Chapter 6: A New Life

Naruto and Sasuke took heavy steps into their room and walked to their respective beds. Forgoing any semblance of pride, they collapsed face first onto their pillows. The boys were sweating from head to toe. Obito stepped into their peripheral vision and leaned on the doorframe with his arms crossed.

"Rough day?" he teased.

Their synchronized groans were muffled by the bed covers.

"Well," Obito said, "I count today as a success. We've made progress. Now all that's left is for you to keep honing your Sharingan's abilities, Sasuke."

Sasuke rolled onto his back and let out a breath. "What's next?"

"Don't worry about that. For now, just rest. You'll need your strength. Same to you, Naruto."

Naruto lifted a weak arm to give him a thumbs up, then flopped onto the bed again. Faint stabs of pain radiated from the numerous bandaged areas where the fox's chakra had burned hottest. Mr. Zetsu healed a lot of the damage by helping to boost his chakra, but the rest was up to time. He was too exhausted to be mad about Obito being so casual about the amount of danger that little test was going to put him in. Naruto had, in fact, been right all along. That is, assuming the devastation awaiting him when he awoke in the dojo was all due to The Nine Tails.

But I mean, I survived, so I guess that means I really cantrust him. Right?

Another twinge of pain made Naruto ignore his lingering thoughts and focus on lying still. If he stayed put, it hurt a lot less. He was so at peace that he didn't notice a thing when he slipped into the sweet embrace of dreamland.

Naruto hurried to greet Obito when he walked through the door. He was only gone for about an hour, but since this was the first night in their new home, it felt like longer. Sasuke followed behind Naruto with much less enthusiasm. Mr. Zetsu shut the door behind Obito and locked it, then stood by the wall.

"I'm home, you two," Obito said, removing his mask. "Did Zetsu take good care of you?"

"Yeah," Sasuke said with a casual shrug. "Guess so."

"He sure did!" Naruto beamed up at the weird-looking Akatsuki member. "Mr. Zetsu gave us a tour of the WHOOOOOOOOLE house. It was really cool getting to see everything."

Sasuke rolled his eyes. "The rooms are mostly empty. There's nothing cool about a house full of air and faded paint stains."

Naruto blew a raspberry. "Whatever. You just want something to complain about!"

"As if I have to look that hard."

Obito held out a hand before Naruto could open his mouth again. "It's okay, Naruto. Actually, he's right. We need furniture. Which brings me to my next task."

Naruto's eyes widened with curiosity. Even Sasuke broke his usual stone faced routine and raised a brow.

Clasping both hands together, Obito concentrated his chakra into a single point. The air became charged and heavy. Naruto noticed Sasuke taking a wide stance. He couldn't blame him; it felt as if at any second, a powerful attack would come their way. Instead, Obito splayed his arms and wood constructs came pouring out of his sleeves like liquid. The boys backed away, watching in awe as he molded a few chairs, a table, and a couch out of the wood jutsu and placed them around the room.

"These should do for now," he declared.

"How'd you do that?" Sasuke said. His Sharingan was already activated and trained on Obito's arms.

The older Uchiha laughed darkly, saying, "I'll explain another time, but to be brief…it's the same as The First Hokage's fabled Wood Style jutsu." He turned toward his fellow Akatsuki member. "Zetsu, if you please?"

The two-toned individual reached for the door handle and let someone else in. While he did, Obito continued to speak.

"I've brought someone to make sure you're okay. That way, even when I can't be here, he'll be able to keep you safe."

Naruto tilted his head to one side. "I thought Mr. Zetsu was going to-"

Both boys gasped when a humanoid creature with white skin and yellow eyes stepped through the door. He was the spitting image of the white half of Mr. Zetsu. Well, other than being all white instead of half. Even weirder, he was naked, but had nothing between his legs.

"I am," the original Mr. Zetsu said. "This is one of my clones. He's going to live here and watch over you two at all times. We are linked, so if you need anything, he can relay information back to Obito through me."

Sasuke looked from one Zetsu to the other. "But you don't have unlimited chakra, do you? Even Shadow Clones can't exist forever."

The white half of the real Zetsu laughed. "He's a different kind of clone. I don't need to use chakra for him to maintain his form. You don't have to worry about the clone ever disappearing."

Unconvinced, Sasuke launched a kunai at the newly formed replica. Fake Zetsu raised a hand, taking the blow on his palm. Then he plucked the ninja tool loose with a casual hum. His skin reformed around the wound in under a second.

"Whoa!" Naruto said, gaping in awe. "So he's like, a real clone instead of a Shadow Clone?!"

"And he regenerates instantly?" Sasuke added. "How?"

"Look," Obito said, "you can save all of your questions for this Zetsu." He indicated the clone. "As for us, we'll be off."

"Whaaaaaat?" Naruto bemoaned. "But you just got here!"

Obito froze, half from amusement at the kid's sudden attachment to him. However, he felt something else he couldn't quite explain. He smirked and headed for the door with Zetsu in tow.

"Don't worry," said the Zetsu clone. "I'll take care of you both. Watch this."

The clone changed shape right before their eyes. In mere moments, he had transformed into a human man in a standard Leaf Village flak jacket. His Leaf-insignia headband was wrapped bandana style around his head.

"Whoa!" Naruto said.

Stopping in the open doorway, Obito turned back. "Zetsu will pose as a Hidden Leaf shinobi who is undercover on a top secret mission. So for the foreseeable future, if anyone asks, he is your legal guardian. You'll be free to roam the surrounding area and make a life here without worry, so long as you adopt disguises. Zetsu, make sure you go into town to get some clothes, supplies, and whatever else they need."

The man gave him an eerie smile and nodded. A portal formed outside and the real Zetsu stepped through, waving goodbye as he went.

Naruto and Sasuke shared an uneasy glance. They may not have liked each other very much, but they saw eye to eye at the moment. This was quickly turning into a much bigger lifestyle change than they bargained for. How much more hadn't their new guardian told them about this living arrangement?

"W-wait," Naruto said. He ran to Obito and looked up at him with a pout. "You promise you'll be back soon, right? We're going to be a family, aren't we?"

"Of course," Obito said, crouching to look Naruto in the eyes. "The work I'm doing for the Akatsuki is very important, but I haven't forgotten my promise to the two of you." He looked over Naruto's shoulder at Sasuke. "I'm going to spend the rest of our days here teaching you two as much as I can about your unique abilities."

"Unique abilities?" Naruto said.

"Yes. Sasuke has his Sharingan. Plus I'll teach him a few special Uchiha Clan jutsu. You, on the other hand, have this."

Obito slipped a scroll out from beneath his cloak. "I was planning to show it to you later, but I guess there's no harm in taking a peek now."

This gesture of trust settled Naruto's nerves. He smiled and held the scroll tight. "Thanks."

Nodding, Obito threw a furtive glance back toward the portal. "I've got to go. I'll see you both in a few."

Just like that, he was gone and the portal vanished. The cloned Zetsu reverted to his original form.

"So," he almost sang, "what shall we do first?"

Sasuke crossed his arms, saying nothing. Naruto looked back at him and shrugged. Without saying a word, the latter could tell this wasn't how either of them expected their new lives to end up. Staring at the inhuman clone addressing them, Naruto wondered if he had made a terrible mistake coming here.

Zetsu was sitting casually on a giant cube when Obito landed beside him, mask donned. They glanced at something laying flat on the surface of an adjacent cube and locked eyes.

"Well?" Obito said. "How much trouble did that one give you?"

Standing up, White Zetsu chuckled. Black Zetsu took it upon himself to respond. "None at all. The Leaf have no idea that his status was ever compromised."

"Good."

A calm, quiet atmosphere set in. Obito broke the silence first.

"What is it, Zetsu? You seem distracted."

White Zetsu took over. He was still laughing as he spoke. "Oh, it's nothing. I had just forgotten, after all this time, how hard it is to clean up blood. Good thing they thought those red spots were just paint stains. Hahaha!"

"I see." Obito leapt to the neighboring cube and examined the fresh corpse at his feet. Studying the slain undercover ninja's features left him stunned. Even he had to admit that it was hard not to be amazed by the accuracy of Zetsu's transformations. If not for the victim's vacant eyes and colorless skin, it would be impossible to distinguish him from his doppelganger living with Naruto and Sasuke. "I'll dispose of the body."

Naruto Uzumaki smiled to himself, puffing out his chest. The dojo had taken Obito and the Zetsu clone no time at all to fix up. In just a week, the damage caused by The Nine Tails was repaired. Scratches and cracks in the wall and floor were mended so well that the place looked almost brand new. Obito paused to express disbelief when he saw Naruto and Sasuke waiting outside the dojo and ready to go earlier than him. This was the polar opposite of their characteristic dread. Even the power-hungry Sasuke had grown weary of their adoptive father's merciless training regimen.

Of course we did, Naruto had said to himself. It's about time, sheesh! Anything's better than those lame chakra control drills.

Working hard to the point of exhaustion was even less appealing than usual if it happened over the course of hours. Long, torturous hours spent sitting still. Compared to that, today's ninjutsu training was a godsend. Today was going well. Less than an hour in, he was already seeing results. He didn't need the scroll anymore, because he had this jutsu pretty much figured out. All he needed to do now was to 'refine his technique,' according to Obito.

"I almost had it," the blond panted. He put his hands on his knees and took a breather. Sweat dripped from his forehead.

"You're even more skilled at this than I would have predicted, Naruto," Obito said, moving away from the wall to approach him. "At this rate, you may be able to erect barriers stronger than the one around this place."

Naruto glanced at Obito out of the corner of his eye. "Why are you wearing that mask again? It's not like you have to hide around us."

"Oh." The man chuckled. "Old habits die hard, I guess." He took the mask off and examined the singular hole over his right eye.

A flash of light from outside drew Naruto's attention. Just what was Sasuke up to out there?

"He's progressing well," said a voice. "Sasuke's Fire Style is becoming quite formidable."

Naruto looked down and found White Zetsu was partly submerged in the floor between his feet. His half-disfigured face smiled up at Naruto, sending a shiver down the boy's spine. Crying out in surprise, Naruto stumbled backward, kicking Zetsu in the face in the process.

"Ow! What was that for?" said Obito's henchman. His head was frozen in a tilted back position.

Realizing what he'd just done, Naruto gasped. "Oops! Sorry, Mr. Zetsu! Are you okay?"

Zetsu grumbled and shook off the pain. Obito answered in his stead.

"It would take far more than that to harm Zetsu, Naruto."

"Oh," Naruto said, "good." He flinched, looking closer at the half-submerged visitor. "Wait, you're not…"

The Uzumaki turned to check for Zetsu's clone and found it was still watching from afar. He returned his gaze to the disembodied head.

"Yes," Zetsu said with a nod. "I'm the real one."

"Do you have news for me?" Obito cut in, his brow raised.

"Yes. I've come to let you know about an exciting development within the Akatsuki!"

"Exciting?" Naruto echoed. He crouched closer to Zetsu and leaned in, buzzing with newfound energy. "What is it?"

"Let's talk in private," Obito said. He summoned a portal and stepped forward.

"Wait!" Naruto tugged at his sleeve. "Can't Sasuke and I join you? We're a lot stronger now, so you should let us help out."

"Thanks for your enthusiasm, but it's still too soon. Keep working on this jutsu. I'll be back shortly to assess you and Sasuke's progress."

They were gone before Naruto could protest. He adopted a slumped posture. Just like back home, once again he was being left out. Instead of allowing himself to sulk, though, he slapped his face to refocus. Then Naruto stood tall and gathered chakra. When he was sure he had gathered enough for the jutsu, he slid into a wide stance and called forth the special ability depicted in Obito's scroll.

Several long, golden chains shot out of his stomach toward a Wood Style training dummy, shattering it into pieces alongside several others that had met the same fate. The chakra that formed the chains was so refined, they gave off a mesmerizing glow. Just as soon as they appeared, however, the chains dissolved into thin air.

Naruto's budding smile fizzled out. "Damn it! I can't maintain it."

"You'll get it eventually, Naruto," came the Zetsu clone's voice.

The clone was staring at him, unblinking, from across the room. He was doing the same strange smile as always. Fake Zetsu held up a hand to mimic the social gesture Naruto taught him. The boy couldn't help but cringe — not to mention feel guilty for his poor decision-making.

SO creepy! Maybe I was wrong to try and teach the clone to do a thumbs up. I can't believe I'm saying this, but I almost prefer the old Mr. Zetsu.

Naruto blinked back to attention and found the clone was still holding the same awkward pose. As if that weren't already enough, he went a step further by attempting a very stilted wink. A shudder of discomfort powerful enough to shake the walls of the dojo ran through Naruto.

What have I done?

Naruto was eager to get out of the house and explore by the end of the week. Fake Zetsu agreed, on the condition that Naruto and Sasuke would wear hats and one of the outfits he bought for them at all times while outside. He understood the reason for it, but regardless, Naruto hated every second. The hat made him sweat and was super itchy! At one point it got so bad he had to bite his tongue to distract himself. He wanted to rip it off and fling it as far away as possible.

They made their way through an alley with a few shops and diverging paths. Dense crowds swallowed them up the moment they crossed into the Market District. This place was nowhere near as populated as The Leaf Village, but it was hard not to feel overwhelmed. Naruto noticed Sasuke was walking with a very stiff posture. Was he anxious, too?

"Where would you two like to go?" Zetsu said, turning around.

"Doesn't matter to me." Sasuke was half paying attention as he took in their surroundings.

"I want ramen!" Naruto shouted. A few heads turned his way. "Ramen, ramen, ra-"

Sasuke sprang toward his adoptive sibling and slapped a hand over his mouth. "Shut up, idiot. If we're in disguise, that means we can't act too much like our old selves either. You're gonna get us caught."

"But…I'm hungry."

Zetsu frowned. "Sadly, Sasuke's right, Naruto. We'll see if one of the local restaurants has ramen, but try to draw less attention. We wouldn't want tracker ninja showing up here if word got back to the village."

Naruto dangled his arms in disappointment. "Ugh. Alright."

They stumbled upon a small, hole-in-the-wall shop that served ramen. Well, more like what the staff believed passed for ramen. Naruto wholeheartedly disagreed, and was not shy about letting everyone in the place know.

"Blegh!" he spat, sending a wad of the stuff right back into the sludge-like broth from whence it came. "This is gross. Can I order something else?"

An offended server shot them a look. Zetsu played the part of a nervous patron, smiling to ease tension. The itching underneath Naruto's hat was the last straw. He reached up to snatch it off of his head. Sasuke kicked him under the table and glared.

"Ow! What the hell, Sa-?"

The dark-haired boy's glare stabbed daggers into Naruto. The latter gasped, realizing he almost made two mistakes; first, he forgot the rule never to remove a part of his disguise in public. Second, he was seconds away from saying Sasuke's real name instead of the fake one they'd decided on. The stuck-up jerk picked the name 'Kamo' for whatever reason.

Meanwhile, Zetsu's clone showered their annoyed server with apologies.

"Sorry that my son's not the most well behaved," he said. "It's not easy being a single parent, you know." The server's expression softened a bit at the mention of their difficult situation, but he still wore a subdued scowl. "Could you please take this back? Thank you so much. Now, what else would you like, Menma?"

They wound up ordering three new menu items for 'Menma' to appease him. He liked two of the dishes. Fortunately, Sasuke didn't seem to mind the last one that Naruto thought tasted like sand. Between the three of them, they were able to demolish the meals presented to them and hurried outside amidst a handful of weird looks. Some patrons were still unsettled by Naruto's rudeness, while others spoke in hushed tones. What little Naruto overheard consisted of hastily crafted rumors about why an active ninja was raising two boys all on his own. Zetsu took these comments in stride and led his so-called sons back to the marketplace.

Something about their behavior irked Naruto, even though he was no stranger to stares or insults. He liked the feeling of hanging out with Mr. Zetsu and Sasuke, knowing he was safe, and being part of this new family. Sure, it was a pretty weird situation, and it realllllly hurt having to abandon Ichiraku, but he didn't have to be somewhere people were deceiving him anymore. Obito and Mr. Zetsu gave him a new life where he could just be Naruto. Not a monster, nuisance, or outcast. Just Naruto Uzumaki. Er, Menma technically, but he was free! He was important to someone.

"Thanks for the fun day out," he said, tugging on Zetsu's false sleeve as they left the Market District together.

"Just doing my job," he replied, smiling down at Naruto. Another freakish-looking gesture.

Naruto flinched, but fought through the unpleasantness and smiled back. He looked down at the bag of new clothes and household items he bought. On Mr. Zetsu's opposite side, 'Kamo' carried a stack of small boxes. They'd come away with a pretty nice haul. Just as he was about to consider what they would do after they returned home, a more pressing thought seized his attention.

He skidded to a stop. Mr. Zetsu and Sasuke followed suit, looking his way in confusion.

"Hey," Naruto said in a fragile voice. "I just realized something, Mr. Zetsu."

The plantlike guardian tilted his head. "What is it?"

"Until today, I've never seen you eat. You don't even go to the bathroom. Why's that?"

Sasuke frowned. "That's seriously what you're slowing us down to talk about?"

"What?" Naruto said. "It's a fair question, y'know!"

"I mean, yeah," Sasuke faltered, averting his eyes, "but you could've just waited until we got back."

"A-HA!" Naruto jabbed a finger at his self-proclaimed rival. "So you DO wanna know where it all goes!"

"Eww, no. Gross! You're such a ridiculous loser."

"Pipe down, pipe down," Mr. Zetsu intervened, laughing at their quarrel. "You're right, Naruto. I don't digest food or produce any waste. Because I'm made up of cells from The First Hokage, I can do a lot of things, like survive without food or travel through roots in the ground. If you really want to know, I'll show you what happens to the food I eat when we get back."

They deposited their new purchases in a corner and stood in the living room awaiting Mr. Zetsu's revelation. Despite his protests, Sasuke cracked an eye open to peek. Naruto leaned in with sparkling, expectant eyes. Taking a centering breath, Mr. Zetsu began to change shape. His stomach split down the middle and —

Naruto felt instant regret for pushing the matter. Little did he know that even years down the line, he would never succeed at blocking out the horrors he saw that day. Not only that, but Sasuke would never forgive him. The Sharingan's visual prowess worked almost too well, burning a permanent image into his memory. Not a single sparring session went by for the next two years where he didn't take the frustration at this fact out on his 'idiot' little brother.