Disclaimer: I don't own the world of Harry Potter, that's JK Rowling.
Patronus
It seems all you do lately is cry.
Your eyes are bloodshot and tired, your usually bright hair is a mousy brown, and the man that you love is on a suicide mission.
You were always bright, bubbly, happy Tonks. Even after an eight hour night shift you'd always manage a smile while nodding over your breakfast. You could brighten the mood in any situation.
You tell yourself it's just the war. It's because Sirius is dead and you could've saved him. You tell yourself it's the Dementors swarming the tiny village where you're working.
You tell yourself if you keep thinking that then maybe someday you'll believe it.
But, you never will.
Every time you close your eyes he's there, you see him in everything you do, if you let your thoughts wander for a moment all you can think of is him.
And no matter what you tell yourself you can't escape it. You love a man thirteen years older than you, a man miles away fighting some inner battle that you will never understand, a man who now doesn't give any indication of loving you back, yet you know he does.
Auror Savage calls your name, and you run to him. Your partner faces at least 15 Dementors, his seal Patronus tries to drive them away, but it's not strong enough. You pull out your wand, the cold overwhelms you.
…Bellatrix laughs as her spell hits you, and you fall over backwards and know only darkness…
…Remus tells you the news of Sirius' death, and he fights back tears as he tells you how your cousin fell…
…A lupine howl fades to a human scream, you find him bloody and lifeless…
"Expecto…" You yell, pushing the scenes from your mind. You search for a happy memory.
…Your first day at Hogwarts…
You focus on that, but to you the memory feels almost fake; you can't feel the joy you felt when you were eleven on entering a new exciting place, when the castle lights can be clearly seen to your left.
…The first time you saw him. Remus smiles and catches you as you fall….
…You lean in towards him, you've never been this close before, and you would almost hear every word before he said it, but there was nothing needed to be said…You run your fingers through his hair, and he closes the gap that wasn't really there…
You can remember that kiss as clearly as you can see Savage fall beside you, you raise your wand and finish the spell.
"Expecto Patronum!"
A great four-legged creature made of silvery mist shoots from your wand and drives the Dementors back.
You worst memories, your greatest memories, and the ones that never really happened but someday could, are of him.
And you stop telling yourself lies, because you'll never forget.
Your Patronus is a Werewolf.
Fin.
A/N: This was inspired by Sarah McLachlan's "Stupid". Thanks to my friend Prongsies for beta-ing! Please read & review!