Disclaimer: I and my writing accociates own the characters, but not the world. That belongs to the owners of Angel and Highlander.
As Jim stepped under the arch and into the church, he felt an electric tingle in his skin. Not that this was his first visit in a church since he and religion had parted ways – hell, he had even been to the Vatican, and stood in the Peter's Church – but it was the first time he had come here alone, and with a purpose.
He still felt the aftermath of his talk with Christopher on the Peter's square, discussing faith and God. Some of the things that Christopher had said had struck home, no doubt about it. And Jim had told the man more about himself than most of his friends knew…what was it about him? Maybe it was just that – he seemed to be a man of God, if such a man ever existed. Weather or not he was indeed experiencing what Christopher would call a "spiritual awakening", he needed an outside perspective. Talking to Christopher himself again would not bring him closer. Herbert and Mercedes were too young to understand, Andrew too much of a scientist, and Murph…Murph was NOT an option. Besides, talking to them would mean they would know…he needed the sympathetic ear of a stranger. And if there was anything a priest could do, it was listen.
Looking around in the almost empty church, Jim walked slowly up the center aisle. There were only 2 other people in the pews, both quietly sitting with their heads bowed in prayer. Or sleep, for all he knew.
Locating what he had been seeking, Jim walked along the front bench, and stepped up to the wooden confessional chair. The left side was open, inviting him in. He took a look around, making sure that no one was behind him – and then, he stepped into the dark confessional.
He sat down on the wooden seat, closing the sliding door as he did so. For a moment, there was only quiet darkness, and the smell of incense. Then, a small window with a wire mesh slid open, and a shadow moved on the other side.
Jim cleared his throat. "Bless me, father, for I have sinned. It has been……74 years since my last confession…."
A muffled sound came from the other side of the window.
"Excuse me, my son…what did you say?"
"It is a long story, Father. And it's not really important, but…enough to say that I keep well."
"I see. Well, what IS it that you wish to confess? Hardly the sins of the flesh, I assume, if you are as old as you say?"
"Oh, you have no idea, Father. You see…sins of the flesh is where this all begins…."
Jim lay in his bed, feeling the cold draft from the window on his hot skin only with the edge of his mind. It was a strange half-sleep, where he felt like he was drifting in darkness. Faintly, he heard chimes…incredibly beautiful, sweet…almost overpowering sweet…ringing in the distance.
He tried to roll over and close the window, expecting it to drown out the sound but it did nothing to silent the chimes…in fact, they seemed to be getting louder, stronger…it was like the darkness flowed together and formed new shapes, like his room vanished around him.
Suddenly, in the blink of an eye, everything changed. He was dressed, wearing a turtleneck and jeans. The room he was in – if you could call it a room, it was more of a ruin – had no roof, and above him he saw a sky lit by a sunrise or sunset – it was impossible to tell which.
The walls and floor were made of stone, large and black. He reached out and put his hand on one of them, touching it. It felt cold and solid, and as he pulled his hand back, he noticed little pieces of dirt clinging to his fingertips.
"Is this a dream?" he asked, thinking he only formed the question in his mind, and a little surprised to hear it spoken out loud….but not by his voice. Another voice, a female voice. Behind him!
He spun, and in the other end of the room, lifted a few meters above the floor on what looked like the crumbling remains of a stairway, was a woman. She was backlit from the crimson sky, and for a moment, Jim thought it was Gabriella…but then, he recognized her. The girl from the Vatican. The Dealer's emissary. Rhea.
She smiled, and shook her long black hair. It sparkled in the sunlight.
"It is only a dream, if you think so, Jim."
"What happened?"
"I have come to give you what you have earned, from someone we are both familiar with. Someone who thinks, you…have earned it."
"The Dealer?"
Jim took a step forward, felling for his sword, but not finding it.
"Yes, of course. Come, and let us talk. Time does not last forever, although where we are now, time is not what it used to be."
She turned around, and crawled up the top of the steps. Her backside in the black jumpsuit was displayed for Jim in a second of what he was sure was a calculated move, and then, she was up. She waved at him and jumped down on the other side.
Jim crawled up, finding hand and footholds in the crumbling stone. When he came to the top, he almost gasped. The ruins stretched out for as long as the eye could see, seeming to be in various stages of decay. In some places, walls or remains of towers or turrets still stood, giving the impression of what kind of building would have been there.
"What is this place?" Jim whispered to himself.
"It was once the castle of a great king", Rhea said from an outcropping a few meters away. He jumped, not prepared for her incredible soundless way of moving.
"A king?"
"Yes. But the empire is long gone now, and all that remains of his kingdom is memories." She looked out over the ruins, as if she tried to imagine how they looked in days past. "My name is Ozymandias, king of kings…look upon my works, ye mighty, and despair!"
"That's from a poem."
"Very good, Jim. Yes, from Shelly. Maybe you have some culture in you, somewhere beneath all your layers."
Jim jumped up, so he was level with her. He clung to a piece of rock.
"I don't know what the hell is happening here, but I'd like an explanation. Now, please. The last I remember, I was sleeping in my room. Did you abduct me?"
She smiled coyly. "Could I abduct you out of your own house, do you think? Without your friends hearing? No, you have nothing to fear. This state we are in…it is more than a dream, and more than reality. That's all I can say."
"Then, what is it you wanted to give me?"
She unzipped one of the zippers of her jumpsuit, and pulled out a small envelope.
"Here, Jim. From the Dealer. And I will tell you what it is."
Jim opened the envelope, and saw what was in it.
"Tarot cards? He's pretty one sided, your friend the Dealer!"
"The Dealer speaks in a language that is consistent. That much you have to agree to."
"I suppose. Now, what are these…"
Jim pulled out the first card of the bunch. Rhea, who sat with her legs drawn up under her, spoke in a low, intense voice, underlined by the sound of the wind in the ruins.
"The knight of swords is you, Jim. You are a capable warrior, a worthy opponent. And a lone one."
Jim scoffed. "Thanks, I guess." He turned the next card.
"The four wands are your four friends. It is called Completion. As you see, they form a perfect circle…without you in it."
"So…you're saying that I don't fit in? "
"I'm not telling you anything, Jim…I'm giving you what the card means. But from now on, I don't think I can do even that. Because the last cards are your fortune."
"My future, you mean? The Dealer tells the future from cards?"
"The Dealer uses the cards for many things, Jim. The power behind them is great, and telling the future – or the possible future – is but one of them. Now, look…"
Jim turned the card, and looked.
"The Chariot. A great battle."
"The Magician. Loss…of what, I cannot say."
"The Hermit. Betrayal"
"Death…" she smiled, "But not for you, Jim.
Jim felt his hands shaking, as he drew the final card. Rhea pointed, as if to emphasize her words.
"The Sun. That means life…but once again, not for you."
Jim threw the cards away, and they fluttered to the ground like small leaves.
"What the hell is this all about, anyway? Why do the Dealer bring me here and tell me all this? Is he afraid of me? Because he has every right to be! After what he did, when I get my hands on him, I'll…"
"Jim, you were brought here to get this, nothing more. Well…." She got up, and jumped to the ground in one fluid, catlike motion. Jim jumped after her, not wanting to let her out of his sight. The small room they jumped into was full of shadows, and he more sensed than saw her close to him.
"I guess you could say that I had my own motivations for coming…"
She was suddenly close, very close…he reached out and his hand found her body, and suddenly, without knowing why, he pulled her in close to him. She made a gasping sound that was more the impact of his body against hers than surprise, and then, their lips were pressing against each other. Jim felt her body against his in a way that no woman had for a long time, and suddenly, he was lost in her kiss, the smell of her hair, the texture of her skin and her jumpsuit under his fingers…
She slung an arm around him, and held him close, kissing him with an intensity that seemed to grow every second, along with his own. He pushed her up against one of the crumbling walls, their breaths hot against each other's lips. Jim felt her hands work their way under his shirt, caressing his chest, at the same time as he found the master zipper in her jumpsuit and opened it with a small clicking sound. Suddenly, the suit was gone, her skin white and shining in the dark, as his own clothes was removed by eager hands. He grabbed her around the waist and they slid down along the wall, finding a rhythm, their hands never ceasing to stroke the other's body. In the half-light of the sunset, Jim saw her throw her head back, her face a mask of ecstasy, at the same time as he himself felt a greater pleasure than in years upon years, and then everything vanished in a haze of orange, black and white…
Later – what felt like an eternity later, but the sun on the sky was still a fiery orange – they lay together, their arms around each other, under an improvised cover of their clothes. She propped herself up on one elbow and looked down at him.
"You know…there's cards that I didn't show you…"
"What's that?"
"My card. Our card. The Lovers." She smiled, and let a finger curve his cheek.
"This is so far from right…you work for the Dealer. Your goal is everything that I fight against."
"How do you know that, Jim? You have only seen small pieces of the puzzle. Imagine how you would feel, if you could see all…like the Dealer. Then, maybe you would understand that we don't have to be enemies."
He let a hand caress her back.
"That card…the Hermit. Betrayal? Do you expect me to betray my friends?"
"I don't expect anything, Jim. I was merely retelling what I was told to say. Now…" she bent over him, and kissed him again, "why don't we stop wasting time?"
He kissed her back, but as he felt her hair fall down around his cheeks in the middle of the kiss, he heard the chimes again.
"Damn it…not now…" he thought, but the chimes grew louder and louder….and suddenly, the feel of Rhea's arms around him was gone, and he floated in darkness, not knowing what was up or down. Little specks of light flew past his eyes, and he had time to think that they looked like the burning ashes of a cigarette, before he felt the cotton sheet under his body, and saw the cool light of the San Francisco morning shine though his window.
"I see, my son. So…what is your point to this story?"
Jim realized he had been speaking for a long time. The priest on the other side must have been bored to tears.
"My point? I guess, well…there's the sex, of course, even though I suppose you could say it wasn't really REAL sex….more like a really wet dream…and then, there's the thought of…"
"Betrayal?"
"That's a nasty word, Father!"
"It's the one you used in your story. Does it tempt you?"
"That's the thing. I don't know! I mean, sometimes I look at my friends – Andrew, Herbert, Mercedes and Murph – and think that they're the best thing that ever happened to me…I haven't had friends like that since, well…since time out of mind. But sometimes…"
"Sometimes you wonder if they would be better off without you. If they are complete in their own world, and doesn't need you to be there. Right?"
"Yeah…right, I suppose."
"Well…" The voice on the other side said, and sounded a little louder, as if the priest moved closer to the window's mesh, "I don't think I can advice you, my son. I think, you must look into yourself to find out what to do. But thanks for coming. I appreciate it."
"Yeah, you're welcome."
Jim got up, opened the sliding door and took a step out, but stopped. "Wait…hey, Father, isn't there supposed to be some sort of penance? Like a couple of Hail Marys and 10 bucks in the collection box?"
No answer came from the other side of the window. Jim leaned back in and looked through the window. "Hey Father…did you fall asleep…?"
His voice got stuck in his throat, when he saw that the confessional was empty. Moreover, there was no sign that it had been in use for a while. A thin layer of dust covered the seat.
Jim took a few steps back, looking around, but seeing no one close by.
"I don't know what the heck is going on here, but I know one thing…I was right. The church IS a freaky place!" he thought, and walked quickly towards the exit.