Italics are flashbacks.

Chapter 6

I am sure Jou felt like a kid in a candy store. Everything was new and exciting for him. The next morning, I woke him for his appointment with his therapist. After that, I took it upon myself to show him around. It was like an adventure on my behalf too, I just never knew what the kid would remember or forget.

Television for example. Jou knew what it was, and he even remembered pieces of his favourite shows. He didn't understand the microwave at first, or the computer, but I think he either got used to those, or remembered them anyways.

I had to always keep an eye on him; else he would wander off to some other spot in the house where I could never find him. I am sure he found this amusing to say the least, but I lost it almost every time I couldn't find him, afraid he had gotten into something harmful, toxic, dangerous, and would not be able to get out.

Mokuba liked having another body in the house as well. He and Jou would spend hours playing videogames and watching movies. This I did not mind, as long as Jou was always asking questions, getting answers, and learning about the world around him.

At least everybody was accepting to this change, or at least, having him in the house. It didn't always used to be this way.

"I don't think I can do this…"

"You'll be fine, seriously. He is accepting, you have no idea. Please, you said you would come. Do it? For me?"

"I am having second thoughts about this, but alright."

"Can I help you boys?"

"Can I see-"

"He's in his room, go up and see him."

The stairs felt like miles upon tired feet. The door at the top of the case was like my impending doom, a monster hidden behind it.

"You know how I said I was seeing someone? I wasn't lying…I just didn't know how to tell you."

"It's ok, really, I understand."

"You do?"

"You can't explain love, it just works. As long as everything is fine, and you are happy, so am I. I want to see how this works out."

"I think it could work out. You think so too?"

"I suppose…I hope…"

"See, we are on the right track already!"

"You are always so optimistic; I don't know how you do it."

"It is just easier to be pessimistic…"

"Are you saying I take the easy way out?"

"Ha-ha, no, I didn't mean it that way. Think of it like this. I am here to show you the good life. You have had enough of the bad; it is time for the good."

"Seto?"

I snapped out of my thoughts, "Hmm?"

"I said, Jou is hungry, and so am I. Can we get some food?"

"Yea, sure Mokuba, I'll order in."
"Can we go out please?"

"Alright, hurry up and get ready."

I made my way up to Jou's room. He was sitting on his bed, holding a book upside down. I smiled, "Jou, what are you doing?"

"Man Seto, I can read like, half the words in the book, and actually understand them!"

I had to laugh, "Good for you, now just imagine if you were holding the book the right way, you might be able to read it in its entirety.

You know that look Einstein must have had, when he discovered the theory of relativity, one of those dumbstruck 'Eureka! I have it!' looks? That was kind of like how Jou was. I think he was so startled to realize he actually had not forgotten something, he surprised even himself.

"Wow this is actually quite amazing…"

"Get dressed; we are going out for dinner."

"Really? Where?"

I shrugged my shoulders, "I have no clue, just out. Now hurry or we'll leave you behind."

I closed the door, images that blonde scrambling to get his clothes on. Should I trust him to dress himself? Sure, why not, if he looks foolish, who cares, I am sure Jou would like to go through a day without everyone fussing over how he looks, if he looks presentable. Tonight was a lazy night, I just wanted to walk someplace cozy, get a meal, and eat in the park.

The park…

"Here? N-now? But anyone could be watching…"

"That's the fun part. Don't know if you will get caught, don't know when you will get caught. Sort of arousing, isn't it?"

"Not really…"

"Will you just shut up and kiss me already?"

Not like I was one to follow orders, but that sounded reasonable. I was just freaked out, one of his friends could just come strolling by, and they didn't even know about it yet…

Jou put his hand on the back of my head, and forced my mouth to his. I guess I was talking too long. I soon forgot about that. His other hand was making traces about my neck, tickling my senses. His lips felt so soft, and I put my hand on the crease of his back to pull him closer. His tongue now made its way into my mouth, and was prodding around. I accepted this, and explored his mouth in return.

We had never kissed like this, in public, our hearts on our sleeves. But there was something about the situation that made me not care in the least. Made me think that the moment would last forever…

"I forgot about that place. Me and Seto used to go there when he had days off to get fries and milkshakes. I think that was before he started to drive, it was just a walk over. Anyways Jou, you will never get fries like these anyplace else in the world."

I watched as Jou shoved a few into his mouth, "They are good."

His appetite was almost returning to normal, but I was still told to give him foods that were easier to digest. Nothing like steak, or salad. Stuff like Potatoes, rice, chicken, things you give a one year old when they are just getting off baby food. Thank god things didn't come to Jou eating that mush. I mean, I still loved the kid, but I didn't really feel like spoon feeding him…

It was a decent day out, hot, bit breezy, but livable. We walked around the park, twice I think, and then headed home. Just because Jou could walk now, didn't mean he had to. I was still a little cautious on whatever he was doing. He seemed fragile to me, well, like a child. Jou was now my child, and it was my duty to take care of him to the best of my abilities. After all, it was my fault that…

Well, enough on that. I had Jou in bed at around 8ish, he seemed tired after being up and about the whole day. It was much different than being stuck in a hospital bed. I was thinking about heading in early too, I had my work to do tomorrow. I did have Jou to take care of, but I needed to run a company. I would do what I could from my laptop, and when the need arose, I could just go into my office to get things solved.

I was thinking about this as I made my way upstairs. I hadn't made it to the fifth step when the doorbell rang. I looked around; no one seemed to be near me. Maybe if I just pretended I had no heard it… Fuck, there it was again. Might as well get it, just babble to whoever it was, vacuum salesman, whatever, tell them to fuck off and be on my merry way.

"Oh, hi Seto, I hope I didn't wake you." Yuugi stared innocently up at me.

"No, I wasn't asleep yet."

"I just thought I would check on you, you know, with Jou and all."

Was I now obligated to let him in? "He is in bed. Uhh, you can come in if you want though, I could tell you how he is doing."

The boy bounded happily in, "Sure."

"I'll get someone to bring us something to drink. First door on your right."

I left to find a servant. Great, now I had Yuugi to entertain for the night. Jou was only out for a day, did he think I could not handle myself? That I was incapable of taking care of my lover? I mean, it wasn't as if Yuugi knew of anything that went on in Jou's life, even when his dad-

"Can I help you Master Kaiba?"

I was startled out of my train of thought, nearly colliding with a servant? "What? Oh, can you get me and my…guest something to drink?"

"Of course, what will it be?"

"Some sort of pop, just bring a pitcher and two glasses." I needed to get back to Yuugi; I had forgotten I left him alone.

He was sitting on one of the couches when I came into the room. But it wasn't Yuugi. I knew it, I sensed it, it was that other…thing, that other thing that lived inside of him.

"I thought Yuugi wanted to talk to me?"

"He does, and he is listening as well. Have a seat Seto," He gestured to an armchair, MY armchair.

I tried not to look so distasteful of the situation, but I am sure the look on my face gave away what I was thinking. The servant came in with our drinks, and after we each had a sip of Cola, he started to talk.

"How is he?"

"Fine, He is doing just fine. The doctor said his walking has improved a lot; he is back on his feet. His appetite is almost normal, he is becoming the same person he was before..."

"What does he remember?"

"He remembers how to read actually, I don't know how much he understands, but he can read a book to me. He is doing well." That is a lie Seto, you know it. He doesn't remember you…

"How are you doing?"

Me? Who gives a hell how I was doing? "Who cares?" Did I say that out loud? Yes, yes I did.

"You should Seto, because if you aren't well, how can you expect to help Katsuya?"

"I am fine."

I knew he didn't believe me, and rightfully so. I knew I wasn't ok, but the less time I gave myself to think about it, the less I had to face the truth.

"You need to talk about it-"

"I DON'T need to talk about it." I snapped. And I didn't think telling someone about your feelings when they clearly did not care was not going to make matters better.

"Yes you do. You have these feeling inside you, trying to escape. Don't let it consume you."

What could I say to him, without giving myself away? No, I couldn't give in, I didn't need little friends to confide my problems. That is why people are weak, that is why people get so emotional, and that is why I have a boyfriend…but Jou just wouldn't understand what I am saying now, because it is about him, about what used to be. He had no idea how much it hurts, how every little thing he does just KILLS me. No one would get it…

"I am not forcing you to tell me anything Seto; I just want to help you."

That's a lie.

"I know you must be going through a lot right now, you and Jou were so close,"

Beautiful deduction, did you come up with that all on your own?

"-but if I could just understand what you feel now, maybe you would feel better."

"You don't understand." This was true. People tell you they understand, to get you to open up, when really, they get nothing. They don't feel the way you do, they don't think the way you do, they don't act the way you do, so how could they ever begin to comprehend what goes on inside your being.

"I think if-"

I didn't need this. To put it frankly, I just lost it. I leapt up from my chair, and pointed an accusing finger at Yuugi. Rage was spewing out of my mouth before I could stop it.

"I don't give a fuck what you think and I don't give a fuck what you have to say! And when I tell you, you don't understand it, don't question me!"

"Seto-"

"No, I am sick of all of you. You wouldn't be so comfortable, so, CONFIDENT that he is ok, if it was YOU he didn't remember. If it was you, who he looked at, and didn't even KNOW how to feel. Do you know how he looks at me Yuugi? He looks puzzled, sometimes HESITANT when I talk to him. I can't TOUCH him because it doesn't feel right; I can't even shake his fucking HAND without feeling as if I am looking at a stranger! He doesn't know me! He doesn't know me anymore!"

I sat back down, exhausted, depressed, and alone. I knew what I needed to say now; I knew what Yuugi needed to hear. "And I loved him. With all my heart and soul, I love Jounouchi Katsuya to the core. And he doesn't know what love is now."

I raised my eyes; it was Yuugi again, not that other thing. And he was crying. Great, just great, Yuugi started the waterworks. There was no way I was going to cry, I didn't want to, I didn't have to…

"Seto, I am so sorry." He reached for my hand, but I recoiled. I didn't want to be touched; I didn't want to be pitied. I didn't want to exist at that moment.

I collected myself; I felt my face cooling off, and my temper going down. "I told you, I am fine. Now if you don't mind, I would like to get some sleep."

"You don't want to talk about anything else."

"No, just…leave. Please." I didn't want to look at him right now. I wanted to be alone in some dark corner, forgetting about this nightmare.

"Alright Seto, I'll leave, but pushing me away isn't going to help. I know you needed to get that off your chest, and I am sure you are glad you did. But I won't talk about that now, as per your request, I am leaving now." And he did, he got up off the couch and made his way towards the door without assistance. I only got up from my chair when I heard the soft thump of the front doors. Then I knew he was gone.

It was true, even though I didn't believe it, I felt better. I am sure half the house heard my yelling, but I just didn't care.

In this mix of emotions, did I uncover things that were hidden in my mind, hidden from me? It was the voice in the back of my head.

You hate him for what he is doing to you. You hate your own boyfriend.

Maybe, maybe some part of me wished he would just go away, so I wouldn't have to deal with what I had done. I lived with so much hate, I realized now.

But more than anything, you hate yourself.

Pop is something like Coca-Cola, or Sprite. I think Americans call it, soda? I don't know, but we call it pop.

If you didn't know, the conversation in italics at the beginning of the story was between Seto, Jou, Yuugi. Yuugi's grandpa was in there too.

A/N: I know I get a lot of reviews complaining about how short my chapters are. But I don't intend them to be short, I just write what I need to and then post it. I could jumble two chapters at a time, but then I would make less updates, and then MORE people would be complaining, I am sure. So please guys, just bear with me, I work 40 hours a week, and on the two days I have off, I am spending time with my friends before we go off to college. So, making sure my chapters are at least 5,ooo words really is not at the top of my to-do list. Thank you to all the people who compliment me on this story, you guys' support means a lot to me. I will update as soon as I can. So, leave a review, and I will get back to you.