"Get up, man," Craig's voice interrupted my sleep.

I opened my eyes lazily and then closed them again for a moment. My hands rubbed at my eyes, almost involuntarily, trying to force myself to become more awake. I sleepily shifted left to look at my alarm clock. It was flashing 12 o' clock. I must have unconsciously unplugged the clock when the alarm went off early in the morning. I looked up, suddenly becoming aware of Craig, who was standing above me, freshly showered and wearing some of my clothes.

"What time is it?" I groaned, sitting up in my bed, which was actually just a mattress on the floor.

"It's 2 o' clock," Craig replied, smiling, "You've been sleeping forever."

I ran my hand through my short hair and unexpectedly let out a yawn.

"I'm not a morning person," I said softly.

"I know," Craig said with a smile, "You used to sleep over at my house like every weekend."

"Oh yeah," I smiled too, slightly embarrassed, "I guess I sort of forgot. It's been so long since we've hung out."

With my blunt acknowledgment that we hadn't been friends for over a year, Craig fell silent. I didn't mean to make it awkward. It didn't matter to me anymore because we were friends again. Craig looked down at me apologetically. Then, he sat down next to me.

"I'm sorry about that," Craig tried to explain himself, "When you and Jimmy started fighting--"

"Don't worry about it man," I said, shaking my head, "It's okay. I understand."

"But, listen," Craig said, looking upset, "I didn't mean anything I said to you. I know you never meant for the prank to go that far. My mental state wasn't so good around the time of the shooting. I mean...I didn't mean..."

"Craig, it's okay," I repeated, "really. You don't have to explain yourself. We all say things we don't mean."

"Oh..." was all Craig could say.

We were both silent again. I stared intently at Craig, who was looking solemnly at the floor. Suddenly, he looked up at me. For a long moment, we looked thoughtfully at each other. Craig's mouth opened slightly as if he were going to say something. He looked extremely vulnerable. In that instant I felt the strongest desire for him.

"I have to be at work in an hour and a half," I said suddenly, looking away in order to detract from the awkwardness of the current situation, "You can hang out here while I'm gone. Have people over or whatever. I don't care."

"I was actually thinking of heading over to The Dot for lunch," Craig replied, "Do you want to grab a bite before your shift?"

"Sure," I answered, becoming a bit excited at the thought of going out to eat with a friend, something I hadn't done in a very long time, "When did you want to go?"

"Whenever you're ready," Craig said, "but hurry up, man. I'm hungry."

"Alright," I yawned, standing up, "I'll take a quick shower and then we'll head out."

"I'll be out here," he gestured toward the family room. And then he disappeared through the door.

As I grabbed a set of clean clothes, entered the bathroom, and turned on the shower, I was in a growing state of euphoria. Everything seemed so much brighter with Craig back in my life. I couldn't help but smile as I undressed and stepped into the shower.

Fifteen minutes later I was dressed and ready to go. Craig was sitting on the couch watching the news as I emerged from my room holding my car keys.

"Ready?" I said coolly.

Craig turned off the TV and stood up briskly. "Yeah, let's go," he replied.

There was an odd silence as we walked down the stairs to the ground floor where my car was parked. I wanted to start conversation, but I couldn't think of anything to say. Did Craig still feel uncomfortable around me? Why wasn't he saying anything? As we got into my car I glanced over at Craig. He was sitting there, emotionless, staring straight ahead. I started the car and shifted into gear.

"Are you alright," I said finally, as we exited my complex.

"Huh?" Craig muttered dreamily. He seemed to be in a very dazed state.

"Craig," I said louder, trying to get his attention. He looked over at me. He still seemed to be in thought and his eyes looked somehow saddened.

"What's up?" he replied in a somewhat hollow tone.

"Is everything okay?" I inquired, "You seem really out of it."

"Oh," he said, raising his eyebrows slightly, "yeah, I'm fine."

He didn't sound like he was fine. I didn't say anything. I just focused on the road. I felt slightly let down. Perhaps Craig was having second thoughts about being my friend again. Or maybe he really was just using me for my apartment. Would we still be on speaking terms after he went back to his house, or would it go back to the way it was before?

"Do you ever wonder if you'll find someone you can be with forever?" Craig said suddenly in a very serious manner.

"What do you mean?" I asked, taken aback. I tried to sound at ease, but his comment had come out of nowhere.

"I don't know," Craig continued strongly, "It's just that I've only ever had two real relationships. I mean, if you count Manny."

Craig looked like he felt guilty for an instant, but then it was gone.

"And when Ashley never came back from England I just sort of gave up hope," he continued sorrowfully, "I thought Ashley was the one for me, but she couldn't have felt the same way. I mean, if she couldn't deal with something as stupid as a mental disease then how could she possibly be with me forever?"

"You're still hung up on her?" I asked, slightly in awe that I was having this conversation.

"No, that's the thing," he said getting a bit louder, "I don't want to be with her anymore. And I don't want to be with anyone else either. I've had plenty of opportunity to start things with girls this year, but I haven't felt up to it. I just don't feel like I connect with anyone anymore."

"Well this is just Degrassi, man," I said, trying to be helpful, "There's a whole world of girls out there. I'm sure there's one that you can connect with."

"But what if there's not? What if I'm destined to be alone forever?"

"Come on, dude," I said, slowing down as the stoplight ahead turned from yellow to red, "You know you don't have to be with somebody to be happy."

Craig looked as though he was going to say something more, but then he stopped. He sat back in his chair, becoming more relaxed.

"Are you happy?" he said after a little while, in a much calmer voice.

I considered the question for a few seconds. Surely I was happy without a significant other. I didn't need to be romantically involved with anybody to be happy. Right? I imagined myself kissing Craig momentarily, but I quickly pushed the image away.

"Yeah, I'm happy," I answered, "I don't have anyone and I'm fine with that."

This statement seemed to be the end of our unsettling conversation. Within minutes Craig was already going on about the upcoming final exams. By the time we reached The Dot we were deep in conversation about Kwan's harsh grading scale. As we sat down at a booth inside, my mind was far from the vulnerable state it had been in during our chat in the car. Everything was okay again and all apprehension about Craig's dedication to our friendship was gone.

We were friends eating lunch together. This was all that I'd wanted for the past year. It's odd how something so ordinary can be so comforting. A conversation, a meal, a smile; these very ordinary things can go a long way. At least for me, anyway. This is all I need. For now.