Into the Woods
5:00 a.m.
The Kitchen
I shouldn't even be awake right now. In fact, no one should, and it should be against the law to do so. But Dad says this is the best time to get a tree.
I'm still not quite sure how we're going to find one.
Seeing as it's rather dark.
I'd prefer if I could actually see the bloody tree before we bring it home! I suppose it's to each their own. Dad's just like that.
Ooh, but Dad did say he'd let me use magic. Apparently, the Ministry doesn't actually know when someone underage--me--does magic in a large wizarding household--the Burrow.
Very, very sneaky.
Not, of course, that I hadn't already figured this out.
I mean, having Hermione as a friend has its perks, right?
Merlin, who am I kidding? (Besides you, obviously.) If I'd known that sooner, my brothers would have pig buttocks for brains.
Except for Harry, though technically he's not a brother.
So he's safe.
5:45 a.m.
The Forest
I didn't even know we had a forest by the Burrow, but apparently we do, seeing as we're in it. (That sounded a bit stupid, didn't it? I suppose it would, but look who I've got for brothers. Well, except that Bill is brilliant, though not in his choice of women.)
I think there's some sunlight, though I could be mistaken.
Er, no, that's Dad's wand.
Bollocks, I really was hoping there for a moment. My wand isn't nearly that bright. Wonder why...
We've stopped to have a quick rest, because we've been walking deeper and deeper into this place which oddly seems to have never existed before.
Funny how that happens.
I don't even remember the tree last year. Did we even have one?
And where did we get it?
That's the important stuff.
Dad must think I'm mad for bringing you with me. He's been giving me funny looks for the last five minutes.
Now I know where Ron gets it, though I expect Dad doesn't look as stupid when he's confused. Ron must have come out wrong.
?
The Forest
I have found a squirrel. I shall name him Eggbert. He's just staring at me, looking sweet. WHat a weeny thing, I want to touch it.
?
Somewhere in the Forest
Eggbert is not in a good mood. He must have rabies or a wife that harps on him all day long. Stupid thing shouldn't even be out in the winter. I thought squirrels hibernated.
So now I'm all alone.
In the dark.
In the middle of a forest that shouldn't even be here!
I must be getting fat, or something, because apparently I couldn't keep up with Dad, and now I'm lost.
Perhaps it's just because I have short legs.
Which is slightly more comforting.
But not really.
I'd rather be fat and with Dad than alone with short legs.
Short legs that won't get me away fast enough if something decides ot come after me. Like maybe a Lethifold.
Merlin, even thinking about it makes me shudder.
Except, if Phlegm comes to rescue me, I think I'd rather brave the Lethifold. Because she makes me shudder, too.
Only, then I'd get eaten.
Which is rather disgusting, I think, though so is she.
?
Deeper into the Forest
Shouldn't it be geting sunnier by now? You'd think it would, though I expect I've moved farther inot the forest. If the forest wasn't here before, then why did it appear now?
I think it knew I was going to get lost. That's the only explanation. It's doing this just to spit me.
Well, it won't work!
?
Somewhere else in the Forest.
I'm getting bloody sick of this now! Where's Harry when you need him? He's always saved me before, now the one time...
Oh, right. He's still sleeping.
My rescuer is sleeping. HE doesn't even know I've left the Burrow. How could he? We don't share a room. (Though, I wish we did.)
I am going to die.
?
Another Place in the Forest
I think I must have passed out. Good thing, too, because I've just remembered that if you're lost, you're supposed to stay in one place.
Oh well.
Actually, that seems a bit stupid. Because if there's a manticore about to run you through, and you're lost, wouldn't you run? I mean, it'll chase after you, but you can always get away.
Well, you can if you've got a wand. Muggles seem to have the worst of luch that way. The silly things haven't even got brooms or wings or anything. I don't know how they've survived this long, but I expect they'll be dying out soon.
?
?
Hermione showed me a spell once. I think all you've got to do is put it in your hand and say 'Point me.' It'll point north.
I'll be home soon!
?
?
Which direction is the Burrow? I don't think it's north, seeing as the stupid wand is pointing directly in front of me.
Perhaps it is.
Or not.
I think I'll go south. That seems to be the way I came. Or suppose I keep going north? I'll get out eventually, right?
I think I'll stick to going south.
?
Somewhere in the Forest, but South
You'll never guess what I've found. I wish I could tell you that it's Dad, but it isn't. You see, my hero has come to me in the only form he could.
Unfortunately, Harry isn't here either. Just his knickers and his socks. I found them in my pocket. Somehow, that isn't much of a comfort to me.
?
Still South
It's been at least an hour. Shouldn't they have found me by now? I don't think I'd mind if Phlegm is the one to save me.
And that's rather difficult to admit, seeing as it's, well, Phlegm.
It's actually quite nice without her. Though I mean, I wish I was without her at the Burrow, and not here. REally, I'd be enjoying myself if I actually knew where I was. I should have stuffed it and stayed put. But, wouldn't it be quicker, you know, if we're looking for each other? That way, if we happen to meet...
If...
I, Ginevra Molly Weasley now know that if there is any amount of IF involved in anything at all, to stay away from it. Any uncertainty, and I shall refuse the thought.
IF the Dark Lord was posessing me...
IF Bill and Fleur get married...
IF falling from a broomstick might hurt a bit...
IF I tidy up my room...
IF I fancy Harry...
IF... What if Harry doesnt' fancy me?
You see where IF leads me?
?
A bit to the East
I want to go home.
?
A secluded clearing
I'm not going ot go anywhere else. I'm just going to stay here and hope that htis is where they look.
Actually, they'd be daft not to look her, seeing as I've sent up sparks. Stupid Ginny, not thinking of that before. IF I had, Dad and I would have a tree and be sipping hot chocolate in the kitchen, looking at it and forgetting this ever happened.
Why must everything happen to me?
I mean, not everything happens to me all of the time. It just seems like it whilst I'm on holiday. Rather ironic, really. We go to Hogwarts and nothing exciting happense. (Alright, there's loads of exciting things, but tht doesn't help my point.) And then we come here, to the Burrow, where nothing usually happens at all, except when the ghoul in the attic is feeling particularly stupid. Except for now. I never used to get lost in forests or steal knickers or make paper chains or
Or find hot chocolate in the middle of the forest?
I'm being perfectly serious,and I am not delusional.
(I hope not, at least.)
That must be the funny thing (though, not really) about going into a forest you know shouldn't exist--or any place, for that matter. You can't expect anything. (You can't not expect anything? If I survive, I'll ask Hermione.)
Especially not food that wasn't there two minutes ago, when you know you didn't put it there yourself.
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The Secluded Clearing
Hermione would be thrilled. I've got to tell this from start to finish, exactly as it happened, because otherwise it sounds like a bunch of rubbish, and you'll think I belong in a mad house.
As you know, there was a mug of hot chocolate just sitting there at the edge of the clearing. Not doing anything, not dancing about or being sipped by someone,(namely me), but sitting with the utmost innocence about it. Of couse, I thought I was losing it. ('It' being namely my mind.) Wouldn't you? But anyway, I walked up to it, and gave it a good sniff.
Then I sniffed it again.
So that was when I started to wonder just what my favourite sort of hot chocolate was doing there.
(Well, I did wonder a bit before. I'm not completely thick.)
Mum makes it especially for me. Loads of chocolate with a bit of cream and peppermint. Normaly, I hate peppermint, (nasty stuff tastes a bit like tonic), but you've got to understand that there's a difference between the rubbish you're given for Christmas to put on the tree, and the way it tastes mixed with chocolate. (I imagine that's how Harry tastes.)
(Actually, if Harry did taste like that, I expect I'd polish him off, and there'd be nothing left.)
(Which would be sad.)
(Moving on...)
So I picked up the mug, about to take a drink, when I realised that the handle was scalding. you know, like i'd jumped into a fire without bothering to put Floo Powder in it first. Which is also extremely stupid, though I don't doubt it's been done before. I suppose I'll have to keep an eye on Ron just in case.
So of course, I did the only logical thing there was to do.
I dropped it.
That was the single most depressing moment of my life. All of the hot chocolate was not splashed upon the front of my cardigan and onto the snow.
If you hadn't known it was hot chocolate, you would have found it disgusting. It looked a bit like someone had
Nevermind. On with the story.
I was staring at it in dismay, when suddenly a voice which sounded like a wheezing chipmunk said, "Will you be wanting another, Miss?"
I shrieked and scrambled backward as though it had bitten me. It was a bloody House Elf!
"Plinky is sorry for frightening the Miss," it said, bobbing its head. (Ah hah, that rhymes...)
I stared at it.
It stared right back, which is rather unnerving, seeing as it's got really large eyes, and they weren't blinking. (Slightly unnatural, I think.)
"Er..." It can't have expected anything more than that. All I'd seen for the past two hours was a disgruntled squirrel named Eggbert, who really, after some thought on my part, didn't look much like an Eggbert at all.
When if finally blinked, I felt rather relieved. I had thought perhaps I would have to watch its eyeballs dry up into its head as I sat there. "Miss, is you wanting another choclate? We is having lots more."
More? We?
"Um..."
It looked at me expectantly.
"Yeah? That, er... would be quite nice."
Of course it would be nice. I would get to meet more freakish elves who don't need to blink and live in the middle of a forest. Sounds wonderful. At least I knew I'd have chocolate.
I followed it (Plinky?) until we came to this rather large tree, which looked to be dotted with mushrooms.
Except, they weren't mushrooms. They were doors.
An honest mistake, right?
It turns out there's an entire colony of House Elves living there, inside of the tree. Merlin, there must have been hundreds of pairs of eyes (some were actually blinking) staring at me from the doors!
And then, they all tried to come at me with a whole manner of hot chocolates and cakes and sweets. All at once, mind you. One of them even had a wrinkly baby strapped to its back, (at least, I hope it was a baby), which was the ugliest thing I"ve ever seen. It's no wonder they keep the mums out of the kitchens at Hogwarts. I wouldn't want to bite into a sausage and suddenly find out that I've just decapitated a baby House Elf.
They were disappointed when I choe a mug of hot chocolate, that being all I had taken, so were only satisfied after they'd given me an entire cheesecake and a bowl of rice pudding. Then they all disappeared again, except the sausage baby and its mother. They stayed for a bit, and pressed something into my hands. I haven't looked at it yet. It's in my pocket.
I suppose it's a bit of a compliment to get so much food. They must think I'm underfed. I expect I must have short legs, then.
?
The Forest
I've been found!
At least, I've found Dad.
I mean, I was found by a colony of House Elves first...
But that's beside the point, because I've been rescued! We are now in search of the perfect tree, though it hasn't got much lighter outside. I suppose the sun is entitled to sleep even if I'm not.
I've told Dad about he elves, and he just sort of blinked at me.
Well, I expect I must have sounded a bit odd and stupid when I said it. But I suppose since he was determined to show he didn't fancy me mad, he had me take him to where I thought the colony was.
And there was only a tree.
No elves.
Bollocks.
It was too good to be true.
DAd must be trying exceptionally hard not to run away from his loony daughter.
Which would be me, obviously.
This is spiffing.
I am now the lunatic of the Weasley family.
7:59 a.m.
The Kitchen (at last!)
We've got the most bloody fantastic Christmas tree!
It is now sitting in the living room, where it should have been three hours ago.
Or something like that.
Surprisingly, (not), no one's up. All having a lie-in, even Mum.
Buggers, the whole lot of them.
I'm going to bed.
12:26 p.m.
My Room
I've just woken up. Seems I'm not the last one to do so, seeing as I'm sure Harry and Ron aren't up. (Fred and George too, but that's rather obvious.)
I don't feel much like going to the kitchen, as I don't really want to see Phlegm at the moment. I expect Mum will understand.
1:14 p.m.
The Kitchen
It would seem that Mum did NOT understand, and decided to drag me downstairs for a late breakfast.
Well, everyone else was there, too, and it looked a bit like Fred and George were about to murder her for waking them up.
Or, they would if they weren't partially afraid of them.
They love her, though. Everyone does.
Me especially. Us femailes must stick together here.
Otherwise, we'd all go bloody mad.
Oh, wait...
Funny. It must not have worked, the whole sticking together thing.
2:11 p.m.
The Garden
Bill has left with Phlegm for the rest of the day, and I"ve come out here to escape everyone.
Well, that andI can watch Harry play Quidditch from here.
I really wish they'd let me play.
Though, I imagine I'd get too distracted by watching Harry diving for the snitch (Fred and George nicked it before they left Hogwarts) that I'd fall off my broom.
I'd like to have a go on Harry's Firebolt, though.
?
A Cupboard
I'm locked up in a cupboard somewhere. Didn't know we even had a cupboard large enough to hold someone my size.
Not, you know, to say that I'm exceptionally large or anything.
There's light coming from somewhere.
That's how I can see to write.
Obviously.
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The Cupboard
It would appear that the ghoul does not live in the attic anymore. (I was beginning to wonder where he went off to.)
Apparently, he lives in this cupboard.
At least I'm not alone in here.
Although, it keeps staring at me like it's a House Elf. I wonder if it knows something.
Do ghouls even have brains? I should ask.
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The Cupboard
The ghoul really isn't so bad, though I haven't the foggiest what he was trying to tell me. Sounded a bit like 'Get out.'
I wonder what he means by that.
His name is Henry, though. He's rather sweet.