No Monsters Here

A/N: This one's been hovering in the wings since before I posted chapter 2, but I only finished it today. Enjoy! Warning: slash.

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"Why have you been avoiding me?" The plaintive pain in Sirius's voice took Remus by surprise.

"I…"

Sirius was looking right at him, his eyes dry but full of pain, his voice level. "At first I thought you'd changed your mind about us. But then on Friday I realised it was the full moon, so I attributed it to that. But it's been eight days." His voice cracked slightly. "It's been eight freaking days, Remus, and you won't even look at me! I don't get it! I thought you really… you said you loved me. Was that just a joke to you? Or just an experiment?" His voice rose now: "I wasn't just messing with you, Remus. Last Tuesday night meant something to me, it meant a lot actually. And now you've just turned on me, and I don't understand." He refused to cry. He could shout, get as angry as he wanted, but he wouldn't cry. No.

"You know, it's quite ironic if you think about it," Remus said softly, sitting down on the other end of the bed. "I mean, putting it down to the moon… it's like with girls. If they get tetchy, you can put it down to the time of the month." He gave a mirthless smile. "I guess it's the same for werewolves."

Sirius's anger was quickly deflating, and now he felt lost. He looked into Remus's eyes again, and suddenly the brown-haired boy hugged him. Unsure what to make of this, he asked quietly: "Does this mean 'I'm sorry, let's stay friends'?"

Remus sighed gently. "No, just 'I'm sorry'."

Sirius's heart sank. So he wasn't even going to salvage the friendship. He should have known that an attempt at a relationship would ruin everything…

Suddenly, a quiet voice interrupted his dread-laden thoughts. "Can you love a werewolf?"

Sirius broke the embrace and moved back to look Remus in the eye. "You could be the Devil himself and it wouldn't matter to me."

His heart turned over as he saw Remus's hazel eyes soften and warm. "Do you really mean that? What about the danger you'd be in every month? Could you trust me-" Sirius cut off his words by placing one finger over his lips.

"Of course I can trust you, Rem. I told you once, wasn't that enough? I love you, you fool."

Remus sniffed. "Damn you, you've got me all emotional again."

Sirius smiled. "Then I've got you right where I want you." He lifted his hand to stroke Remus's hair, trying to commit every soft shade of his skin to memory. The hazel eyes slid closed slowly, and a small smile spread over Remus's face. "I love you too," he murmured. "I'm sorry I messed up so bad."

"It doesn't matter," Sirius replied, and he meant it. It didn't matter any more. "Just don't ever do that to me again, okay? Don't shut me out… all I want to do is make you happy."

"You have." Remus opened his eyes again, looking solemn. "I promise I'll never do it again." He took hold of Sirius's hand. "God, I've missed you."

"I missed you too," Sirius whispered, squeezing his hand. "You know, you're lucky I don't give up easily, or else I'd probably have concussion by now, and we'd both still be miserable."

Remus looked at him quizzically. "Why would you have concussion?"

"Oh, I…" Sirius blushed slightly. "I just got hit by Bludgers a couple of times in practice. I was thinking about things, so I wasn't really looking out."

A look of worry flooded over Remus's face. "Did you get hit in the head? Are you okay?"

"I'm fine, really," Sirius insisted.

"Did you get hit in the head?"

"Yes, okay, I did, once."

Remus sighed. "Stop being heroic. You might have concussion already." He shuffled closer and took Sirius's head in both hands. "You've got a bump, you know."

"Have I?"

"Yes, you have," Remus said quietly, moving closer again, running his fingers gently over the side of Sirius's head. "Want me to kiss it better?"

Sirius didn't speak; the sensation of soothing fingers on his scalp verged on hypnotic.

Remus did it anyway, laying soft kisses on the raised area of skin.

A few seconds was all Sirius could take, before he reached up, caught Remus's slim wrists in his hands, and pinned him back against the head of the bed. Remus's eyes sparked with mischief. "That was a speedy recovery, Padfoot."

Sirius wasn't in the mood to play along. "Do you have any idea what that did to me?"

Remus's gaze descended into burning heat and anticipation. "I'm not entirely sure, but I'm guessing it was good."

"You bet it was good," Sirius answered, his voice almost a purr. "I just can't decide where to go from here." He kept the smaller boy pinned with ease, lowering his face closer till they were almost touching. Slowly, deliberately, he brushed his lips against Remus's, pulling away after just a second. He watched the amber eyes fall from power into a pleading expression as he repeated the action, never ceding more than a second's contact. After watching Remus's facial descent into helplessness for several moments, he felt suddenly as if an invisible hand pushed him hard in the small of his back, sending him tumbling down to Remus's level. Forced down, it was difficult to keep control.

A wonderfully long moment later, he was able to pull back and look at the smaller boy's face. He was beautiful. His cheeks were the most delicate shade of pink, his eyes glowing, and his lips suggestively bruised. Right now they were forming into a sneaky smile. Suddenly Sirius had a brainwave as to what had just happened. "Moony, was that by any chance wandless magic?"

"Maybe…"

Sirius looked at him in surprised wonder. "I didn't know you could do that."

"Neither did I." Remus seemed shocked at his own ability. "I've never done it before." He let out a long breath and smiled. "I guess you bring out the best in me."

"Damn right," Sirius murmured, unable to take his eyes off of the face looking up at him. At the corner of his vision, he could see Remus's chest rising and falling softly with his breathing, his lips slightly parted. "You look…" He couldn't even finish his sentence. "God, Rem, I love you."

"I love you too," Remus whispered back, pulling himself up into a sitting position and rubbing his wrists to get the feeling back.

Sirius watched him, a frown creasing his forehead. "Did I hurt you?"

Still holding his right wrist, Remus gave an amused smile. "I can't help feeling we've been here before."

Sirius ran a hand over his dark hair and grinned. "Ah yes… if I remember correctly, I kissed it better last time."

Remus didn't speak; he just raised one eyebrow and held out his hand imperiously. Sirius took hold of it and kissed his wrist gently.

After a few moments, two things happened simultaneously. Remus had a realisation that made him bite his lip and go tense, and Sirius slid his sleeve up a little.

"Remus…" He stopped suddenly, still holding Remus's hand but now staring at the skin of his wrist. He blinked furiously to dispel the unexpected tears that had appeared at the sight of a new, ugly scar that started at the wrist and wound its way up Remus's arm. "Is this from last Friday?"

Remus nodded wordlessly, watching in fear for Sirius's reaction.

His reaction was, in the end, to push the sleeve up past Remus's elbow, at last reaching the other end of the scar. He ran his fingers along the raised skin, feeling the mutilated contours. "You heal quickly," he whispered at last; he didn't trust himself to say any more.

"It's a part of what I am," Remus replied. "Monsters always heal fast."

Suddenly, he felt himself pressed up against the head of the bed again. Sirius was looking straight at him with an expression of anger similar to the time that James had bewitched the shampoo to turn Sirius's hair pink. "Don't you ever say that again," he growled.

"Say what?"

"You're not a monster," Sirius's voice had softened. "You're not," he repeated. "You're sweet, and beautiful, and perfect." He slowly brushed his fingertips down the side of Remus's face, looking into his eyes in quiet appeal.

Remus turned his head away. "I am a monster, Sirius. Look at this scar; look at all my other scars. I did it. All of it. When there's a full moon I'll hurt anyone who comes near me. How can I not be a monster?"

Sirius slid his hand under Remus's jaw and turned his face back round so their eyes met again. "I can't judge you on something that happens once a month without you ever asking for it. Yes, I'll admit that on the full moon, you're dangerous. But you never asked for any of it. And how can I trust what I see then when I spend the rest of the month seeing the real you? The real you is sweet, and kind, and funny, and loving… and I love you. You're not a monster; you're not even close. Please don't say that you are."

Remus blinked resolutely back at him. Then he lowered his eyes. "Sorry," he whispered.

Sirius sighed. "It's not your fault, angel. None of it's your fault." He put his arms around the smaller boy and hugged him tightly. "I'm sorry I got mad. I didn't mean to make you upset."

"It's okay," Remus murmured, enjoying the sensation of Sirius's hands drawing small circles on his back. At length, he wrapped his own arms around Sirius's body and nuzzled into his neck. "Do you think we'll ever get past this stuff?"

Sirius let him go and sat back, frowning in thought. "I don't know. I hope so."

"Me too."

There was a brief silence, almost awkward until Remus reached out with one hand. Sirius moved to sit next to him, holding his hand. After a while, the dark-haired boy raised one hand to stroke Remus's cheek, tracing patterns over the skin and staring into his eyes.

Remus's lips curled into a slight smile. "Ever the romantic cliché…"

Sirius mirrored his expression with a hint of a challenge. "Excuse me?" Receiving no answer, he slipped his fingers under Remus's chin again and drew him closer. "Was that a criticism of my moves, dear Moony?"

"Maybe," Remus answered, managing – to his surprise – to remain completely calm.

Sirius shook his head slightly. "I can see I'll have to teach you better than that." He leaned in and dropped a light kiss on Remus's lips, taking his chance to be the tease again.

But this time, Remus wasn't having it. As Sirius drew back to smile wickedly, he felt the same force as before, knocking him down onto his back. Remus sat looking down at him. "This wandless magic thing is great, isn't it?" he asked casually, smiling at Sirius's look of surprise. "I wonder what else I can do with it." He concentrated for a moment or two, and the hangings on the bed whisked shut, leaving the two of them shut off from the rest of the world. "How useful," he commented, before leaning down and settling himself half across Sirius. "You look so pretty when you're surprised," he whispered in his ear, and kissed him.

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A/N: Chapter 4 is already in progress, and there may be some seasonal Xmas / New Year things up soon. Review!