Last
Time: Mousse and Ryoga find Ranma, and
together
they 'team up' to spy on the girls. They get more
than
they bargained for and are promptly kicked out. But did
they
learn from that? No.. so they go back into the
lionesses'
den...
"WITHOUT
RANMA" Part
Nine
By
Shikoku and Steel
The
next morning, three bandaged mummies sat in a row at the
Tendo's
table,
trying
to drink their breakfast. (It was the only way that
they
could eat.)
The
first mummy had a pigtail sticking out of the back of
his
bandaged head,
the
second wore a pair of inch thick glasses, and the third
mummy
had a
yellow
bandanna with little black rectangles all over it
wrapped
around
his
head.
Across
from them sat three irritated young women who were
blatantly
giving
the
mummies the 'cold shoulder' and no amount of pleading
would
make the
girls
forgive them for interrupting yet AGAIN.
If
Ranma had been able to move, he would have whapped
Mousse.
"This is all
YOUR
fault," he whispered to the taller mummy.
"Shut
up, Ranma!" Ryoga snapped. He and Ranma stood up and
started
facing
off,
but before they could begin their battle, they suddenly
felt
an
intense
amount
of chi. Turning, they came face to face with three
angry,
aura generating
females.
"Eh
heh heh heh!" they laughed with their hands behind their
heads.
The
girls
glared some more and they quickly sat down. They were
forced
to resort
to
shooting dirty looks at each other lest they suffered the
girls'
wrath
again.
Now
that the dumb boys had shut up, the girls went back to
eating
their
breakfast
in peace.
Interestingly
enough, this went unnoticed by the other
residents
of the
household.
Soun was reading his morning paper, Genma was
lost
in his own
world
of food, Kasumi was happy and cheerful as usual and
Nabiki
had already
left
for school, claiming to have an early morning
'appointment'.
They
had all probably perfected the art of ignoring Ranma
and
Akane when
they
were in one of their.. moods.. They had years of
practice
after all..
Hmm..
point taken.. Anyway, right about here was when Ukyo
and
Akane realized
that
if they didn't get their tails in gear, they'd be late
for
school.
Akane
grabbed her lunch from Kasumi and was out the in a
flash.
Ukyo was
right
behind her, and poor lil Shampoo sniffed and looked
sad,
cause they
had
left her all alone..
'Til
Akane came running back in, grabbed her by the hand and
dragged
her
along
behind.
All
this happened in such a short amount of time that Ranma
hadn't
even
gotten
up from the table yet.
The
other two mummies blinked. "Do they always leave in such
a
hurry?" Mousse
asked,
wishing he could move his arm close enough to his
face
so he could
push
his drooping glasses back up.
Ryoga
nodded sagely, having seen it enough times as P-chan
to
know. Meanwhile
Ranma
was trying to get his knees to bend so he could walk..
"Wow.." said Mousse, impressed.
Shampoo
let Akane drag her a long ways up the street, before
finally
saying
anything.
"Uh, A-chan? Where you taking me?"
Akane and Ukyo blinked then at once they stopped.
Shampoo
almost tripped and fell down because of the sudden
stop,
but Akane
didn't
let that happen.
Ukyo looked to Akane. "She has a point, sugar." she said.
Akane
nodded. "Yeah I guess.. sorry 'bout that Sham-chan."
she
apologized.
"Guess
I wasn't thinking.."
"Is
okay." Shampoo answered, giving them a reassuring grin.
"Shampoo
didn't
want
to be alone with men, anyway."
Akane laughed. "Very true." she said with a grin.
"Yeah."
Ukyo nodded. "I'm still not sure how to act around
them..
now that
they
kind of know and all.."
"They just need get used to it." Shampoo stated.
The
others nodded, still not sure if they like having other
people
knowing
their
secret.
"I guess you're right.." said Ukyo, hesitantly.
"You
want Shampoo make them forget?" the amazon
asked.
"Great-Grandmother
still
have 119 shampoo."
Ukyo
and Akane glanced at each other and mentally debated
with
themselves
for
a few minutes. Akane finally sighed. "That sounds nice,
but
they'd probably
just
end up finding out again sooner or later. I think we're
just
gonna
have
to live with them knowing. Maybe then Ranma and the
others
will leave
us
alone."
Shampoo nodded thoughtfully.
Ukyo
noticed. "Alright, what's going on in that
purple-haired
head of yours,
sugar?"
Shampoo
looked up, a bit surprised by Ukyo's tone. "Shampoo
was
just thinking
that
it your decision. Shampoo won't interfere if you no
want
her to."
Ukyo
took Shampoo up into a hug. "It's not just 'our'
decision,
Love, it
should
be ALL of ours."
Shampoo
shook slightly at being called 'Love' and she hugged
back.
Nobody
had
ever called her that before.. (Well, Mousse had, but
with all
the effect
it
had he might as well have called her a doornob..)
Akane
added her own hug and embraced them both. "Yeah, we're
all
in this
TOGETHER.
For better or worse, no matter what."
After
school that day, Ranma trudged along the fence. He was
in
a deep blue
funk.
Whoever said that 'ignorance was bliss' was probably
right,
he mused
to
himself.
He
now knew the truth the girls were hiding from him, and
he'd
been obsessing
over
it the whole day. It didn't help that he had to watch
them
all day,
too.
Sure, they were subtle, but Ranma had caught every
single
time Akane
and
Ukyo touched (which was actually quite often). It was
even
more obvious
when
Shampoo was there. She barely hid her affections..
Ranma
couldn't believe that he actually MISSED that it used
to
be HIM that
Shampoo
was affectionate to..
Yes,
Ranma's ego had definitely been squashed. So much to
the
point, that
he'd
even resort to the most.. unpleasant means to heal his
ego..
And that's what he was going to do.
He
hopped off the fence as he approached his destination.
There
before him
loomed
the massive gates of the Kuno Mansion. He shuddered at
the
thought
of
what he was about to do, but he couldn't help it. He was
a
Saotome! Saotomes
were
SUPPOSED to be swamped by so many girls that EVERY other
boy
was jealous
to
the point of hatred! He'd been really proud of his harem
of
fiancees
and
now it seemed that they'd abandoned him for EACH OTHER.
That
thought REALLY killed his over-sized male ego. Which is
why
he was
currently
standing in front of the Kunos' gate, ready to knock.
Yes, He was desperate:
He
was here to see Kodachi. cue dramatic scary music He
raised
hand to
the
gate, swallowed, then knocked loudly.
To
his relief (kind of) Sasuke answered the door. "Oh, my
Ranma
Saotome,
what
are YOU doing here?" the little ninja/butler asked.
Ranma
squared his shoulders and gritted his teeth. "I.. I
wanna
see Kodachi."
he
said.
"I'm
afraid you have come to the wrong place, Ranma
Saotome."
said another
voice.
Ranma's gaze moved past the ninja retainer and up the
path
to where
Tatewaki
Kuno was walking toward the gate. "My twisted
sister
no longer
resides
within this noble dwelling, but may I inquire as to
why
such a lowly
vermin
as yourself wishes to see her?"
Ranma
blinked. "Kodachi's not here anymore? Why? Where is
she?"
A small
part
of him actually felt concern for the psychopath..
"Do
not worry, my sister is perfectly fine, I assure you."
Kuno
said, clearly
irritated
by Ranma's presence. "In fact, I was just on my
way
out to visit
her."
"Master.."
Sasuke said slowly. "Why not take Saotome with
you?
Surely even
he
has enough honor not to cause a disturbance there."
Kuno's
lips pursed in thought as he considered. Ranma
fidgeted
slightly.
"Come
along then." the kendoist said curtly. "My sister
would
no doubt enjoy
seeing
you once again, though the gods themselves only know
why."
He pushed
past
Ranma, fully expecting the shorter youth to follow, and
continued
down
the
road to only he knew where.
It
was a strong case of curiosity that made Ranma start to
follow
the Kendoist.
As
they walked in silence, Ranma's mind started thinking of
all
the possibilities
of
where Kodachi could be. His two favorites were that
Kodachi
was finally
thrown
in jail for disturbing the peace or something.. or
that
Kodachi was
finally
labeled insane and was taken to the Funny Farm.
It
was because of these daydreams that made Ranma so
surprised
to see that
they
stopped at the Nerima Catholic Church.
"What're
we doin here?" Ranma wondered out loud. "You
switch
religions
or
somethin'
Kuno?"
Kuno shook his head. "Are you really so simple, Saotome?"
Just
then, one of the nuns that were scurrying about, noticed
them
and hurried
over.
"Brother Dear!" she exclaimed. "How good of you
to
visit!"
And she
hugged
the upperclassman.
Kuno
hugged back. "Why of course, my dear younger sister."
said
he.
"KODACHI!"
Ranma exclaimed, shocked. He couldn't believe
his
eyes, Kodachi
was a
nun! A CATHOLIC nun! He nearly fainted dead away.
The
Kuno's stopped hugging to stare at him. "What's wrong
with
him?" Kodachi
asked,
looking concerned.
"I
believe, my dear sister, that the sight of your noble
Kuno
self, in the
accouterment
of a Sister of the Church has, shall we say,
'surprised'
him."
Kuno
answered, merely casting the Saotome youth a
distasteful
glance.
"Oh..
that's funny," and Kodachi started laughing, a gentler
version
of
her
psycho laugh, with one hand lifted delicately to her
mouth
in a feminine
motion.
Ranma looked ready to faint again..
"What's
the matter, Ranma-dear?" Kodachi asked. He looked so
cute
at the
moment;
she almost wished she hadn't taken that vow of
celibacy...
Almost.
"I
think your choice of 'vocation' has, it appears,
dumbfounded
him." Kuno
said
for Ranma who seemed have to lost all control over
his
body.
"Dumbfounded
him?" Kodachi looked surprised at the idea.
"Why,
but where
else
would an innocent snowflake, such as myself, in the
world
of dirty
dirty
people, go to stay clean and pure?"
"'Dirty
people'?" Ranma asked, confused. Right now his brain
was
REALLY
having
a hard time absorbing this..
"Why
that wicked girl, Akane Tendo, and her 'friends'"
Kodachi
informed
him,
putting a lot of sarcasm in the 'friends' part.
Ranma's jaw dropped. They KNEW? But.. but HOW?
"My
Dear Sister," Kuno said to Kodachi in a reprimanding
tone.
"I would
ask
you to not speak of Akane Tendo in such a manner. It
does
not befit
a
woman of The Faith such as yourself."
Kodachi
blushed a bit at her big brother's reprimand. "I'm
sorry,
Brother
Dear,
but I only speak the truth. Someday your eyes will be
opened
and you
will
see, but it isn't my place to help you. Forgive me?"
"Of
course Sister." Kuno answered, smiling gently. He then
turned
to Ranma.
"Now
Saotome, was there any specific reason you wanted to
see
my sister?"
Ranma
blanched at having both Kunos staring at him so.. The
reason
he had
wanted
to see Kodachi was quickly defeated by the sight of
her in
her nun
habit.
It left him stuttering, incoherently grasping for a
good
excuse for
being
there.
Kuno
arched an eyebrow at the shorter young man. He'd always
known
Saotome
was an
idiot, but he'd never known that Ranma was a
STUTTERING
idiot.
Kodachi
merely watched him curiously, wondering what he
wanted
to see her
about.
"Uh..
you see.. I.. uh.. just wanted to say 'hi', so 'Hi!'
He
then shook
Kodachi's
hand real fast, then retreated, walking as fast as
he
could, trying
to be
as dignified as possible under the circumstances.
He left two rather befuddled Kuno siblings in his wake.
"What's wrong with him?" Kodachi wondered aloud.
"I
have been wondering the same since I met him." Kuno
answered,
shaking
his
head.
Ranma
aimlessly wandered around Nerima, walking wherever the
fencetop
took
him.
The reason for his wanderings was that he was deep in
thought.
(Well,
as
deep as RANMA could go anyway.) He was pondering the odd
change
in the
Kunos.
He wondered why Kodachi had suddenly become a nun,
and he
wondered
why
Kuno wasn't using the flowery nonsencical gibberish that
Kunoist
was so
infamous for.
It
seemed to him, as he walked about, that just about all
the
major players
had
changed in some way.. Akane, Ukyo, Shampoo, Ryoga,
Mousse,
and even
the
Kunos were different now.. Boy, he had no idea so much
could
become
so
different in only three months.. He wasn't sure he liked
it..
The
reason why, of course, was pure ego. He was no longer
the
center of
attention
anymore. He was used to having all the girls
fawn
all over him,
and a
good fight from all the guys. He couldn't even
remember
the last time
someone
glomped him.
As
if in answer, water fell onto him from the sky and
something
suddenly
glomped
onto HER chest. She looked down and to her horror,
found
none-other-than
Happosai,
nuzzling his head in her ample bosom.
At
least some things didn't change. Ranma-chan was actually
HAPPY
to see
the
little pervert. She showed her happiness by pounding
Happy
to the ground.
"Get
off me you Old FREAK!" she yelled in her
soprano
voice.
"Ranma!
Is that any way to treat your Master?" Happosai
exclaimed,
twirling
his
pipe.
"Under
the circumstances.. YES!" answered Ranma-chan. She
started
trying
to
punch Happy again, but he kept darting out of the way.
"Old..
FREAK!" Ranma-chan snarled, frustrated. She decided
to
take out all
of
her aggravations on the diminutive pervert by smashing
him
into bean
paste.
If only she could actually HIT him..
Unfortunately
before a single blow was landed, Happosai got
bored
and with
a
touch of his pipe, Ranma-chan was airborn. He then cackled
evilly
and
hopped
away, flipping up skirts and glomping young girls
along
the way.
As
the red-haired, pig-tailed girl flew through the air, she
noted
again, how she just didn't seem to be winning lately.
To Be Continued...
Will
Ranma ewver win again? Can the girls deal with the boys
knowing
their secret? Find out next time..