow asked.

"Damnit," Xander said.

"What?" the girls asked.

"I have to be careful about mentioning people that aren't in the group yet," Xander said simply.

"Oh come on...just a little hint?" Buffy asked moving over to Xander who swallowed.

"Sorry Buff, but I've had nine years of being surrounded by beautiful women. While this would break mortal men, yip!" the last his voice cracked as she took his hand and looked up at him pouting.

"No fair no fair! Not the pout!" Xander said to guffaws from Willow and Jesse.

"Need I remind you that the end of the world is nigh?" Giles said.

"What the British man said!" Xander said sitting down and opening up a book. Buffy patted him on the shoulder.

"I had to try," she said, smiling at him.

"I understand you being curious," he said and his flustered attitude was dropped like a mask and Buffy frowned.

"I know," she said and sat down, and then turned to Xander, a business look on her face. "Ok, so you have some experience killing Vampires right?"

"Yeah," Xander said, "Nine years. I think that qualifies me for Slayer back up, but I'll need to get back into shape. I've gotten a bit flabby in my young age. So I'll be crowd control tonight."

Buffy nodded nervously, not wanting to think about what he'd look like in what he thought of as in shape, her knees were weak enough as it was.. "And we are going right after school?"

"Yup, after a brief stop at your house," Xander said.

"Supplies," she said nodding.

"Then when we get there Willow, Jesse, Giles and I will get everyone out while you deal with Conan," Xander said.

"That is a very sound plan," Giles said, sounding impressed.

"Thanks!" Xander said, sounding embarrassed.

"And Conan the Fangy will have this symbol on his forehead in blood?" Buffy asked, frowning the symbol on the whiteboard.

"Yes, he will," Giles said.

"This seems too easy," she said looking worried.

"Hey, relax, we won this one. You can do this," Xander said, putting his hand on her shoulder.

"You have so much faith in me," she said, her voice low.

"Of course I do, you're my hero, and you've never let me down," he said softly, forgetting himself and Buffy blushed. Then GIles cleared his throat.

"Lunch is almost over," he said.

Buffy looked at Xander and then smiled, "Thank you. I don't know if I could do this without you."

Xander smiled at her, "Sure you could, it just wouldn't be as much fun."

Then Willow ran out of the room.

"Uh oh," Buffy said and started after her. But Xander held her back, "I'll go. This is about me anyway."

---

"Willow! Wait!" Xander yelled and was glad that she stopped.
"I'm sorry Xander, but it just got to be too much," she said.

"I'm sorry," he said.

"I love you Xander, but you'll never feel the same and now that Buffy's here…" she trailed off and started crying. Xander put his arms around her.

"I love you Willow. You are one of the most important people in my life and the people you will date in the future, I'm proud to call them family," Xander said.

"You've changed a lot," she said.

"Not in the things that matter," Xander said.

"You love her don't you?" Willow asked.

"Yes, just like I love you," he said, stroking her hair.

"No, not like you love me. There's more there. And she feels it too, I can tell. That was why I had to get out of there," Willow said.

"Willow, Buffy doesn't feel that way about me," Xander said, unconsciously voicing what was true at this point in his memories.

"Then you are blind, Xander. Last night at the Bronze she asked if I was interested, and I told her I was, and she...she…" Tears overcame his redheaded friend. Xander held her as she cried. Then she found her voice, "She offered to back off, Xander. She put me before her obvious desire. At first I was stunned, but then I told her I want you to be happy. I was hoping to be the one to make you happy, but I can live with it being Buffy, she'll treat you the way you deserve."

"You two are the most amazing people I have ever known," Xander said, wiping the tears from his friend's face.

"Besides it could be a lot worse. I could have caught you making out with Cordelia," she said with a sad smile. Xander just coughed at what she said.

"What?" she asked.

"Nothing, nothing at all," Xander said.

---

Xander caught up with Buffy as she was going down the stairs out of the school and headed for her house. "Hey, Buffster," he said as she turned onto the sidewalk.

"Hey, how's Willow? I guess I got a bit carried away," she said, sounding a little down.

"She was fine enough to joke about catching me and Cordelia making out," Xander said.

"And how likely is that?" Buffy asked.

"About as good as you sleeping with a vampire," Xander deadpanned.

"That unlikely, huh?" Buffy said smiling a bit then the shadow returned.

"I know that look. It bodes no good. What's wrong, oh, Slayer above all Slayers?"

She frowned at him. "I didn't want to hurt Willow,"

He looked at her sympathetically. "She told me that you offered to back off."

"She did?" she asked, looking at him for his reaction.

"Yes, and according to her it was the most selfless thing anyone's ever done for her. I want to thank you for that," Xander said.

"You didn't know this?" she asked.

"No I didn't, if something similar happened between you the first time around neither of you told me," Xander said.

"I thought she was ok with it until she ran out," she said, sadly.

"She just needs time, Buffy. Trust me, she will find love and it will be magical for her. If I could speed it up I would, but I don't want to wreck things." he said, swallowing.

She looked up at him and touched his cheek, "That's good. She deserves it. So, what's eating at you?"

"What makes you think something is eating at me?"

"I can see it, whatever happened before you got sent back, it had to be hard," she said, gently stroking his cheek.

He closed his eyes, "You don't want to hear this, honest."

"Xander, you can't bottle this up, you need to talk to someone," she said.

"I have, Giles," he said.

"Someone you can cry around," she said, softly and she hugged him.

"I'll think about it, we don't have time right now," He said, returning the hug.

"Ok, I'll be here for you whenever you are ready," she said and kissed his cheek.

"Thanks, it helps," he said then cleared his throat, " I wish your Mom didn't have to stay with Dawn, we could use her help."

"Who's Dawn?"

"Your sis….SHIT!" Xander shouted.

"Xander...you kiss your mother with that mouth?" she said, teasing.

"Not if I can help it," he said, seriously and Buffy's expression darkened remembering Cordelia's shot about his home life.

"So who's Dawn?" she asked, obviously changing the subject.

"I shouldn't say," he said, sounding torn.

"But you're going to, aren't you?" she said giving him puppy eyes.

"Gah! Not the puppy eyes! Summers women and their puppy eyes, my personal kryptonite," Xander said causing Buffy to chuckle.

"Know a lot of Summers women?" she asked, playfully.

"Only three, your mother, you and...your sister," he said, the last two words resignedly.

"My WHAT?" she asked.

"You're sister," he said.

"Mom's going to get pregnant in the future?" Buffy asked, in shock.

"Not exactly," Xander said, deciding against teasing her about Giles being the father.

"Xander…." Buffy growled.

"It's complicated," Xander said.

"Tell me," she said, her voice getting dangerous.

Xander sighed, and said, "There is a ball of green energy, it's called The Key. It is capable of opening passages between dimensions, or break down those barriers completely."

"Sounds dangerous," Buffy said.

"Yeah, it almost ended the world, the Order of Diagon protected the key from a hellgod that was planning on using it to return home. Of course in the process she would've destroyed the world," Xander said, using his lecture voice.

"So what does this have to do with my yet-to-be-born sister?" Buffy said, causing Xander to chuckle a little.

"This isn't funny!" she said.

"I know it's not, not what I'm laughing at. You've always been protective of Dawn, sometimes a bit overprotective. I'm just glad to see it wasn't something the Monks whammied you with," he said, glad to have something to laugh about after the seriousness of the earlier part of the conversation.

"Oh...so what does this key thing have to do with her?"

"Everything. She IS the Key. The monks knew they couldn't protect it from Glory, so they sent it to the one person who could, the Slayer," Xander said.

"Still not getting what this has to do with my sister," Buffy said.

"When they did they wanted to ensure you would protect it, so they made it human. They created Dawn," he said.

"What about records and memories?" Buffy asked, confused.

"The spell was powerful. It changed our memories and all records and the world. Photos, recordings, right down to the tiniest detail. At your old house in LA you can see where you and Dawn signed your names in wet cocreate when the driveway was replaced," he said.

"That was before I was Called, how old was Dawn when the monks created her?" Buffy asked.

"Dunno, they could do it tomorrow or not for four more years. All I do know is that she was fourteen when everything with Glory happened," Xander said, wistfully.

"You miss her," she said.

"Yeah, I do. I have these memories of her being here and you'll see me instinctively tense up when I come over expecting a Dawn shaped cannonball to come flying at me," Xander said, smiling at the happy memories.

"Are you…" she asked.

"What?" Xander asked and Buffy waggled her eyebrows suggestive, "Oh...no. She's my sister just as much as she's yours. She's nineteen now and has been assigned her first Slayer," Xander said, caught up in memories.

"She's a Watcher?" Buffy asked.

"Yeah, you're proud of her, Buff," he said.

"But there can be only one, and you said I'm still alive," Buffy said.

"We changed the rules. Enough spoilers, we need to get going and since your mother doesn't have to watch Dawn after all I'm going to ask her to come," Xander said.

"No you aren't," Buffy said, her tone brokering no argument.

"Yes I am, Buffy. She finds out about you being the Slayer anyway and the first time it wasn't a pleasant way," Xander said.

"She tried to…" Buffy said.

"I know, but if she sees the truth, she'll believe. She did before," Xander said.

"I don't want to put her in danger," Buffy said.

"Buffy, she lives on the HELLMOUTH, she's already in danger. If she knows about the supernatural she can protect herself, and it'll make her relationship with you easier," Xander said.

"Fine, but I don't like it," she said.

"No, but you'll love it eventually," he said.

They arrived at Buffy's house shortly thereafter and Buffy and Xander went in. Xander stayed at the door while Buffy went upstairs.

"Xander!" Joyce said greeting him.

"Hi, Mrs. Summers," Xander said waving.

"Are you and Buffy going out?" she asked.

"Yes, we are, though its business rather than pleasure, unfortunately," Xander said.

"Business?" Joyce asked.

"Yeah, lives to save, vamps to dust. Home sweet Hellmouth. Buffy is upstairs getting her stuff," Xander said.

"Xander?" Joyce said.

"I'm sorry, its easy to forget you just got into town and don't know yet. We could actually use your help tonight, there's going to be a lot of scared folks and we could use the help with crowd control," Xander said.

"I don't believe I'm hearing this...and I was…" Joyce said stammering.

"Mrs. Summers, I know it sounds crazy, but its all true and a lot of people are going to die tonight if we don't act. Buffy needs your support. She's going to stop the Apocalypse tonight. Then if we aren't too tired we celebrate the world NOT ending," Xander said with a smile.

"You really believe this?" Joyce asked.

"Yes I do. Willow was taken by one of them last night. Buffy saved her. She is the one girl born into this generation with the strength, skill...yadda yadda yadda. It sounds better with a British accent," he said with a smirk.

"Who are you?" Joyce asked.

"I'm the same guy who helped you move in, Mrs. Summers. I had my eyes opened last night and I'm not going back to sleep. Too many lives are at stake. I wish you could stay unaware, but you're involved because of Buffy's status as the Slayer," Xander said and paused as Joyce gasped at the word.

"Ok, Xand. I think I've got enough for everyone to be safe…" Buffy said as she came down stairs with a bag, she was interrupted by her mother.

"Go back upstairs, Buffy," she said.

"Mom!" Buffy cried.

"She can't Mrs. Summers. Nothing would make me happier than if she could obey, but if she does the Master will rise and he will open the Hellmouth, then nothing much else matters," Xander said.

"Xander!" Buffy shouted.

"Buffy, I thought we agreed that this is for the best, that she needs to see it, in a reasonably controlled environment," Xander said to her then turned back to Joyce drawing from years of experience in dealing with parents of newly-called Slayers.

"You call the Harvest a controlled environment?" Buffy screamed.

"Compared to a lot of scenarios, yes I do. The vampires there will be there just to keep people from escaping; all the blood is meant for the Master, they won't kill and they won't feed. To do so will only make the Master mad and they don't want to do that," Xander said.

"No, no...I don't want her involved in this, I know I initally agreed to this insane idea, but I've changed my mind." Buffy said, her emotions getting the best

"Buffy, she needs to come," Xander said.

"NO! She's staying here where its safe," Buffy said.

"You always do this, as soon as things get dangerous you start pushing people away. I get it. You don't want to see any of us to get hurt, but guess what Buffy. We don't want to see you get hurt!"

"Its my job Xander!" she shouted.

"I know that! But that doesn't mean you have to go lone wolf all the time!" Xander said, both of them forgetting that the subject of the argument was standing right there in stunned silence.

"I AM a lone wolf. One girl in all the world, remember?" Buffy said.

"That's what the Council wants you to think. To them the Slayer is just a weapon, to be used and broken and replaced, but you aren't that to me. You're irreplaceable to me! Besides I made a promise to her. To keep you and Dawn safe and I will keep it!"

"How can you keep me safe when my job is going into battle?" she shouted.

"Buffy, you can kick the ass of any demon or hellgod on this planet. Physically, I'm not overly worried. Emotionally though? I've seen you go through horrible things and NOT once let anyone comfort you. You need that, you need your mother to know the REAL you. The you that takes the risks so the rest of the world can stay asleep. How can she BE your mother when she doesn't know what you are going through, what your nightmares REALLY are and why you wake up screaming at night. You deserve that, you cherished it once she found out the first time, not having to keep this from her, not having to make excuses for why you're out all hours and to be able to tell her WHY you need her to go when it REALLY is time for her to be out of the line of fire!" Xander paused to breathe.

"You'll keep her safe," she said, chagrined.

"I'll be watching out for her, I may not be in shape enough to back you up, but I can keep her safe," Xander said, he tone more the twenty-five-year-old Watcher he was than the sixteen-year-old boy he appeared to be.

"If she gets hurt, I will skin you alive," Buffy said.

"If she gets hurt, Buffy, I'll let you," Xander said and Joyce closed her eyes and rubbed the bridge of her nose as the fight wound down.

"You two fight like an old married couple," she said shaking her head and headed for the door leaving the two of them dumbfounded.. "Coming?"

---

They arrived at the Bronze ten minutes later and the sun was about to set. Giles was pacing as Buffy, Joyce and Xander came up to them.

"It's about time you got here, it's almost dark!" Giles admonished them then froze when he saw Joyce.

"Sorry, G-Man but I had to have a conversation with Mrs. Summers about Buffy, it took about as long as I thought it would because Buffy had to read me the riot act. Now Buffy has toys for us," Xander said as she began passing out crosses and holy water.

"Ok, Mom, Vampires can't stand crosses, the touch of one burns, but just holding it out from you will keep them away from you. This is Holy Water, don't use it unless you have to because I haven't gotten a supply I trust yet," Buffy said, still not sounding happy she was there.

"Father O'Reilly at St Mary's on Wilkerson. He's the real deal, Buffy," Xander said, his tone business.

"Thanks Xander," she said,. "Don't forget your promise."

"Never," he said seriously and kissed her hand, caught up in the moment. "Now let's save the world."

---

They separated to cover all of the exits so they could reopen them when needed. Xander stayed near Joyce. They were in an uncomfortable silence for a while. Then Joyce broke it.

"You said you made me a promise to look after Buffy and….Dawn?" she said.

Xander sighed and rubbed his eyes, he was going to have to stop slipping up on this. He sighed and nodded.

"Are you Buffy's husband?" she asked.

"No, we've never been romantically involved at all," he said.

"Surprising, you were all she talked about Sunday night. She's quite taken with you, which means I need to know something. Do you love her?" Joyce asked..

"More than my own life," he said.

"Then why didn't you get together?" Joyce asked.

"I used to think it was bad luck, but an angel tells me it was actually enemy action," Xander said.

"Come again?" she said.

"It's not important," Xander said.

"So your promise wasn't a promise made over wedding plans, so I assume it was made over my grave." Joyce said.

"No...don't ask this. Not this," Xander said.

"How?" she pressed.

"Joyce, please, don't make me talk about this," Xander said, his voice full of remembered pain.

"Ok...I won't press. You obviously think a lot of me to stand up to Buffy like that," Joyce said.

"We were close, all of us love you Joyce. In many ways you're more mine and Willow's mother than our own mothers are, especially after you found out. This way is better than the way I remember it," he said.

"So, I'm dead before you came back, and I have another daughter. I have to admit I'm loaded with questions."

"Yes, I know, and I can't promise to answer them all, but I will tell you everything Buffy knows….after we save the world," Xander said as the doors flew open admitting dozens of vampires.

---

After stopping the Harvest, Xander was on the phone with Jesse. He actually had to look up his friend's number in the phone book, which was embarrassing.

"So Buffy's Mom knows?" Jesse asked.

"Yes," Xander said.

"What does she think of it?" Jesse asked.

"This about what?" Xander asked.

"Being a grandmother?" Jesse said.

"I didn't tell her about that! I haven't had that many concussions yet," Xander said.

"Is Buffy still mad?" Jesse asked.

"She'll get over it. Her mom came through without a scratch," Xander said.

"She seemed over it the way she looked at you when they took you away," Jesse said.

"Well, that's good," Xander said.

"So did you have a lot of concussions the first time around?" Jesse asked.

"Seemed to happen about every other Tuesday," Xander said.

"What about dislocated shoulders?" Jesse asked.

"You are morbid, you know that?" Xander said.

"I'm curious, so if I get injured at some point do you think Cordelia would nurse me back to health?" Jesse said.

"If you saved her life, maybe," Xander said.

"But probably not, right?" Jesse said.

"Probably not. She isn't one for actual work, after all," Xander said.

"Bummer. Man, this is so weird vampires are real and your girlfriend fights them. It's a weird world," Jesse said.

"It gets weirder, and she's not my girlfriend," Xander said.

"Yet," Jesse said.

"Jesse…" Xander said warningly.

"Oh come on! You're Kyle Reese and she's Sarah Connor! It's perfect!"

"You watch too many movies," Xander said.

"Well I'm going to go, some of us actually have school in the morning," Jesse said.

"Night, bro. It's good to have you back," Xander said and hung up. He leaned his head back then heard a soft knock.

"Are you awake?" a familiar voice asked.

"Buffy? Visiting hours are over, aren't they?" Xander said.

"I snuck up, you weren't awake when they put you in here. I wanted to make sure you were ok," she said coming over to his bed.

"I'm fine, I've been hit harder than this, by you," Xander quipped then her face crumpled, "That was a joke."

"You were right, it IS nice to be able to talk about the Slayer stuff with my Mom. I was worried about you and it was nice that she KNEW what really happened," she said.

"I let you down, I promised to protect her and…" Xander began.

"You're not in shape yet, it's ok, you did your best, besides, she's not hurt. Not a scratch, which is more than the vampires can say," Buffy said.

"She's an incredible woman, Buffy," Xander said.

"Yes, she is. I forget that sometimes," Buffy said.

"How long are you staying?" Xander asked.

She breathed in keeping from crying, and said, "I still need to think about my feelings about you, but if you don't mind I'd like to stay all night."

"Won't be the first time," he said with a smile and she smiled at him and let the tears fall.