-1Note: I changed quite a bit in the first two chapters because someone wrote that there wasn't enough motivation for Vernon to abuse Harry. Another thing I did was to take out the girls in chapter two and just use one new character. I originally thought I would use those characters in other parts of the story but changed my mind. So if you get a chance read it and let me know what you think. 1/11/06
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The infirmary was quiet and Madame Pomfrey still had not come back from her lunch. Snape had decided he would skip class to sit with Harry and make sure the boy got the rest he needed to insure the antidote worked properly. Snape thought about the antidote once again and the note from Vespa.
He couldn't believe that his Aunt took him for such a spineless fool. Did she honestly think he would just let her run his life and not retaliate? Snape thought back to the so called "commands" she had issued. The first one telling him not to adopt Harry was absolutely absurd. There wasn't anything or anyone who could stand in the way of the adoption. The second was beyond his realm of futility. Did Vespa honestly think that he would stand by and let Sir Stanton tell him what to do? Hah, that would be the day! There wasn't a wizard or witch alive who could make him do anything he didn't want to do.
The real problem was that Harry had to have that antidote every three days to neutralize the poison in his system. Snape had never seen a poison like that in all his years as a Potion Master. He remembered talk within the family about Vespa's greatness at being a Potion Master in her younger days. He thought she had given it up but now knew she had been working on more sinister potions. He knew that whatever poison she had given Harry would be something of her own making. Duplicating the antidote would take time but he hoped he could eventually do it. The biggest problem was how he was going to get the poison out of Harry's system so the boy wouldn't have to keep taking the antidote the rest of his life? Snape felt horrible for putting the boy in the middle of this family feud, however unintentional it was.
Snape thought about Harry and how emotional he had been earlier. Was the boy just suffering from the side effects of the poison or had he really been angry? This teen anxiety is not my area of expertise.
Snape saw Harry startle awake and quickly took hold of his hand to let him know he was safe. Harry closed his eyes again and relaxed. Snape watched the boy and tried to remember what it was that had made Harry angry with him earlier. Snape thought maybe it had something to do with him saying that he was going to 'punish' Harry if the boy got out of his bed again. No, that could not be it, surely Harry knows I will have rules to abide by.
Snape looked at Harry and saw he was awake now and staring off with a thoughtful expression.
"How does your stomach feel Harry?"
"Okay, better then yesterday. Professor?"
"Yes?"
"I really am sorry about how I acted earlier."
"Harry why did it upset you so much when I said I was going to punish you?" Snape asked with the hope of opening the off limits subject.
Harry didn't say anything but just shook his head.
"You do know that you will get punished for not abiding by the rules I set forth, do you not?"
Harry looked towards the Professor with a distressed expression and said, "Yes sir."
"But you also know that I will never hurt you physically or take meals away or make you sleep in a cupboard, right?" Snape wanted to make sure Harry understood he would no longer be subjected to abuse.
Harry closed his eyes and said, "Yeah, I know Professor. It's just hard… you know, to forget."
Snape thought that sounded reasonable after all the boy had been through. Maybe he should push the topic a little more and get Harry to open up about the Dursley's.
"What did you imagine I was going to do to you when I said I would punish you?"
"I don't really want to talk about it okay?" Harry's scratchy voice said with sadness.
"You shouldn't pretend like it never happened though. Perhaps you could enlighten me on how you came to get that cut on your back?" Snape knew he was pushing the boy but needed to hear Harry say it.
"I can't remember," Harry said and let go of the Professor's hand.
Snape's heart skipped a beat as he hoped that Harry was lying about not remembering. Snape knew that if Harry truly couldn't remember, then the boy had bigger emotional scars than anyone knew.
"Harry you do not need to conceal it from me. I saw everything. I saw every bruise and broken bone and that dreadful cut on your back," Snape persisted.
Harry sunk further into the blankets and shook his head as if in denial. "I'm tired, kay?"
Snape wasn't about to let the boy off the hook that easily. "You'll sleep much better if you stop pushing down all the memories and begin to talk with me. It isn't healthy to pretend like nothing ever happened Harry."
Harry scrunched his eyes as a sudden memory flashed in his head. Boy you're going to pay for all the bad things you do! Please Uncle Vernon please, I'm trying so hard to change!
Snape watched as Harry broke out in a cold sweat and pulled the covers tighter around himself.
"Harry talk to me. Tell me." Snape implored as he reached for Harry's hand again and rubbed the back of it with his thumb.
Harry made himself push the memory back down and away. No, he wouldn't talk about it. He didn't want to have to relive the terrible things that happened. He shook his head and said, "Severus please, please don't make me say it. It didn't happen, nothing happened anyways."
Oh Merlin, Harry was suppressing the abuse! Snape was at a loss and didn't want to push the boy further than he could handle.
Snape put his other hand on Harry's face and said, "I will not persist but I will not let you deny what happened. It would not be beneficial to your well being. I will be with you every step of the way but it is a journey you must take."
"I'm tired, I'm really tired," Harry said in a panicked voice and moved away from Snape's touch, pushing the Professor's hand away from his face. He didn't want anyone touching him.
Snape knew he had pushed the boy too far and felt bad for that. If the boy wasn't ready to talk then maybe he shouldn't persist further. Snape placed a hand on Harry's face again and felt the boy tremor.
Snape said, "Harry it's okay. You're safe and we won't talk about this any further. Relax now and get some sleep." It was eerie how the boy seemed to just obey and stop shaking. He watched as Harry soon fell into a deep sleep.
Oh Merlin, this was going to be a hard task. The boy was too frightened to even think about what happened. Truth be told, Snape was frightened to hear it.
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Harry was in a deep sleep when Voldemort suddenly invaded his dreams. Harry watched in horror as Hermione and Ginny walked into Honeydukes candy store and a dark cloaked figure followed them in. Suddenly the figure grabbed Ginny as Hermione's back was turned. Ginny kicked and tried to scream but the dark figure covered her mouth and held her tight as he fled the store. Harry's scar burned with pain.
Harry woke up with a start and looked around for help. He needed to get someone to help him find Ginny and quick. Harry scrambled out of bed and was running towards the infirmary doors when they swung open and Ron and Neville walked in.
"Ron, I think a Death Eater has Ginny! Quick we have to get to Hogsmeade!" Harry said in a panic.
Ron looked totally confused and said, "Harry calm down, I just left Ginny by the lake and she wasn't going into Hogsmeade. What happened to make you think she was taken?"
"I-I had this … vision or something and it felt so real. I dunno I think it was Voldemort. Are you sure Ron, are you really sure Ginny is okay?" Harry pressed his fingers to the scar in hopes that would dull the pain a bit.
"I'm sure Harry. I just saw her and she was going to finish her homework with Hermione down by the lake."
"Ron I have to see her for myself. It was so real and maybe she changed her mind and went to Hogsmeade," Harry said with panic still in his voice.
"Harry you know Professor Snape wanted you to stay in bed. Why don't I go get Ginny and bring her back here?"
"No! I need to see right now. It already could be too late," Harry said as he grabbed his bathrobe off the bed and stepped into his slippers.
Harry led the way down the corridor and down to the main entrance. Several students stopped to stare at him and a few said hi but Harry ignored everyone and kept his quick pace up to find Ginny. As he reached the entrance, Ginny and Hermione walked through the doors.
"Harry your up! I thought you weren't supposed to get out of bed?" Hermione asked with a hint of sternness to her voice.
Harry was shocked but relieved to see his friends. It must have been another false vision, like the one with Sirius at the ministry! It just felt so real.
"I was just coming down to see you," Harry said and gave a quick look towards Ron. He hoped Ron would not mention the vision Harry just had. It was already embarrassing enough and the last thing he needed was for Snape to find out.
Just as he thought that, he felt a hand on his shoulder and a firm squeeze.
"Mr. Potter I am at a loss. What is it going to take to keep you in bed?" Snape said in a very controlled voice. Harry knew that voice to be the most dangerous one and things weren't looking so good for him right now.
Harry turned around towards Snape and tried to come up with an excuse without revealing the vision. If Snape found out he was having false visions from Voldemort again, Harry knew the Professor would force him into occlumency lessons once again. That was the last thing Harry wanted. It was hard enough trying to forget all the things Vernon did to him without having Snape sift through his memories and bring them back up.
"Erm, I-I just needed to get something from the kitchens to eat."
"Mr. Potter do you think me a fool?" Snape asked as he looked at the rest of the students and then back at Harry. What are they up to now?
Harry wasn't sure if he was supposed to answer that so he just looked down at his feet.
"I will bring you food, however you must get back to bed," Snape watched as the other Gryffindor said goodbye to Harry.
Snape followed Harry back up to the infirmary and said a spell. A bowl of hot soup appeared on the nightstand. Harry could smell the chicken soup and it turned his stomach. Suddenly he wished he had come up with a different lie to tell the Professor.
"Erm, Professor?"
"Yes."
"I'm not really hungry anymore," Harry said as a wave of nausea hit him.
"Well, that's too bad isn't it? If you were so hungry you had to ignore all my orders and roam the corridors with your friends to get food, then you are hungry enough to eat this," Snape said angrily and held a spoonful of soup to Harry's mouth.
Harry grabbed the spoon and the soup sloshed off onto his covers. He took another spoonful and began to begrudgingly eat. After the fourth spoonful his stomach rebelled and he vomited all over his covers. Snape looked disgusted as he waved his wand over the mess and it disappeared.
"Have we had enough of this farce? Why don't you tell me why you were really roaming the hallways?"
Harry shrugged his shoulders and looked out the window, embarrassed by the whole incident. He lay further down on the bed and looked up at the ceiling.
"Mr. Potter I have another class to attend to and I no longer trust that you are sensible enough to adhere to simple instructions. Therefore, I am going to put a spell on the covers to keep you from wandering." Snape said a few words and flicked his wand towards Harry.
Harry tried to push the covers off but they remained firmly in place.
"Severus you can't do this!" Harry tried to scream out but it came out in more of a strangled whisper. He fought against the covers but they became tighter.
Severus had no idea the panic the boy was feeling. Snape turned on his heel and strode out the door with robes billowing behind.
"Severus come back!" came Harry's panicked voice as the doors to the infirmary closed firmly.
Being forcefully held against the bed triggered something in Harry's mind. It was like the floodgates had been opened and all the memories of Vernon came at him in full force.
Harry fought against the covers as his mind raced back to Privet Dr. and the punishments Vernon inflicted on him.
A flash of memory:
being tied to the bed
the heavy belt,
the short silver knife
Harry lost all conscious thought of where he was and held still without crying out as he had been taught by Uncle Vernon.
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An hour later Madame Pomfrey came into the infirmary and checked on Harry. She saw him lying still and his eye's wide open.
"Mr. Potter, how are you feeling?" The nurse checked Harry's temperature and still the boy didn't answer.
"Mr. Potter, are you alright?" No answer came forth. "Mr. Potter I am not playing with you, now answer my question!" Nothing.
Madame Pomfrey ran out into the hall and grabbed the first student she saw.
"Go down to the dungeons and tell Professor Snape that he is needed immediately!"
Within a few minutes Snape ran through the infirmary doors. He shot a look towards Harry and saw that he was not moving. "What happened? Why isn't he moving?"
Madame Pomfrey told him how she had found Harry unresponsive.
Snape grabbed Harry's face and looked at his eyes. "Harry? Harry answer me!" The boy stared without seeing. He was in a catatonic state. "What happened? Who did this?" Snape asked fiercely.
"I don't know Severus, this is how I found him." Madame Pomfrey ran to the floo and called Dumbledore.
Severus checked to see if the magical spell he had placed on Harry's blankets had been broken. He waved his wand over the bed and found that the spell was still intact.
Dumbledore came into the room and went directly over to Harry. Harry was not moving and he looked into the boy's unseeing eyes. He held Harry's face in his hands and closed his own eyes while reciting a spell. He was reading Harry's mind and trying to find out what had put Harry into this state. Dumbledore was appaled at what he saw and his hands shook a little as he released Harry's face. He had his answer to Harry's catatonic state.
"Severus, I think you should use your legillimens on Mr. Potter. He seems to have fallen into a state of shock that would best be explained by you looking into his current thoughts," Dumbledore said with an angry edge to his voice. He was actually quite upset that Snape had forced the boy to stay in bed by magical means and wanted Severus to see the damage it had caused the boy.
Snape looked to the Head Master with confusion but pulled out his wand and stood next to Harry. He pointed his wand at Harry's head and said, "Legillimens!"
Snape was plunged into the pits of hell. He saw Harry being tied to a bed and Vernon Dursley coming towards him with a knife. He could feel Harry's fear and see the boy shake uncontrollably in his mind. He could feel Harry struggle with holding back his cries of pain. Suddenly the memory was pushed down into blackness and Harry's owl came into view. The owl sat silently and stared at the boy with fear. A flash of Dursley came racing back and a belt being swung. Back to blackness again. The owl staring back. The shiny knife and an angry Dursley flashed through the boy's thoughts again but were quickly pushed down and the owl reappeared.
He had the overwhelming feeling that Harry was trying to keep the owl safe and was pushing the abuse he suffered out of his memories to do it. Snape begun to make sense of the thoughts and memories Harry was going through.
Harry was protecting his owl by not admitting to being abused by Dursley. Dursley must be holding Harry's owl to keep the boy quiet. The despicable man was black mailing Harry with his beloved owl as hostage!
Snape tried to get Harry's attention while in his memories but the boy was so far gone that he didn't seem to comprehend. Finally Snape pushed himself out of Harry's memories and found himself on his knees next to Harry's bed.
Snape quickly stood up and faced Dumbledore. "I did this to him! I didn't know Dursley used to tie Harry to a bed and torture him! I didn't know Albus! I never would have kept Harry in his bed by force if I had known," Snape's voice broke and he felt miserable for causing Harry to withdraw completely and relive the hell he had been through.
Dumbledore stood watching the man before him berate himself and take the blame for Harry's current state.
"Professor, I know you didn't do this on purpose but we are dealing with a severely abused boy. You can not apply the same standards to him as you once were able to. Furthermore, it is not prudent to use physical means to make him abide by your rules," Dumbledore said as he watched the Professor compose himself once again.
"I know what I have to do Albus! I know how to make Harry come back to us. I need to go back to Privet Dr. and get his owl back!" Snape said with determination.
"Severus you have been banned from going back to Privet Dr.. If the ministry finds out they will put you in jail." Dumbledore said as he too tried to come up with a plan to get Harry's owl back.
"Albus I don't care where they send me as long as Harry comes out of this state of shock! I'm going back to Privet Dr.!" Snape said and stormed over to the fireplace. He threw floo powder into the fire. "Number four Privet Dr.!" Snape said and stepped into the floo.
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Vernon had been home everyday since he had been fired from his job. He had actually started missing his 'lessons' with the boy. They had helped him to release his pent up frustrations at the world and how unfair it was. Vernon thought it quite unjust that he had been so kind to an orphaned boy and taken him in, only to have been accused of abusing him. Hell, he had only been trying to teach him a few lessons. Vernon also thought it unfair that his own wife was starting to nag him about getting a job. Hadn't he worked harder than anyone and paid all the bills for years. Vernon felt he deserved a bit of a break. Vernon decided to go up to his room and take a well deserved nap.
Vernon entered his bedroom and froze. Sitting on his bed was an angry dark haired man with a long black cloak and a wand in his hand.
"You get out now! I-I'll call the police or Sir Stanton or whoever it is that puts your type in jail!" Vernon sputtered out with fright. Snape flicked his wand towards the large man and Vernon floated sideways over to the bed. He rose higher and higher until his stomach was touching the ceiling above the bed.
Vernon tried to scream but nothing came out. He tried to move his arms but he couldn't as they felt frozen to his sides. Snape flicked his wand again and Vernon crashed down to the bed with a terrible thud. Vernon watched in horror as the man in black ripped his shirt open, exposing his big stomach and sagging chest. Vernon was so frightened now that he actually urinated in his pants. He watched as the man slowly flicked his wand and a whip appeared hovering over Vernon's body. The black cloaked man raised a hand and let it fall down to his side. At that precise moment the whip began to beat upon Vernon's chest and stomach painfully. Vernon screamed silently and tried to plead with the man to make it stop. After several long minutes the whip stopped but the man pulled out a small silver knife.
Vernon shook his head violently from side to side trying to make the man understand something. The man approached him and placed the knife next to his rib cage. Suddenly the man pulled out his wand and placed it to the side of Vernon's head and said, "Legillimens," in a dark eerie voice. Vernon didn't understand what that meant but he felt a tickle in his brain and screamed silently for it to stop.
Snape probed Vernon's thoughts until he came to Hedwig and where he would find her now. Snape had intended to just scare Vernon with the knife but after probing his thoughts and memories Snape changed his mind. He had witnessed Vernon abusing Harry and now Vernon would pay dearly for hurting the boy. Snape was furious and felt as if he might need to kill Vernon.
The black cloaked man made his way to the bedroom door and slowly closed it and locked it and returned back to Vernon.
Ten minutes later Snape emerged from the room with a look of utter disgust. He walked into the hallway and slid open the passage to the attic. He reached up and pulled the ladder down. It only took a minute to locate the sickly white owl. With the greatest care possible Snape held the owl close to his body and spoke softly to calm the frightened pet. He spoke of Harry and Harry's great need for the pet especially at the present time. The owl seemed to calm at the sound of her master's name.
Snape flicked his wand and said a spell at the closed door that Vernon now resided behind. He went down to the first floor and threw a handful of floo powder into the fire. Snape emerged in Dumbledore's office and made his way down to the infirmary. He was feeling quite satisfied with the punishment he had inflicted on Dursley. It had felt good to exact his revenge on the man, even if he hadn't quite killed him.
When Snape walked through the infirmary doors he had no idea the emotional flood that would hit him at the sight of his future son. He had seen the torture the boy had endured, he had felt the fear and humilation the boy had went through and wondered how Harry could even be sound after that abuse. Snape's heart just broke at the sight of the catatonic boy and wanted to fix things for him and make them right.
Dumbledore placed a hand on Severus' shoulder and gave a slight squeeze then left them to some privacy.
Snape was alone with Harry and his heart felt heavy at seeing the boy look so lost. He sat down on the side of the bed and began to talk about Hedwig.
"Harry, I have someone here who needs you," Snape said as he placed the tired sick bird on Harry's stomach and placed one of the boy's hands on top of it.
"Harry your friend needs you more than ever. She needs to know that you are coming back to us."
Snape saw a small movement as Harry's finger moved by Hedwig.
"Yes son, Hedwig is back and you need not hide any longer. Your owl needs you now more than ever. Harry, I need you now. I can not imagine life without you in it son. I haven't even had the pleasure of taking you to Quiddich games or watching you ride that Wizard Board again. Its time to come back." Severus dropped his head in his hands and felt a deep sense of loss over seeing Harry like that. Just then he saw another flicker from Harry's hand.
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I hope that wasn't too hard to read.
Thanks for the reviews again. I am on my last week of cruises before I return home and can not wait to see my family again. There was this weird guy following me around all day today and I saw him again before coming down to send this off. He was taking pictures on deck and I saw him pointing the camera at me every time he thought I wasn't watching. I could see in the reflection in the window though. Then I went down to the staff bar and when I came out he was there again. I think I'll have to call security to check him out. Yuck! I hate it when weird things happen.
Okay after reading the reviews I thought I better tone the story down a little. I think I get carried away with the hurt/comfort thing. Anyway let me know if you think I should or not.
Take care and have a great day!