A/N : A little time lapse to this chapter, since things needed to move on a bit. I apologise in advance for lack of actual Spuffy but I promise there will be some very soon.
(For disclaimer, etc. - see chapter 1)

Chapter 15

"Well, I was startin' to wonder if I'd ever see the day when I'd get this far with you" Doyle smirked as he pushed the chair in for Cordelia and moved around the table to sit opposite her, "You and me on a dinner date? Figured that'd be another month at least before we got to this"

"Stop" Cordy blushed slightly at his words, "You make me sound like I didn't even like you"

"I was startin' to get that distinct impression darlin'" Doyle admitted, "Somehow I wasn't translating 'Get out of my way and leave me alone you stupid little leprechaun' as 'My God you're the most gorgeous hunk of a man I ever met'" he told her with a look.

"It's called playing hard to get, Doyle" she pointed out, trying not to let him embarrass her too much, but he was one of the few people who seemed to be able to manage it somehow. Maybe it was because she liked him more than she'd thought, but then Cordy had started to realise that if she really did feel something for the Irishman she needed to do something about it, or she was going to end up miserable, like her friends.

It was a whole month since she'd caught Buffy and Spike kissing in the office at the Bronze, and she was fairly certain something more than that had happened later. Ever since they'd both been so out of sorts, not at all happy, and she hated to see it.

"So, what changed your mind then, princess?" Doyle was eager to know, "My Irish charm finally just get the better of you, or was there a bigger reason for you suddenly accepting my offer of dinner?"

"It was kind of you" she told him as she glanced at the menu in her hands and then back at the man opposite her, "Kind of Buffy and Spike"

"Ah, yes, our two favourite blondes and their interesting little relationship" Doyle sighed, "I could bang their heads together, so I could"

"It's crazy, I mean they are so totally into each other" Cordy shook her head, "And yet she's still with Angel, and he's pretending he doesn't care and I just can't believe how nuts they're acting"

"It's frustrating enough working with 'em, I know" Doyle agreed, "But you try going home at night and enduring an evenin' with the lad" he complained, "I mean, Spike's my mate, like a brother even, but there's only so much more I can take of this. He's either drinkin' himself into oblivion, or he's shut in his room writing songs loud enough to wake the dead" he told the woman opposite him who frowned.

"Buffy isn't any happier" she sighed, "I want to talk to her about it but... it's been a while since we were the kind of friends that share all that stuff, but I still know things aren't right" she explained, "Her eyes used to light up when she saw Angel, now it's like she barely notices he's there. Not that I'm saying she should make things better with Angel, cos trust me, he's had his share of affairs too"

"Really?" Doyle frowned, "Didn't think the big lunk-head had it in him to be the unfaithful type, doesn't look too bright"

"He does the brooding block of wood thing pretty well, but a devious brain works behind that caveman brow" she said knowingly as they both looked at their menus and told the waiter who had just arrived at their table what they would like to eat.

"Well, so far we've been out on this date for thirty minutes and all we've talked about is Buffy and Spike's lives" Doyle said, checking his watch, "How about we try to go the next five minutes at least talking about somethin' much more charmin? Like say, you?" he smirked as Cordelia nodded her head.

"Couldn't have picked a better topic myself" she giggled, already enjoying herself much more than she'd expected too.

"Will?" Oz said her name again, jostling her shoulders when she didn't respond.

They were laid out on the couch at her apartment, his arm around her as they snuggled and watched a movie on TV. He'd asked her a question a couple of minutes ago and as yet Willow had made no attempts to answer him. He'd thought she was asleep at first but her eyes were wide open and pointed at the screen - he was getting a little worried now.

"You okay, honey?" he checked as the young woman finally looked at him.

"Huh?" she said, having not been paying attention at all, "I was watching the movie" she told him, though it wasn't the entire truth. Though she'd appeared to be looking at the TV screen she'd taken in none of the pictures or dialogue for the past half hour at least.

Knowing there was something wrong, Oz flipped off the TV and twisted to face his girlfriend.

"Sweetie, if there's something worrying you, I wish you'd tell me" he said gently and Willow looked down at where her hands were fidgeting in her lap.

"I'm sorry" she said guiltily, "I didn't mean to spoil the movie or our date I just... I can't stop worrying about Buffy" she admitted.

"Did something happen?" Oz checked, "With Buffy, I mean. Is she okay?"

"Well, yes, she's okay, in the medical way and the obvious ways and everything, but she's not actually okay in the okay way" she rambled and Oz blinked strangely as he tried to untangle her mixed up sentence in his head.

"I'm not explaining this very well" Willow sighed, shaking her head, "It's just, she was always so happy with Angel, and things are just different now"

"Since Spike came along" said Oz, and though Willow did not deny or confirm that statement, he knew it was true.

"I know something happened with them" she told him, "The big 'something'" she said pointedly and Oz nodded that he understood what she meant. He'd suspected things had gone way further with Buffy and Spike than they perhaps should've, there was just no way his friend would be in such a mess over the boss-lady if their relationship hadn't gone to a whole new level before it crashed and burned.

"After that I thought she was going to end things with Angel and choose Spike" Willow continued, "And I wasn't sure whether it was a good or bad thing, I mean, I didn't know Spike too well and Buffy and Angel had been together so long... Then she stayed with him and now Spike's all kinda broken, isn't he?"

"He's not himself" Oz agreed, "There's deep pain and stuff but Spike's not a big talker about feelings"

"Neither is Buffy lately" Willow sighed, "And I want to be there for her, be a good friend and act all supportive but I just keep thinking she might've made the wrong decision"

"That's not for us to say, honey" her boyfriend told her and she nodded that she already knew that.

"I wish it was" she said sadly, "I hate to see people I care about hurting so much. Buffy's been one of my best friends for years and now I know she's in a bad place and I just don't know how to help her out"

"All we can do is be there for the two of them if they want us to be" Oz shrugged, "I'm sorry it's not easier than that, sweetie, but we can't fix the world and make it all a fairytale" he told her, putting a hand to her face, "If we could, I would, for you"

"You already do" Willow managed a smile as she looked at him, "I kinda feel like the princess in the fairytale when I'm with you" she said, blushing because she couldn't believe she was saying this stuff out loud, "I didn't think a guy like you would ever want to go out with me but it's kinda like a fairytale that you like me so much"

"Who couldn't like you?" Oz smiled as he leaned in close and kissed her lips.

It may have only a month since they first met but already Oz knew he was falling head over heels in love with Willow Rosenburg. He hadn't really believed in love at first sight til he met her, but now he believed anything was possible, even maybe Buffy and Spike finding happiness one day.

"I am sorry about this, Buffy, really I am" Angel apologised as he threw the last few things in his suitcase and started to fasten it shut.

"It's okay, no big" she forced a smile, though she was crying a river inside. She'd been hoping every day for almost a month now that with a little effort she and Angel could make things good like they used to be. She accepted it when he said he hadn't cheated with Darla, and kept her own one day affair with Spike a secret. Things should've been okay by now, but they weren't.

"If I had a choice, I wouldn't be leaving like this but..." Angel began but Buffy cut him off.

"I know, it's okay, your job has to come first" she said, forcing back tears. Of course, her boyfriend assumed she was upset to see him go, he had no idea her problem was more so that she didn't care he was leaving for a while.

Buffy wanted to care about Angel, wanted to love him, wanted to want him at least, but she couldn't anymore, she didn't have it in her. Spike had taken over her mind first and then slowly crept into her heart. She hated him for it, but a part of her loved him just a little bit too and there was simply nothing she could do to stop it.

She tried to be Spike's friend, but they both found that pretty much impossible. They fought like cat and dog, much like they had when she first took over the Bronze, but sometimes their eyes would meet and behind all the pain and venom they both knew there was something else still there, something deep and meaningful and that was getting harder to deny every day.

"Buffy?" Angel was standing right in front of her and the blonde hadn't even noticed til his hand landed on her shoulder and he called her name again.

"I'm sorry, what?" she said, glancing up at him.

"Are you okay, sweetheart?" he checked, looking so genuinely concerned that Buffy felt terribly guilty for not paying more attention to him.

"I'm fine" she said softly, her voice not coming out quite right, "Did you ask me something before?" she checked, vaguely recalling there being a question.

"I was just wondering if maybe you'd be taking Willow to LA next Friday now that I can't go?" he asked her, "You could make a girls weekend out of it, go shopping and everything. Y'know I think you could use the R & R" he told her, kissing her forehead.

"Maybe" Buffy nodded in agreement as Angel disappeared off to the the room to get the rest of his things together.

The trip to LA had quite escaped Buffy's mind til just now. Her father had sent her the invitation to a very high class evening at the Hyperion Hotel. Anybody who was anybody in local business circles would be there and given that she was Hank Summers daughter and now owned the Bronze Buffy was eligible to attend. She and Angel had planned to make a weekend of it, staying at the Hyperion Friday and Saturday, the night of the event, before travelling back late on Sunday.

Of course now Angel would be otherwhere with his own important business colleagues from Wolfram & Hart, no doubt including Miss Darla MacKenzie who seemed so determined to get her claws into Angel, and who may already have had some fun with him.

Buffy wished she could feel hurt by that, or angry about it, but she couldn't. She'd cheated too, and she couldn't bear to tell Angel that. If they split up she'd be left alone with only Spike to turn to. She'd have to admit what she might feel for him, and things would happen that shouldn't. He wasn't her equal, and yet he had some kind of power over her. Buffy was too afraid of what she felt, as well as what Spike might feel, to let anything more happen between them, even if that meant being permanately miserable as an alternative.

Spike shut the front doors to the Bronze with a bang and locked them up tight. Another night was over, another night of seeing happy couples laughing and kissing and having a good time, celebrating anniversaries, enjoying first dates, and being so sickeningly in love.

Swinging back behind the bar, Spike helped himself to a large bourbon and drank it down in one. The alcohol burned his throat, but ultimately did little dull the pain he felt inside.

Buffy Summers. God he'd hated her when she'd first shown up and announced she was taking over the Bronze. He'd hated how she assumed they'd just take orders from her because Daddy bought her a new doll-house to play with. He was nobody's puppet and yet he'd ended up dancing to her tune.

He loved her, it was as simple and as painfully tragic as that. William 'Spike' Blackstone had fallen in love for just the second time in his life and it had brought him even more pain than the first time, despite the fact his 'romantic relationship' with Buffy had actually consisted of a couple of kisses and one incredible shag on her desk.

Over the past month, Spike had felt very much like he was on a merry-go-round. One day he'd blame Buffy for how bad he felt, for making him fall in love with her then backing off like she had. Some days he'd blame himself for letting himself love to easily like he'd always promised himself he never would again. Other days it was Angel's fault for not being a good enough man for Buffy and causing her to want to stray, and sometimes when he was drunk and out of sensible options Spike would blame Doyle or Faith or anybody who got in his way for just how wretched he felt.

"Gotta get over this!" he told himself sternly as he gulped down another drink and then set about cleaning up the bar for the night. Still, Spike knew no matter how many drinks he got through, how many pain filled songs he wrote, or how many girls he bedded, nothing was going to help him get over Buffy. He was in love with a woman who could never love him back - he was doomed.

To Be Continued...