Hi everybody! I'm back from Europe and had a great time. Anybody else been ot Prague? I thought the city was absolutely beautiful. Vienna too. I got lotsa Rammstein CDs in Berlin, which I'm listening to right now. When our tour group went from Vienna to Prague, we had such a great time harrassing this poor driver who was driving with nothing on but a speedo swimsuit. HIs passenger was completely naked teh first time we passed them adn the second time, he was clutchinga small pillow ot his lap. The third time, he was wearing pants. XD XD XD
Yeah...needless to say, I had a great time.
I missed home though! And hte lines for internet were so long...I did update over there. But i am now... And, yes, there was Yugioh stuff there! I saw many shounen manga/anime magazine with Yugioh or GX stuff in there. And they had all twenty volumes of Angel Sanctuary...too bad they were all in German. -sigh-
Anyway...on with the story!
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Bakura
It had been a week since I gave Ryou that glass angel and…things changed. Ryou smiled more because I made him smile and, for the first time in thousands of years, I felt the strange human emotion known as "love."
But Ryou had not changed.
He smiled shyly but that hallow look never left his eyes. He ate and slept at regular intervals but only because he knew I wanted him to.
In other words, he was just as depressed as before only better at hiding it.
In was because of me, I knew that much. I tried to tell him stories and kiss him more, make him smile gently with that wavering innocence only he had.
I didn't work.
Nothing did. Frustration built up in me and I was ready to snap and lash out at him every time I looked upon his face.
Was it love? Love wouldn't allow this, would she? You were supposed to have an unconditional tolerance for the one you love. Perhaps I did not truly love Ryou. And my emotions were only one of a yami that wanted to go to the spirit world.
Could I, Yami Bakura, even experience this love? The death of my family with my joining of Zork supposedly took care of all my emotions. Wasn't love an emotion? Or was it merely instinct for the survival of a species? I, being a spirit, had no emotions not instincts.
How could I love Ryou?
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Ryou
Bakura-sama was with me to stay and I had not made any more mistakes to make him leave. He told me stories and kissed me soft and light like he did when he gave me my glass angel to I did knot understand why he wanted to leave.
"I can't be at your side every second, Ryou." His breath had been hot against my neck, holding sharp petals of irritation. "I'm going insane."
Insane? He was going insane because of being with me?
But now he was gone with his warm presence and I was empty and horribly alone. I crawled over to the door where I had last seen him and remembered has movements, playing them over and over like a endless CD that's stuck in your head.
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Bakura
I saw that the shop where I had bought the angel figurine was bankrupt as I walked down that cracked sidewalk. No old woman sat at the boarded up door and the techi-colored posters that sat, dusty, on the glass had vanished.
I felt an unreasonable hate toward that angel. Ryou and I had not turned out well at all. Our relationship had not worked out smoothly, like I had wanted.
Maybe I had expected the wrong things.
Ryou was insane. I had to get that through my thick skull. Seeking a relationship with him was useless. Being around the insane only led to insanity for myself.
Why couldn't he fucking heal? I kissed him, didn't I? I had given him a gift and I had kissed him. I held him and I talk him stories. I never left his side. I went way out of my comfort zone and sought a fucking relationship. What more could he want?
I had walked dozens of blocks before I realized that there was no place to go. Driving myself mad with my own thoughts was not going to help. Cursing Ra, I turned around and began my walk back.
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The first sight that greeted my eyes was Ryou, whom I had watched for the course of two weeks now. He was hugging the glass angel to his chest and stared at me when I came in.
I decided right then and there that I hated that angel.
It was somehow responsible for my blind hope. It had somehow tricked me into loving my own hikari.
Ryou gave a cry when I tore his precious gift out of his hands. It's melancholy familiarity was mocking as I glared at it. I was watching Ryou's wide eyes as the angel shattered against the hard wood floor. His eyes reflected the broken glass with an intensity that shattered something inside of me as well. I didn't glance at the small triangles on the ground as I left.
The only thing I wanted to remember was the dull click of the shutting door behind me.
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Ryou
Bakura was really gone now.
So was my angel who was so very much like my little sister. But my little sister was dead. And so was my angel.
This time, the mess was Bakura's. My fault though. My fault because I was the one who had made him mad so I also played a role in the tragedy.
I grabbed a glass triangle knife and decided that it was time to end my part in the horrible play.
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EEK! I hope no one will kill me for breaking up Ryou and Bakura...
I mean, they WILL be together in the end but...I didn't want ot fic to end so soon! And, also, I didn't feel like their getting together was very...ending-ful. oO It just didn't complete a picture...you know what I mean? And I really wanted to do more with the angel. You'll see where this is going next chapter.
I'm really loving my new Rammstein CDs right now. Has anyone else heard of them? I just love Till's voice. I mean, he's a bit ugly but his voice is really beautiful. Did you know that he was a basket weaver before he was in Rammstein? Yeah...and Richard heard his humming as he worked adn asked him ot join them in this music contest.
Review? Please? Hugs if you do.