Ah! I'm leaving tomorrow! For europe... And hell yes, I'm excited. LOL, I'll miss you guys...adn these updates. But it's only for two weeks...and I'm bring my fanfictions ona flashdriver so, if I can get my hands on a computer with internet, I'll try to update!

Go Shiro Ryuu! You've read Boys Next Door! LOL, I'm in love with Lawrence. he's just so sexy and cute at the same time... huggles Lawrence I made a T-shirt that says, "I heart Lawrence" like those I heart NY ones. I also have a I heart BR one. Woo! Go tendershipping!

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Bakura

Everything was clean. Much too clean.

Ryou had apparently done the laundry, dusted, wiped and house spotless, and Ra knows what else overnight. The whole house reeked of Lysol and everything shined in a eerie perfection. I found Ryou in his closet, not huddling or crying just…sitting there.

"Ryou…are you…okay?" I approached his cautiously as if I were a predator stalking its prey.

Ryou only nodded his head up and down, forcing his lips into a strange, obviously fake smile. His first smile in weeks.

"Did you clean the house?" Again, another nod and a all-too-cheerful smile that did not light up his eyes. I studied him for a moment and the smiled slid off to reveal a broken expression.

"You don't like it, do you?" Ryou whispered, barely audible in his soft voice. I had a sudden foresight of Ryou beginning to cry if I said no.

"No! I…like it." I quickly assured him. The unnerving smile returned and Ryou rested his head on the wall. "Ryou…why are you in the closet?" A blank stare entered Ryou's eyes before he spoke, making me wonder if I had said the wrong thing.

"I…wanted to stay out of your way." What?

"You're not in my way, Ryou." The sudden weirdness was confusing me. "Do you want to come out?" Ryou hesitated, unsure.

"um…okay." I stepped to the side as Ryou got up and walked out the door, immediately sitting back down against the wall of his room.

"Are you going to be okay?" I spoke softly, not wanting to startle my hikari. He, in turn, nodded quickly and hugged a knee to his chest.

I gave him one, final last look before making my way out of Ryou's room and shutting the door, wondering what I had done to my own hikari.

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From that day forward, the house stayed in it's sparkling clean state with it's lemon scent and bleached look staining every corner. Though I tried to get him to stop, Ryou spent all his time either cleaning desperately or sitting quietly I his closet.

"Why are you doing this?" I said to Ryou when he was pouring a cup of bleach into the washing machine. A blank look told me of his confusion.

"All this…cleaning, I mean." I continued. "Why do you do it?" Ryou let the thick liquid in the blue cup trickle into the white machine before saying anything.

"I thought that it would make you happy." He said in his soft, broken voice. "I'll stop."

And he did. Just like that.

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I stroked the glass figurine in my hand that reminded me so much of my hikari. Essences of sky poured onto the glass pane in front of me, blurring the outside world and making me taste the sweet smell of rain in the air. The beat and smell soaked my senses in its cold, smoothing mud texture and cleansed my mind with its strange beauty.

The glass angel's silent voice fell in rhythm with Rain, its accompanist drummer who beat his steady beat on the cold pane of glass in front of me. I relaxed, enjoying the hauntingly silent music that existed only in my head, and let my thoughts drift to Ryou.

I mused that he was like an angel with that gentle spirit and frail beauty. After all, he had lifted me from 3000 years of bitter, loathing darkness.

Ryou was mine. That thought twisted satisfaction in my heart. He was my…angel? I smiled in amusement at that thought.

But an angel of what? Of light? Darkness? Life? Death?

Love?

My fingers gripped the glass angel in my hand tightly at that thought, all amusement disappearing. Did I love Ryou? Sure, I felt the urge to protect him, but was that because of…love?

I had had myself halfway convinced that I couldn't love. That my dead village had turned my heart cold. But now, this soft boy who was my other half…could it be that I love him?

"Bakura." A familiar, hollow voice added ot my collection of sounds. I turned and saw my hikari at the doorway, one hand still gripping the metal knob.

Bakura…" He said again. I waited. "I think I know what might make you happy." I raised an eyebrow at this, a bit curious. Ryou shifted his insecure gaze to the floor. "You…like to hurt people, right?" Ryou looked back at me as if hoping for some form of encouragement. Finding none, he lowered his gaze once more and continued.

"I'll let you…do whatever you want to me." Ryou paused. "You can hurt me if you like. Anything…if it makes you happy." Again, he raised his gaze to me, letting it settle there for a few seconds as if asking, "would you like that?" before shutting the door, leaving me in the shadows once more.

So…Ryou had decided to become my slave to try and earn my approval? I imagined my hikari a lifeless servant who thought of nothing but his "master" and found it, much to my surprise, unappealing. I did not want Ryou as my slave.

I wanted him as my angel.

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Ryou was sitting on his bed looking blank and lifeless when I found him. Only when I sat down next to him did he notice me.

"So…you'll do anything I want you to, huh?" I reached out and fingered a lock of his soft hair, getting closer to my hikari than we were used to.

I could not find a way to deal with my love for him but I could satisfy my lust easily.

Ryou nodded, just like I knew he would while his eyes watched me as I crawled behind him, wrapping my arms around his shoulders and neck. I didn't want to see his expression as I did this.

Then do me a favor and surrender your body to me completely." I whispered in his ear, resting my chin on his shoulder.

"Will it make you happy?" I blinked at Ryou's voice. I had not expected him to ask such a question.

"Yes…very much so." No harm in playing along, I decided. Wrapping my legs around Ryou's middle, I lowered a hand to his abdomen and began to undo the zipper on his jeans. Ryou made no move to stop me but I saw fear swirl in his chocolate eyes.

A sudden flash of lightening reminded me of the rain and startled Ryou. The loud boom following it made him grab my arm and squeeze his eyes shut in terror.

I forced myself not to feel any remorse as I slid Ryou's jeans off, revealing dark blue boxers and painfully thin and pale legs. I shed my own shirt and began to stroke Ryou along the inside and his thighs, making him gasp and lead further in my chest. Discovering that my torso was bare, Ryou widened his eyes and he tensed his body against mine.

I began to suck on his neck, one arm pressing him against me as my free hand tugged at Ryou's boxers. A whimper came from Ryou's throat as I slid his boxers off, caressing the inside of his thighs and sinking my teeth into his neck. The same red blood that was scattered on the shards of Ryou's broken mirror so many weeks ago added to my desperate lust for him as its sweet, intoxicating flavor drowned my senses and thoughts.

I tightened the my legs around Ryou's waist and laid on the bed, dragging him down with me. Still holding Ryou to my chest, I used my free hand to pull my own jeans off. Ryou whimpered again when he discovered both my legs were bare and I saw him squeeze his eyes shut in terror. I ran my hand through his hair, stroking his head as if consoling him.

I pulled Ryou's soft, cotton shirt over his head, making him shiver from the sudden nudity, and flipped our bodies so I was on top. I pressed his shoulders to the mattress so he was forced to face me and, in a lustful rage, began to kiss him brutally. Ryou did nothing to stop me, just acted like he did as I undressed him- a blank, lifeless doll.

I grabbed both his wrists and held then high above his head, breaking the kiss momentarily to look around for something to tie him to the bed with. Finding a belt, I bound Ryou's wrists to a bedpost and leaned back down to continue the forceful kiss, snaking my hands up and down his chest.

I broke the kiss to slip my own boxers off and a soft moan escaped Ryou's bruised lips. He struggled against his bondage as I put my hands on either side of him, outlining his thin figure roughly. Ryou shuddered when I reached his hips, giving a sudden gasp as my fingers swept pass his length. I pressed my own arousal against Ryou's and saw his bound hands clench into fists. Something between a cry and a moan escaped Ryou's lips and I smiled, enjoying the soft melody of my hikari's voice.

I slipped a finger up Ryou's passageway, reviving the sound of Ryou's voice in the form of a cry. I slid in another finger, hoping to hear his voice again, and made Ryou moan in pain, whispering silent words in his mouth.

Pushing Ryou's legs apart, I got in between then and watched terror dance in his eyes. I bit my lip and entered him.

Ryou gave a strangled cry as I forced myself in him. I let him cry against my neck and I entered him again and again, forming a steady rhythm. Ryou's screams of pain eventually became screams of pleasure as I entered him again and again.

Finally, I rolled off of my hikari and sank into the mattress, gasping for breath in exhaustion. I reached up and untied Ryou from his bed and tossed the belt aside wincing at het black and blue marks that had appeared around Ryou's delicate wrists.

"Are you happy?" Ryou's voice whispered in the darkness, with only the still pounding rain as accompanist.

"Happy?" I momentarily forgot the promise I had made to Ryou. Big mistake. Hurt and confusion shined in Ryou's eyes and desperation begged at me in his voice when he spoke.

"Did I do something wrong?" Ryou sounded frantic, close to tears. "Did I…not do it right?"

I stared at him, dumbfounded. He was not upset because I had raped him but because he think that I'm not satisfied?

"You were perfect." I hugged him to my chest tightly. "of course I'm happy."

"Really?" All fear put aside, Ryou sounded breathless. He was exhausted.

"Yes, but right now, you're tired." I ran my hand through his hair, caressing his head. "Go to sleep now and get some rest, okay?"

"But-" Ryou stopped himself midsentence, pausing and slowly nodding in my chest.

"But what?" I wanted to know. Ryou said nothing. "It's alright. You can tell me- I won't get mad or anything." I pressed my hand to the back of his head to reassure him.

"but when I sleep…" Ryou whispered. "The nightmares come. I wake up screaming…I don't want to wake you up and…bother you." I frowned.

"Stop worrying about me." I said against his forehead. "Just go to sleep." I tightened my hold I had on Ryou, feeling my thoughts fog into a black void.

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Ryou

I woke up in Bakura's arms.

In Bakura's arms. With his strong arms hugging me to his chest and his scent blurring in my head like some kind of drug. I decided I liked the way he smelled an the way has arms felt around me.

I controlled my emotions though. Because, you see, if I didn't, I might make more mistakes. That was hard to do though because Bakura had told me that I had made him happy and I did not have a single nightmare as I slept and now I was in his arms.

I watched Bakura began to wake, first cracking open one eye and then opening the other. He turned to me and smiled a bit before patting me on the head as if I were a dog.

I didn't mind though.

"Did you sleep well?" Bakura murmured, still half asleep. I bobbed my head up and down to tell him yes. "You want a shower?" Again, I nodded, aware of the sticky substance coated on my abdomen and thighs.

"Come one, then." Bakura untangled himself from by body and sat up, rubbing his eyes. I got to my feet and immediately gave a cry of pain at the burning throb on my backside. I fell to my knees and squeezed my eyes closed, forcing myself not ot cry. To cry would be to be bad. No…I mustn't cry.

I felt Bakura's arms wrap themselves around me and pull me to my feet. Letting myself relax into his arms, I felt him pick me up with the same arms that I woke in.

"Are you okay?" Receiving another bobbing nod, Bakura carried me to the bathroom where he set me on the toilet seat. After toying with the temperature of the shower for a bit, Bakura turned back to me and hoisted me to my feet, letting me lean on him for support.

"Ryou?" I turned toward the mention of my name, cocking my head. "You're really…concerned about my happiness, huh?" I nodded at this. I would do anything to please Bakura. "Well, Well, what about you?" I blinked. What about me?

"Do you ever…feel happy? Bakura's question startled me. My own happiness was not something I was concerned about.

"Well?" I bit my lip. I was expecting an answer.

"I…don't mind…not being happy." I hoped that would settle the matter. Please let Bakura just leave it… He gave me a long, hard look before handing me the shampoo bottle.

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Bakura

I wanted to see Ryou smile.

His statement on his own well-being both shocked me and sickened me. No…I sickened myself.

There was this gentle boy who cared more about me, for some mysterious reason, than himself and what did I do? I…raped him. Not only that but he let me.

Ryou had let me hurt him because his self image was so fucking low that he was completely willing to let himself be hurt just because he thought it might please me.

I wanted to make him smile again.

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"Ryou?" I motioned for my hikari to come to me. "Come here- I have something to give you." Ryou came to me without question and stood facing me, waiting.

I took his hand in my own and reached into my pocket to grasp the glass figurine I had bought so many weeks ago in that lonely, little shop. Watching Ryou's expression, I slid it in his hand and enclosed his fingers around it. No expression crossed Ryou's blank eyes as he stared at the little glass angel in his hand.

"That's for you." I said just to make sure he understood.

"Like…a present?" the breathless hope in his voice was in stark contrast to his blank expression, as if he dared not believe it.

"Yes…like a present." I confirmed. There was a long silence before Ryou smiled softly.

"Thank you." Ryou stroked the angel in his hand oh so gently.

"you should smile more. You look so pretty when you do." I blinked at the words that were so absentmindedly coming out of my mouth. Could these cheesy words really be coming from me? Oh well…this was Ryou. My hikari. It was absolutely pointless to keep anything from him.

Ryou had begun to lift a hand to his mouth as if he had not realized he was smiling when I kissed him.

What was there to hide from my own hikari?

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Ryou

Bakura was kissing me.

Not hard or forced like that night he took me but soft to it was like he was whispering in my mouth.

An he had given me an angel. An angel that resembled Amane and seemed to sing ot me in her sweet voice.

And then he kissed me so gently.

And I kissed back.

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Ah, I know. Chessiness. Eh...

I knwo I was going to put the lemon in an anotehr account but... got lazy But I got Bakura and Ryou to get together...right? There's at least something right. mor eangst in the next chapter though. I just realized that there's actually not very many mor echapters until the end...

Only three reviews? AW... C'mon... More? PLease...? Thanks to all who did review though! They mean a lot to me. I just love it when I see one in my inbox. PLEASE READ ADN REVIEW. I'll tryto update in Europe.