Hello! Sorry it took me a while to update... I hope you likethis chapthough! Please tell me on your reviews if it's possible what parts you thought hilarious and what parts you didn't like and why! Thanks for your time and reviews!

Oh almost forgot!
...I still don't own Harry Potter...

Total Disaster

"Sirius?" Sirius felt a whisper tickle his left ear in the middle of darkness. "Sirius wake up"

"WHAT?" Sirius said loudly and confused.

"Shhh, you'll wake everyone up!" Someone whispered again as Sirius groaned and turned over his side trying to sleep, he must be crazy, hearing whispers in the middle of the night.

"Sirius, come on I need to show you something" The whisper insisted but this time he felt two hands on the side of his back shaking him awake. "I have a great idea"

"Oh shit now I can't even sleep like normal people" Sirius said.

"You idiot! It's me, James" James whispered.

"Do I know you?"

"Hey guys, what are you up to?" Came a second sleepy whisper, Remus' whisper, Sirius mumbled something about interrupting an exotic dream.

"I have an idea for our prank, but Mr. Black here, is too busy dreaming his usual sick fantasies to listen" James hissed angrily over Peter's loud snores.

"Alright, alright, I'm awake" Sirius said reluctantly giving up.

"What's your idea James?" Remus asked barely above a whisper closing hangings around them as the three boys sat down on Sirius comfortable 4 poster bed.

"Do you remember on our Hogwarts list where it said something like: Please mark your school uniform with name tags?" James asked as he could make out Remus' and Sirius' heads nodding in the dark. "What do you think that is for?"

"To prevent our school uniform to get lost when the house-elves wash them of course." Remus answered

"Exactly" James said as a smirk in Sirius' lips formed getting James' idea.
"And I think I know where the house-elves keep our uniforms safe and sound, washed, just ready to be used the next morning." James said maliciously with a smirk too.

Ta ta ta tam! Ta...Ta Ta..Tammm

Next morning…

"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaghhhhhh! What on earth is this doing in my trunk?" Shouted Frank Longbottom alarmed holding with the tip of his fingers a white bra, waking Remus up with a start making him fall down from his bed. Sirius and James who were already dressed in their school robes were laughing uncontrollably, Remus looked around, his jaw fell open as he noticed the panicking boys looking for their clothes and the mess they had made around the room, Peter was looking rather confused.

"´Morning!" Sirius said to him very entertained.

"Y- you… You didn't do underwear too did you?" Remus asked in a quivery tone.

"'Course mate! Don't you see it all around the floor? Did you think we were gonna miss the best part?" Sirius said laughing, Remus was about to faint as he saw all the boys digging in their trunks looking for their school uniform, they were really in panic but not as much as Remus, they would be in so much trouble now, he stared at James anxiously.

"Don't look at me like that! The underwear part was Sirius' idea!" James said quickly still laughing at Frank's shocked face.

"Hey this is not my robe!"

"This isn't mine!"

"My shirts?"

"My socks?"

"This shirt is much too big!"

"What the hell is this?" One of the boys shouted holding a purple snicker.

"This is a Slytherin tie!"

They had no choice, the boys started to dress themselves into Slytherin ties, use pink towels, some of them snickers, gigantic shirts and tiny robes to go out and see what was going on with their clothes.

"Where is my teddy bear!" Peter shouted on the verge of tears as he looked around his bed, Sirius held it out to him with the tip of his fingers rolling his eyes as Peter took it and hugged it.

"HEY ALICE REDMOND IS COMING RIGHT UP TO OUR DORMITORY I TRIED TO STOP HER BUT SHE KEEPS ON SHOUTING ABOUT NOT FINDING HER UNDERWEAR!"

"Oh shit!" "Frank Longbottom said throwing out every piece of girls clothing he could find in his trunk around the room as quickly as possible, but it was too late.

"FRANK FERDINAND LONGBOTTOM! WHAT ON EARTH ARE YOU DOING HOLDING MY UNDERWEAR!" A furious Alice Redmond shouted through the door as she slammed it close behind her and marched towards him.

"What? I.. Alice.. Sorry, I didn't…It wasn't me, you know I wouldn't!"

"You… SICK!" Alice shouted as she punched him really hard on the face making him fall to the floor.

"Ooh, that's gotta hurt" Sirius said meanwhile more and more girls came in the dormitory complaining.

"This is what I call a total disaster!" James said very entertained as a 6th year Gryffindor prefect entered the room, he was wearing a very small robe for him, his blonde hair was very messy and one of his green eyes was purple as if someone had just punched him, it was kind of weird to see a prefect in such a mess, specially wearing the badge.

"PLEASE CALM DOWN!" He made himself heard, but everyone kept fighting and throwing clothes around the room.

"We have to untidy ourselves or we'll be suspects" James said as him Peter and Sirius messed their hair a bit, took off their Gryffindor tie and unbuttoned the first buttons of their shirt, Remus just sat there with his mouth slightly opened on the floor, still wearing his blue pyjamas, in trance.

"Come on Remus!" Sirius said dragging Remus with James and Peter out of the common room, outside the situation didn't get better, it was if possible worse, they saw Lily run to them, she was wearing her normal school robes and her Gryffindor tie as she normally would.

"Hi James, Sirius, Peter, Rem, do you have any idea of what is going on?"

"Err" Said Remus but Sirius Interrupted.

"Nope"

"We know nothing, you?" James asked.

"No though it's weird because I'm the only one who woke up and had the correct clothes inside the trunk" Lily answered, Sirius glared at James.

"Oh… Yeah.. Weird…" Was all James could say.

"See you around Lily" Sirius said at last dragging both Remus who was still in trance and James, Peter followed outside.

"Sirius I didn't do it with Lily's clo-"

"Don't" Sirius said "I got the concept"

Professor McGonnagal appeared with a purple robe with huge white stars, anyone could tell the robe was Dumbledore's she was sending all the students down to the Great Hall.

"SILENCE!" She shouted as everyone nearby fighting fell silent "I want you, ALL of you to go to the Great Hall immediately! Who ever was responsible for this should be ashamed of such behaviour, all of you wait down in the hall I'm sure professor Dumbledore is already there and has got something to say about all this!" She said furiously as she guided all of the Gryffindors downstairs, James and Sirius tried to sneak away dragging Remus and Peter with them, Lily got James' eye as he winked at her, she could swear by the look of the faces of the four boys it had been them who had caused this, she smiled in response, the four turned around slowly and carefully started to walk towards the opposite corridor.

"POTTER, BLACK, LUPIN AND PETTIGREW!" McGonnagal shouted once more the boys froze dead in their tracks, all the messy Gryffindors were looking at them over their shoulders.

The four boy had no choice but to go down with the rest, McGonnagal was off to find Dumbledore.

"Where you guys the ones who-" Lily whispered, James nodded, Lily smiled. "Awesome" She said.

Once inside in the Great Hall things just didn't get any better.

The tables had food and they were all ready for everyone to have breakfast, but everyone was too busy fighting now that the four houses were in the hall to eat, and Dumbledore still hadn't arrived to put order.

"YOU LITTLE CHEATER!" Jess suddenly came screaming to Sirius after some minutes.

"Oh please kill me now James just kill me" Sirius said.

"You are going down, Lily told me everything! You!" Jess said throwing him some ice cream from the Hufflepuff table landed straight into Sirius's face "Good for nothing!" She said throwing some more ice cream to him "Idiot! Where are my clothes?"

"No, Jess wait!" Lily said from behind.

"How, why did you tell? Lily I thought I could trust you!" James said to Lily. "You were supposed to keep the secret"

"James I'm sorry I didn't know.. It slipped from my lips I, Jess asked me if I knew who had changed the robes nametags and I-"

"Oh it slipped from your lips, that's one I've never heard of" James said sarcastically, Lily looked at him with tears in her emerald eyes, they looked at each other without saying a word.

"James help!" Sirius shouted running around the Gryffindor table for his life with Jess behind him with a jar full of pumpkin juice, she threw it including the jar to Sirius who ducked, missed and hit Remus instead, he gasped, he was completely wet with sticky pumpkin juice, Jess ran to him shocked, Remus sat on one of the table seats stunned with his mouth slightly opened, Peter and Sirius were laughing their lungs out.

"Lupin! Oh God are you alright? I'm so sorry, did I hurt you?" She said kneeling slightly to be at level with his face making the jar disappear with a wave of her wand and conjured a towel for him, she was panting since she had run quite a bit to catch Sirius. Remus just looked at her curly red hair and pretty hazel eyes behind her pair of delicate glasses and thought for a few seconds before he said:

"Don't worry, I deserved it, I contributed with the close prank…I think yours is in our dormitory" Remus said softly, Jess jaw fell open.

"You…. YOU HELPED HIM I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU!" She said furiously as she threw the towel with all her might to Remus' face which made him fall from the table to the floor.

"This is insane" Sirius said tears of laughter slipping from his grey eyes looking around.

"Even the teachers are fighting look!" Peter said pointing towards their defence against the dark arts teacher professor Gray who was wearing what looked like a woman's tight grey robe and professor Vane who was still in her dress gown. Professor Gray had just taken out his wand and pointed it straight to professor Vane's forehead, she laughed.

"What are you doing? You just have to give me my robes back, anyway you wouldn't dare touch me with that wand" She said the last part barely above a whisper to him.

"Oh yes I would" He said brushing away the black strands of hair from her violet eyes.

"No you won't"

"Leave her alone!" Snape said as he came running towards them out of no where.

"And you are?" Was professor Gray's reply looking at Snape with his left eyebrow raised. "Ugh you just go away Mr. Snape or it will be 100 points from Slytherin.

"Where did Snape come from?" Sirius laughed even harder.

"Now it's you turn!" Jess shouted from Sirius's back and threw him all the apple sauce in a huge container on his head, Sirius stopped laughing abruptly.

"You- You are going down!" Sirius said taking the first thing he saw on the table to throw at her.

"No!" Remus shouted as Sirius threw the freezing water to her and launched himself along with Jess to the floor, so Sirius missed and the water hit the back of a girl with long straight light brown hair. Annabelle's.

Sirius gasped when he realised who he had hit. "Holly shit" He whispered as Annabelle who was fighting with Nott from Slytherin slowly turned around and her scary blue eyes met with Sirius' fearful grey ones for a tiny second in slow motion for Sirius her hair stuck to her cheeks that were pink with fury, she held her wand steady to him and shouted:

"Eatslugs Black!"

The spell hit Sirius and he began to vomit slimy slugs all over the place.

"I hate you" She said and turned around again but Nott had gone cowardly out of sight, afraid she might hex him too.

Many people had told Sirius he was hated, his parents, his brother, some of his cousins, and uncles, he didn't care actually as long as James was his friend, but the three words coming from Annabelle, they sounded more cruel than they seem… Those were the most painful word he had heard in all his life, even counting all the insults he had received from his own family. Could it get any worse? He thought as he burped.

"SILENCE!" Dumbledore shouted from the staff table, all the racket in the great hall stopped abruptly at his roar, everyone stared at his blue eyes fearfully, Dumbledore looked back at each one of the students and professors.

Alice Longbottom was holding onto Frank Longbottom's collar. Crabbe and Goyle were on the floor. Snape was holding hard onto professor Gray's wrist as if to stop him from pointing his wand to professor Vane. Jess was sitting on top of Remus' back when they both fell to the floor, Remus didn't dare look at Dumbledore. Lily was on the verge of tears. Annabelle had just sneezed, she was very wet though she still looked intently back at Dumbledore. Sirius was trying to control his burps. Peter was staring at James who didn't take his eyes off Lily. Dumbledore looked almost as if he might smile, but he didn't, instead he said:

"I've talked to the house-elves" His voice almost echoed in the room. "They had nothing to do with this disaster, whoever did this will have points less from their house and a month worth detention, a Slytherin student has just stated to me that the responsible of this had clearly been a girl from Gryffindor that apparently wanted to have some fun and is the only one wearing the correct uniform" Everybody looked at Lucius Malfoy who was standing just beside Dumbledore along with Narcissa Black with a nasty smirk. James, Sirius and Remus exchanged looks of confusion.

"Which I'm quite disappointed to say is Lily Evans"

Everyone started to whisper and made gestures of disagreement in the room even the professors, everyone believed that Lily had shown herself to be a very self centred girl and had gone outstandingly well in her first week of classes, she couldn't possibly have done this much less if it was to have fun. James was about to speak but before he did so Dumbledore spoke again.

"Is this true miss Evans?" Dumbledore asked every eye was looking at Lily, as a tear from her eyes slipped and fell to her feet, she looked at James' hazel eyes biting her lip, maybe if she told Dumbledore it had been her James would forgive her for telling he had done the prank to Jess.

"Yes it's true"

"What are you talking about Lily? Of course it wasn't you!" Jess said standing up from Remus' back.

"She's lying professor! It was me!" James said walking in front of Lily hiding her from Dumbledore's sight as if protecting her.

"And me" Sirius said taking out some slugs out of his mouth, people looking at his with disgust as he stepped past Lily to James' right.

"And me professor" Remus said standing up beside James' left.

"I helped professor" Lily said.

"No you didn't!" The three boys snapped at her in unison.

"Very well, in consequence of today's facts, classes would be cancelled for today meanwhile your belongings are again in place, you may go" Dumbledore said as the hall exploded with cheers and went out to play in the grounds and some went back upstairs.

"As for you four… Minerva would take care of you" Dumbledore said as he left them with McGonnagal looking very stern. Lily, James, Remus and Sirius gulped.

An our later outside by the lake:

"Well it wasn't so bad, we have detention for only a month and they took only 200 points from Gryffindor" Remus said.

"And you consider that's good?" Sirius said throwing a stone to the lake trying for it to jump, but the stones sank over and over again without even lasting 2 jumps.

"No" Remus answered. "But it could have been worse"

"Yeah I thought it would be worse too" Lily said.

"Why did you say it had been you in there?" James asked at last he hadn't spoken since they got out of the castle.

"I just wanted you to forgive me, I thought that maybe if I did that you would. You know I'm sorry"

"Ok, I forgive you" James said, Lily smiled to him as her emerald eyes shone again.

"Lily!" Jess shouted running towards them.

"Oh God please tell me what have I done to deserve this" Sirius said looking up at the clear blue sky.

"Why did you say it was you? You are so stupid Lily!" Jess said sitting by her, Lily said nothing she just smiled. "And… Oh please could any of you tell me were on earth are my robes please? I can't stand this clothes anymore" She said looking at the boys.

"Don't look at me, I hardly know where my head is" Peter said.

"You Lupin, please tell me… Please, please, please?"

"You must be mad if you think Remus is willing to tell you were your robes are after what you did to him in the great hall, Aren't I right Remus?" Sirius asked maliciously climbing to the top of a tree nearby.

"It's in our dormitory" Was all Remus said as Sirius fell to the ground painfully.

"Thanks" Jess said to Remus smiling. "you are not like…. Other people" She said glaring at Sirius.

"That hurt" James sniggered.

"Well you can't enter anyway, you don't know the Gryffindor password" Sirius said, Jess looked at Remus again but she didn't even need to ask for it Remus answered before she even opened her mouth.

"The password's Wicked"

"Thanks Remus, but I don't know the way to-"

"North tower. Last floor. Right corridor in a portrait of a fat lady" Remus said smiling.

"Thanks!" Jess beamed as she skipped her way to the castle.

"Traitor!" Sirius shouted to Remus hitting him with a small stone on his forehead.

"Sorry, it's the least I could do after making all this mess"

"Yeah, whatever!" James mocked on.

"Excuses won't work with us you know? You are still a traitor!" Sirius said, Remus looked at them anxiously, neither James or Sirius could help smiling at their worried friend.

"I'm no traitor! You know I'm your friend 'till the end" Remus said, Lily laughed.

Back at the Gryffindor house in the boys dormitory which was still in a mess by the way, Jess was looking everywhere for her clothes, but she found something else instead under Remus' bed very well hidden. Jess was very curious so she struggled under the four poster bed and reached for a shallow stone basin an brought it out in front of her.

Jess looked at it, it had odd carvings around the edge, runes an symbols she didn't recognize. A silvery light was coming from the basin's contents, Jess didn't know if it was liquid or gas.

She didn't know it was Remus' pensive.