- God, Interrupted, Chapter 11

Lee had changed in the past few days, Kara noticed. He spent more time alone now. Several mornings she had woken up to find him gone. Sometimes she sent Helo after him, sometimes she went herself, but mostly she just let him be.

Today, she decided to go after him.

She found him where Helo had found him the first time he'd disappeared: Sitting on the ridge overlooking the high school. He didn't acknowledge her when she sat down beside him, he just continued to stare off into the distance.

She studied his face. It was slightly thinner, making his cheekbones more defined. His skin was slightly paler, which accentuated the dark circles under his eyes. His eyes, however, were still that fierce, radiant blue that was his alone.

She bumped his shoulder with her own, bringing him back to the here and now.

"Hey." She said. "A cubit for your thoughts."

He turned to her almost violently. "What did you say?" He asked in a low growl.

She shrunk back from him involuntarily, then straightened up again. "I was just wondering what you were thinking about." She said.

"Nothing." He said, turning away from her again.

'Sure.' She mouthed. She opened her mouth again to actually speak this time, but immediately shut it with and audible click. She was about to ask him for the hundredth time if he was all right but thought better of it. He didn't seem like he was in the mood to be mothered.

"You come up here a lot." She said instead.

"It's a good place to think."

"About nothing?" She quipped.

He stared blankly at her, obviously not getting the joke. She shook her head, a little confused. Old Lee would have either laughed at her lame joke or blushed bright red that she had caught him in a lie. New Lee seemed to have too much on his mind for friendly banter. Still, she was determined to try again.

"Your hair's getting long." She said as she ran her fingers through the curls that brushed the collar of his jacket. "I guess the barber was closed."

He sighed and turned his head so her fingers brushed across the thick stubble on his face. "Yeah," he chuckled. "I guess so." He took her hand in his and kissed its palm.

She relaxed at his tenderness. "Why don't you come get some breakfast." She rose to her feet, hoping he would follow suit, but he stayed where he was.

"I think I figured out a way into the air base." He said softly.

She turned slowly on her heels. "Lee, you've seen all the recon material." She warned. "You know how heavily guarded it is. We can't go in there with only twenty-six people, it would be suicide."

"We're dying here anyway." His look was pleading.

"But the longer we stay alive, the better chance we have."

"A better chance for what, Kara?" He said, jumping to his feet and waving his hand at the horizon. "To live in a nuclear waste land? To spend every day running from machines that are trying to kill us?"

She squared her shoulders in defiance.

"We go out every day and raid small Cylon outposts for weapons, ammo and supplies." He continued. "But for what? Do we think we're going to outlast the Cylons? Or kill them off? They don't die….did you know that?" He didn't give her a chance to respond. "Or do you think we'll scare them away and Caprica will be ours again?"

She hated to admit it, but he had a point. She knew the only plans Sam and his resistance had were to fight the Cylons. Her shoulders slumped with resignation.

"Caprica's not our home anymore, Galactica is." He said. "And since they're not coming for us, we have to get ourselves to them."

"So what's the plan?" She asked.

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"We've got about a quarter click of open field to cross before we get down here." Lee said as he pointed to a map, indicating an area in front of the main gate to the base with a small guard house that was known to be unused. Kara, Helo and Sam looked on.

"There's very little cover," Lee continued, "so we've gotta move quickly." He moved his hand across the map. "We'll set up two sections of light machine guns at either end here. They'll give us covering fire. We'll have a small team of about five people come in from the east that should cause a distraction. We'll have another team of five in reserve but we probably won't need them."

Lee looked at each of them individually. "The point is, we have to move in there fast. Get in there before they can bring mortars and artillery down on us. Once we're in there, we knock out the base's dradis and short range weapons, secure a ship and haul ass out of here."

"How many people will we need?" Sam asked.

Kara locked eyes with Lee. "Everyone goes." She said as if reading his mind. "Once we have the ship and we're off the ground, there's no coming back." She took a deep breath. "It's a good plan, Lee. We can work out the details, teach it to the others and start training in a couple of days."

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Details. He took a walk to try to work some of those out so he could run them past Kara.

"People are going to die." Six said, moving up next to him.

"People die in war." Lee replied. "That was the whole point of the one you started, wasn't it?"

She smiled, refusing to take his bait. "Your little girlfriend might be one of them."

Lee stopped in his tracks, his heart leaping into his throat.

They told all new recruits on their first day of boot camp that it was their job to fight and die for the colonies. At that time there had been forty years of peace and nobody believed they would ever have to fight. Yet here they were. And now there was the possibility of the woman he loved dying as the result of an op he planned. It didn't sit well with him. But it was their job, and he going to have to get used to it.

Lee's eyes searched Six's face, trying to find the truth or the lie in what she had just said, as if she might actually know Kara's fate. Finding neither, he started to walk again. He swallowed hard to clear the lump in his throat.

"People die in war." He repeated.