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by aprileagle

The pupil at school don't like Haruka very much. The wild tomboy. Until a new pupil comes into the class and conquers Haruka's heart easily. COMPLETE & REREAD

3. Chapter 2: Sea goddess

Chapter two: Sea goddess

The sea was wild. Wild and endless. Wild and endless and deep. Just like her mind. Her soul. Her whole being.

It was already dawn and the sun rose from the horizon. The water started to sparkle. The orange light was reflected in tears shimmering in deep blue eyes.

Why did you leave me?

Michiru wrapped her arms tighter around her trembling body. The schoolbag laid next to her in the wet sand and rough wind played with her long, white coat.

Why did you have to go?

Michiru swallowed hard and her hair fell open over her shoulders as the wind undid the knot.

Why didn't you give me the choice to decide if I wanted to go with you?

The rushes of the waves sounded appeasing.

Why didn't you say goodbye? At least goodbye to your daughter?

But they couldn't calm her down.

"And, how did your boss react?"

Michiru stepped over the wet grass and sat down next to the tall girl. Ignoring the cold creeping under her clothes. Ignoring the dirt on her white coat.

"Guess I have to look for another job. But don't worry, still the pocket money's enough." Said Haruka and put the newspaper away. "And I wanted to go anyway. The money was too less and to drive through the whole of Tokyo just to deliver pizza wasn't what I really wanted. So don't worry."

Why do I lie to her?

She frowned as she looked into a tired face. Almost as tired as her own one.

Because I don't want to concern her. My only friend...

"The next time I'll ask you when you want to be waken up." Smiled Michiru and searched in her schoolbag for something.

The next time?

Haruka leaned back against the trunk of the huge tree and watched her in silence. She tried to creep deeper into the shadows as some pupils passed by and looked at the kneeling beauty. Curiously. But too busy to ask her what she was doing there. So all alone under a tree.

"Nevertheless, it was my fault that you had so much stress last night. Please, take it. I know that I am not such a good cook, but Hime-chan likes it and so I hope you'll like it, too."

With those words she put a small box in Haruka's hands. It was wrapped in a white cloth. It felt warm.

"A bento?" asked Haruka in surprise and couldn't remember the last time someone cooked something for her.

Not even mother wanted to make something for me. Even at the times father didn't drunk that much. Didn't beat us that much. When we still had enough money to live a normal life.

Normal...

"Hai. Hope it tastes." Michiru bowed slightly, then she stood up. "I have to hurry. Today I'll have a rehearsal with the school's orchestra and I don't want to be late." At that moment Haruka saw the small black case Michiru held in her other hand.

Her violin?

"Bye. See you later at the swimming pool." Michiru turned away and ran away, because the bell already told her that she was too late.

At the swimming pool...

Haruka shivered but knew that there was no chance of escaping the lesson she hated most.

Slowly, she unwrapped the bento and stared for a long time at the food prepared with so much love. The tomatoes looked like little hedgehogs with the parsley in it. And the eggs had little noses and reminded Haruka of little mice. With salad as tails. The bread smelled delicious and it was still warm in her hands.

When did she prepare it? In the morning? Before she went to school?

Haruka's throat was tight as her trembling fingers took an hedgehog tomato and watched it for a long time.

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Her dark t-shirt was still dry. So were the boxers she was wearing. Just like the boys did who had the lessons before them. The last of them just left the swimming pool and went over to their own bathroom to take a shower and to get dressed again.

School swimming. The last lesson of this day. Just two more hours and she would be able to go home. To get her hopefully now dry pullover and to ask in other shops for a part time job.

Hopefully I'll find one.

She was pushed aside not very gently as Mila passed by. She wore a blue swimsuit and her eyes told Haruka that she wasn't welcomed here. All girls wore narrow swimsuits and had long or at least shoulder long hair. Of course none of the girls would have ever dared to say something rude to her while their swimming teacher was around. The strict woman of maybe thirty, maybe thirty five years was determined and she wanted her class to be a team. To be fast in the water. To be one with the element. Of course a lot of pupils failed. They didn't like the water or were even afraid of it. But as long as they tried to be good, as long as they really gave their best the teacher was satisfied. But if you didn't... if you looked at the lessons as a bad joke, she could be a real devil.

Haruka liked that teacher.

"This swimming pool is almost as big as the one we have at home." Whispered Michiru and stood the next moment next to Haruka. Quickly, the sea beauty observed the black t-shirt, then she smiled into a pale face. "Hope the water isn't too hot. When it's too hot I could simply lay on the surface and close my eyes. But then I am not that fast, because then I am feeling like I am in our tub at home."

Haruka only nodded and tried not to look too openly at Michiru's body. The swimsuit was as sea green as her hair and was very tight. It showed all her female outlines and once more Haruka had to admit that the smaller pupil was beautiful.

"Although we have a big tub, Hime-chan always says it's like a swimming pool, too. Made only for her." Michiru giggled but got serious again as the school bell rang and the teacher appeared at the rim of the swimming pool.

Soon they had to count and to stand up in two arrays before the swimming pool. To make a dive and to swim to the other side - about two hundred meters away. The teacher wanted to stop the time and then they wanted to do their normal programme in the water.

"Dyke."

"Bloody freak!"

Again bad words fell behind her. Very, very silently that the teacher couldn't hear them. But loud enough for Haruka to understand.

Michiru next to her turned around and watched the girls behind her. A happy smile laid on her face and automatically the girls smiled back. The voices died away immediately.

"I have problems with the math homework. Can I look at your results to see what I've done wrong or if I've been right?" asked Yakoto and turned around to Michiru. Still they were all waiting in the array until it was their turn.

"Of course. Just remind me in the end of the lesson. The homework is in my bag."

I didn't know that we had some homework to do.

Haruka frowned and kept staring at her naked feet.

Well, I wouldn't have had time to do it, anyway.

The pupils swam and the teacher shouted the time and that they should start. She had a loud, high pipe you couldn't overhear when starting.

The next moment Haruka stood at the rim and took a deep breath. Since the guys threw the things at her, her shoulder hurt more and more. She didn't dare to move it and now she was supposed to swim? Of course the teacher would await her to be the best. As she always was.

I have to be good in sport. No, I have to be the best. Otherwise, they will kick me out from school. And what shall I do without a good graduation?

"Ruka?"

She raised her head as she heard the tender voice next to her. A silent voice only she could hear. Michiru stood next to her and smiled softly at her.

"It is an honour to swim with you." Teased the smaller girl and got into the right position.

Honour...

"Ready?"

She didn't notice that she got into her position, too.

Honour...

"Steady."

I am not honourable.

The pain increased inside her body but she ignored it as she used all her muscles to prepare her body to swim those two hundred meters - with all her powers.

But she is...

"GO!"

The pupils started to scream as the two girls dove into the clear, pleasantly cool water. Haruka bit on her lip as she forced her arms to move. The pain was almost unbearable but she didn't give up.

Michiru was right next to her. She was a little bit faster than her and Haruka noticed it. But it didn't matter, because suddenly she knew that no one could beat the sea beauty in her element.

Don't give up!

Suddenly she heard the soft voice in her head and while she came to the surface to gasp for breath she looked directly into deep blue eyes.

I am by your side, don't be afraid.

Her shoulder hurt more and more and she was extremely tired with a sudden. But that voice kept her going on. For another move. And another move.

Just twenty more meters.

The teacher stood excitedly at the rim and shouted the seconds. The pupils stood around the swimming pool and shouted, too. It seemed to be that the Tenô girl would be beaten for the first time.

Darkness waited at the rim of her eyes and her lungs wanted more breath. But she knew that she wouldn't return to the surface again. Otherwise she wouldn't finish this race. Her whole body trembled and she felt suddenly cold. Her eyes burned and she only stretched her arms and fought for the last time.

At last!

Her hands touched the rim and she came to the surface and gasped hard for breath. Her fingers couldn't hold the slippery rim any longer and again she dove under the surface.

Two hands grabbed for her arms and she winced very hard as Michiru helped her over the surface again. Thoughtfully looking blue eyes stared for some seconds into tired green ones.

"My congratulations." Whispered Michiru as the girls started to cheer up in the swimming hall. "I've never seen anyone who was a real opponent. You were the first one who could be almost as fast as me. That's seldom. Normally, the people I swim against are on the half of the swimming pool when I reach the rim. You were only some inches behind."

Still, Michiru held her and Haruka grabbed blindly for the rim until she got it.

"Yippee! Michiru won the race!"

"Hai, she's the fastest swimmer of our class!"

"She's even faster than the bloody Tenô-girl."

The bloody Tenô-girl.

Haruka closed her eyes and took a deep breath.

"Everything alright, Ruka? Are you able to get out or shall I help you?" asked Michiru so quietly that the cheering girls couldn't hear her words.

Ruka...

Haruka opened her eyes again and shook her head. Then she freed herself and forced her body to move again. To climb out of the swimming pool. To ignore the rude shouts of the girls around. Until the teacher told them to be quiet. The silence which surrounded them now was even worse.

"Incredible!" said the teacher and showed the still waiting girls to stay at the rim for another minute. Then she came over to the two girls and shook first Haruka's then Michiru's hand.

"You've broken your record, Haruka. You've been almost one second faster than in your best days." Her smile was friendly and honest but Haruka felt miserable. She only wanted to leave. To go in her small room at the end of the world. To sit down on the window's rim and die.

"And I've never seen anyone as fast as you've been, Michiru. That was a new school record!" The teacher shook her head again in disbelieve and took a deep breath. "That was really good, you two." She said. Then she turned away to take again care for the other girls. Curious looking girls.

Michiru nodded and smiled. Then she looked at Haruka who still stared at the wet ground. There were again excited voices around them, but the tall girl didn't seem to hear them at all. She reeled slightly and her whole body trembled. Now the t-shirt was wet and Michiru could see the female outlines under the normally wide clothes.

How does she hide her breasts?

She could see them now. And she could see how slim the tall girl was. Almost skinny.

Doesn't she eat enough?

Michiru frowned and remembered how much hunger Haruka did have when they were to the Italian restaurant and when they ate pizza with Hotaru.

She's indeed a woman.

Michiru swallowed hard.

She's not a freak. She's beautiful. A sensible soul...

At that moment Haruka raised her head and Michiru couldn't define if tears sparkled in dark green eyes. Her face was wet from the water but the expression was sad.

All alone...

Automatically, Haruka crossed her arms before her chest. To hide her female body behind them. To hide her aching soul behind them. To hide herself behind them.

Why are you hiding?

Michiru wanted to go over to her. To embrace her. To hold her tight. To ask her all the questions she was normally too shy to ask.

Why are you hiding from me?

"Ruka..."

Michiru raised her hand - and was suddenly pushed away by some excitedly giggling girls. Again some other pupils were down in the water but none of them would reach her record time.

"You've been great, Michiru!"

"I've never seen anyone as fast as you!"

"You looked like a fish!"

"Like a dolphin in it's element."

"How did you do that?"

Haruka watched helplessly how Michiru walked away with the girls. With a smiling Yakoto. With a wickedly laughing Mila. With other pupils she used to know. Two years ago they had been her friends, too. Before she changed and they showed their real faces.

Again two other pupils started to swim and Haruka decided to step back and to sit down somewhere in the shadows. To watch them in silence and to hope that the teacher would forget her for the rest of the lesson.

"So finally someone beat the Tenô girl."

"And I am really happy that you have been that person!"

Haruka swallowed hard as she saw how Michiru stood beside the rim and talked excitedly with the girls. How she explained them something and raised her hands over the surface. How she laughed happily as Yakoto asked her some questions and how they all looked at her with big eyes as Michiru told them that she used to live in a huge house by the sea. That she learned swimming when she was a little baby. That her mother had been once to the Olympic Games and won a medal for her swimming.

Sunlight shone through the huge windows and covered the sea beauty. The drops in sea green hair sparkled like pearls and in her swimsuit she looked indeed like a mermaid. Like Neptune's daughter. Like a princess of the wide, endless sea.

Unreachable.

Haruka took a deep breath and automatically clenched her fists while she leaned against the cold wall. Strands of blond hair fell in treacherously shinning green eyes.

Unreachable for me.

Haruka lowered her head and tried not to hear again the happy laughing voices.

I don't belong in her world. I am not a sea prince. I am not even a normal pupil. A normal friend. Surely, her uncle doesn't know that she knows me. And surely he doesn't know that Hime-chan calls me her best friend...

"You're the best swimmer, Michiru!"

"Can you show me how to dive? It looked fantastic!"

Haruka closed her eyes. No one saw her. No one noticed her. No one took care of her.

"Please, can you show me how to swim like you do?"

The tall girl gasped as the pain increased inside her body, but she kept silent.

Please, can't you show me how to have faith again?

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It was silent in the swimming hall. All that could be heard were the quiet rushes of the water. It sparkled in all colours of the rainbow in the setting daylight. Like a golden carpet. Like a never ending fire. Being born of earth and water.

She closed her eyes and spreat her arms wide. There was no wind in the swimming hall, but nevertheless she could feel it playing with her long hair. Again she could smell the salt in the air. Again she could hear the screams of the sea birds high above. In an endless sky. She stepped closer towards the rim and felt the pleasant water around her naked feet. Again she could see the wide ocean right before her.

This is me!

Michiru took a deep breath before she let go. For some seconds that seemed to last eternity she flew through the air. Then there was a loud crash as her body dove into the deep water. Then there was silence. Calming silence. Nice silence. Welcoming silence.

Here's peace.

Michiru dove some meters. Then she turned around and looked at the blurred surface above. She could see the waves, could feel them. But she couldn't hear them. All she heard was that silence that was typical for the wide ocean. It seemed to call her name.

Here is were I belong.

She spreat her arms again and simply flew in the wet element. Like a bird. Weightlessly. Independent. Not to be bound on the ground. On feelings like sorrow or sadness. On expectations she simply couldn't fulfil any longer. On people who were nothing more than ghosts in her so fast fading memories.

Too fast.

She opened her mouth and observed in fascination how some bubbles made their way to the surface to disappear there into nothing.

Just like my parents...

Michiru closed her eyes again and became one with the waving water. Her body relaxed and she simply was a part of that never ending, never staying ocean that never stopped existing.

This is my world. Only my world. Where no one can harm me. Where no one can hurt me. Where no one can leave me all alone.

Are you sure?

She opened her eyes again as she heard the familiar low voice. The water shivered as another person dove besides her. Michiru was too surprised as two arms grabbed her that she couldn't react that quickly. Someone helped her to the surface and she heard how someone gasped hard for breath.

"Are you okay?" The low voice sounded now very concerned. Michiru frowned and turned her head slightly to look into terrified green eyes. Wide opened.

"Do you want to drown yourself?" Haruka swallowed hard as the smaller girl in her arms didn't react. She only stared at her as if she were an alien. A creature from another world.

Or has she been the one being in another world? A world only she knows?

"Everything alright, Michi? Say something!"

Michi...

That nickname brought her back into reality.

"Of course." She answered and coughed because she got water in her mouth. "I can hold my breath for a long time."

Haruka looked very doubtfully down at her and pulled her determinedly towards the near rim.

"It's simply so wonderfully peaceful under the surface."

The tall girl looked quickly at her again before she left the water and helped her to get out, too. The huge swimming hall was empty now. They were the last pupils.

"Down there it's dangerous and too less fresh air." Answered Haruka and looked around for their towels. She gave Michiru a dark blue one. It was soft and felt new. Her own one was black and hard. She didn't have the right detergent and it was now four years old. But as long as it did its job she wouldn't buy a new one.

From what money?

"Arigato." Michiru wrapped herself in the towel and noticed that she was suddenly freezing.

Better I'll take a hot shower.

She looked at Haruka who hid her body again - this time behind her dark towel. The tall girl trembled, too, and her lips were pale, almost blue.

Better she'll take a hot shower, too.

Suddenly, Michiru had to grin.

"Let's take a shower and go home. It's already dusk." She said and took carefully Haruka's right hand - noticing how the taller girl winced slightly.

What if they aren't finished now?

Haruka had waited in the shadows for the last fifteen minutes. To be sure that they all left the showers when she got into the bathroom. She could still remember too well the last time she had to join the other pupils. How they shouted at her. How they threw their shampoo at her. And their wet towels. How they screamed so long until she left the bathroom again - voluntarily.

So she watched Michiru diving into the clear water and got more and more concerned while more and more time passed by. Until she decided to rescue her - even if the smaller girl didn't want to get rescued.

"Maybe I should wait."

Haruka blushed and tried to escape Michiru's hand.

She's surely not very keen on seeing me naked.

"Why?" asked Michiru in surprise and turned around. Again Haruka looked into blue eyes that were almost as deep as the wide ocean.

I could drown in them...

"Because I forgot my shampoo."

You liar! The bottle's empty and you don't have enough money to buy a new one.

"Oh, don't worry, I have enough for the both of us." Answered Michiru and pulled her determinedly with her while she started to talk about the endless sea again she grew up at. Haruka only sighed deeply, but she knew that it would be senseless to contradict the smaller girl.

Hope she knows what she does. She's very popular.

Haruka shook slightly her head and winced as the pain returned into her body.

And I am only the school's freak.

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"These showers are so small." Michiru frowned as she stepped into the cabin. "At home we had a bigger one and even my uncle's ones are bigger." The sea beauty put her shampoo bottle down and opened the cabin again. Haruka stood still in the empty bathroom and seemed to wait for her to finish.

"But that's always the problem of poor schools. I am happy that at least the pool isn't as small as I had feared at first." Before Haruka could react Michiru grabbed her left arm and had pulled her determinedly into the cabin. Then she closed the door behind her.

"There's no escape, Ruka!" she teased and giggled. Then she took her shampoo again in her hands and tried to reach the tall girl who winced away quickly.

"Guess it's better for me to wait outside and..."

"Why? To get a cold? And then it'd be my fault. No, Hime-chan would never forgive me if I'd be the reason for you getting ill." Michiru giggled and soon her hands were full with a pink fluid. "Hime-chan would kill me. You're all she's been talking about the past days." With a quick motion Haruka hadn't expected stepped Michiru on her tiptoes and grabbed for blond strands. Soon Haruka's head was covered with her shampoo and there was no way to escape. Michiru stood right between her and the door and she didn't look as if she wanted to let the taller girl go.

"Please, don't..."

Nani?

Michiru raised her head and looked into terrified green eyes. In a pale face. She saw how Haruka swallowed and felt the body trembling next to her.

"Hey, what's up, you fast swimmer? Has your hair never been washed by someone?" It was meant as a joke but as Michiru saw how Haruka's eyes grew wide, as she felt how the taller girl clenched her fists she understood.

No one ever washed your hair?

She didn't dare to ask it aloud but she knew the answer when she looked into Haruka's pale face. Saw the sad expression in it. Michiru couldn't imagine; her mother had loved to take her cute little Michi-chan into the huge tub and to wash her hair. There were still photos with a laughing little girl whose sea green hair had been covered all over and over with foam. She was holding a plastic dolphin which could swim on the water's surface in her tiny hands.

Mommy...

Michiru sighed slightly and her first hectic motions became slower and softer. Carefully, she stroked through blond strands and soon Haruka's head was covered with white foam.

She's trembling.

"Are you cold?"

Quickly, Michiru turned around and within the next minute nice warm water was pouring down on them. Filling the cabin with steam and warmth they both seemed to have missed during the past months.

"Little bit." Answered Haruka. Her voice was nothing more than a whisper.

What is she doing?

She didn't dare to move as Michiru took again the shampoo and started again to stroke her hair. Even if it was in vain under the warm rain. Haruka sighed deeply and simply gave up. She leaned against the cold tiles and closed her eyes.

Whatever she does, it feels so damn good.

Haruka couldn't remember the last time someone had touched her so gently. So carefully. So calmingly. She lowered her head and Michiru stroked again through her blond strands and started to caress her neck; her back under the black t-shirt that pasted to her body like a second skin. Michiru took her hands and forced her with soft powers to destroy the wall she was hiding behind. Soon the arms hang beside her body and weren't crossed any longer before her chest. Haruka blushed slightly but suddenly she knew that there was no reason any longer to be ashamed of her female body.

Michi isn't offended by it.

Again she felt the soft hands running through her mop of hair.

"Arigato that you saved Hime-chan."

"She told you about it?" Haruka's voice was shaky and she took a deep breath.

I want to touch her. To wash her hair, too.

But she didn't dare to raise her hands. To move. So she simply kept leaning against the now warm wall behind her, enjoying the gentlest touches she'd ever experienced.

"Of course. You're her hero, don't you know, Ruka?" Michiru's giggle filled the air. A happy noise Haruka could listen to all the time.

Ruka...

So soft hands let go of her hair after another long time both girls couldn't define if it had been only minutes or hours. Haruka bit on her lower lip and tried not to show her disappointment. The next moment she gasped hard for breath as she felt those soft hands under her dark t-shirt. Stroking over her slim belly. Her eyes flew open and she looked into a tenderly smiling, blushed face of the sea beauty.

Water was falling down. Warm water. But suddenly Haruka was very hot. She blinked, but didn't dare to move as Michiru's hands made their ways up on her body. Over goose flesh. Slowly, but determinedly. Automatically, the tall girl held her breath and stared like hypnotised into deep blue eyes which were as deep as the ocean.

What is she doing?

Michiru looked up to her and her smile grew wider.

And that shall be the freak everyone is afraid of? Are they all really so blind to overlook the sensible, hurt girl behind the rough facade? Don't they see how much she needs a friend, too? That all she wants are peace and love. Just like we all do!

Her hands stopped some inches under Haruka's breast which seemed to grow bigger under the black t-shirt. The two girls looked each other deep into the eyes and it seemed as if they wanted to tell each other something.

The next moment Haruka burst out into loud laughter.

"Michi...!" she gasped and tried to escape the smaller girl who used her chance to tickle the taller one. But there was no chance of escaping. Still the door was far away and the ground of the cabin very slippery. Still Haruka trembled too much to be stronger than the smaller girl. Not even the pain flashing through her shoulder could clear her thoughts.

"Michi... please..." she laughed but Michiru had no mercy. The grin on her face grew wider as she pressed the taller girl against the wall and tickled her even more.

She looks so different when she's laughing.

Now Michiru had to giggle, too, and her powers were leaving her quickly.

She looks cute...

At that moment Haruka could escape. But only for some seconds. To open the cabin door and to stumble outside into the empty bathroom. But a giggling Michiru hunted her. Both of them laughed as they ran over the slippery ground. They switched on all the showers by passing by and soon the whole bathroom was filled with steam.

"You won't get me!" shouted Haruka and a happy smile was on her now redden face as she turned around. Michiru almost got her - but then she escaped her again. Maybe the smaller girl was the fastest one in the water - Haruka was still the fasted one outside.

"Don't waste your hopes. I'll get you. That's for sure!" gasped an excited giggling Michiru and grabbed Haruka's right arm. Again pain flashed through Haruka's body and so it was easy for the sea beauty to overpower her. They both laughed again and their happy voices filled the whole bathroom. It sounded like they were in a huge cave. Their voices were reflected from the wet walls. They both lost balance and landed on the wet tiles.

Michiru screamed as she landed on Haruka and for some seconds they both froze in motion as their bodies touched.

"Did I hurt you?" asked the sea beauty concerned and tried to get away, but this time Haruka held her hands determinedly tight.

"No." She answered and tried to get her personal revenge. To tickle Michiru, too. But again the smaller girl was faster and stronger than the pain in Haruka's shoulder. So it was again the wild tomboy who laid helplessly under an excitedly giggling Michiru and could do nothing than to laugh and to plead for mercy.

I wish she would laugh more often.

Michiru looked into a smiling face, into sparkling green eyes.

"Michiru?"

They didn't notice how the door was pushed open. Nor did they notice that more lights were switched on. But they both winced wildly as they heard the silent, shocked voice. They both frowned and turned their heads. And looked into surprised eyes. Immediately, Haruka's laughter died away.

Don't stop being so happy!

But Michiru knew that Haruka wouldn't be so happy again. Not when Yakoto stood next to them and stared down at them in disbelieve.

"What's wrong, Yakoto?" asked Michiru and rose. She wanted to help Haruka up, but the taller girl only slapped her hand away and went over to the still open cabin without looking back. Suddenly, she didn't look any happy at all. Suddenly, she looked very tired and sad.

And alone..

Michiru wanted to go over to her. To embrace her again. To hold her again tightly in her arms. To wash again those soft strands. But she knew that she wouldn't. Not now.

"You wanted to give me your homework, don't you remember, Michiru?" Yakoto frowned and watched Haruka, too. But she didn't say anything.

She's not like Mila. But she's someone who keeps silent when other people shout at her. Because she's frightened.

Michiru took a deep breath.

And why do I keep silent? Am I frightened, too? What of?

"It's in my schoolbag. In my sketchbook." Michiru bit on her lower lip and turned around to see how Haruka silently closed the cabin's door behind her. The smaller woman frowned as she saw the red fluid running down a pale arm. The next second the door was closed and Michiru asked herself if it hadn't been an illusion. If it had been just a trick of the light. Just the shadows in the cabin.

I have to ask her later.

"Come, Yakoto. I'll show it to you." Michiru sighed deeply and followed a still very shocked looking girl over to the changing room.

There she waited over an hour after Yakoto was gone. When she went back into the bathroom, the shower was still working. But there was no sight of Haruka anymore. Nor of her clothes she had laid down in an extra room so that no one would have to see her getting dressed.

Sadly, Michiru stood in the empty bathroom and wrapped her arms protectively around her waist.

Why didn't you wait?

The longer she searched for a suitable answer the more she knew why.

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I have often dreamed of a far-off place

where a great warm welcome will be waiting for me.

Again she sat on the sill. Staring out of the window. Into the night's darkness. Soft music filled the air around her headphones. She turned it a little bit louder as the noise increased above her. But today she didn't think about the woman and all her lovers. This night she didn't think about her father. This night she didn't think about the fear she felt almost for two years - before he finally left without a sign.

This night she only thought about a beautiful girl who had been so nice to her. As nice as no one ever had been. This night she only saw deep blue eyes who looked friendly up to her. There was no disgust, no anger in them. No endless, incredible hate. Again she saw the sea green hair surrounding a smiling face while the girl swam like a fish in the clear water. Laughing happily.

Like a sea goddess...

Haruka swallowed hard and leaned her head against the cold pane. She sighed slightly and closed her eyes while the music filled her world. A world she wanted so badly to share with someone else. But until today no one had wanted to see it.

Until today...

Haruka raised her left hand and stroked thoughtfully through her now dry blond hair. Still, she could feel the soft hands stroking through those strands. Still, she could hear the high, happy voice in her ears. Still, she could smell the shampoo's scent.

Michi's scent...

A thin smile appeared on a normally pale face as Haruka opened her eyes again and looked up to the sky. Sparkling stars were reflected in her dark green eyes but all she saw was a sea beauty who obviously liked her.

I like her, too.

Haruka sighed slightly and turned the cassette. Her walkman was old, very old, but still it worked. That was all that counted. And as long as she had an adapter she could use it without buying expensive batteries.

I like her very much.

Again she felt how Michiru's hands crept under her wet t-shirt. How they caressed tenderly over her slim belly. Again Haruka heard her fast heart beat in her mind, felt how her whole body started to tremble. Haruka lowered her head and her smile grew wider.

She remembered too well how great the desire had been to take the giggling girl by her side again in her strong arms. Not only to comfort her because of the loss of her parents. But also to...

To what?

Haruka frowned.

To what?

She didn't find an answer. But she knew that she had liked the feeling of being touched so gently. Of being tickled and being teased around so softly. Of being a real friend.

Is she really a friend?

Haruka closed her tired eyes and turned on the walkman. Soon music filled her ears again, her whole world while she slowly settled into sleep.

A real friend. Is that enough?

While the sun slowly started to rise dreamed the tall girl a wonderful dream. A dream she wished to never end again. A dream she shared with a smaller girl who would never leave her again.

And a voice keeps saying:

this is where I'm meant to be...

dbdbdb

"Noodles!" screamed the little girl and waved her spoon as the waitress brought them their dinner.

"Then let's eat." Smiled Michiru and looked happily into shinning dark eyes.

"Hai!" Hotaru started immediately to extinguish innocent Italian food while her aunt watched her thoughtfully. Again the little girl's father was still at work. There had been another emergency at the hospital and he was needed. So he called them up and told them that he wouldn't come home before midnight. Hotaru looked very disappointed, but she cheered up as Michiru declared that they'd go to a nice Italian restaurant to eat dinner.

It's just been a few days that Haruka sat there...

Michiru sighed silently as she remembered a loudly laughing girl beneath her. Again she saw the big green eyes who looked at her dreamily while she caressed a too slim belly. Again she saw the sad expression when she asked if anyone had ever washed her hair before.

Doesn't she have a mother who takes care of her? She's too slim and her clothes are too thin for late autumn.

But somehow she didn't dare to ask Haruka.

Why not? What are you afraid of? Of her answer?

Michiru shook her head. Today Haruka had been at school as normal as always. She kept silently to herself during the lessons, wrote in her books as the teachers told them and tried to understand what the English poems told them about Shakespeare. Again she sat down under the tree to eat an old apple. Again she didn't want to talk to any other pupil - except Michiru who joined her in her lunch break to share a bento with her.

Every time she looks so surprised when I give her the bento. As if she expects that I wouldn't want to talk to her any more.

The sea beauty took her fork but she wasn't hungry at all.

I told her that I am her friend now. Doesn't she trust me?

"It's delishish." Said Hotaru with her mouth fill with noodles. Her mouth was red and her white sweatshirt covered with red spots.

She looks like a healthy child.

But Michiru knew too well how many pills the small girl had to take before she went to bed every evening.

"And your fish?" Askingly, Hotaru looked at the still untouched trout before she took her coke and drank some gulps.

"Fine." Answered Michiru and ate some tiny bits. She smiled tenderly at her niece who helped more and more noodles to go to the noodle's paradise - her stomach. Michiru's smile broke as she saw how three girls entered the Italian restaurant. They didn't look very happy.

"You shouldn't talk to her any longer!"

Three girls stood suddenly next to the small table and they crossed their arms determinedly before their chests.

"Hello Mila, Susan and Yakoto." Said Michiru and swallowed hard. She knew whom the girls meant but she didn't want to understand why they disturbed her dinner.

Surely, they couldn't talk to me at school while Ruka was by my side. Because they all say that she has a very bad temper and that she easily beats other people when she's angry.

Michiru frowned but still she smiled at the three girls.

She never ever tried to hurt me. All she did was to comfort me...

"Why don't you sit down?" Michiru turned around and signalled the waiter that they needed three more chairs. One minute later the girls sat next to her at the table.

"Do you want something to drink? A tea maybe? It's very cold outside." Michiru turned again to call the waiter, but Mila only waved her hand to stop her. The other girl shook her head while Yakoto blushed deeply. She didn't look as if she wanted to sit here.

"You're a nice, beautiful girl, Michiru. You're popular at our school and we're all your friends." Started Mila with a cold voice that let Michiru shiver.

Really? You're my friend? Didn't notice.

But the sea green haired girl smiled while her fork played with her fish. The meal was already cold but she didn't care. She wasn't hungry.

"We, that means, Yakoto saw you yesterday with the Tenô girl in the showers and..." Michiru frowned as Yakoto lowered her head and blushed even more. As if she hadn't told this fact voluntarily to the others. "... and because you're new at school and because you haven't known her as long as we do, we came here to warn you." Mila's smile reminded Michiru suddenly of a snake. The other girl, Susan, whose father was an American politician who married a Japanese woman, wore a similar mask. Only Yakoto looked as if she wanted to jump up and ran away.

"We've know her for over 4 years now..."

"For over 8 years..." whispered Yakoto and suddenly tears shimmered in her light eyes. "We went together to school since our first school day..."

"We, Susan and I, have know her for over 4 years when we changed to this school." Interrupted her Mila, ignoring the other girl. "And we know that she's a liar. Maybe she says she's your friend now, but to tell you the truth, she only wants to hurt you. She often beats other people and shouts at them."

Michiru frowned. Suddenly, she saw again a motionless Haruka who stared at the rude guys on their motorbikes with sad eyes. Who didn't even wince when the bottle of bear missed her only for some inches and crashed next to her on the icy ground.

"She has no matters and surely she will hurt you when you don't take care of yourself, Michiru. We all know what she is and if you don't run away quickly, she will rape you."

Again Michiru felt soft arms being wrapped around her waist. Holding her gently while she cried for her death parents. For her so suddenly ending childhood. For a future she would now never experience.

"Do you really think so?" she whispered and Mila's eyes started to sparkle angrily.

"Don't you see it? The clothes she wears, the boy's uniform. And then her hair. It's too short for a girl. Hell, she has bad grades, Michiru. She is under your level. You have the right to have better friends!"

Susan nodded agreeingly while Yakoto only took a deep breath. It sounded like a sob.

"Haruka is a good friend. I don't think that she lies to me. I've always known my friends quite well." Explained Michiru and turned around to eat something from her fish. Mila leaned forwards and grabbed her hand to push her away from her dinner. The sea green haired girl looked up and raised her eyebrows.

"Maybe you're so blind, but she's a lesbian. She doesn't look for a friend. She looks for a whore - and you aren't one, Michiru!"

Very nice that I am not a whore, Mila!

Michiru shook her head and the fork landed on the white tablecloth.

"We only want to warn you. You don't know her as well as we do. And she's a dyke. She only brings you bad luck and you're too talented to throw your life away like that."

"So you know her." Answered Michiru and her voice was suddenly very insensible. She didn't see how Hotaru stopped to eat. How she raised her head and how her dark eyes were big. How the small girl stared at Mila with a suddenly pale face.

"For over four years, she's..."

"What is a lesbian?" asked a high voice and four girls winced surprised. It seemed as if Mila would see the girl just at that moment for the first time.

"Auntie Michi?" The fear on Hotaru's innocent face was driving her crazy. She tried to think of any explanations she could tell a five year old girl, but Mila was faster than her. Determinedly, she looked down into dark eyes while she told little Hotaru her opinion.

"A lesbian is someone who isn't normal. Who's crazy. Who hurts other people and only thinks of her own. Who beats other people and who likes no one at all."

Hotaru frowned and swallowed hard. Suddenly tears shimmered in her dark eyes and she looked again like a little, very ill girl. Like a child who lost something really important just two seconds ago. Or someone...

"Mila!" snapped Michiru and tried to get up. To take Mila's arm and show her the door. But she didn't count on her niece's anger.

"You don't know her!" screamed the little girl suddenly and jumped from her seat. She held her coke in her hands and the next moment Mila's school uniform was wetted. "Ruka's my best friend!" shouted the little girl angrily and she started to cry. For another time Michiru saw helplessly how the little girl went on her knees and started to choke. As if she would asphyxiate. Tears ran over pale cheeks and her shoulder long dark hair covered her face in deep shadows.

"Hime-chan!" Michiru pushed a raging Mila aside and knelt down besides the little girl. Carefully, she took her niece into her arms and rocked her calmingly.

"Everything is okay." She whispered and covered dark hair with tiny kisses. "Everything's okay, princess."

"Everything okay? Look at my uniform! The skirt is ruined forever!" growled Mila and stood up. Her eyes sparkled furiously and Susan stood right beside her. She had her fists clenched, too. Only Yakoto kept sitting on her chair, staring sadly into the now empty coke class.

"Do you know how expensive it was? It was..."

"And it was the last they had. Now we have to go to the tailor!"

"Your bloody brat!"

"Small girls shouldn't go into restaurants!"

"I can't believe..."

"SHUT UP!" Michiru took Hotaru in her arms and rose. She looked at them and shook her head. "You want to be my friends and make my niece frightened?" The sea green haired girl felt how two tiny arms were wrapped around her neck and how Hotaru buried her face into her shoulder.

"You should be ashamed of yourself!" Michiru searched in her pockets and handled Mila a big note. "Guess it's enough for a whole new uniform. And now go! When you're so rude to my niece you can't stay here." The sea beauty took a deep breath. "You're always welcome again when you know to control your thoughts, your words and your temper!"

Mila stepped closer and grabbed the note. Their noses almost touched as she looked into determinedly shinning blue eyes.

"We only wanted to help." She declared and her voice was icy.

"And I only want to protect my niece. She's my family."

"After your parents death. Must be depressing to have such a strange family."

Michiru bit on her lower lip but didn't respond anything. She knew that Mila's parents were divorced and that her family situation was even stranger than Michiru's. But she didn't say a word, because she wasn't as mean as that girl.

"We only wanted to warn you." Said Susan and took her scarf out of her jacket. "Guess it's better to go now, Mila."

"Hai." Still Mila stared into Michiru's angry eyes and shook her head in disbelieve. "Do you really want to be that dyke's victim? Do you really want that she misuses your friendship? You're very rich and popular Michiru. Look at Haruka's clothes. She's poor and one day she'll ask you for money. You will never get it back. Instead she'll take you, too. She'll take you and break you!"

With those words she turned around and left the Italian restaurant. Susan followed her. Michiru shook her head as she saw the waiter's concerned face and sighed deeply. Hotaru cried desperately at her shoulder and she rocked her calmingly. Trying to comfort her.

"Everything's right, princess." She said and sat down again. For a short moment she stared at her untouched fish and put it aside.

"I hate them." Whimpered Hotaru and cried even more. Michiru sighed and stroked through dark hair that felt like velvet.

"They're gone now, princess. There's nothing to fear."

"But Ruka... Ruka's my best friend."

"Hai, she is." Michiru smiled tenderly and kissed a small forehead.

"She would never.. never be rude..."

"No, she would never, princess."

Michiru rocked her niece tenderly and the small girl calmed slowly down.

"That's Haruka only two years ago." Whispered Yakoto and Michiru raised surprised her head. She hadn't noticed that the third girl was still sitting on her chair. That she hadn't followed Mila. That she simply kept silent and watched them thoughtfully. Michiru blinked and stared at a photo Yakoto put in front of her on the table. It showed a young girl of thirteen, maybe fourteen years. Her blond hair wwas shoulder long and curly. She wore the similar school uniform for girls and showed cheekily her legs under the short skirt. A happy smile was on her face.

Nani?

Michiru frowned as she saw dark green eyes looking to the one who took the photo. Dark green eyes the young violinist would have recognized everywhere.

"We went together to the hairdresser to get a perm." Yakoto giggled but it sounded very sad. "I've known Haruka since we were small. We went to school from the first year on and after school we learned together hard and complicate math and Japanese. My mother helped us and she was a good girl. Maybe not the best, but she had never had such bad grades she has now." Yakoto sighed deeply. "She was a very good friend of mine and we had a lot of fun. The other pupils liked her, too, although she could be very cheeky. Hai, she had a hot temper, but as quick as she was angry as quick was she calm again."

"What happened?" asked Michiru and took the photo in her right hand while stroking with the left one still over Hotaru's dark hair.

"I don't know. It's been now two years that she came back from the summer break. I was in Europe with my parents, in Greek. So I hadn't seen her all summer." Yakoto shook slightly her head. "She cut her hair and there were no curls anymore. She refused to wear any skirts or dresses any longer and somehow she got the boy's uniform. She had always been a good athlete, but suddenly she was unbreakable. She trained a lot - and didn't learn for the other lessons at all. She shouted at everyone and suddenly everyone who liked her hated her. Mila had been one of her best friends, too. Guess that's why she hates her now so much. She's disappointed that someone misused her friendship and she only wants to spare you this experience, because she adores you, Michiru. You're rich, beautiful and talented. Mila once heard your violin play and she simply doesn't want that the same happens to you."

Michiru frowned, still looking at a happy smiling girl who obviously liked it to be a girl.

"You simply couldn't talk to her any longer and... well... pupils can be mean. So they started to..."

"To shout at her."

Yakoto sighed and nodded. Then she put the photo again in her handbag and shrugged her shoulders.

"I've never dared to ask her what happened. The others thought that she finally found out that she's a lesbian and that this is the way to behave like a lesbian." Yakoto shook her head and saw how Michiru swallowed hard. "I don't believe them. My older sister has a girlfriend and they're very nice to me, to their friends and to each other. But... I am too frightened to ask her. It's hard to be an outcast - especially at school. So I left her in peace - that's what she always wanted to be. To be alone."

I understand you, Yakoto. But the same time I can't understand you at all.

Michiru remembered again too well how the other pupils had reacted when she had been told to sit down next to the tall girl who had tried to read the newspaper. Who had tried to escape their rude words. Who had simply tried to be somewhere else where no one could hurt her.

"Maybe you're able to ask - and to understand her one day. Maybe she won't push you away and shout at you as she did with us."

Because I won't hit her back.

Michiru swallowed and frowned.

"I can't remember the last time I saw her laughing. Haruka used to laugh loud and a lot, but the last two years she didn't show any feelings."

She's able to show a lot of feelings. If you look closer. If you let her show them. If you don't turn away before she says anything.

"How did you do that, Michiru? How did you make her laugh?" asked Yakoto and looked suddenly very busy on her watch. Surely, she had to be at home at a certain time and it was already too late, because Mila and Susan convinced her that it was her task to go to the Italian restaurant to rescue the new, talented, rich pupil.

Michiru frowned and held her now sleeping niece a little bit tighter.

"I tickled her."

dbdbdb

She rose from her bed in a hurry. Her eyes were wide open, her mouth formed to a silent scream. Her hands trembled and she knocked over her lamp. She jumped out of the blankets which seemed to be too hot with a sudden. Excitedly, she slammed on the wall until she found the button to switch on the light. It brightened up the room, but still she felt threatened. The night outside seemed to be too dark, the wind seemed to be too rough. And the rain crashing against the window pane sounded like little stones crashing against glass. Glass that could easily break.

Damn!

Michiru wrapped her arms around her waist and her entire body started to tremble. Tears burned in her deep blue eyes and she sobbed silently. She didn't want to wake anyone up - especially not her niece. But the nightmare had been too real.

Again that damn nightmare!

Michiru swallowed hard and lowered her head. Now the tears ran over her pale face, meeting no resistance. She felt suddenly ill and stumbled over to her bathroom. There she switched on the lights, too. But she didn't dare to look into the mirror.

Again that damn nightmare!

The tiles were cold under her naked feet but she didn't care. Again she saw the policeman standing in front of the door. Again she heard the ringing of the bell and then the impatient knocking against wood. Again she read the newspapers, heard the news on TV.

Again that damn nightmare!

But she knew that it wasn't only a silly nightmare. She wished, she prayed that it would have been just a bad dream, but every night she awoke past midnight she felt that she was in a strange bed. That she lived now in a room that was not hers. That she moved to this part of Tokyo so that she wouldn't be forced to hear the rushes of the sea outside. To hope that her father's soft piano play would fill the silent night again. To hope that her mother's voice would accompany him and sing one tender love song after another which he only wrote for her.

Every night she dreamed of them her nightmares became realer and realer. Now she could almost hear the crackle of the fire. Now she could almost smell the scent of burning metal, of exploding gas. Now she could almost see her parents angry and determined faces. And since last week they had been afraid, too.

Had they been frightened before they decided not to brake?

Michiru swallowed hard again and the nausea increased inside her stomach. Suddenly, the bathroom seemed to be filled with smoke. The smoke of a burning car. With two dead bodies in it...

"No..."

She sobbed as she had sobbed every night - in vain. The sea green haired girl knelt down before the toilet. Wet strands fell in her face, but she didn't notice them. Nor did she notice that her white night dress was wet and pasted to her sweaty, shaking body.

"Why...?"

But she knew the answer too well. Although she couldn't understand it. Although she couldn't accept it. Although she simply wouldn't realize that it had been the last way out for them. For her father to die in honour and for her mother to love him forever.

And what about me? Why did they simply leave me? Why...

Again she saw her mother at that morning. How she made her coffee and looked with a strange look at her daughter Michiru had never seen before on her mother's tired face. How she stroked through her sea green strands and smiled down at her child. And only said one sentence.

You're so young Michiru.

Then, one hour later she left the light house by the sea. And never came back again.

"You simply... left me behind..." choked Michiru and it got harder and harder to breathe. The steam seemed to get thicker and she seized hard on the toilet's rim. Her whole world spun around and she believed to fall. A long way down. No one was there to hold her. To take her back to the normal world. Only falling... without a ground to reach.

Michiru choked again and leaned over the toilet. Then she threw up the few things she ate for dinner. After the girls and even Yakoto disappeared Michiru asked the waiter to get their dinners warm again. But still she wasn't very hungry and Hotaru had been too tired. The little girl only wanted to go home and when they finally arrived at the huge house helped Michiru her niece into her pyjamas and brought her to bed. The little girl was so tired, she didn't even want to hear a fairy tale.

Guess she's still sleeping.

Michiru's uncle came home very late, but the sea green haired girl didn't dare to stand up and ask him for help. Because there was no help for her problems.

I can't ask him to listen to my problems, he has enough of his own.

Michiru knew too well how desperate the doctor had been after his wife died because of a tragic accident. Hotaru almost lost her life, too. But she could be rescued - and since that very day she was very ill. The consequences of the accident. Too many smoke, too much fire. Too many wounds. Too many scars that wouldn't heal so easily.

We all should be grateful that she's still alive.

Her lung had taken a bad damage, too, and so she had to take a lot of medicine.

That's why she has attacks whenever she gets too excited...

Michiru lowered her head again and sat down on the soft carpet that covered the bathroom's ground. She brought her legs to her upper part of her body and wrapped her arms around her knees.

I wish I could help them.

Again she swallowed hard and more tears ran silently over her pale face. Her whole body trembled and she froze like hell. But she didn't notice it. She pressed her eyelids hard together and whispered the text of a song her mother once sung for her whenever she felt sad. Whenever she had a nightmare. Whenever she was frightened that a monster would do her harm - or that a monster would do her parents any harm.

I wish I could help me, too.

"Sailor Neptune."

At first, she thought that the voice was only an illusion of her tired mind. Of her crazy thoughts spinning around in her dizzy mind.

"Sailor Neptune."

The voice was high, but it sounded older. Maybe of a young woman about twenty five or twenty six. It reminded her a little bit of Kaori, her uncle's assistance. But that voice was tender, calming. Not like Kaori's. Michiru didn't like the red haired woman and as she got to know soon after she came to this house Hotaru hated her. Before Michiru's parents died Kaori took care of the household - and of Hotaru, too. But after Michiru declared that she would take those tasks voluntarily and Kaori should take again care of her uncle's laboratory Hotaru got happier. She loved her new aunt, no, she adored her. Michiru was nice to her and made her laugh. She was so different from Kaori would never leave her alone when the little girl was frightened and alone.

Once Hotaru told Michiru that she was afraid of the dark. Kaori only laughed while Michiru bought Hotaru a small music box that shimmered in the night's darkness.

I love her.

Michiru sighed deeply. She didn't know if she would want to have children one day. But if she would ever become a mother she wished her child to be like her Hime-chan.

Even if she's too small for her age and very sick, she's still the cutest child I know.

Now Michiru smiled as she remembered Mila's shocked face as Hotaru stood up and splashed her with her coke. How the small girl screamed at the rude pupil and declared that her Ruka was her best friend.

Guess that's something Mila will never forget again.

The sea beauty clenched her fists.

Just like me...

"Sailor Neptune?"

Again that soft voice. It remembered her of her mother. How had she sung a little lullaby each evening. When she had been a small child, too. When she had still felt safe and secure. In the crazy believe that her parents would never ever leave her alone.

Michiru swallowed hard and raised slowly her head. And gasped for breath. And stared in disbelieve at the young woman standing right in front of her.

Standing? She's floating.

The appearance wore a white dress and she seemed to glow. Like the moon which was covered with thick clouds this night. Long, golden hair almost touched the ground. A small crown sparkled on her head like diamonds as she floated towards the still sitting girl. Blue eyes were filled with tears as she saw all the pain and the sorrow in Michiru's face.

"Sailor Neptune..." whispered the young woman and stretched her hand to touch the sea green curls. But Michiru winced away and swallowed hard.

"Who are you?" she whispered and asked herself if she was going crazy. If her uncle would call the ambulance the next day and if she would spend the rest of her life in a hospital. In a white room with soft walls. Wearing a nice, cute, white jacket.

"Don't be afraid, Sailor Neptune. I am your future Queen." Answered the person and Michiru frowned. Was she still sleeping? Was that another nightmare? Would soon the door to her sleeping room open and the police man would enter it? Would she be doomed to look again out of the window and see the cliff with a burning car lying beneath?

"Sure. And I am a princess and you came to me to ask me to save the world." Said Michiru with irony in her voice and slowly came to her feet. Her legs trembled and she was still feeling very, very ill. But there was nothing left in her stomach she could have thrown up, too. So she went over to her sleeping room and tried hard not to fall down on the soft carpet.

"You already know your destiny? Who told you about it?" asked the young woman surprised and followed her.

"Nani?" Michiru spun around and stared at the appearance in blank horror. "I shall save the world?"

"Hai. That's your destiny. Together with your partner, Sailor Uranus. It's your task to search for the talismans and to help my daughter to become a great senshi. Still she doesn't know about her future yet, but once she knows she'll need you. The both of you."

Michiru gasped for breath as she saw the golden staff floating in front of the young woman's stretched hands. It shimmered in all colours of the rainbow and there was a sea green jewel on it's top.

"Just take it, Sailor Neptune. And you'll know everything about your task. About your past and about your future."

About my past?

Michiru blinked and stepped some inches away until she felt the rim of her bed.

About my past? I know how my past was! I still remember how I opened the door and saw the police man standing outside. I know too well that they're dead. I can very well remember all the news in the papers and on TV!

"About my past?" she whispered and shook her head.

"Hai. How you lived on Neptune as a princess and..." The young woman screamed as a pillow hit the staff. It landed with a muffled sound on the ground.

"Nani?" Big blue eyes looked at the pale girl in shock who was standing in front of her. "But you're..."

"I am Kaioh Michiru and I know very well how my past had been. How my last four weeks had been. How great it was to take care of their funeral. To stand in an empty house and to know that I'll never hear them coming home again. I know my past too well. And I know my future, you silly queen! I'll keep going. Without them. I'll try to make my music and maybe one day I'll be able to live without them. One day..." She sobbed and another pillow hit the shinning person.

"Maybe I am becoming completely insane now, but I know that I am surely not a princess. And I won't save this bloody world. I have enough problems than to search for any stupid jewels. If you want talismans, go to the market and buy two." Michiru grabbed for the blanket and put it over the shinning woman who started loud to scream because she couldn't see anything any more.

"Thanks for that offer, queen, but I am not the one you're looking for. I am not born on a far away planet and I am surely not the one to save a world I am hating right now." Michiru took a deep breath. "It's very hard to live, queen. To keep going on every day. To get up every morning. To endure these nightmares every night. I am not strong enough to save anything." Suddenly Michiru's voice was nothing more than a sob. A screamed sob.

"And now just leave me in peace! Why can't everyone just leave me in peace? I've sacrificed enough in my life. Do you hear me? It's enough now! It's over. Finally over! I only want to live and not to be reminded..."

With those words she turned around and left her room, running. Tears wetted her cheeks, but she didn't notice them as she slammed the door right behind her.

"Oh..." now the light appearance was able to free herself from the blanket. She threw it on the ground next to the pillows. Of course she had expected that the future senshi of the wide ocean would ask her a lot of questions. That she wouldn't believe her first - until she touched her henshin. But she hadn't expected to be attacked by pillows and other stuff.

"There's so much pain on this world." Whispered the young woman and bowed to fetch up the golden staff. Thoughtfully, she looked at it and tears shimmered in her light blue eyes. "I wish I could change it. I wish I could help you. But I can't. Not now. Not in the way you wished me to do." Deeply she sighed and put the staff to another one she was carrying, too. It had a golden jewel on the top and the queen suspected that she wouldn't have more success with the other outer senshi.

"But you have to accept your destiny. To be a sailor senshi is your fate, Neptune. It's your mission to search for the talismans and to protect this world - and to help my little daughter."

The appearance wiped away her tears and suddenly a tender smile was on her face.

"You can't run away, Neptune. Because no one can escape one's destiny. You'll accept it one day and I'll help you to accept it sooner than later."

The next moment the young woman vanished and all that remained was a small whisper that was carried away by the wind who blew through the suddenly opened window.

"But don't be afraid, Neptune. You won't be alone on your mission..."

dbdbdb

The last paper.

Haruka yawned tiredly and tried to wrap herself deeper into her old pullover. However, it didn't hold back the bitter cold nor the cold rain falling down. It had started about two hours ago to rain and the tall woman was wet all over.

Just get home and try to dry my clothes.

Again Haruka yawned and shivered. Her bag was now empty and she had carried out all the pamphlets of the huge mall that would open next week. Right in the centre of Tokyo. She read in the newspaper that they searched people to carry out small papers which showed the people what they could buy in the new shopping centre and when it exactly opened. Haruka asked if she could help and they really took her. It wasn't very much what she earned per paper but it was enough to get by - at least for the next week. This night she earned enough to buy her food the next week and when she found another job to earn enough for the rent she would be very happy.

But this job is not forever. Only this week until the mall has opened.

But it was a ray of hope.

Her stomach started to rumble and she searched in her pockets for a roll she bought right before she started her new job. Now she bit into it and chewed slowly. So that it would last for some more moments.

I wish I weren't that poor.

Haruka held her empty bag tighter and sighed slightly. She turned around the corner and decided to take a short cut. It wasn't the best street of Tokyo and once her mother had warned her not to go to this place. But she wasn't in danger. She had no money and no one attacked someone who obviously looked like a tall boy.

I am as fast as the wind.

Even if they tried she'd run away and they wouldn't catch her. No one had the slightest chance to beat her.

Only Michiru was able to beat me - in the water.

But Haruka knew that she didn't lose the fight. No, she didn't lose it. To be honest to herself she had to admit that she won it - together with the sea green haired beauty. Because without Michiru she wouldn't have been that fast at all. She wouldn't have had the power to keep swimming - even with her hurting shoulder. Without her she wouldn't have had the will to carry on.

So she went through the dirty street while the rain still poured down on her. Her shoes were wet, too, and her feet were very cold.

Still I didn't finish the math homework.

And she knew that she wouldn't find any time during the rest of the weekend, too. She wanted to ask in different shops for work and if she found one there wouldn't be any time left to learn. Haruka sighed deeply and wondered if she'd ask Michiru before class to copy it.

Surely, she'll look disappoint but she'll give it to me at least.

A thin smile appeared on Haruka's face as she thought of how Michiru had insisted to learn Japanese culture with her when she hadn't had enough time to make the last homework. She had been allowed to copy it, but after school Michiru had taken her to a small restaurant and they had learned half of the afternoon while they drank a hot tea and ate pancakes.

She paid the food.

Haruka sighed deeply. It was at the end of November and she wanted to give Michiru something for Christmas. But she simply didn't have the money to buy anything.

Hope she doesn't think that I am misusing her, because she's always the one paying the bills.

On the other side Michiru was always the one who grabbed her sleeve and pulled her into the next café and declared that she was hungry and that she felt guilty when she ate all alone. Therefore, she simply ordered something to eat and Haruka had to eat at least half of it.

Sometimes these meals were the only meals Haruka ate for days.

When I go to the mall tomorrow I'll get some money.

The smile on Haruka's face broke.

But it will never be enough to invite her instead.

"Hey, small one. Do you want a little bit fun?" asked suddenly a high voice next to her. Haruka raised her head and looked directly into a pale face. The young woman used too much make up and she was obviously freezing. With hungry eyes she looked at the roll in Haruka's hands and tried to smile. But she failed. Her skirt was too short and she didn't wear any tights. Her jacket was wide open and Haruka could see the breast right through the red shirt. It was too thin, too.

"It's raining and so it'll be a little bit cheaper for you this night." Smiled the freezing young woman and her blond hair which used to be black when she was younger fell wet on her shoulders. Maybe she was only 20 or even younger, but the look in her dark eyes was so much older. Empty. Lost.

Just like me...

Haruka swallowed hard. She knew what the young woman did on this dirty street in the back of Tokyo.

"No." Whispered Haruka and held the empty bag tighter. She wanted to go on but the look in dark eyes held her back. "Why don't you go home? It's past midnight and I am sure that no one will visit you tonight."

The young woman sighed deeply and searched in her jacket for cigarettes. Haruka only shook her head as she offered her one.

"Don't think wrong of me, lad. It's not that I want to do this forever." She lit her cigarette and inhaled the smoke. Haruka blinked but didn't cough. She was used to cigarettes. Her mother had smoked all of her life and after her father went away it got worse and worse. But still the bitter scent made the tall girl feeling very sick.

Of course, no one wants to do this forever. Everyone tries to escape this bloody life.

"My little boy is very sick and the doctors told me that the operation will be very expensive." Told her the young woman and lit another cigarette after she threw the last one half burned in a puddle.

Everyone has one's own personal reason.

Haruka sighed and nodded slightly.

"And you're sure that you don't want to..."

A sad smile appeared on Haruka's face as she shook determinedly her head.

"No." She wrapped her arms before her freezing body and the soft clothes stretched over her chest. The other woman's dark eyes grew wide as she saw the breasts under the old, worn out pullover.

"Oh, don't worry. I've already done it with women and so..."

"How old are you?" asked Haruka and looked for some seconds at her half eaten roll. She was still very hungry but she knew that the other woman was hungry, too.

Guess she saves all her money for her little boy.

"Nineteen." Answered the young woman and lit yet a third cigarette. The smoke flew through the cold night and the dense rain fell down on them without mercy.

Nineteen.

Haruka swallowed hard and stroked some strands of blond hair out of her face.

Will I end like her when I am nineteen?

She knew that the woman before her earned in one night much more than she was able to earn in a week - even if she worked the whole day in a pizza palace or carried thousands of pamphlets. But Haruka knew that the price the young woman paid for the money was very high. Too high. Rude men didn't only destroy her body part by part. Night after night. They also destroyed her soul. Not many of them survived until they were thirty. And when they were older than thirty and couldn't find another job or had finished their education they were mostly lost. Because no one wanted an old woman when a nineteen year old girl stood just around the corner.

Haruka swallowed hard.

No one would ever wantsomeone like me...

"My little boy is eight months now." Declared the woman and threw away the third cigarettes. Quickly, she looked at the package but decided to keep the rest for later. "He's really cute and I love him a lot."

"Then I wish you and your son luck." Haruka took a deep breath and gave the young mother the half of her roll. She saw how dark eyes grew wide again and the young woman didn't know how to react. "Close your jacket, it's cold now. And go to your little boy. It's raining and you won't achieve anything by getting ill." Haruka smiled a sad smile and saw tears in dark eyes. "Take care of yourself."

With those words Haruka turned around and walked away. First slowly until she speeded up. Just two seconds later she ran. As if something evil hunted her. Or someone.

"Arigato..." whispered the young woman and stared thoughtfully at the roll in her hands. She had seen the same pain in dark green eyes and knew what it meant for the tall girl to share her food with a total stranger.

"I wish you luck, too. Guess we all need it."

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The rain got harder and colder with every minute. Steam formed before her mouth and Haruka shivered even more. She decided to left the dirty streets and to go instead over the normal streets around the outer parts. That would take her a longer to get to her room, but the lamp lights were switched on and suddenly she felt safer in their orange light.

Here lived normal people. Hard working people with small houses. Most of them had one or two children and lead the normal life. A happy life. Mostly. Some cars stood in the drives and suddenly Haruka wished that she could go into one of those houses. That she could call such a house her own. It didn't need be as big and luxurious as Michiru's uncle's house. But those houses looked comfortable and cute. Here and there she saw a sign on the fences that showed big and small dogs.

Hercules...

"Ran-chan!" A girl with long blond hair ran through the garden. Her white night dress was quickly wet, but she didn't care about it. She only saw the small puppy jumping with a high whimper into her arms. At that moment the door was pushed open and a concerned looking woman appeared in its the frame.

"Mina-chan. Come in, it's raining."

"But mommy, he's surely frightening of all that rain."

"But Mina-chan..." the woman sighed, but the smile on her face was tender. "Okay, then bring your doggy in, too."

The girl with the long blond hair cheered, then she grabbed the doggy tighter and ten seconds later she had already disappeared into the house. Haruka could see how the mother embraced her daughter tenderly before the door closed behind them.

I wish my mother had been so concerned about me...

Haruka sighed deeply and lowered her head. Then she carried on on her way. Her shoulder started again to hurt and she took a deep breath. Slowly, the houses passed by and soon she walked along the huge walls of the cemetery. Each part of Tokyo had its own cemetery, because many people lived in Tokyo. And many people died each year.

The tall girl tried to creep deeper in her pullover, but the cloth was wet and cold, too. She wasn't afraid of ghosts and zombies from the movies. She knew that they wouldn't leave the graves and try to attack her. Why should they? No one of the living wanted her. Why should the dead want her?

They would all faint to see me as a vampire.

Haruka grinned at that thought and remembered all the silly thrillers she had once watched at the cinema. She remembered too well how loud Yakoto had always screamed when another hand crept out of a fresh grave.

"Please, can anyone open the door?"

Haruka froze in motion as she heard the so well known voice. It sounded like a sob. A desperate sob. Someone pulled hard on the iron gate that was always closed at night. It could be dangerous to be on the cemetery in the dark. Not because of monsters, but because of the gravestones. You could easily run against one and some of them were so old that there was the danger that they simply overturned and then there was no one to help the victims buried beneath them.

The tall girl raised her head from her wet shoes and gasped for breath as she saw the person standing next to the iron portal. She only wore a light blue night dress. It was wet all over, just like sea green hair. Naked feet stood in deep puddles and the legs were dirty. The face was almost white while deep blue eyes watched the darkness behind the iron gate in despair. Two hands had grabbed solid bars and tried to pull them apart - in vain.

"Michiru?" asked Haruka shocked and the next moment she stood right besides the smaller girl. Her bag landed somewhere on the without her noticing it.

"They're in there. But they don't wanna let me in!" sobbed Michiru and pulled again harder at the bars.

"Who?" asked Haruka and saw how the sea beauty trembled.

She must be very cold.

Haruka frowned.

Did she walk all the way from her house to this cemetery? Why?

But the tall girl knew the answer by Michiru's next, very silent spoken words.

"My parents."

Michiru pulled again on the bars and shook the whole portal. But the lock was stable. She couldn't open it.

"My parents are there..." sobbed the smaller pupil and lowered her head. Wet strands of sea green hair fell over her shoulders and her body trembled even more.

"Michi..." Haruka sighed deeply and embraced her from behind. To hold her tight. To hinder her from running suddenly away. "They aren't here, Michi. They aren't even buried here." Haruka knew little about her best friend's parents, but she knew that they had been too famous to be buried at such a small cemetery. Surely, they had a big grave on a cemetery where a lot of famous people rested in peace.

"They are. They must be!" cried Michiru and grabbed the iron bars even harder. Her hands were white and as Haruka touched them she felt how icy they were.

"No, Michi. They aren't here." Whispered Haruka and tried with soft violence to get her away from the gate. But Michiru held the bars desperately tight and her whole body trembled.

"Let's go home, Michi. You're freezing like hell and I don't want you to get ill." Said Haruka and carefully remove one of Michiru's hands from the iron that was even colder than the rain that poured down on them. It didn't look as if it would stop raining within the next hour.

"Home? I have no home any more." Sobbed the smaller girl and shook her head. Suddenly, her hand grabbed Haruka's as if it were her only lifeline. With her right foot she kicked against the iron. It seemed to be too solid for her naked feet, but Michiru didn't even notice the cold metal. She simply kicked the closed gate until Haruka pulled her away from it - and closer to herself.

Hell, she's so cold!

"You have one, Michi. With your uncle and Hime-chan. Surely, they're concerned about you."

"No, they aren't. No one ever cared about my feelings. Not even my parents when they left me." Sobbed Michiru and tried again to get to the gate, but Haruka held her determinedly tight.

No on ever understood my feelings!

"Hime-chan loves you, you know that. She would be very sad to see you ill." Whispered Haruka and tried to warm Michiru. But it was senseless. She was almost as cold as the smaller girl. Her clothes were as wet as hers. "Your parents didn't want to left you. It was an accident."

"No, it wasn't!" Michiru's scream shouted through the night like thunder after lightening. "It was suicide!"

It was a cowardly reaction of two stupid people. Of two really frightened parents.

"Nani?" Haruka frowned and held the smaller girl tighter as Michiru reeled slightly. Of course she had heard all the news, too. Her classmates talked a lot about this topic - especially after Michiru had joined their lessons. She had seen all the articles in the newspapers. About the tragic accident. That the street had been too slippery and the road too bending. That the brakes hadn't worked properly and that the famous piano player and his wife hadn't had a chance to control it any longer.

"My father had cancer." Sobbed Michiru and held Haruka's hand tighter. It hurt, but the tall girl didn't say a word "He had only one year to live - at the most. My mother and he got to know the results on that day when the accident happened. He did a therapy before but it didn't work." Michiru lowered her head and hot tears ran over cold cheeks. "So they decided to die together. The brakes worked, but they didn't use them. They simply drove over the cliff and died..." Michiru's voice was nothing more than a high whimper. "All evening I waited impatiently at home for them. But they didn't return. The only one who rang the bell was a police man. A bloody police man who held his cap in his hands and looked so guilty and sad up to me..." Michiru shook her head and Haruka held her tighter. "They simply left and didn't say goodbye. Each night in my nightmares I try to reach them. I run after them and try to say goodbye. To tell them how much I love them for one last time. But they simply won't stop. They only speed up until they crash down with their car. And all I can do is to stand on the cliff and to look down on... on the burning wrack knowing... knowing that I am... am all alone... alone now..." sobbed Michiru and cried even more.

Haruka swallowed hard. She knew that she was the first one whom Michiru told the whole story. The truth about her parent's death. And she suspected that she'd be the only one.

"Hush, Michi..." whispered the tall girl and rocked her gently. Michiru got heavier in her hurting arms and so they went on their knees. They knelt in a puddle, but it didn't matter any longer. They were already wet all over.

"You aren't alone. You've got me." Haruka's voice was nothing more than a shaky whisper.

If you want me.

At that moment Michiru raised her head and deep blue eyes looked desperately into shimmering dark green ones.

Does she really mean it?

Again Michiru saw the picture of a laughing fourteen year old girl. Heard again Mila's warning words and Yakoto's sad ones in her mind. But they all were washed away by another wave of sorrow and pain. More tears ran over pale cheeks and Michiru pressed herself against the warm body next to her and cried openly. Her loud sobs filled the silent night. There was no one who saw them kneeling in front of the cemetery's entry. Only the rain was there. Falling down without mercy. Cold and hard. Like tiny stones.

"Let's take you back to your uncle's house, Michi." Said Haruka after a long time when the small girl started to trembled more and more in her hurting arms.

"But..."

"We'll visit your parents' grave later. When it's day and when it doesn't rain. Then you can say goodbye."

Michiru leaned her head against Haruka's shoulder and closed her suddenly tired eyes.

"We?" she asked with such a hopeless voice that made almost Haruka's heart break.

"Hai, we will go there. I promise." Haruka raised her head and stroked over wet sea green hair. She hardly made any promises, because she held them - with all consequences.

Then she stripped her pullover and pulled it over Michiru's head. It was wet, too, but the small girl trembled so much that Haruka simply wanted to give her anything to dress over her night dress.

"But you're..."

"Oh, don't worry, I'll survive. My uniform is warmer than your nightie." Haruka helped Michiru up and a shocked expression appeared on a pale face as the smaller girl looked down on her naked feet. As if she would realized just now where she was. And how.

"I am very stupid..." whispered Michiru and winced as Haruka carefully embraced her to make sure that she wouldn't fall until they were home. It was still a long way and the tall girl hoped that they would get to the huge house quite quickly. She only wanted to put Michiru in a warm tub and in a dry bed afterwards.

Quickly, dark green eyes looked into teary blue ones. Haruka was reminded of all the time she had spent in fear, was reminded of all the nights she woke up, screaming in silence. Again, she saw all those cruel nightmares that were haunting her down too often.

"No, Michi-chan, you aren't stupid." She whispered and held her tighter as the smaller girl started to reel. "You're simply hurt."

Deep blue eyes grew wide.

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It was dark in the huge house. No one seemed to miss her. No one seemed to notice that she simply ran out of the door into the dark night. Into the dense rain until her feet wouldn't carry her any longer.

"There's always a key under the doormat." Whispered Michiru and Haruka helped her upstairs to her room some seconds later. She switched on the lights and let Michiru sit down on a huge bed that was big enough for an entire family to sleep in.

They're really rich.

Haruka swallowed hard as she entered the bathroom and turned on the shower to heat up the water. She had asked Michiru before they returned if she wanted to take a bath or a shower. The smaller girl decided for a shower.

Quickly, Haruka searched for towels and put them on a chair next to the cabin.

They're really rich. This is only Michiru's private bathroom and she has a tub that's more a swimming pool than a tub. And she has two washbasins and one shower.

Haruka sighed slightly and walked again over to the bedroom.

She has a better bathroom than we have on the entire storey. For about 20 people...

"Do you want anything else?" asked Haruka and watched how Michiru rose from the bed. She was holding a dry night dress in her arms and a blue bathrobe. Quickly, the smaller girl raised her head and observed her best friend. The tall girl was as wet as she was. Small puddles formed under the wet shoes and blond strands pasted on in a pale face.

I can't let her go home like that.

"Do you want something warm to drink?" asked Haruka and suddenly clenched her fists.

I can't leave her like that.

"Hai. A warm tea would be nice. The kitchen is downstairs the first door to the right." Whispered Michiru before she finally went into the bathroom and closed the door silently behind her. Haruka took a deep breath, but then she explored the huge house until she found the kitchen. Ten minutes and two broken cups later Haruka returned to Michiru's room. The cups still steamed in her hands as she put them carefully down on the table next to the huge bed. There were paintings on the walls. One showed an endless ocean. Only one dolphin swam in the deep water. Or another picture showed a setting sun behind white clouds. Haruka could almost feel the wind blowing through the wide sky.

Did she draw them? She's very talented.

There was an easel standing next to the huge window. A white cloth covered it. Haruka was very curious to see what the sea beauty had drawn, but she knew that she wasn't allowed to look at it.

You're a guest. Don't forget that!

The door opened and Michiru came over. She now wore another night dress. It was black and showed her female outlines. Her hair was now dry again and she had put them together in her neck. Some strands fell over her shoulders and her cheeks were now redden.

She looks so beautiful.

Haruka swallowed hard and felt suddenly very out of place in this fine room. The carpet was soft and white. Her shoes were wet and dirty. She left puddles wherever she went. And her uniform...

"Do you also want to take a shower? You must be cold, too." Whispered Michiru and took the cup in her hands. A thin smile appeared on her face. "Arigato for the tea." She drank some gulps and sat down at the table. Haruka hesitated, then she shrugged her shoulders.

After all, she invited me to take a shower. With warm water.

The tall girl shivered and sighed deeply. She didn't want to think that she had to get into her wet uniform again afterwards and that she had to go into the dense rain again to get to her small room.

"I broke two cups." Haruka blushed and went slowly over to the bathroom.

"Don't worry." Michiru put some sugar in her tea and leaned back in the chair. "We have enough cups." She smiled as the door was silently closed.

I have so much of this material stuff.

Michiru's smile broke as she looked into her dark tea. She sighed deeply.

But that what really matters is missing...

The warm water fell on her still trembling body, but slowly she relaxed. Hot steam filled the cabin and she closed her eyes. She held the shampoo in her hands and smiled as she smelled the familiar scent.

It's so wonderfully warm.

Haruka sighed deeply and leaned against the tiles to enjoy the water running down her back.

I wish I could stay here forever.

But she knew she couldn't. She would get into her wet uniform again, drink her warm tea and go to her small room at the other end of the city. To get up early the next day to ask for the job in the fast food restaurant.

As long as I don't have to cook.

But she could sell the food. And certainly she could wash the dishes. Or clean the floor and the tables.

"Ruka?"

She winced in surprise as the cabin door was slowly opened. Michiru stood there. Again tears were running down her pale cheeks.

"Nani?" Haruka crossed her arms before her chest with a clumsy motion and the shampoo bottle fell on the ground. But she didn't dare to move to pick it up.

"Here's a warm towel and pyjamas. They belong to my uncle and maybe they're a little bit too long, but they're better than my night dresses." Michiru blushed slightly and lowered her head after she had stared for several moments at Haruka's naked body. At wet hair pasting in a deeply blushed face. Into askingly looking green eyes. At well formed breasts that were bigger than Michiru had imagined under the cut shirt. At a slim body. A very slim body. Probably Haruka didn't eat enough. Or did she do too much sport?

There was a bandage around Haruka's right shoulder but Michiru didn't notice. All she stared at were dark green eyes that shone so mysteriously.

Why does she hide her body behind that narrow uniform and that old pullover? It's beautiful.

Michiru stared now at her naked feet on the white carpet beneath that covered all of her rooms - even her bathroom.

She's beautiful...

"I don't know if... if you have anything to do tomorrow and maybe... maybe you want to go home... home now..." sobbed the sea green haired girl quietly and the towel escaped her trembling hands. It landed somewhere on the wet ground of the shower, but still Haruka didn't dare to move.

What home?

"I am still... still afraid of those bloody night... nightmares and I don't want to concern my uncle nor... Himme-chan." Michiru swallowed hard and suddenly her whole body trembled again. Like it had done in front of the cemetery. "Would... would you please stay tonight?" The last sentence was nothing more than a whisper but Haruka understood it too well.

Nani?

"You're my only... my only real friend I can trust... trust completely and I..." Michiru shook her head and went on her knees in front of the cabin. She covered her burning face with her icy hands and started desperately to sob.

A friend...

Haruka swallowed hard. Then she bowed and picked up the towel. She wrapped it around her suddenly freezing body and stepped out of the shower. Slowly, she went down next to Michiru, always caring that she didn't lose the towel she was wearing.

Only a friend...

"Don't worry." She whispered and stroked thoughtfully through sea green hair. "If you want me to stay, I'll stay."

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The bed was so wonderfully soft. So soft she had never experienced before. The blanket was thick and for the first time she could remember this autumn she didn't freeze. The sun was shinning through her window but she didn't want to open her eyes to let the nice dream go she just had. A nice dream about a beautiful girl who had called her her best friend. Who had searched for comfort and had given her so much more in return. Who made her a bento each day. Who helped her to learn English vocabulary and complicated math formulas. Who invited her into restaurants when she was hungry. Who made her break her record time at the swimming pool. Who made her laugh so many times. Who looked at her with eyes full of friendship and trust. Who simply was there every time this bloody life was going to be more than she could stand.

Please, God, don't let me wake up again.

Haruka sighed slightly and stretched her arms. She knew that this nice dream wouldn't last. Not for her. No one ever wanted her - so why should that beauty ever want her?

The tall girl winced as she felt how two warm arms wrapped around her waist and someone held her tenderly tight. A warm body was pressed against hers and she heard how someone mumbled some not definable words. They sounded like "Just five more minutes, mommy."

Haruka opened her eyes a bit and stared in disbelieve at Michiru who slept deep and tight. A smile was on her face and some sea green strands fell in her face. Haruka couldn't resist and raised one hand to stroke them carefully away.

She should smile more often.

But Haruka knew that it was hard to smile when you faced hell. Or even worse.

Her parents committed suicide...

The tall girl swallowed hard as she remembered how Michiru started again to cry. How she had hold her tightly for a long time and after the sea green beauty calmed down they sat on the bed and talked about it. Michiru told her the whole truth about her father's illness, about the accident and about her nightmares. How hard everything had been since that evening.

She wanted to jump...

Haruka swallowed hard as she remembered how Michiru told her with that sad look in her eyes that she hadn't wanted to live anymore. That she wanted to jump off that bridge that very night they met for the first time. That it was Haruka who held her back. First with her bag and later on with her warm embrace and with her comforting words.

The tall girl had been shocked when she heard those words and told her not to do such a silly thing again. Michiru only laughed sadly, but her laughter died away when Haruka told her that she couldn't leave her best friend just like that. After those words she nodded seriously.

"Don't leave me..." whispered Haruka silently. She knew that Michiru couldn't hear her. And she knew that Michiru wouldn't stay forever with her. One day she would overcome her pain, meet a nice boy who understood her music, was good at school and could give her a great future. But until that day - and even if it were tomorrow - Haruka wanted to be her best friend. Just for this short time. To dream of a better life she would never be able to live.

Before Haruka's thoughts could spin around any faster the door was pushed open and just two seconds later a small girl jumped into the bed. Her shoulder long black hair was messed and her pyjamas crumbled. A big smile was on her face as she embraced Haruka and now the tall girl had one girl at each side.

"Morning, Ruka." Yawned Hotaru and crept deeper to the warm body next to her and her smile grew wider as she felt how the tall girl covered her small body with a soft blanket.

"I wish it would always be such a nice Saturday morning." Whispered the small girl and giggled happily. "I've had such a nice dream, Ruka. That you would live here, too, and that you would play with me all day. With my cards and with my puppy."

"Puppy?" asked Haruka and smiled as she imagined herself to sit on the carpet with the little girl and to play cards - and of course to let Hotaru win.

"I am annoying my daddy to buy me one." Yawned Hotaru and settled slowly deeper into sleep again. "Love you, Ruka." She whispered and her tiny hand grabbed for a taller one and held it weakly tight.

Haruka swallowed hard.

Wish you were my family.

Carefully, she squeezed the two girls in her arms for some seconds.

Wish this were my home.

Haruka closed her eyes and sighed slightly.

I love you, too.

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"Daddy made breakfast!" Hotaru speeded through the kitchen and looked firstly on the set table, then into the microwave oven to find her warm milk, and into the oven to see the baked rolls. "But he's not here." Suddenly, she looked disappointed, but smiled and jumped into Haruka's arms. It had been past noon before they finally stood up and still they were wearing their night clothes under their bathrobes.

"He's at work." Read Michiru and sat down. Haruka followed her, but it was a little bit harder for her to sit down with the small girl grabbing her sleeves excitedly.

"Do you want milk or orange juice?" asked Hotaru and reached over the table to get the bottles. Michiru frowned, but then she smiled helplessly. She simply couldn't be angry with the little girl.

When did I have my last proper breakfast?

"Orange juice." Answered Haruka and swallowed. She blushed slightly as her stomach started to rumble and the next moment she held a roll in her hand. Hotaru had made it and soon Haruka's hand was full with honey. But that didn't matter. It tasted delicious and the tall girl was sure that it was the best roll she had ever tasted in her entire life.

"Auntie Michi promised me to help me draw a cute picture. Do you wanna help me, too?" Big dark eyes looked innocently pleading up to her.

"You don't have to..." said Michiru as she saw the concern in Haruka's face and stood up to get herself a coffee. She was still extremely tired and felt exhausted. Normally, she didn't drink coffee. But normally she didn't cry all night.

I've told her everything in my pain. Was it right?

Michiru took the coffee and turned around to see how Haruka fed Hime-chan with orange slices she had just peeled.

"Of course I want to see your great pictures." Whispered the tall girl and smiled lovingly down at the little girl on her lap. Hotaru clapped excitedly in her hands and opened her mouth to get another orange slice.

Strange. Normally, they're too sour and...

Michiru grinned as she saw that Haruka dipped them into the honey before the slices went right into a wide opened mouth.

At that moment the sea green haired girl knew that it had been the right decision.

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"Ruka?"

It was already dusk and Haruka decided to go. Some of the shops she wanted to go to this weekend had just opened and she hoped to get a job. And she wasn't sure what to do if it got any later.

This night I won't have a reason to sleep next to her...

Haruka turned around as she heard her best friend's voice. Now the uniform she wore was clean and her shoes were dry and warm again.

"Hai?"

Hotaru was already in bed. The day had been exciting with drawing pictures and playing hide and seek. Of course the little girl won. After they shared a huge pizza Hotaru fell asleep on Haruka's lap and so they decided to take her to her small bed. Still Dr. Tomoe wasn't home yet.

"This is for you." Michiru blushed slightly and before Haruka could react she felt the warm cloth put over her old pullover.

"Nani?" Startled green eyes looked down at a warm jacket. A dark coloured leather jacket. It had soft lining in it and it seemed to have been made for her.

This must have been expensive!

"But..."

Michiru smiled and took suddenly icy hands carefully in her own to hold them carefully tight.

"You're always freezing and I can't see other people freeze." She giggled and squeezed those hands gently. "Don't make such a face as if I just declared to you that Hotaru would cook tomorrow."

Now Haruka had to smile, too. The little girl had been very busy to set the table in the evening and almost let their pizza fall down when they wanted to put it into the oven.

"She's a lovely little devil." Whispered the tall girl.

"Hai she is." Replied the smaller one.

Both looked for a long time into each other's eyes. Then Michiru let go of Haruka and stroked softly though blonde strands to fix them. Hotaru did a good job to mess them up.

"Arigato." Haruka turned around and opened the door to leave the house. To go to some restaurants and ask for a job. And then to go to her small room to lay down on her cold, empty bed. To remember a fantastic day.

Haruka froze in motion and turned around to look into teary blue eyes as she heard the soft voice behind her.

"Friends don't need to say arigato."

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