FROM THE ASHES

Chapter 12

Obiwan would not leave the hospital until Anakin's surgery was complete and the droids had told him he had come through it all right..He felt better knowing this medical center was not like that scandelous one on Naboo, this was the best one in Coruscant. It had healed his eyes when the other one had ruined their healing process. It had delivered Padme's babies and everyone made it through. Anakin should be all right, but Obiwan still worried. He snoozed in a chair all night, wanting to be there for Anakin when he came to. It was the next morning before he started to stir. He moaned and turned his head, then opened his eyes. He let his woozy head clear as he focused his eyes. The first thing he saw was Obiwan in the chair, and he was touched. "Obiwan, how long have you been there?"

Obiwan woke up, too, and was glad to see Anakin awake and coherent. "I never left you, my friend."

"You are a good and honorable man, Obiwan Kenobi. I am not worthy of you, but I will try to be."

"Anakin, whatever is bothering you can wait until you are better."

"I'm getting tired of having things wrong with me, Obiwan. Will I ever be a okay?"

"We're going to make sure of it, my brother."

The droids explained that Anakin's knee ligaments had been torn, and the ones that could not be repaired were replaced with synthetic duplicates. His knee was totally repaired and would function normally, but it had to heal from surgery internally as well as externally. Then he'd have weeks of therapy to endure.

"I have fake parts inside my leg?" Anakin said with a strange look on his face. "That's weird to think about. How long before I can walk on it?"

The droid told him he would be gotten out of bed and made to walk on crutches in a couple days, but it would be at least a week more before he could even try to step down on it. Then it should be healed enough to begin therapy. He should be walking carefully within a month, but it would take a little longer for it to be strong enough for normal use. For a Jedi, it would have to be even stronger, since he made many moves and jumps with his legs. The droids explained that many famous athletes throughout the galaxy had this same surgery, and they had returned to their games as good as new. This encouraged Anakin greatly, but he was still depressed for now, though he was dealing with it a lot better than blindness. He knew he was lying there helpless again, with nowhere to go when the time game to go 'home.'

Obiwan went back to report to Yoda all that had happened. Yoda was sure there had to be a cosmic reason for what had occured, and he would meditate on it. He ordered Obiwan to bring Anakin back to the temple for his convalescense, though he sensed this would bring strong opposition. Obiwan's new padawan would have to wait awhile for his training. Obiwan went past the apartment and saw Padme standing on the balcony as her parents departed with both babies. He watched as they flew away with them but not Padme. What did it mean? He didn't interfere, but stored this imformation away in his memory for future reference. He then returned to the med center to visit Anakin.

Obiwan entered Anakin's room and found him in much better spirits, sitting up, eating heartily. He turned to look at him with a real smile."Hello, master, thank you for coming back"

"Did you really think I wouldn't?"

"I wonder sometimes why you put up with me. Padme doesn't."

Obiwan put his head down, not knowing if he should relay the news to him yet. "How long are you going to be here?"

"I have, let's see, 5 or 6 more days." He counted in his head, looking up at the ceiling.

"Then what?"

"I will be released, but must return for my therapy."

"Anakin, what are you going to do?"

Anakin's expression turned dismal. "I don't know."

"You're not going home?"

"Obiwan, I don't have a home. Padme Amidala's apartment is not my home. I will not let her 'keep' me after what she said. I do have some pride left."

"Then you will have to come back to the temple."

"No, I told you, I can never go back in there again!"

"Anakin, you can't walk! What are you going to do, you can't live on the streets."

Anakin closed his eyes and grabbed his hair with both hands. "I am such a loser! I have no money, no home, nowhere to go, I don't own anything. I've never been anything but a slave and a Jedi and a 'kept' husband. Maybe I can secure employment as a mechanic of some type and afford a meager dwelling of my own."

"Is that what you really want?"

"No, it isn't, but I don't know what else I can do. I don't want to talk about it right now, please. The time will come when must deal with the answers but right now I want to relax a bit." He turned away and waved Obiwan off with his hand. Obiwan shook his head.

"I still have your lightsaber, whenever you're ready." Anakin glared at him, but made no comment. He thought he had made it clear, he was not a Jedi anymore. Then suddenly, thinking about little he owned made him remember what else he'd lost.

"Do you know what happened to my stuff? The few things I took from Padme's were wrapped in my cloak.."

"Oh, I saw one of the paramedics take it into the ambulance. I'm sure the hospital has it around here somewhere." When the next nurse droid entered the room, they inquired, and he brought the bundle from a locker and placed it on the foot of the bed. Anakin's eyes lit up as he found his little video game in it, undamaged. Though it would always hold the unpleasant memory of being caught in his act, he still wanted to play with it. "At least I will have something to pass my time here in my solitude." He faked a smile. Obiwan moved the personal items off the bed and into a chair. Anakin would need them later. They were all he owned in the universe. How sad that was now that he felt so alone.

"I'm going for now, Anakin. Is there anything I can do for you?"

"How about bringing me something to read. That would be nice. I'm going to be bored out of my mind lying here."

Obiwan smiled at him. "Sure thing, brother. I'll see you tommorrow."

When Obiwan returned to the temple, he had an urgent message from Padme, asking her to come meet with her. Now that he was invited into the situation, he was going. He went immediately to her apartment, where she met him with red puffy eyes.

"Obiwan, have you heard anything from Anakin? He left here, and I don't think he'd go back to the temple."

"He didn't." She told exactly the same story Anakin did, so Obiwan knew neither of them were lying about the situation. He closed his eyes and shook his head in dismay. She said she had to talk to him, they had two children to worry about and had to find a way to work things out. "Obiwan, you have to help me find him. I know you can sense him through the force."

"That won't be necessary, Padme. I know where he is."

Her face looked shocked but interested."Where is he?"

"He's in the med center again. He has had surgery."

"What happened?"

"You didn't see the incident on the news? I was hit by a drunken speeder driver and was falling to my potential doom when Anakin appeared out of nowhere to jump up and save me."

"He did?"

"Yes, it was an amazing rescue, true to form."

She almost laughed. "He certainly found a unique way of letting you know he could see."

Obiwan almost laughed too. "Yes, it did work out that way. No confession could have been any better." His tone turned more serious. "Padme, his leg was badly injured."

"Oh, no, is he going to be all right?"

"Yes, his surgery was a success and he will make a full recovery. But for now, he can't walk."

"What's he going to do?"

"He has expressed that he will not return here to have you take care of him."

"It was because of all the things that were said.." She bit her finger and looked regretful.

"Regardless of why, arrangements must be made for him. He can't go out into the streets on crutches with nowhere to go."

Padme's eyes began to fill with tears. "Can I go to him?"

"I don't think it's the best thing, Padme. He doesn't want you to come only out of sympathy." She searched her own feelings for a moment. Was it? Or did she still really care? She thought a minute. At least she knew where he was. She wasn't going to go running to him and forgive him just because he was hurt. His injury had been all too convenient. "Obiwan are you sure he didn't hurt himself on purpose?"

"Padme, no. I can understand your suspicion, I even accused him of exaggerating myself, but I saw his leg, all of his ligaments were torn and it was hanging loose like it was coming off. It happened because he tried to land a jump with the weight of me and the rate of my fall increasing the velocity. He risked himself to save me. I was very fortunate he was at the right place at the right time. It must have been the force."

Padme put her fingers to her quivering lips. "He must be in such pain."

"He was, but he's doing better now. If you don't want to run to him, leave him alone. Padme, if you were to go to him now, I don't even think he'd see you."

She walked away and gazed out the window. "Then perhaps it is best to wait."

"And let him suffer awhile, is that it?"

"I didn't mean that. Obiwan, I'm not going to go running to him. Not now."

Obiwan had no comment at all as he turned and left

The next day when Obiwan returned to visit Anakin, he handed him the reading material he had requested. Anakin looked through the magazines. "Ah, Podracing Times, Galaxy Mechanics, Speeder and Pilot, any variety here? I feel I've been stereotyped." He also handed him a tabloid.

"You can let me know if there is any dirt on any of us in there." He snickered. Then he gave him a novel. "This is someone's fantasy of the Clone Wars, I thought it might be funny to read it and see how accurately it matches with what we really did."

"What we really did was too wild for anyone's imagination, Obiwan. Maybe you and I should write our memoirs." He said, looking kindly at his friend. "Thank you, this should keep me from dying of boredom for the rest of my time in here." Obiwan found it curious Anakin didn't even ask about Padme. Then finally, he did, sort of. "Obiwan, are my babies okay? Have you seen them?"

"Padme's parents came to take them to Naboo for awhile."

"Then I know they'll be in good, safe, loving hands. No need to worry about them, though I do miss them. Does this mean you've see Padme? You didn't tell her about me, did you?"

"I'm sorry, Anakin, but she asked me outright, she seemed very concerned." Anakin's voice became agitated: he held out his hands in midair. "Then why isn't she here?"

"She, felt this wasn't the right time."

"She thinks I'm using this to get back on her good side, to use sympathy to make her forgive me? I won't have it, Obiwan. And I won't have her taking care of me. I don't want to go back over there and play poor crippled husband again. I know how she feels about that."

"She loves you, she wouldn't look at it that way."

Anakin gave him a strange look. "She does not love me anymore, Obiwan. I won't accept her sympathy, even if she decides to give it, which is unlikely. It's all right, I don't need her. I don't need anybody." He looked down at started leafing through one of his magazines.

"Anakin, look at me.."

"You can go now, Obiwan, thank you for the books. Goodbye." Anakin kept his face in the books and only momentarily glanced up to see his reaction. Obiwan was struck by the cold lack of feeling in his eyes. He was now also shutting out all his feelings for Padme, as he had run from the horror of his memories of his dark deeds as Vader, and the experience at Mustafar. Obiwan knew that he had to get him back to the temple to help him, or he would drift further into his emotional wasteland, and it would take him to places he should not go.