Cut to Kitty and Wanda in human form just for this little part, standing in the hair care isle in 'Boots'
"How do you think Kurt would look in a salmon pink Wanda?" Kitty asked picking up and bottle of die.
"Personally i think that hot pink would suit him better." Wanda passed her another bottle.
"Maybe...what about purple? I think it would really set off his eyes!"
Wanda thought about it. "Maybe a lime green"
"Like, perfect!"
Back to wherever this shitty parody is being shot
"Vas i remember." He nodded.
"Action!"
Kitty and Lance are lying on their backs, watching the clouds and giggling.
"See that? See that? Look at that! It's really pretty...not as pretty as you though Kitty!" Lance smiled."That wasn't in the script!" Rahne muttered looking the her script. "Ah it works." She shrugged and carried on watching.
Kitty blushed then carried on.
"What? Oh yeah! Um-- look... there's one that looks like a baby rabbit. See the fluffy tail?" She moved closer to Lance slyly.
"Yeah... hey! There's one that looks like two lions killing each other for a scrap of meat"
Lance laughs; this isn't Kitty's cup of tea, and she grimaces. Lance doesn't notice and carrys on.
"Ah, I've never played this before"
"Really? My father..." She shuddered."-and I used to do this all the time. He says all the great Kings of the past are up there"
"You think Magnetos is up there?" Lance looked at one star.
"Nah
he's at the ice cream shop still(1)...I mean...i'll just look uncomfy
and nervouse": Kitty looks uncomfy and nervouse at the question.
They look at each other; Lance gets up and moves off.
"He wasn't my father, but he was still.." He sighs gently. "...part of me."
"My
father(insert shudder) said there was a...a darkness in Magneto that he
couldn't escape..." Kitty looks at Lance with a heart-felt gaze.
"Maybe there's a darkness in me too."
"Jeez not this crap again!"(2) Kitty mutters before she puts her paw on Lance's, and they nuzzle.
We see Scott watching from a hill some distance away. He addresses the sky.
"Father... I am lost. Lance is one of them. Mangeto's heir. How can I accept him?"
"Talking to yourself is the first sign of insanity.." Wanda hisses to Rogue off stage. "Belive me i know insanity."
"I think its symoblic or something...like a refrence to something or other." Rogue mutters back unsure.
Jean approches from behind Scott.
"Scott?"
"I was... seeking counsel from the Great Kings."
"I see dead people..." Orginal human Jamie says in a eary voice off stage.
"Did they help?" Jean asks shooting an annoyed glance at Jamie.
"Jean encourging him won't help!" Jubilee giggled.
"Silent as stars." He said threw gritted teeth. "My father would never--"
"Oh, Scott... you want so much to walk the path expected of you. Perhaps Lance does not."
"Thanks Red!" Lance shouts from off stage.
"Shut up you no good hood!" Jean yells back.
"Hey like, don't call him that Jean you little hussie! What was with
you and Duncan! You were just using him to make Scott jelouse, then you
ignored him because he finally gave up on you and went for Tyren!"(3)
Kitty stomped on stage and glaring at Jean bearing teeth in a
frightning way.
"Thankyou!" Tyren gasps. "I'm so fed up of being hated and bashed-"
"Shut up!" Kitty pointed at her. "I still don't like you!"
"Meep!" She put her paws over her mouth.
"Anyway!" She turned back to Jean. "Don't say that about my boyfriend
or i'll phase out your heart and show it to you while it's still
beating!" She stomped off stage not noticing how everyone but Wanda
took one step away from her.
"Erm well...carry on people.." Rahne said nervously.
Scott nodded. "What? How do you know what--"
"I can see them down there just as easily as you can. Get to know them and see." Jean chuckles.
She turns and walks off; after a moment of hesitation, Scott follows. We move back down to Kitty and Lance. She is nuzzling him, but he pulls away clearing his throat.
"What's wrong?" Kitty asked cocking her head to one side.
"Nothing.."
"Lance.." Kitty said in that way only us girls can do, y'know the way
that even just one word can strike fear in guys hearts. I love being a
girl! Anyway...
"It's just that... my whole life I've been trained to..." He stops. "Nothing. I gotta go." He turns and walks off.
"Lance-- wait."
Lance pauses a moment, and looks back at Kitty's face, staring
back at him; he looks away and moves to continue, but is stopped by
Kurt's finger pointing up from the grass.
"Yes another line!" He mutters. "And where are you going?"
"Nuhh... nowhere?" Lance says as he struggles not to laugh.
"That's what you think!" He exclaimes springing up.
Kurt slips under Lance and vanishes in the grass.
"Who was that?" Lance asks confused.
"Uh..." She giggles amused and slightly apologetic. "Friend of the family."
Lance looks back and finds Kurt lying on his back. Kurt slips off and
darts away, tugging Lance's tail and laughing as Lance chants 'i will
not kill Kittys best friend' over and over.
"Come on! You follow.." Kurt shudders. "Now i know how Forge felt after
Kitty and the Rocktumbler...(4)" He goes back into charecter. "Old
Kurt he knows the way!"
"The way where?" Lance asks hesitating.
"You follow-- you'll see! Hurry now!" Kurt starts bounding around doing lots of tricks.
"Lance, c'mon!" Kitty giggles while following Kurt.
The 'lions' run after Kurt, who is swinging Tarzan-like from tree to tree and laughing eerily.
"Where's he taking us?" Lance asks Kitty who shruggs out of breath
Kurt lowers himself from above their heads
"To a special place in your heart... called Upendi!"
He pushes their muzzles together. As he narrates the song, Jamie monkeys of various types dance to illustrate it. Hundreds of Jamie animals of all kinds surround them, sweeping the lions up in the spirit. The scene takes on the appearance of a Tunnel of Love, with the two lions being swept down a jungle stream with the matchmaking Kurt orchestrating the atmosphere. Also even though it was clearly night now it's sun set! The wonders of song!
KURT:There's a place where the crazy moon
Makes the monkeys sing and the baboons swoon
And the sultry scent of the lotus bloom
Will carry you away
Where the hippos swing from the jungle vines
And the rhino rhumba in a conga line
And the pink flamingoes are intertwined
As the stars come out to play
In Upendi
Where the passionfruit grows sweet
And it's so divine
That you lose your mind
As it sweeps you off your feet
In Upendi
Without a worry or a care
It just takes two
To make it true
Your heart will lead you there
KITTY:Where is it?
KURT:No place you don't take with you...
You better watch your step 'cause the path is steep
Better hold your breath cause the water's deep
It's a long way down over Lovers' Leap
But falling's half the fun!
In Upendi
Where the passionfruit grows sweet
And it's so divine
That you lose your mind
As it sweeps you off your feet
In Upendi
Without a worry or a care
It just takes two
To make it true
Your heart will take you there
You can beat the bush like there's no tomorrow
From Tanganyika to Kilimanjaro
But you'll find Upendi wherever you are
Oh underneath the sun
KITTY:Upendi-- it means "love", doesn't it?
KURT:Welcome to Upendi!
KURT and JAMINALS:In Upendi
(Though one Jamie monkey is heard singing 'In your panties' then getting pulled of by Rahne and scolded)
Where the passionfruit grows sweet
And it's so divine
That you lose your mind
As it sweeps you off your feet
KURT and KITTY:In Upendi
Without a worry or a care
It just takes two
To make it true
Your heart will take you there
KITTY:Upendi!
KURT and KITTY and JAMINALS:Down In Upendi
Way down
In Upendi!
The last few lines repeat and fade away. The song ends with Kitty and Lance still singing the words "In Upendi". They are alone out on the savannah again where it is once again night.
"Good night..." Lance smiles at Kitty.
"Good night..." She says back even though they both clearly don't want to say Good night.
Kitty walks off to the main cavern, and Lance goes back to his standing stone on the promontory; Scott appears in the direction Kitty is walking, and he approaches Lance.
"It's... kinda cold tonight, huh? Come on."
Wanda watches from a distance as the two lions make their way back into the cavern.
"Get him! What are you waiting for? Lance, get him!" She says hushed, to herself.
She lies down and stares with despair as she realizes Lance is not going to attack Scott. She hisses and jumps up, rushing back to report to Mystique. Scene changes back to Mystiques's location.
"You're sure?" Mystique snarls.
"Affirmative. I saw it with my own eyes." Wanda nodded respectfully then muttered about killing Mystique.
"Lance cannot betray us!" Mystique roars ignoring Wandas threats.
"CUT!" Rahne grins. "Ah I smell the smell of nearly-finished-Shitty-Parody! Then i will be FREE! And so will all of you!"
The whole cast cheers. "Only 3 more Chapters left!"
1---->In...chapter 5 i think, Magneto and Sabertooth left for ice-cream.
2---->In most-if not all-Lancitty fics Lance thinks he's not good
enough for Kitty and this results in a) a fight b) a break up or
c)almost break up but in the end get stronger because Kitty disagrees
and normally it comes out that she loves him or something.
3---->Why does no one else see this? Everyone is all 'ewwww bad
Tyren stealing Scott' but she didnt steal him from Jean because Jean
was with Duncan! YES IT'S TRUE I AM A TYREN FAN!dodges things random
readers throw at meYou know you were all thinking it!
4---->possibly my favourite x-men evo parody of all time, Kitty and
the Rocktumbler, Written by one of the best fanfiction writers i have
ever seen toddfan. Forge is Kittys 'old' dad. He frequently complains
about it.