A/N: Thanks for all the great feedback! Today's show made this part kind of tough to do because it was a harsh reminder that Patrick on the show has not evolved as much as Patrick in this story. Robin, too, for that matter. They're still so judgmental and impatient with each other. Thank goodness for fanfic.

Naughty rating.

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Meddling – Patrick 12
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"If you need to be sad about it, that's okay."

Despite look of adoration in Robin's eyes, I have not suddenly become Mr. Compassionate Boyfriend. I'm simply smart enough to have figured out what she needed to hear; my reward is the softening of her eyes and the easing of the tension in her compact body as she settles into me. I know I'm going to get a kiss soon. Maybe even get to cop a feel before she remembers we're at work.

It's a much better result than, say, if I came right out and said that the hitman is not worth her pain. I do that and she bottles it all up and I spend the start of our vacation trying to break through that wall of hers, getting frustrated and annoyed in the process. We have some new routines I prefer. Like the one I'm going for now.

The one where we'll kiss, I'll cop a feel, she'll get all proper because we're at work. She'll be flustered and trying to pretend she didn't enjoy it. I'll smirk and make some cocky statement that irritates her. She'll snap at me. I'll smirk again and try to steal another kiss. There'll be some token resistance before she gives in just enough to drive me wild and then push me away with a smug grin. She's happy. I'm happy.

It works for us.

"Hey, I want a package deal. Flowers. Patrick Porn. And you. Your heart." With those soulful words, she leans in and we sink into the anticipated kiss. I run my hands up her back and pull her into me until I feel her small, firm breasts lift and press against my chest. Mmmmm, she tastes so good, despite the salt of the tears she wasted on that jerk.

Okay, I can't let this go. I really don't get it. She and Jason broke up eight friggin' years ago and the guy is not only a thug, he's a brain-damaged asshole who cheated on her and still treats her like dirt! Five minutes after saving his life I wanted to punch him for how he made her feel. It frustrated the crap out of me how she just used to stand there and take it like she was his doormat and then she'd have the nerve to look down her nose at me when I didn't dance in attendance to the local mafia wannabe.

It wasn't a complete loss for me, though, since that was how I eventually figured out she really wasn't in love with Morgan anymore and was digging on me. She doesn't let me get away with anything. I love it that she gets all hot and bothered when I annoy her. Ah hell, I love it when she gets all hot and bothered.

Testing to see how far she'll let me go, I continue to lazily dance my tongue with hers and I glide my hand up her lean body and under her bra to cup her firm breast. I muffle her gasp with my lips and tilt her head back with my other hand as her breast swells and tightens against my palm; as do I against her hip bone.

"Robin," I moan into her mouth. I don't know if I'm begging her to stop me or to let me ravish her right in this chair. It was my plan to drive her wild before our trip, but I'm the one losing control here as she rocks against me, her strong fingers pulling and grabbing at me. All I know is that one of us needs to stop this or we're going to do something totally unprofessional. When she moans again and presses into my hand I know it's not going to be me.

Disjointed thoughts and sensations are rushing through my brain. The softness of her hand. Are the blinds facing the lab closed? The sweetness of her scent. Did I lock the door? The heat pouring off her body burns my fingers, seeps into my body. Do I still have a condom in my wallet? How old is it? Oh my god, that noise she's making. Robin.

I wrap my hands around her waist, but she anticipates me and lifts up so she can slide her legs around my hips and straddles me. My system stutters. With not one iota of finesse I jerk her jacket off her shoulders and drive my hands under her shirt and unclasp her bra. While she's strains into my erection, I shove her shirt and bra up just enough to bare her taut nipples to my greedy mouth. The buttons of her crumpled blouse dig into my forehead as I greedily lave and nip one aureole, then another and back again. She arches into my ministrations with a greedy keen. The heat and wet of her smothers my pulsing arousal, her hands claw at the back of my head, my shoulders.

"Robin. Robin. Robin," I pant.

I push her back to make enough room for my fingers to make contact through her pants with the spot between her legs that elicit the little gasps and squeaks that filled my bedroom that one night and have haunted my days since. I feel her starting to quake on my hand, that's it, just a little more. I am swallowing her sounds with my mouth, urging her on, pushing her over.

RIIIING

"Dammit!"

"Oh my god!" Robin jerks away from me so fast she almost falls on the floor, but I grab her just in time. Despite my utter frustration I can't help but chuckle at the horrified look her face and the picture she makes as she scrambles to pull down her shirt and bra, untangle her legs and grab the phone.

"Damn impressive, Dr. Scorpio," I mutter as she mostly succeeds and answers the phone before it stops ringing.

"Hello? Oh. Um. Oui, Je suis Docteur Scorpio," she greets as she tries to smooth down her hair and figure out why and how her bra is now tangled outside the bottom of her blouse.

As she continues to talk in her unaccented French, I am achingly aware of my unsated need. With a pained sigh I close my eyes and think about the coming baseball season to try and calm my tumescence enough to be able to stand up and lurch out of here.

After a few minutes I stand and bend down, mentally cursing the ache in my balls, and pick Robin's jacket up from the floor and drop it on the chair. I watch her sift through some files on her desk and continue her conversation. She's still mussed from our recent activity, but I have already been dismissed. With another sigh, I lean down and press a kiss to her hair and let myself out.

I guess I'll tell her later that my father got the all clear this morning and I've already helped him settle into Bobbie's brownstone.

In the meantime, I need to do my rounds, meet with Eric to bring him up to speed on the cases he'll be covering for me, hack my way through a mound of paperwork and meet with Porter to see what's going on with her case. I want that woman out of town before Robin and I get back from the Cape.

Then I'm going to go buy another box of condoms. Our vacation starts tonight.