Disclaimers: Third verse, same as the first...

Notes: This will be a little difficult. I broke a major blood vessel in my left middle finger, so it's very hard to type. Nonetheless, I shall try hard to get this out. Thank you for your wonderful responses to the first chapter. I'm honored you guys took time to read this.

Reflections

By Sean Montgomery

When Kenji was five Kenshin decided that he needed a good job. There was nothing much being offered, he realized, but he also knew that the family could not live on what little money the dojo gained. They were fine as they were - with just the three of them it didn't take too much to get food - but Kenshin knew that, as the man of the house, he should be making money for them as well.

"But Kenshin, what could you do? There aren't many open positions out there, if any at all." Kaoru said after he asked her opinion.

"That's why I believe I should spend a day looking for a job, that I do. There has to be something around here I can do. Maybe working in a booth, or a restaurant."

"Do you think Tae would let you work at the Akabeko? Surely there could be some need for work there."

"It doesn't get much business, but I'll check anyway. Maybe I'll head into town tomorrow."

The conversation ended there once Kenji burst into the room covered with mud and Kaoru all but carried him to the bath. Kenshin, worrying about the condition of his son's clothes, decided he would go into town tomorrow to look. If Kenji ripped any more of his clothes, he would have to wear his nice clothes and... Kenshin didn't even want to begin thinking about that. He started cutting fish to distract himself.

____________________

Somehow, Urama found Kenshin before Kenshin found Urama.

The former assassin's hunt had been fruitless the entire day. Kenshin had searched the entire town, offering to help in any way needed for his family (who he secretly hoped would grow bigger in the next couple of years). Venders and owners and workers had all turned him down, saying that they were pleased with the wonderful charm of the red-headed man, but had no position to offer. In his return trip home, after mustering enough hope to try again tomorrow, Urama showed up out of nowhere, saying he needed to talk to Kenshin about a possible job.

"Something that might interest you, I think. If you're willing, anyway."

"I'm most willing, that I am." Kenshin had said, delighted to see the man again after so long. The two men agreed to go to the police office that very instant and decide on what Urama would propose.

Kenshin left the police station happy, but curious why he felt like he had just made a wrong decision.

____________________

Kenshin never knew that Kenji would catch on so quickly with things. The big blow came when Kenji finally understood the enormity of Kenshin's job months after he had started it.

"You're leaving us?"

He asked it so suddenly that the entire commotion at the dinner table stopped. Kenshin, mouth full of broth, looked surprised at Kenji's perceptive question, glancing at Kaoru a moment before answering. "Not permanently, Kenji. I'll be leaving town early, but I'll always come back."

"But you'll be gone. You're leaving us."

"I'm not leaving you, Kenji. I'm going to a in Japan to help people. I will leave for a little bit, but I'll come back."

It took a moment for Kenji to place exactly what Kenshin meant. His brow was furrowed in concentration for a bit while deep in thought. "Do you always help people?"

"That's right. He won't be gone for very long. Just a few days at the most. It's just like a few weeks ago." Kaoru said. Kenshin nodded in agreement.

"Why are you going to help people again? Can't you do something here?"

Kenshin's face darkened for a moment, remembering that his son wouldn't know the full reason until he was older. "I'm going to help people because that's what I know how to do."

"You can do other things too. You don't have to leave."

"I don't *want* to leave, Kenji. It's just--"

"Yes you do." he said suddenly. "You wouldn't have taken the job if you didn't."

Kenshin recoiled at the sudden outburst of emotion. "That's not true Kenji. I--"

His son didn't even wait for him to explain. He jumped from his spot and left the kitchen, a thundercloud of rampant emotions. Kenshin gave a deep sigh after he left.

"I don't understand why he would get up and leave like that. With no respect for you!" Kaoru's brows furrowed at the thought.

"He's only five. He doesn't understand all of this yet."

"That doesn't matter. He could have been more respectful."

A deep paused followed. Kenshin felt a guilty pain begin to take over. "Should I go talk to him?"

"I'll go." Kaoru stood and moved to the door. "Maybe he'll understand it better..."

Kaoru stopped at the shoji, her hand covering her mouth as soon as the words left. She turned and looked at Kenshin. "Kenshin, I..."

"He'll understand it better if *you* explain it to him?" he whispered, his gaze falling to the table before him.

"I didn't mean it like that."

"I know you didn't." he answered, refusing to meet her gaze. A few moments, seemingly an eternity in a matter of seconds, passed. "You should check on him, that you should."

Kaoru hesitantly walked out of the room, her footsteps echoing in Kenshin's mind. Of course Kenji would understand Kaoru better. She was with him more often now, with him leaving as often as he did. But it was his job. He did what he was told. He just never expected it to be so often...

He fought back a tear with everything inside of him. Closing his eyes made it fall into the fabric of his gi. What had he done?

____________________

Kaoru found Kenji sitting in the middle of his room, huddled in a ball and attempting to hide his tears. Motherly instinct kicking in, she moved next to him and placed him in her lap, smiling when he tried to wipe his tears away. "It's not bad to miss him, you know."

"Why does he have to leave again, Okaa-san? Can't he stay home?"

"It's his job, Kenji. He does it so we can keep living here. So we can eat. You don't want us to not have anything to eat, do you?"

Kenji shook his head, sniffling all the while. "We don't play anymore, Okaa-san. He comes home and sleeps. And then he leaves again."

"That's not all he does. Your Otou-san works around here, too. He's a very busy man, if you really think about it. But he does it for us."

"I don't want him to work. I want him to stay here with us." His voice broke in the end, signaling more tears. Kaoru held him closer. "It's okay to be sad, Kenji. I miss him too."

"I'm not sad." Kenji said, looking at her with fire in his eyes. "I'm mad."

"You're mad?"

"Because he leaves all the time. And it makes you sad. He doesn't need to. There's no point for him to!"

Kenji burst into tears again, but this time she thought differently. His fingers clutched her kimono in anger, the tears falling from his eyes like drops of fire on her neck. Sad hearts she could sooth. This...

This was the anger of her son. Relentless and unforgiving for reasons he didn't know. Directed at his father, her husband, who, unknown to them, was standing outside of the door and who heard his son's outburst. His heart broke at the memory. He walked away quietly from his son's room and occupied himself, rolling the futon down for himself and Kaoru. As he prepared for bed, he wondered how he was going to face Kenji in the morning and what on earth he would say.

He wouldn't have to say anything. Early that morning, Kaoru was the only person who said goodbye to him. Kenji downright refused to leave his room.

____________________

In eleven years, things hadn't changed much. Kenshin still helped the people of Japan, still hiding the reason from his son. Kenji was still angry with him, so much so that when Kenshin refused to teach him the fighting craft he had perfected he instead sought out his father's former master. His homecomings were rare, mostly when Kenshin was gone (which seemed uncanny to Kaoru that he would show up that same day), but when his father was there, he would have nothing to do with him.

One day, that all changed.

Kenji had decided to come home one afternoon, taking the only two inhabitants of the Kamiya-Himura dojo by complete surprise. Kaoru met him first just after he walked through the gate. She would have ran to him, flinging her arms around him like she always did, but one glance at him made her stop. The look on his face wasn't even close to anger. The boy seemed enraged.

"Where is he?" he growled, not awaiting her answer and marching straight past her. Kaoru was rooted to the spot for a moment before answering. "He's making dinner. Kenji, what--"

The hope that he really wanted to see Kenshin died when she saw him dart for the kitchen. As fast as she could, she followed him through the dojo until he came to the kitchen seeking out the man he was seemingly ready to harm. Kenshin was cutting bits of fish when he entered. Kenji finally let everything out.

"*You're* the Hitokiri Battousai?!" he screamed, throwing his arms at the man before him. Kenshin didn't even jump, as if he wasn't surprised that Kenji was there. "*You're* the manslayer of the Revolution?!"

Kenshin looked at his son, complete shock and panic written in them. Kenji didn't wait for him to say anything. "Why didn't you tell me? What possessed you to keep this from me?"

Kenshin set the knife on the cutting board, silently praying for his nerves to be calmed. "Who told you that?" he asked calmly.

"You answer me first. Are you really the Battousai?"

Kenshin took a deep breath. Kaoru felt the atmosphere grow thick with Kenji's rage and Kenshin's sorrow. "Yes." he whispered.

Kenji seemed mortified. "You lied to me. You've lied to me this entire time."

"I haven't lied to you."

"Yes you have. You've been pretending you where nothing more but a simple dojo master's husband. Keeping this sheet in place over who you really are, *hiding* it from me! You've been lying to me this *entire* time!"

"It's not as simple as that, Kenji. There's so much more you don't know."

"I know enough. Enough to know that you aren't the man my mother thinks you are."

Kenshin blinked. "What do you mean?"

"You've made her think that you're some kind of charming man, a hard worker, someone who cares for those who he's close to. I know who you really are. You're the feared assassin who killed in the shadows! You murdered nearly a hundred men in less than six months!"

Kenshin's eyes widened. Only one other man knew that... "Who told you this?"

Kenji breathed deeply, trying to control his rampant emotions. "Master Hiko told me."

____________________

Kenji left soon after, saying he needed to get back to Kyoto, how he couldn't stand to be under the roof of a liar. In his wake, the dojo was quite, as if there weren't two people occupying the location. The dinner was left uncooked and uneaten. The evening wore on, an incredible weight suddenly placed on two person's shoulders. Kenshin was quiet for the entire evening until Kaoru could stand it no longer.

"It isn't your fault." she whispered to him, watching the candlelight dance across his features. He seemed unfazed, as if she had never spoken to him. Even while she tried not to, she eventually fell asleep. Kenshin remained awake the rest of the night, trying ti figure out what he would do about his son's anger that had turned into pure rage.

"{It wasn't supposed to happen this way...}"

______________________________

The truth comes out. Could anyone imagine what this would be like? Poor Kenshin...

Now that I think about it, the start of this chapter kind of sounded like Akai Kitsune's fic 'Diary of a Manslayer'. That was totally unintentional. Five years of age just works for some people, I guess.

(Reviewer Responses - because I can't email some of you)

TOKI1 - I like Kenji too. Could you imagine what kind of a spitfire this kid would be with Kenshin and Kaoru's genes? Scary stuff I tell you. In any case, I hope I'm doing him justice for you.

MS. ZEAL - Hopefully, this chapter answers your questions. In the early stages of developing this story, I almost forgot to add why he was angry. *sweatdrop*

CHIBI YUUSHI - Honestly, your review almost made me cry (not an easy feat). Thank you so much for sympathizing with my situation. You were so heartfelt and honest... I'm glad you took time to review. I won't place Seisouhen ANYWHERE in this story. WAY to depressing if you ask me...

MAEVE RIANNON - I'm glad you felt that way. That's exactly what I wanted to capture. I couldn't imagine Kenji hating his father from the get-go, so I'm sure there where some personal moments in there somewhere. Can you imagine what Watsuki could have done with that? Oh, boy... *laughs*

TANUKIGIRL22 - A faithful one! *laughs* Thanks for the encouragement. Kenji isn't seen very much as far as the manga goes, and his personality was hardly touched in the OAV. Hopefully, if Watsuki were reading this, he would agree with how I'm portraying his characters. *gulp*

MISAOSHIRU - Thanks! Here's a hint: take any little kid you know, and you can put Kenji in there somewhere. My muse for him (Allan) has done about everything you've read about in chapter two, including pulling my hair. He's very strong willed too, so that makes him more like a real life Kenji in my eyes.

BABOWONSUNI - Thanks! It's good to see some new faces. Great encouragement for me. I hope you continue to like it.

SAIYAN BRAT878 - Thank you for checking this out. I don't know how soon I can get out chapters, but I'll try.

LIZZIE - Potential! Whoo-hoo! I love hearing that word! Thank you very much!

See you on the next chapter!