Chapter one: Pizza delivery service
It was eight o'clock in the morning. The school bell was ringing and pupils were running.
"We're too late! Hurry up!" Two girls with long blond hair ran upstairs and made quite desperate faces. Two pairs of blue eyes looked horrified as the bell ringing went on.
"This time we're really too late, Mina... arghhh!" The girl with two long plaits turned around the corner and crashed into another pupil. A schoolbag and several books fell down.
"Ouch!" The girl started to cry and blushed as she saw into surprised green eyes which went empty within the next second.
"Gomen..." the blonde collected her bag but was already pushed away by her best friend.
"You don't have time to apologize, Usagi. You can do that later - after the teacher has punished us for coming late again."
Both of them groaned loudly as they ran along the narrow corridor.
"And today is only Monday..."
Haruka shook her head and grabbed her crumbled books. But a small smile appeared on her pale, tired face, nontheless.
They're always too late.
She opened the door but still had to look at a now empty corridor.
Well, at last they seem to carry the punishment together - like real friends...
Haruka's smile faded as she saw how her classmates ran excitedly through the class room. There was no teacher there and the tall girl knew that it was easier to listen to her teacher's strict words that she was too late than spending one break with her stupid fellows.
"Hey, our freak finally arrived!"
Haruka ignored them while she walked over to her place. She sat alone there in the corner. Next to the window which was open in summer. She liked to look outside into the sunshine and to feel the warm wind playing with her short hair whenever they had boring Japanese or English lessons. For only a few seconds she could dream of a better life. Of nicer fellow students. Of spreading her wings and simply flying away. Forever...
But today was autumn. The leaves were falling outside and the wind was rough and cold. The window was closed – and would stay this way for the next months.
The chair next to her was empty. It was the last empty one in the entire class. All other pupils had her or his best friend sitting next to them. Haruka had no one. She always sat in her corner, just like in a castle surrounded by roses.
Like the sleeping beauty.
Haruka sighed slightly.
But I am not a sleeping beauty.
Sometimes it was hard to sit alone. Especially in physics when they had experiments to do and she had no partner - and of course no one wanted to join her team. But most of the time she was grateful . Because this way she had her peace at least during the lessons.
"Did you learn for the English test?"
"Surely she didn't!"
"Hai, all she's able is to run!"
"Strange school, to keep such a bad pupil."
"Hai..."
She didn't listen to them any longer. She knew that it was senseless to argue with them. Their parents were rich, she was poor. And to beat them down... they were silly girls. Nothing more. Their words had stopped to hurt her a long time ago. Nothing could touch her any longer. Could really hurt her.
I don't need them.
Haruka sat down and put her books on her table. Slowly, she opened a crumbled newspaper to read it.
They aren't important.
The tall girl frowned and played nervously with her pen while she turned the page.
It's more important to get a part time job to pay the rent.
Her stomach grumbled silently and she tried to calm it down that it already had an apple she stole from some tree on her way to school.
And to have some money to get something to eat.
She didn't want to think that winter was approaching and that she had no jacket. Nor boots. Only her old, ugly pullover. And her school uniform...
Another ten minutes passed by while she underlined some shops she could ask to help out.
As long as I don't have to cook.
At that moment the door was opened and the teacher entered the room. Suddenly, all pupils were very silent and sat down as fast as possible. Curiously, they looked at the door - because their teacher wasn't alone today.
"Konnichiwa." Said the old woman and pulled a girl with her who obviously preferred to be somewhere else. Somewhere else - but certainly not standing in front of the class and facing several interesting looking boys and girls.
They all look like tigers.
Or snakes...
Michiru took a deep breath and kneaded the books in her hands tighter. Silently, she observed the different pupils, all watching her with big eyes. As if she were the eighth world wonder.
I hate that feeling.
Just one girl kept staring into a newspaper. Some strands of short blond hair feel into dark green eyes.
My girl...
"Boys and girls, this is your new classmate, Kaioh Michiru who..."
But Michiru didn't listen to her any longer. She only stared at the girl she had seen in a cold night. On an empty bridge. In a dark life. A girl who held her tight and gave her the comfort and the power she needed in that icy night to carry on.
There was something special about this girl. Not only that she didn't use make up or that she preferred to wear the boy's uniform.
No wonder I confused her with a boy at first.
Again she felt soft breasts under and old pullover.
Although she's indeed a woman.
The uniform was different from the ones the boys wore. The short white shirt wasn't put into the long pants. The sleeves of the jacket were ripped off and now it looked more like a waist coat.
She looks wild now. Untouchable. Unreachable.
Michiru frowned and held her books tighter in her suddenly ice cold hands.
Nevertheless, she stoke my hair so softly.
There was indeed something special about this girl. While all the other pupils stared at the new girl, did she only read in her newspaper and seemed to be in another world. In a dream only she knew.
Some rays of sunlight broke through the cloudy sky and shone through the window. To lighten up the place the tall girl sat at. Only her place. All the other were kept in darkness.
She sits there all alone.
Michiru frowned as she recognized that the other tables stood a little bit farer away from her table then to the neighbour's one.
She looks alone. Strong and unbreakable. But nevertheless, she looks alone.
The sea green haired girl bit on her lower lip.
Just like me...
"... and she moved to the inner city of Tokyo after her parents' sudden death. Now she will learn with us and have good grades."
Typical teachers. Only talking about good grades!
Haruka shook slightly her head and underlined another advertising that sounded okay.
Maybe I can work in a pizza service? Or clean windows? Or wash cars?
Michiru blinked as she realized that it was her turn to speak now.
Sudden death.
She swallowed hard.
That's one way to call it, although it wasn't that sudden - if I hadn't been that blind...
"I..."
"Are you really Kaioh Michiru?"
"I have your CD."
"Hai, it is great!"
"I like the modern music with the lyrics, although my mother prefers the classic songs."
Michiru smiled nervously, not knowing, what to answer.
They listened to my music?
The see green haired girl chewed again on her lower lip.
Did they understand it?
"Although I don't like the song about the whales. It's too much kitsch!"
No, they didn't.
"Your father was Kaioh Gendo, wasn't he? The famous piano player."
"I've read about the accident in the newspaper."
"Nasty thing..."
So they spoke on and Michiru took a deep breath. Not knowing how to interrupt them. Not knowing how to stop them. Not knowing how to hold back the tears suddenly burning in her eyes.
That's my private life. They shouldn't talk about it. It's not their problem and it's certainly not their right to talk about it.
But she knew that they were written in all newspapers. All bloody details.
No, not all details.
At least the doctors kept silent.
Hopefully forever...
"Hai..." she answered silently and swallowed hard. Wondering how long she would be able to stand in front of the class without breaking down in tears.
Hai...
The soft voice brought her back from her personal concerns. Haruka put the newspaper down and looked directly into deep blue eyes. Tears shimmered in the sunlight shinning though the window. A smile froze on a pale face and small fingers grabbed some books tighter.
"The newspapers said that it was maybe the rain and the street had been..."
"Hai..."
Sea green hair fell over shaking shoulders as the girl stared on her white boots. She was wearing the normal school uniform, but her blue skirt almost reached her feet. She decided for a long one that could hold her warmer - because Haruka knew with a sudden that the girl had to freeze a lot.
Like me...
"And then..."
Haruka shook her head in disbelieve. Didn't they see how much they tortured that girl with their stupid questions? With their ignorance? With their silly behaviour?
"But the TV..."
Certainly not!
Again Haruka felt the shaking body in her strong arms. Heard the desperate sobs. Saw tears running over pale cheeks.
She cried as if the world was going to end...
"Okay, that's enough now! Shut up and leave her alone with your stupid question! They're hurting!"
Haruka didn't notice that she had stood up. Nor did she notice her clenched fists. All she saw were deep blue eyes looking thankfully up to her.
"Oh, shut up, you freak. What do you know about feelings! You're..."
"Do you like it to answer questions about your parents' divorce?" snapped Haruka back without taking her eyes off the trembling girl.
"You bloody..."
A girl with long, blue hairs narrowed her eyes and a hateful expression appeared on her face.
"You bloody bastard!"
"You dyke!"
"You devil!"
"You lazy bitch!"
Suddenly, more angry voices shouted loudly at Haruka, but all the tall girl noticed was a shy smile under sparkling tears. Automatically, she smiled back.
"You bloody lesbian!"
Haruka winced as the scream flashed thought the class room. Some pupils laughed wickedly while the teacher tried to calm them down - in vain.
The new girl frowned - and turned away.
Fantastic.
Haruka groaned silently. Then she took a deep breath and sat back again to look straight into her newspaper.
Arigato, Mila. Now you've got another member in your How can I make other pupil's life to hell club without letting me the chance to talk to her!
However, Haruka knew that it was all senseless. After they got to know Mila most of the pupils didn't want to talk to the tomboy with the strange uniform and the bad grades any longer.
And the ones who still wanted to were too shy or simply too afraid of Mila and her influence in class.
Hell, I am used to their behaviour.
She got used to it the day two years ago when she decided that it was better for her to look like boy. When she started to hate all people. When she tried to creep back into her own world - but no one really let her.
I am used to it.
But suddenly she was sad of losing the sea beauty before really meeting her.
Why did she cry? Because she's lost her parents?
Now she wouldn't get an answer. Certainly!
"May I sit down?" asked Michiru and gave the blue haired girl in the first array a long, thoughtful look. Then she stared pleadingly up to the old teacher.
"Good, Michiru. You can talk to your new fellows later in the break. Please be kind to your new fellow student and show her everything in the break, for example our cafeteria and where she can sign up for our great clubs. Guess you'll go to the orchestra." The old teacher smiled friendly and Michiru liked her at the moment. Maybe she wasn't powerful enough to calm the exciting pupils down, but she looked understanding. Suddenly Michiru was reminded of her long dead granny.
"You can sit down behind Yakoto. There's still one place left. Hope it's okay for you to sit so far away from the blackboard."
"Oh, don't worry. I have good eyes." Automatically, Michiru smiled back and the tears disappeared from her eyes.
"Next to the Tenô-dyke? That can't be your seriousness!" said Mila angrily and some other girls looked with pity at their new fellow student.
"Maybe we can steal another bank from room 5a just over the corridor."
"Or she'll take the seat and comes to us. We have enough room here." Shouted another girl with short black hair and waved excitedly her hands.
But Michiru didn't care about them any longer. She took her books tighter into her hands and went over to the last table standing in the bright sunlight next to a huge window.
"You shouldn't sit there, Michiru. Just talk to the teacher. Maybe you'll get another seat."
"She's not good enough for you!"
"She's a freak."
"She has no manners."
"She doesn't like other people."
Why should she comfort me when she don't like other people?
Michiru ignored the loud voices around her as she stepped next to the still reading girl. Or at least to the tall girl who was pretending to study the death announces.
"Is the seat still free?" she asked while she teacher wrote something on the huge, blackboard in front of the class. She shouted once or twice at the pupils to be quiet but gave up as she failed. Therefore, she concentrated again on her lesson and prepared herself to read out loud from an old book.
"Today we'll start to talk about Shakespeare." She declared in a loud, determined voice and finally some people turned around to follow her lesson. But other, still curious eyes observed how the tall girl slowly raised her head and nodded in silence.
Michiru put her books down and sat next to the girl.
"Hello, I am Kaioh Michiru." She smiled and shook and icy hand. Almost as icy as her own one. Her voice was shaky but she knew she could face all those stupid questions as long as this girl was by her side.
Although she didn't know why.
"Tenô Haruka."
Deep blue eyes looked for a long time into dark green ones while their hands gently squeezed.
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"You have to come in our orchestra! Your CDs are so great and with such a famous father you surely play your instrument perfectly."
"It was the piano, too, wasn't it?"
"No, I play the violin."
Michiru smiled into different excited faces around her in the school's cafeteria. They all sat around the table and ate their bentos. There was no place left and it seemed as if all girls of her class tried to sit at her table.
All pupils were very curious and all wanted to be friend with the nice, beautiful and rich girl.
"Violin. Such a nice instrument. Our orchestra needs..."
Michiru nodded and bit in her sandwich. Her blue eyes still searched the huge room. But she couldn't find the tall girl with messed blond hair anywhere.
"Last year we gave a huge concert and it was great, really, but we need a violin. Our last violinist who could really play left our school four years ago and since then..."
Where is she? Doesn't she join the other pupils to eat her lunch?
You bloody lesbian!
Again Michiru heard the mean, rude voices in her head and chewed thoughtfully.
Certainly, she doesn't want to join them.
The sea green haired girl remembered how Haruka's stomach had growled slightly during the English lessons, although she tried to hide it.
Does she have anything to eat?
"But you should sit somewhere else. That Tenô girl isn't good enough for such a nice girl like you."
Michiru frowned as she returned from her concerned thoughts. She turned around and faced Yakoto. A small, friendly girl with shoulder long red hair and freckles.
"She's always shouting at people and she only cares about herself."
"Hai, she walks around like a ghost." Said another girl Michiru didn't know her name yet. But she seemed to be Yakoto's best friend.
"She has very bad grades and all she's able is to run. And to shout at people."
Michiru frowned and suddenly felt those soft arms again around her waist. Rocking her comfortingly. Calmingly. Almost tenderly.
Strange...
Again she heard all the angry voices shouting at the tall girl who had only tried to defend her.
To defend me. Someone she hardly knows...
"Did she ever shout at you?" asked Michiru and put her sandwich away. Suddenly, she wasn't hungry any longer.
"No..." Yakoto's dark blue eyes were suddenly full of tears. "Not directly. Not at me, but..."
"But look at her clothes. She dresses like a man and certainly she's a freak."
That was Mila and Michiru took a deep breath.
You're repeating yourself!
She knew girls like these from her former school where she had been the famous, rich, spoiled brat. Such pupils never changed their minds - no matter how long and hard you discussed this topic with them. You couldn't convince them. Not with arguments. Not with fights. With nothing.
It was better to let them in peace and to live one's own life.
"So where can I sign up for the orchestra?" asked Michiru instead and changed the whole topic. Suddenly, she was very determined to search Haruka after school would be over for the day.
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The Italian restaurant opens at six in the evening. They pay a little bit more per hour than the newspaper delivering service. And I don't have to deliver the pizza so early in the morning.
Haruka yawned while she turned the page.
Two weeks for the rent, the rest of the month's pay must be enough for food and clothes.
Slightly, she shivered in her school uniform and wished to have her pullover. But it had been dirty and it always needed a long time to get dry again after she washed it. The heating was broken in her room and she didn't know how to repair it.
It will be very tight, but it might work.
Haruka frowned as she tried again to concentrate on the words in the old book. But they simply danced around in her mind and she couldn't concentrate.
She bit in her apple and chewed slowly. It was her dinner because she wanted to save the little money she had for bad times.
Worse than these times?
"English?"
She winced wildly and almost lost her apple as she heard the soft voice above her. She raised her head and looked directly into shinning blue eyes.
They look so much happier now.
Haruka blinked in confusion.
Surely she found a lot of new friends today.
The tall girl frowned as the sea green beauty sat down beside her under the huge tree on the cold ground. The grass was still green but dusk was near and it got wet.
What does she still want from me? Didn't Mila convince her that I am a freak she should better leave in peace? Or is that a trap?
Quickly, she looked around. But there were no other people around. Only a still smiling Michiru.
"English vocabulary?" asked Michiru again and looked over Haruka's shoulder right into the old, crumbled book that seemed to have served many other pupils before the tall girl.
Is she cold?
Michiru wore her white coat now. Haruka still only her school uniform. Her arms were naked and the smaller girl could see the goose flesh.
"Hai, for tomorrow's test. There won't be new pupils every day giving me some more time to learn."
Michiru nodded and leaned closer to the tall girl.
Does she really know what she's doing? To sit here together with a freak like me?
Haruka frowned but didn't turn away. The warm body next to her felt so damn good that she would have done anything just to experience that gentle, probably unconscious touch.
Hope she doesn't hear my heartbeat.
Haruka swallowed hard as she felt Michiru's warm breath on her cheek.
"But that vocabulary isn't so hard to learn." Said Michiru and heard Haruka's dry laughter.
"Shall I help you?"
Nani?
Startled green eyes blinked and Haruka ran a trembling hand through her short blond hair. Again she looked quickly around. But there was no Mila hiding behind the bushes. And Michiru smiled too friendly to let this be just a bad joke.
"Shall I help you?" repeated the smaller girl and stroked some strands of her sea green hair behind her ears. Haruka watched her in fascination and had suddenly the strange desire to stroke though those soft looking curls, too.
Just once. To see if they really feel like velvet.
"There're some tricks to remember them easier."
Still Haruka watched her in silence. Looked at a now smiling face. Redden cheeks. Shinning blue eyes. Wind played with sea green hair and they danced over small shoulders.
She's so beautiful.
Haruka blinked. She couldn't remember the last time someone smiled at her. The last time someone offered her one's help. The last time someone seemed to care for her.
"Hey, don't worry. I am a good teacher. My niece always says that no one can explain math to her like I do."
You bloody lesbian!
"Are you sure?" asked Haruka and saw again all those hateful looks. Saw again her hysterical mother before her eyes. When she shouted at her, threw her out of her home. After she had shot her puppy.
Are you sure that you want to be a friend of a dyke like me?
"Oh, don't worry, I know that I am a good teacher." Answered Michiru, although she knew what the taller girl had meant.
She took the book in her hands and started to explain. Soon they both were so occupied with the vocabulary that they didn't notice how some pupil went by. Stopping for some moments and pointing over to them. Going away with shaking heads. There was a tall boy among those pupils and he looked very determined when he went back into the school building.
They didn't notice how the sun started to set nor did they hear the school bell ringing for the last time of this day. Now even the last clubs were over and they all had to leave the school before it was closed.
"Oh, already six." Whispered Michiru as she took away the book and looked at her watch. "Well, I guess you know enough now to get a good mark, my English genius." Smiled Michiru and slowly came to her feet. She froze and her whole body trembled as she took her school bag again.
Doesn't she freeze, too?
Silently, she observed how Haruka took her books again in her hands and stood up, too.
"I live now in the Ukaido area." The sea beauty searched for her gloves and pulled them over her white fingers. Haruka watched her temptingly.
Ukaido. That's the noblest area of Tokyo.
"Still I don't know how to get there. I used to live in the outer area of Tokyo and I am still helpless with all the subways and the busses. My father used to take me to school but now..." For a short moment Michiru looked really sad. Alone. Lost.
I want to go to her and embrace her again. To rock her again. To comfort her again.
But instead Haruka held her books tighter and swallowed hard.
"Each time I try to get a taxi no one sees me and they all drive away." Now Michiru giggled, but it still sounded very sad. "Would you please be so nice to show me the way? Just if you go in the same direction. It would be great. Otherwise, I'll see if I'll get a taxi or if someone can give me his map."
Haruka nodded.
"Of course I can show you the way."
What are your talking, you baka! You live in the opposite direction and it's six o'clock now. You wanted to go to the Italian restaurant and ask for work. Don't you remember?
Of course she did remember. But to go for a short time with someone who really wanted to talk to her, who didn't wince away, who wouldn't shout and throw things at her - that sounded simply too good.
"Arigato." Michiru bowed slightly before her and Haruka felt how she blushed.
Can't remember the last time I blushed.
Haruka shivered slightly as cold wind blew through her short hair.
Can't remember the last time I didn't feel that alone...
"Okay, then let's go. Before it's dark and you can't keep the streets we're going along in mind." Haruka walked away and Michiru followed her.
"Oh, I can remember a place when I've been to it once." She said and searched for a scarf in her schoolbag to wrap it around her neck.
Haruka watched her for some moments in silence. A smaller girl in a thick white coat. With white gloves and a red scarf.
She looks so fragile...
Suddenly Haruka had the strange desire to protect the sea beauty next to her - without knowing why. The past had showed her too well that all people were ignorant. That it was better to take care for oneself - because there was no other one who would take care of her instead. Everyone was alone. Only responsible for oneself.
I shouldn't trust her that much. If I do it's too easy for her to hurt me.
That was the reason why Haruka had established thick walls around her heart. Around her mind. Around her whole being. And Kaioh Michiru came in the middle of the night in an empty subway and all those strong walls seemed to fall apart.
I shouldn't trust her.
But for some reason Haruka already knew she did.
"And this is the emperor's street. If you turn left you see a small park. Often you can hear the duckies pleading for bread." Explained the tall girl and simply ignored her inner voice.
Michiru next to her nodded and declared laughingly that she would have to take some bread with her to feed them the next time.
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"Look at those nice flowers!"
They just passed a flower shop and suddenly Haruka was holding Michiru's schoolbag in her arms and tried to balance it together with her books.
"They're beautiful." Shouted Michiru and leaned closer to the white veils to enjoy the sweet scent. "Guess I have to buy them." She giggled and searched in her coat for some money.
"White roses?" asked Haruka and frowned as she read the price.
They're very expensive.
Her eyes grew wide as she saw the big note in Michiru's hand. It was crumbled and it seemed to be less money for the sea green haired girl. For Haruka it was a fortune.
"Hai, they're the most beautiful flowers. My mother loved them and everyday we had at least one single rose on our living room table. I used to draw them a lot." Michiru's smile was again sad. Sad and tenderly.
She must have loved her parents a lot.
Haruka held the bag tighter in her hands and watched how Michiru collected all those flowers and paid them to a smiling young woman. She gave a tip that would have been enough for Haruka to get enough food to survive another long, hard day.
"Look!" Michiru held the big bunch in her arms and a happy smile laid on her normally so pale face. The cheeks were redden and the lamplight's light let her hair sparkle. Some drops in white pedals looked like diamonds and shone in all colours of the rainbow.
Jut like an angel...
"My uncle will like them and my niece, too." Michiru giggled and they walked again along the road. "You must know that my niece can be a real devil. If she wants to she can be wild and loud. But she can be calm and nice, too. I like her a lot."
I wish I had such a family.
Haruka followed her in silence and watched how the smaller girl stopped sfor ome times and enjoyed again the roses' sweet perfume.
"After my parents' death I moved to my uncle. He's a nice man, although he works too much. Often my niece is already in bed when he returns home." Now Michiru was the one guiding them, although she had no idea where she was. Haruka told her time by time when she was about to take the wrong road.
I had nowhere to go after my mother didn't want me any longer.
Haruka held the bag and the books tighter and they almost fell down.
"Oh, is it very heavy?" Suddenly, Michiru stopped and Haruka almost crashed into her. They reached a park and they both could hear the rushes of the leaves above. They reminded them of an endless, unsteady ocean. Wild waves being touched by an independent wind.
"It's... it's okay." Whispered Haruka and winced as Michiru took her schoolbag again and they hands shortly touched.
"Gomen, Haruka. That's my temper. When I see something that's really interesting I forget everything around me."
Don't worry. You aren't keen to get to know my temper.
"No problem." Haruka grabbed her books tighter, still feeling the soft fingers on her cold skin. Michiru raised her head and looked directly into dark green eyes. Mysteriously sparkling ones.
I want to know more about you.
But she wasn't sure if she'd get any answers when she'd ask. Because Haruka didn't look as if she would talk so easily about her life as Michiru did.
Please, let me be your friend.
Haruka sighed slightly. She didn't dare to ask aloud, because there had been so many people who refused her. Who said no and turned away to leave her - forever.
Because I can't stand it again to be left alone.
"Haruka?" Michiru frowned and put the bag down. With her now free hand she took Haruka's and held it determinedly tight as the tall girl wanted to step away. "Everything okay?" she asked but didn't expect an answer. Haruka kept silent and couldn't do anything else than watching her with her dark green eyes.
"You can tell me, Haruka. I've seen so many pain during the last months, I understand a lot." Michiru smiled openly, but suddenly tears sparkled in her deep blue eyes.
She knows how it is to lose parents she loved. But she doesn't know how it is to never have been loved by them. Simply kicked out. She certainly doesn't know how it is to have lived in hell for over so many years.
Haruka swallowed hard as the small hand squeezed her ones gently.
Certainly, she doesn't know how it is to be a freak.
But somehow Haruka wanted to tell her all her problems. To trust her.
And to be betrayed again? Forget it!
"Are you cold? You are trembling." Said Michiru and searched in Haruka's face. But all she found was emptiness. Therefore, she let go of the hands and saw shortly regret and disappointment flashing in dark green eyes. Michiru frowned and took her scarf to pull it around Haruka's neck.
"Better you'll take your jacket to school the next day. Summer's already over and soon it'll start to snow."
What jacket?
But Haruka nodded and felt the soft scarf around her neck.
Velvet?
It must have been expensive. This is a gift too big for me.
"I can't..."
"Oh, just take it. I have enough scarves. I freeze all winter and so I got one almost every Christmas."
Christmas...
Suddenly, Haruka's expression was very shocked.
How shall I spent Christmas in this room? All alone...
Michiru saw it and automatically raised her hand to touch the pale cheeks. To stroke over soft skin and to ask so long until she got at least one satisfying answer.
"Hey, you dyke! Did you find a new victim!" The rude voices pushed them suddenly out of their world of silence. The rushes of the waves seemed to die away and all that remained was the roaring of the engines. Three or four motorbikes circled over the road next to them and the men laughed madly.
"You bloody lesbian! Leave our nice city!"
"Just do us the favour and die!"
"And let innocent girls like her in peace!"
"Dyke!"
"Bitch!"
"Whore!"
"Lesbian!"
Again they laughed and the engines roared even louder. They threw something at them but Haruka didn't even wince away as the empty bottle of bear missed her head for only a few inches and crashed on the ground next to her.
"Assholes..." she whispered silently with such an insensible voice that it made Michiru shiver.
The men laughed again and turned around. Their engines could be heard overall in the rich neighbourhood as they finally drove away.
Michiru's eyes grew wider as she watched them go and shocked she took her bag again in her trembling hands.
"Tokyo seems to be a very nice city. Didn't know that." She said with a shaky voice. Not able to look over to Haruka again. Into her sparkling eyes.
What shall I do now?
Michiru lowered her head and watched her flowers again. Suddenly, she wasn't happy any longer. Suddenly, she was only sad and confused.
Is she really a lesbian?
The sea green haired girl sighed deeply.
And what if she were?
"Ukaido is at the end of this park. Just cross it and you'll be home." Haruka's voice was very low and Michiru winced slightly as she heard the bitter cold in it. "It's already seven and I have other things to do."
Haruka held her books tighter in her icy hands and sighed deeply as Michiru didn't look up.
That was it. Certainly she's afraid of me now. Or she thinks that I am disgusting. I wanted to be her friend and now I lost her. Maybe it's my destiny to be all alone...
"Better I'll go now." Haruka swallowed hard as Michiru didn't react. "See you tomorrow at school." If you didn't find another place to sit down in class.
With those words she turned away and walked some steps. Suddenly her heart hurt and tears burned in her eyes. Her steps got faster and as she reached the corner she broke into a run. She shut her eyes and simply ran until she was out of breath. Cold wind played with her hair and she wished to be as fast like the wild nature's element. To be able to escape this hell. All this pain. All those bloody people. To leave them behind and to start a new, a better life.
I didn't want to lose her...
Michiru raised her head and saw how the tall girl ran away. As if she was hunted by bloodhounds.
"Haruka?" she whispered but knew that the other one couldn't hear her any longer.
Please, don't go.
But she was already alone in the entrance of the park. She let go her bag and the flowers and they hit the ground with a quiet noise. Michiru wrapped her arms around her shaking body and some tears ran over her pale cheeks.
Suddenly she felt alone again.
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Hell, I am so tired.
Michiru made a face as she saw her pale reflection in the mirror. Slowly, she ran a hand through her sea green curls and showed herself her tongue.
Again that silly nightmare...
Michiru swallowed hard and tears sparkled again in her already redden eyes. She had had one nightmare after another all night and more than once she woke up screaming. She was very grateful that she didn't wake up her niece. The small girl was so quickly concerned about her always sad looking auntie.
Even the hot shower in the morning couldn't calm her down.
Then they had the first hour. Japanese poetry. Haruka didn't greet her when she sat down and it was very hard for her not to break down sobbing as they talked the entire lesson over a poem a Japanese soldier wrote during the war to his parents at home. Not knowing that he would die the same day.
I don't want to go back.
Half of the class didn't listen and the growling of Haruka's stomach was driving her crazy. Then there was the English test, but she simply couldn't concentrate and Haruka tried more than once to look at her blank sheet.
We've learned over two hours yesterday. Did she forget everything?
Michiru's eyes filled with tears as she remembered again those cruel nightmares. Knowing that they all were all too real.
Mommy...
Daddy...
She sobbed quietly and tried hard to seize on the washbasin. Hot tears ran over her pale cheeks and suddenly she felt very sick. Her stomach hurt and her whole body started to tremble.
Why did you leave me?
Again she saw the cruel pictures in her mind. All the pictures they had shown on TV. In all newspapers. Some reporters even tried to interview her, but her uncle showed them determinedly the door and didn't let anyone getting closer to her again.
Those cruel pictures...
Of a smashed Ferrari. A silver one. Her father's dream. He used to drive it before his doctors declared that his medicine was too strong to let him drive any longer. Therefore, her mother learned to drive the fast car. A wonderful car.
They left the bending road and drove right over a cliff. There had been no traces of any brakes. Only a wrack down near the waves. With two bodies in it.
Why...?
Michiru sobbed even louder and closed her eyes as she heard the school bell ringing for the next lessons. Modern art.
I am not in the mood to take part.
The sea green haired girl sobbed quietly as she reeled over to the cabins. She locked herself in one and sat down on the closed toilet. Slowly, she brought her legs to her body and wrapped her arms around her knees. Tears sparkled in her deep blue eyes as she stared blankly at the white door. Some words were written down there. Certainly by silly pupils. But she didn't see them. All she saw was a beautiful woman and a lovingly smiling man. And a police man with his cap in his hands who had to tell her that they were dead.
No...
Why...
"You damn freak..."
The door was pushed open and someone slammed it loudly behind herself. Immediately, the voices died away and all that remained as silence. A strange silence. A wrong silence. A silence that should be filled with loud screams.
I hate them. I hate them all!
Haruka threw her black, old schoolbag in the corner and clenched her fists. Shortly, she looked into the mirror to see an angry, tired face. She hadn't sleep at all last night and still waited impatiently for the answer of the Italian restaurant.
What if they don't want me?
She didn't want to wash cars all day long. Not when the weather was getting colder and colder and she would have to wash them outside - with cold water.
Then I'll get a flu or something worse and I don't have the money to go to a doctor.
She sighed deeply as she turned away from her reflection. Today she had worn her pullover over her uniform and the teacher told her that she wasn't allowed to wear it inside the building. So she had put it away - grateful that the teacher didn't take it away from her. But as a consequence she had been cold all day. And now she was also hungry. This morning she couldn't reach an apple and she simply wanted to save her money than to waste it on expensive rolls. Of course Michiru didn't greet her in the morning. The girl simply sat down, opened her book and stared with a tired expression at the words.
The entire English lessons she didn't write anything down.
Haruka who knew some answers wanted to help her, but Michiru simply didn't react each time she wanted her to show her her answers.
Maybe they aren't all right, but better to have something on the paper than to give a blank one to the teacher.
You bloody lesbian!
Again she heard the rude voices inside her head. Again she saw how Michiru simply stared in her flowers after the rude men disappeared on their motorbikes. Again she saw how the sea beauty came into class this morning and greeted everyone - except her.
See it, she doesn't want to be the friend of a freak.
Haruka took a deep breath and kicked the doors of the cabins. They slammed against the walls and the loud noise felt so good in her angry mind.
I hate you all!
The teacher spoke again to her. Her English was bad and if she wouldn't get any better she'd fail this school year. No one wanted to keep a loser. And the teacher said that they all expected her to win the important race between the different schools of Tokyo to have a chance to get to the championship of Japan.
Use your chance, Tenô-san. It is your only one.
Hai, because I am too stupid to learn vocabulary and to read Shakespeare.
But the same time she knew that she wasn't too stupid. She simply didn't have the time to study more. It all would have been easier if she'd ask someone for help. But she didn't know whom to ask. Nor did she want to fall on her knees before people who would certainly laugh at her, at her life.
Just like they already laugh about my appearance...
The fourth door didn't give in her anger and so she kicked it again. She heard how the lock broke, but the door didn't slam this time against white tiles. The person didn't scream. Nor did she react. She simply sat there and stared at Haruka with wide blue eyes. Filled with tears.
"Gomen, I didn't want to hurt you." whispered Haruka and her anger disappeared within the next minute. It changed into shame - and concern when the smaller pupil didn't react. "Michiru?" Shortly Haruka looked around but they were alone in the girl's bathroom. Slowly, she stepped into the cabin and closed the door behind her. The lock laid somewhere on the ground and she simply kicked it away. Then she went on her knees before the smaller pupil and tried to look directly into teary blue eyes. Suddenly, Haruka didn't remember all her anger any longer. That the sea beauty hadn't greeted her. That they hadn't talked to each other all day after she ran away yesterday. All she saw was the desperate face. A pale face. A beautiful face.
"Michiru?" she whispered again and raised her right hand to stroke some sea green curls on a small back. "Everything alright?"
Michiru didn't react. She only lowered her head and the sobbing increased.
The school bell rang again and the next lesson started definable. But Haruka knew that she wouldn't take part. Mila and her club had tortured her the entire morning and she wasn't keen to see again in that grinning face.
I won't leave her alone here.
"Do you want to talk about it?" asked Haruka and quickly looked at her watch. It was eleven o'clock now.
I would miss four lessons.
Not very important...
She tried to forget the teacher's words while Michiru only shook her head.
They simply left me. All alone...
Michiru shook her head again and tried to stand up. Her legs hurt but she ignored it. Quickly, she looked into concerned green eyes and suddenly felt ashamed of herself.
She always sees me cry. What does she think about me? That I am weak? That I am a silly, rich brat?
"You miss your parents, don't you?" asked Haruka very silently as Michiru tried to get out of the cabin. The door was already half open as Michiru froze in motion. Slowly, she turned around and now her eyes were filled with sadness - and panic.
"Hai..." it was nothing more than a sob. More tears ran over pale cheeks and automatically Haruka stepped a little bit closer and wrapped her arms around Michiru's trembling body. Deep blue eyes grew even wider.
What the hell am I doing?
Haruka swallowed hard and wanted to let her go. She knew that she shouldn't have touched her. Now the smaller pupil would tell to it the whole class and her life would even be worse.
But she looks so alone. No one should be that alone...
"Please..." Michiru's hands grabbed her waistcoat and held it desperately tight. "Please don't go..." she whispered and cried even more. Her sobs filled the bathroom and she leaned her head against Haruka's chest. The tall girl winced as her shoulder started again to hurt. Nevertheless, she held the trembling girl in her arms tighter, leaned her head against hers and whispered calming words. All the words she once wanted to hear from her mother when she told her that her father came to her in the middle of the night. But all she got were a rude laughter and the words that it was all her fault. That she had provoked him.
I won't go, Michiru. As long as you don't push me away. Like all the other people did...
She swallowed hard and started to caress over the small back.
She's very slim. Too slim for a girl of her age.
It took a long time until the smaller girl calmed down. As Haruka looked down there were still tears running down a pale cheeks. They were clear. Just like diamonds. But a thin smile laid on that sad face, too.
"Arigato..." whispered Michiru as Haruka handled her a handkerchief - without letting her go. "Normally I don't cry that easily and that often."
But this time isn't normal at all.
"Don't worry. Cry as many times as you have to cry." Answered Haruka and stroked through sea green hairs.
They indeed feel like velvet.
"I am there - if you want me."
Michiru nodded and looked for a long time into mysteriously sparkling dark green eyes.
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"Don't worry about the lessons. My uncle is doctor. He'll give me an attest, because I was feeling ill. And you were the one taking me home. Therefore, the teachers won't kill us tomorrow." Explained Michiru as she opened the door to the restaurant. It looked very expensive and suddenly Haruka felt totally out of place with her worn out pullover and her old pants.
"That's what you call feeling ill?" she asked and blinked as a man with a black suit came over to them.
That's all too expensive. Guess I can't even afford a simple tea.
"The whole morning I couldn't eat anything and now I am simply hungry." Answered Michiru and talked shortly to the man. The next minute they sat at a small table next to a huge window. Next to a warm heating. Haruka sighed happily, because all morning she had felt very cold. Quickly, she looked around and saw the chandeliers. They shimmered in all colours of the rainbow. There were a few people sitting at other tables. It was early afternoon. Lunch time was over and it was still too early for dinner. In the middle of the restaurant stood a huge aquarium with a lot of shinning fish. Overall were exotic plants and Haruka asked herself why the man with the black suit hadn't thrown her out yet.
"What do you want?" asked Michiru while she studied the menue. "I've been here twice with my uncle and my niece and I have to admit that the fish is great. But the last time my niece had noodles and they looked very delicious, too." Michiru giggled while reading. "You should've seen her. She dirtied her clothes and the whole table with the tomato soup. And when the waiter asked us if it was delicious, she nodded and grinned at him with her redden mouth. I simply love her. She's a cute little girl and she's so funny, although she's very ill..." The last sentence let Haruka turn around. There was again such a sad look on Michiru's face, but there were no tears in her deep blue eyes.
"She's a real tomboy. Guess my uncle did something wrong when he raised her. But I love her the way she is." Michiru looked up and smiled into a pale face.
Why is she so nervous? Doesn't she like the restaurant?
Secretly, Michiru looked at the worn out pullover and knew what Haruka was so concerned about.
"Haruka?" She frowned but at that moment the waiter came and bowed slightly before them.
"What do you want?" he asked and lightened the candle between them.
"..." Haruka lowered her head and stared helplessly into the card. The prices were even higher than she had expected.
That's too expensive. I don't even have the money to buy a whole loaf bread – I can't eat in such a noble restaurant.
"Do you like noodles?" asked Michiru and smiled friendly at the waiter. He smiled friendly back and waited patiently.
Nani?
"..." again Haruka didn't know what to say.
Better I'll get up and leave this restaurant as long as I am still able to.
Everyone eats noodles.
"Twice menu twelve and two teas with milk." Ordered Michiru and nodded as the waiter disappeared with another bow.
I can't pay that!
Haruka swallowed hard and slowly laid the card down. Suddenly, she felt trapped and didn't know what to do. Simply to run away wasn't possible any longer.
Maybe I can clean the dishes...
"May I invite you, Haruka? As a small arigato for you being there - twice when I didn't feel so happy." Asked Michiru and leaned slightly forward. To take an icy hand in her own one. Slowly Haruka looked up and frowned. Then she nodded. Relieved and thankful.
Is she a friend now?
However, she didn't dare to ask. Nor did she dare to move. To break the gentle touch to the sea beauty in front of her. To look away from shinning blue eyes.
"It isn't easy to live without them." Said Michiru after a long pause in which they simply sat their. Holding their hand. Looking at each other. In a warm, pleasant silence. Haruka nodded slightly. She knew that the smaller girl was talking about her dead parents. "The nightmares are horrible and I didn't sleep at all last night. Every time I heard a car on the street I stood up and ran to the window. But all cars past by and there was no silver Ferrari coming home. They didn't return in the middle of the night to tell me that it was all just a big mistake. That another Ferrari had an accident and that they had been to one of my father's concerts..." Michiru swallowed hard and felt how Haruka's hand squeezed her one comfortingly. She didn't find annoyance or even boredom as she had found in so many faces before. All she found was sympathy - and understanding.
"It's okay at home. With my uncle and my lovely niece. But sometimes the memories are too fresh and... and it simply hurts to be alone. My uncle is very concerned about me and my niece tries everything she's able to make me happy. She draws cute pictures and she even made a nice doll for me. But she's only five years old and I can't tell her what I am afraid of..."
The waiter came back with their lunch and Haruka blushed slightly. But Michiru didn't let go of her hand and the waiter pretended not to see it. He placed the hot teas and the steaming noodles in front of them and wished them a good lunch. Then he bowed again and disappeared between the tables, the plants and the aquarium. But he would be there when Michiru would want anything more.
Can't remember the last time I had a real, a warm meal...
Haruka swallowed hard as she looked down at her plate. She smelled the delicious scent and immediately her stomach started to growl again.
"I miss them so much..." Michiru took a deep breath and wiped away some tears with her free hand. Then she smiled a sad but honest smile and squeezed Haruka's hand for the last time before she let go and took her fork. "But now we should eat before it's getting cold."
Haruka nodded thoughtfully and looked over to the smaller girl who wanted to be so desperately strong but was weak and broken inside. Who was hurt and simply wanted to heal her world - knowing that there was no possibility left to do so.
"If you'll ever need a comforting word again, just ask me, Michiru. Maybe I am a freak, but I know that one can be sad sometimes."
Especially in such a bad time.
Michiru nodded and watched how Haruka ate with hunger and great appetite. A thin smile appeared on her face and she tried to reach the sugar to sweeten her tea. It was too far away and Haruka gave it to her.
"Arigato."
Their hands touched again and they both froze for a moment that was over too soon.
You aren't a freak. You're my one and only friend. My real friend.
Michiru smiled as she tried her meal, too, and knew that it had been the right decision. It was simply delicious.
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It was already dusk when she walked home. Her pullover could hardly hold back the bitter cold from her trembling body. It was November, autumn was almost over. The radio already talked about snow.
Haruka held her schoolbag tighter and brought her hands to her mouth to warm them with her breath. Tiny clouds filled the air before her face.
Soon it's winter and I don't have a jacket. Nor boots.
Sadly, she looked down at her shoes and knew that they wouldn't make it another winter. Maybe not even another month. They were simply worn out and she had to take care that she didn't step into a puddle. Because then she would have got wet sockets.
Nevertheless, Haruka smiled. The stars above seemed to sparkle happily in an endless, dark sky. It was calm in the inner city. Some cars passed by but the time of the traffic jam was over. It was past eight in the evening and all afternoon she had sat in the small restaurant with Michiru and they had talked about all things that came into their minds. About school, about tests. About English and the orchestra Michiru would join the coming week. About her CD Haruka had never heard and about Michiru's hobby drawing nice pictures. To prove it she took a sketchbook out of her schoolbag and drew the candlelight standing on their table. It looked so real that Haruka watched it for a long while and said quietly that Michiru was indeed talented.
So Michiru gave it Haruka who didn't want to take it at first. But then she was happy and put it carefully in her own bag. Between her old book. Knowing that she would put it on the wall in her room. So that she would have something to remember whenever she woke up in the middle of the night and knew that she would stay awake for the next endless hours.
They talked a lot about the championship and about Michiru's uncle and niece. Michiru declared that she wanted to introduce them to her and Haruka agreed although she wasn't sure if her uncle really wanted to see such a poor, bad pupil near the rich, talented sea beauty.
We talked all day. But we didn't talk about her parents death any longer. Nor did we talk about my family situation.
Haruka was grateful about this fact. Michiru tried to ask her but changed the topic when the tall girl kept silent.
I don't need her sympathy.
Thoughtfully, she raised her free hand and touched the velvet scarf around her neck. Michiru insisted that she should keep it when she wanted to give it back shortly before they left. Haruka walked with Michiru until they reached again the park and they finally separated.
Can't remember the last time I have been so full.
After they ate their noodles and drank the tea, Michiru looked again at the card and ordered two huge ice creams. With wiped cream and fruits. And as she had promised earlier, she paid in the end. It was a very expensive restaurant and Haruka gasped for breath as she heard the sum. It hadn't seemed to be a lot for Michiru who gave again a big tip.
Hope she doesn't think that I am too poor to pay for myself.
Haruka stopped and closed her eyes for some seconds. Still touching the scarf.
And what if she thinks so? It's the truth. I am as poor as a church's mouse. It is enough to survive - as long as I get a part time job. But it's not enough to eat in such a noble restaurant.
Nevertheless, it had been a great afternoon and she was a little bit sad that it was over. Not knowing if they'd repeat such a nice day again.
Again she felt the soft hand reaching for her one. Holding it tight - even when the waiter came with their noodles. Again she felt the trembling body in her arms. Heard the choking whispers near her ear. Knew that the smaller woman went through hell - and she couldn't help her. Really help her. Her parents were dead and no one could bring them back. With no power of this world.
I wish, I could do more for her. I wish I could let her pain go. I wish I could make her laugh. Happy...
"What are you doing in such a noble region of Tokyo?"
The rude voice interrupted her dream so suddenly that she couldn't react. She opened her eyes and saw the objects being thrown at her. She felt them hitting her, heard glass crashing next to her on the stony ground.
"You shouldn't be here, you freak!"
Again there were three or four motorbikes running in a circle around her. They simply jumped on the pavement and suddenly she was surrounded by them.
What do they want from me?
She blinked and felt how something else was thrown at her. No more bear bottles, but vegetable. Old vegetable. It smelled terrible and the tomatoes dirtied her pullover.
Shit! It will take me all night to get it clean again.
She knew that she would freeze the entire day tomorrow. because it would take her another day to get her old, worn out pullover dry again.
"You bloody dyke! Go away! Leave our city! Leave us in peace and our friends. Our family! We don't need someone like you!"
Another tomato hit her head and red fluid flew over her now pale face. Her dark green eyes sparkled and automatically she clenched her fists. But she didn't react. She knew that the motorbikes were faster than her. Even if she were the best athlete at school, she wasn't as fast as a motorbike.
I wish I were as fast as the wind...
"We don't want you here! Do you hear me, dyke? We don't want you in our city nor do we want you in our school. So leave!"
She heard the threat, but she only watched them in silence. Felt how another vegetable hit her. It was a potato and it hit her right shoulder. She gasped hard for breath as the pain flashed again through her body. As it did every morning when she dressed herself and tried to get ready for school. To survive another day in hell.
When I win the championship I'll be able to escape them at last. Then I'll go in an athletic team, win gold medals, get price money and go somewhere else where no one knows me.
To leave Michiru?
She swallowed hard and saw the glass sparkling in rude hands. She didn't blink. She didn't even wince when it hit her right into the stomach. She only made a little sound as if all breath was knocked out of her lungs.
"You bloody lesbian! This is our last warning!"
But she knew that she wouldn't go away. Not today, not tomorrow. Not that easily.
The engines roared loudly as the men turned around and drove away. Leaving her in peace. In silence. All alone...
Asshole!
She gasped hard for breath and the schoolbag hit loudly the ground as she simply didn't have enough strength to hold it any longer. Slowly, she went on her knees and stared blankly at the ground around her. At all the smashed bear bottles. Smelling the strange scent.
The pain increased inside her body and she groaned slightly. She raised her hand and touched carefully her right shoulder. For a long time she watched her hand, saw the red fluid on her fingers. Knowing that it wasn't the remains of a tomato.
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It was hard to concentrate. She sat there in the living room. All lights were switched on. The flower in front of her stood peacefully on a table and she looked at it for a long while. Looking at the red blossoms, the green thorns. Just seeing the beauty of such a normal flower.
A rose.
But whenever she looked back on her white easel she saw a dark night. A silver Ferrari slipping off a bending road. Burning when it hit the cliff. Exploding in a huge ball of fire.
I only want to draw again.
It had been easy to draw the candlelight when Haruka had been around. When anyone was around. But at the moment she was alone and she couldn't concentrate.
I don't want to draw such a dark, depressing picture again.
Once her uncle discovered such a picture and since that day he had been even more concerned about her.
He knows how hard it is to lose the persons you love. But he has his daughter. I have no one...
Again she looked at the rose and sighed deeply.
At that moment the bell rang.
"Princess? Can you open it?" Surely it was the pizza she had ordered half an hour ago. Her uncle was still at work - as he always was in the middle of the week and so she let her niece chose. The little girl looked at her with her big pleading eyes and so they decided for pizza. That was okay for Michiru. This way she didn't have to cook and had more time for her drawings.
As long as I get one clear thought!
The bell rang a second time.
"Princess?"
A door opened.
"I just have to dress my pants." Shouted a high voice somewhere from the bathroom and Michiru had to smile.
"Okay, don't stress yourself, princess. I'll open it and take your pizza." She rose from her chair and heard how some action took place upstairs. Surely, the little girl tried to get dressed in record time just to get her pizza. The last half hour she had already hungry been and complained about it. While looking at the rose and back to her auntie who simply couldn't draw.
The door bell rang for the third time. It was short. Not like the other services when the people mostly had no time and almost slammed the door when they went away. To their bike or their car to get to the next customer.
Well, we never had that service. Hope it'll taste.
Quickly, Michiru corrected her messed hair while she walked over to the corridor and to the main door. She remembered that they had still pudding - chocolate pudding - in the fridge so she would survive another evening as auntie, mother and best friend.
And my sweet princess will survive it, too.
She smiled and opened the door. And looked shocked at the person standing outside.
"Hi, Michiru. So this is were you live." Grinned Haruka and held two packets higher. "One pizza with extra cheese and one with fish." She read and blushed slightly.
"What are you doing?" asked Michiru in surprise and looked at the white uniform Haruka was wearing. For the first time she knew her the tall girl didn't seem to be cold.
"I am saving you from starving." Answered Haruka still holding the pizzas in her hands. "And to improve my pocket money."
Haruka's smile got a little bit nervous.
To earn enough money to get by.
"Ruka!" The scream interrupted the silence between them. A small shadow ran down the staircase, almost flew through the corridor and jumped with another scream into Haruka's arms. The tall girl let go of the pizzas and Michiru was busy to catch them.
"Ruka!" shouted the small girl again and laughed a happy child's laughter.
"Hello, Hime-chan." Whispered Haruka and squeezed the little girl in her arms for some seconds. She looked into dark eyes and love was written all over her now redden face. Love and unconditional trust. Feelings Michiru had never seen before on the always pale and absent face.
Hime-chan?
Michiru blinked, still holding the pizzas.
Ruka?
"I didn't see you for such a long time, Ruka!" said the little girl and her black hair flew over her shoulders as she raised her head and kissed the tall girl on both cheeks. Haruka blushed deeply and the smile became even more tenderly.
She looks like proud mommy...
Automatically, Michiru smiled. Then she put the pizza aside and walked over to Haruka to free her.
"Hey, princess, don't kill her. She's already all red. She needs her breath." She declared and Hotaru let go of the tall woman with obviously a lot of hesitation.
"She's your niece?" asked Haruka still looking at the small girl with the big grin on her face. Excitedly, dark eyes watched her openly.
It's been such a long time now...
Haruka swallowed hard as she remembered how she got to know the small girl. It was now almost one year that she saw the little girl of just four years running through the park. Being hunted by some older children who went with her in the same kindergarten. They wanted to hurt her. Her, the always ill, always choking little girl. A wild tomboy who had too many attacks. Everyone was afraid of her. The witch, as they all called her. The little girl stumbled and fell down. She didn't weep nor did she scream. She only cried in silence when the other reached her.
She looks better today.
Haruka could remember how she defended the little girl who had another attack. And high fever. How she cared the whole night for the small girl - living in fear that she could do anything wrong. Until dawn came, the fever sank and Hotaru was able to tell her where she lived.
Hope the other children are nicer to her now.
"Hai. Tomoe Hotaru. A little tomboy and devil, but when you're sleeping, you're nice, aren't you?" Michiru grabbed with her free hand her niece and hugged her softly. The little girl nodded, still looking at Haruka.
"Please, Michi, can't she eat with us? There's enough pizza for all of us." Declared the small girl and the next second Haruka held her again in her strong arms. Ignoring the pain flashing through her right shoulder.
I've never seen her this way. Being so trustful to someone. After her mother's death she was a lost, little girl. She only trusted her father and my family. And now she hangs on Haruka as if she were her only life line.
Michi?
The tall girl frowned and automatically held the little girl tighter.
I don't want to let her go. She likes me the way I am. She never asked stupid questions about my appearance. She has no prejudices. She really seems to love me.
She blinked as tears burned in her eyes.
"If you want to stay, Haruka, we have enough pizza. Hotaru is right. And I already did my homework." She smiled and walked over to the living room. The table was already set and she simply took out another dish. Quickly, Haruka looked back at her bike outside and saw the dark clouds. Soon it would start to rain. A cold, heavy rain with big, freezing drops.
This was the last address this evening. The last two pizzas.
Now her shift was over and all she had to do now was to give back the bike to the restaurant. So that the shift at midnight had it. But there was a long time until midnight. Hotaru in her arms felt so warm and she had to admit that she was indeed hungry. All day she had nothing more to eat than an old orange.
"What do you think, Hime-chan? Do you really want to share your pizza?"
The little girl only nodded and held her even tighter.
So Haruka closed the door and came slowly over to the living room. She stripped her wet shoes and walked in socks over soft carpets. Expensive carpets. Suddenly, she was ashamed about the holes in her old sockets.
At least they're clean.
Michiru didn't notice them. She just opened an apple juice bottle when she came over. There was soft music playing in the background. Violin music. Haruka didn't know it. Maybe Mozart. Maybe Beethoven.
It sounds nice. Touching. Tender...
"Hotaru!" Michiru crossed her arms before her chest and looked directly into her niece's face. "Don't you think you're old enough to eat on your own?" The small girl lowered her head and it seemed as if she wanted to sit on Haruka's lap all dinner.
"Oh, don't worry, It's okay. She's not very heavy."
She's too light for a girl of her age.
So Hotaru made a satisfied face and kept sitting on Haruka's lap while she reached for her pizza and started to eat with such an appetite the little girl hadn't shown during the last week.
Last weekend she had another attack and threw up all her food. It was alike what we gave her, she simply couldn't keep it down.
Michiru watched her for some seconds in silence.
I am glad that it tastes today. She needs her meals to take her medicine. To be strong and wild again. And maybe, to be healthy again one day.
"Ruka's my best friend." Said Hotaru between the second and the third slice of pizza and made an important face. Some spots of tomato soup already covered her white t-shirt and her mouth was redden. Her dark eyes sparkled happily and the little girl looked like a normal, healthy, wild child at her age.
Haruka blushed as she heard those innocent, honest words but a thin smile appeared on her face, nonetheless, as she looked tenderly at Hotaru on her lap.
"And she's your friend, too, auntie Michi?" Hotaru looked from loving deep blue eyes into startled green ones without noticing it. She took the fourth pizza piece and frowned. Then she cut another one and put it into Haruka's suddenly icy hand.
"You should eat something, too. The whole pizza is too much for me. It's with a lot of cheese and it's delicious!" The little girl smiled happily.
For a long time Michiru watched Haruka who saved more than once the carpet when Hotaru let go of her slice and grabbed for her apple juice. The tall girl didn't dare to eat until the little girl was full. Then she started to eat, too. She ate carefully and slowly. But suddenly Michiru knew that Haruka was very hungry. Just like yesterday.
"Hai, we're good friends, aren't we, Haruka?"
Haruka raised her head and looked thoughtfully at her. Then she nodded and automatically repeated Michiru's tender smile.
Hotaru laughed in satisfaction and reached again for her apple juice.
"That's good."
With those words she knocked over her glass and transformed the table into a huge lake.
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"Were you able to solve the English homework?" Michiru filled the dishwasher and closed the door. They had sat there at the table for over two hours and simply talked. In the meantime Hotaru fell asleep in Haruka's arms but the tall girl didn't want to lay her down on the couch. She simply held her tight and watched her for a long time while Michiru talked.
Michiru started the dishwasher and went over to the living room again as no one answered.
"Haruka?"
She froze in motion as she saw the two persons lying on the couch. Sleeping deep and tight. Hotaru laid still in those strong arms. Feeling safe and secure. A smile was on her face as she crept closer to the warm body next to her. Her black hair was messed as she leaned her head against Haruka's chest.
The tall girl slept, too. She had put her arms carefully around the little girl. Blond strands covered her closed eyes and a tender smile laid on her face.
Michiru looked at them for a long time. Not able to move. Suddenly tears filled her eyes and she went over and covered them carefully with a soft blanket.
Ruka...
Carefully she stroked through blond hair and wondered again why the others didn't like the tall girl. Hotaru, who trusted seldom anyone, liked her obviously.
They're all silly, blind brats.
Michiru sighed deeply. Then she sat behind her easel and simply started to draw. The pencil flew over the white paper and soon the picture evolved on the paper.
It was the first time that she didn't draw a deadly accident. That she didn't draw about her hate, about her despair. About her fears.
For the first time she smiled while she drew.
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"Ruka?"
The soft voice woke her slowly up. It was dark in the room and she needed some moments to remember where she was. The warm couch was strangely cold beside her. Someone was missing.
"Where's Hime-chan?" she whispered and her voice was full with sleep.
"She's in bed. Better you go to bed, too. The couch is too hard. We have a guest room. You can take it, if you want. My uncle can drive to school us tomorrow and we can fetch up your things before we get there." Said Michiru and Haruka felt soft hands stroking through her short blond hair.
The desire to stretch her arms and to embrace the sea beauty was almost irresistible.
Guest room? Go to bed?
"How late is it?" she asked tiredly and rubbed her eyes. She gasped for breath as her shoulder started to hurt again and it took her twice attempts until she sat again on the couch.
"It's past two in the morning." Whispered Michiru and saw how Haruka's tired eyes grew wide. "Is that too late?" Suddenly she remembered that Haruka still wore her pizza uniform and swallowed hard. The tall girl had looked so cute on the couch that she simply didn't have the heart to wake her up. Haruka looked as if she hadn't slept a lot the last nights and over her drawing Michiru forgot time.
Two in the morning?
Haruka sighed deeply and ran a shaking hand through her messed hairs.
The midnight shift is over. And they didn't have the bike...
She stood up and looked directly into concerned deep blue eyes.
So I have to look again for a part time job. They won't forgive me this mistake.
"Don't worry, Michiru." Haruka managed to smile and slowly walked over to the corridor. Her shoes were still wet and cold but she forced herself to pull them over her old socks. "But I guess it's better when I go home now. Arigato for the pizza and for the nice evening."
Quickly, Michiru took Haruka's cold hands in her own and held them determinedly tight. It seemed as if she wanted to say something, but then she decided to keep silent.
"I see you tomorrow in class." She whispered and yawned slightly.
"Hai."
Haruka let go of the hand and opened the door. Hesitatingly, she looked back. Into deep blue eyes that were full of friendship and trust. There was no hate. No anger. No disgust.
My friend...
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The window pane was dirty. Very dirty. But still she cold see the moon shinning between thick clouds. It started to rain shortly after she had left Michiru's house and of course she was all wet when she came to the Italian restaurant.
Haruka sat on the rim of the window and simply stared outside.
Maybe I'll find another job. Soon.
She didn't want to think of the scream of the restaurant owner. That he had never seen such a lazy person like her.
Just two more weeks until I have to pay my rent.
Haruka sighed deeply and lowered her head. But there was suddenly a smile on her face and she touched again the scarf hanging around her neck. Believing to smell Michiru's sweet perfume.
She's my friend now. She declared it loudly in front of Hime-chan.
Haruka leaned her head against the cold window pane and saw how the first light crept over the horizon. In about an hour she had to be ready to go to school again. But this time it would be a little bit easier to get into this old building than it had been the past two years. Because now she wasn't all alone any longer. Now she had her Michiru. Her one and only friend.
She called me Ruka.
No one called her different than dyke or lesbian. Or other bad names. Just Hime-chan used to call her that nice nickname. A small child who didn't know that she wasn't normal. That she wasn't the nice girl they all expected her to be. And now Michiru called her by that nice nickname, too.
I wish it would stay this way. I wish we would stay friends. That the other pupils won't be able to convince her that I am mean and rude. That I am not the right friend for her.
The noise above increased. A woman started to groan highly and the groans of a man joined her some seconds later. A bed started to creak. Louder and louder. In a steady rhythm that got faster and faster.
Can't you be quiet?
Haruka lowered her head again and covered her ears with her hands.
Can't you be quiet for only one night?
Above lived a young woman of maybe twenty five. She lived alone there. Just like Haruka. To get by. But the woman didn't look for part time jobs. Instead she invited men to come with her to her room.
Each night another guy...
Haruka pressed her hands tighter on her ears and started to tremble.
Can't they just be a little bit quieter!
Once she went up to them and ask them to be quieter. But the man only laughed at her and the woman declared that they only wanted to have their fun. That they tried to be quieter - but that the bed was old and that it simply creaked.
It lasted about ten minutes until they were finished. Slowly the noised died away and silence was all that remained. A silence that seemed to choke the tall girl.
Haruka wiped away some tears and left the rim of the window. Slowly, she walked over to the door to get to the huge bathroom she shared with all people at this storey. It was dirty and she would never try to use the showers there. But the water was cold and maybe it would help her to wash away the dirt she still felt whenever she woke in the middle of the night and remembered how much they hurt her.
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