FROM THE ASHES

Chapter 8

Anakin was displeased with Obiwan's attitutude."I am not up to meditating, and you can't make me. My will and strength in the force is strong and you cannot penetrate it without my cooperation. Can't you just leave me alone, can't you see I've been through enough?"

"Anakin, how long are you going to play the pity card?"

Anakin turned to face him but wouldn't meet his eyes. "As long as it takes." There was a deep silence as Obiwan tried to look directly into Anakin's eyes, but he closed them.

"Wait, Obiwan, listen, the babies are waking up!" Anakin was momentarily spared an unwanted confrontation. He made it look as good as he could walking with his hands out, pretending to have a hard time finding where the door was. Obiwan followed him as far as the doorway and stood watching. Anakin stood over them, 'feeling' for them, and patting their stomachs. "I have to feed the babies again, when they're this young, their bellies can't hold much so they eat every few hours."

"Let me help you, Anakin." Obiwan entered the room and carried them out to the sofa. "I think they need a change of diaper, do you need any help?"

"Yes, Obiwan, I do, thank you for offering." Anakin laughed inside. He brought warmed bottles for their feeding, and leaned down and carefully placed Leia in Anakin's arms. Anakin stared at the opposite wall as he closed his hands safely around his daughter. Obiwan stared at Anakin, for a moment wondering what was going on. He handed Anakin a bottle, holding it right in front of him. Anakin was too smart to reach for it.

"Oh, I'm sorry, here's the bottle, Anakin." Anakin played it good pretending not to be able to find it until Obiwan placed it directly in his hand where he could 'feel' it. Anakin's acting improved as he aimed the bottle's nipple away from Leia's mouth at first, letting a tiny bit of milk drip onto her pajamas, then finally used one hand to lead the other to the tiny rosebud mouth. Obiwan watched this display with much pity for Anakin, letting go of his momentary suspicions, yet still sensing something wasn't quite right. He sat down beside him and fed Luke. They burped the babies, then replaced them in their bed. Obiwan waved his hand over the babies, using the force to settle them calmly. They cooed awhile, then fell back to sleep. Obiwan returned to the sofa where Anakin was still sitting.

"Thank you, Obiwan. You've bonded with the babies very nicely. Padme and I are honored you will be a part of their lives." An innocent grin covered Anakin's face, but Obiwan strained to see through it, both with his eyes and his force sensitivity. While Anakin was relaxed, he tried to probe his mind. All he was able to discern was that the darkness had been lifted from his mind, the darkness that had been there while Anakin's eyes had been scarred and clouded. Now that they were healthy again, the light in his life force was the same as it had been before he was ever went blind. What did this mean, Obiwan considered. Light and images were reaching his brain, so why didn't his mind perceive that?

Obiwan realized that if he were to search Anakin's feelings, he couldn't warn him first, or he'd put his guard up. He was strong in the force as well, and his mind was very strong. He had done well at blocking out whatever his true feelings were ever since returning from the Coruscant medical center. Obiwan tried to think of a way to remove the psychological block that he assumed was causing Anakin's blindness. "I'm going now, Anakin. Back to the temple. When Padme is home to take care of the babies, or makes other arrangements for their care, I will be back for you. I will help you, but you have to want it."

"I don't need your help, Obiwan. Forget it, I'm not going back to the temple, I'm not talking to Yoda, I'm not meditating with you."

"Anakin, don't you want to see? I can't believe you don't want to try."

"I deserve this, Obiwan. Leave me alone." Obiwan was so frustrated, he turned and walked out without saying goodbye. Anakin waited until he heard him flying away, then peeked through the window to make sure he was really gone. When he was certain the coast was clear, he got out his little video game and started to play again. Virtual reality fighting was the only action he'd ever participate in again, he thought. If he 'died' in his game, he could always press the reset button. Life wasn't like that. So he had to avoid it.

Once he got back to the temple, Obiwan walked straight down the hallway to consult with Yoda. "Master Yoda, I am at a loss to help Anakin. He refuses all attempts to reach him. He feels he deserves what happened to him, yet he is afraid of being hurt again. I cannot believe he doesn't even want to see."

"Help him, you cannot, unless willing he is."

"I know, that is why I am frustrated."

"Healed his eyes are, but not his inner self or mind."

"Is this what is causing the mental block that is preventing his vision from returning?" Yoda leaned on his stick, tightened his lips, and looked backup at Obiwan. "What is it you see when search his mind and feelings you do?"

"I see light, Yoda, it's not dark inside his mind like when his eyes were broken. I know that light is coming in, I don't know why he isn't letting it through."

"Does not want it, could it be?"

"Who wouldn't want to see?"

"Blind he stays, hide he can." Obiwan's eyes lit up.

"You mean, this is metaphorical for the darkness he feels for his actions, his mistakes?"

Yoda nodded. "Is this what is keeping his mind from seeing the light from his eyes?"

"Bring young Skywalker to me you must. Search him myself for the answer I will."

"He refuses to come here. Can't you try anyway? Let's try to reach Anakin through the force."

Anakin heard Padme coming and quickly turned off his game and stuffed it under the pillow he was leaning on. She strolled inside in a long burgundy velvet dress, her hair down in long tendrils. She was so beautiful, it was hard for him not to focus his eyes on her. She looked at him with such sadness on her face, then put on a brave smile, for herself more than him since she thought he couldn't see, and walked over to sit beside him. "There's my good husband." She said with a passionate kiss. Having her face so close to his, he was hard pressed not to look at her. He realized he was taking a great deal of enjoyment out of his own life by doing this, but the die had been cast. "How are the babies?" She asked.

"Fine. I fed them twice. Obiwan was here, he helped me."

"Ah, Obiwan. Did he have any answers as to how you can be helped?"

"I told you Padme, I can't be helped. Don't talk about it anymore. Let's just enjoy our lives any way we can under the circumstances."

"Anakin, if your eyes seem fully functional, there has to be another reason you aren't seeing."

"Right, it's because that horrible hospital ruined me."

She bit her lip and touched his cheek in sympathy. "That was tragic. I didn't know if you wanted to talk about this, but you should know. That's where I was today. I had them investigated, and the results are in. You know that rehabilitation center they wanted to send you to? I found out it was crooked, the droids at the hospital were sending people there when they could have been cured! They were programmed to to do to make more money for the center!"

Anakin sat up straight and looked shocked. "Are you serious, it wasn't just me?"

"Oh, no, Anakin. You had better be glad you didn't let them 'cap' your eyes with those patches like they wanted to. People who have had that done had their eyes destroyed, they had to have them removed and replaced with prosthetics."

"Can these replacement eyes see?"

"No, they don't work! They remove the person's eyes, then replace them with false ones, and all the while the hospital and rehab center gain credits. They keep then in the rehab for long periods of time, collecting from their insurance. Then once they remain blind for life, they offer more expensive services and devices. They're actually blinding beings for their own profit! I heard many people and Gungans were needlessly blinded, or not cured when their eyes could have been cured."

When Anakin heard this, he was leveled emotionally. He was even more thankful his eyes had been able to be healed. How could he keep playing blind now? He owed his own sight to the good fortune of Padme not allowing him to be sent to the rehab center though he had wanted to go, then her insisting he go to the one on Coruscant. He shuddered to think of all those beings being blinded for life out of the greed of a few. "Have they been stopped?"

"Yes, they are being shut down, those responsible are being arrested. There will be lawsuits as well"

"And the patients? Will they ever see again?"

Padme spoke sadly. "No."

"Oh, no." Anakin pitied them so much. "Can't they be brought here, and retreated, as I was?"

"Some will be, but it's too late, the damage is done."

"It wasn't too late for me, my eyes had healed scarred, but they were still able to clear it up."

"You were very lucky your eyes are no longer scarred, Anakin, but you still can't see." He put his head down, feeling guilty over not telling her he could.

"At least my eyes are healed. Is there a chance for any of them?"

"Some have already had their eyes removed. It chills me to think that could have been you."

"Me too." He said with a cold chill running down his spine.

"We are bringing about a dozen here for the treatment you got, the rest, such a shame."

"Oh Padme, thank you for saving me from that center." He squeezed her tight. He was aghast to imagine anyone doing such a thing. Having known how terrible it was to be blind, he felt so much for those who had suffered that final fate, and rejoiced again inside that he was able to escape it and be completely cured. And here he was, lying about.it, this was now one more thing to feel guilty about. He'd have to find a way to get out of it, but now was not the time.

Over at the Jedi temple, Obiwan and Yoda faced each other and closed their eyes, drifting into deep meditation, seeking to search Anakin's mind and feelings through his powerful life force.